Survivor: Literotica!

[Byron In Exile]

crab sammiches for everyone!

They can't be alive, because that's scary.

although, i would prefer to make hermit crab tamales with those ingredients.

There isn't much meat, there.

Basically just their claws, and those aren't very big.

There's calcium in the exoskeleton, but good luck getting that down.

 

[Honey123]

this is why i don't like being team leader. plus, something tells me honey would throw me under the bus first chance she got.

please be on team booby.

wait...there will be a bus on this island?

 

[Wat_Tyler]

I'm sorry, I was looking at your eyes.

No really.

What eyes?

this is why i don't like being team leader. plus, something tells me honey would throw me under the bus first chance she got.

please be on team booby.

*turns nose in air, loads tits and leaves thread*

 

[Byron In Exile]

one more...

dolf!

muahahahahaha

Woohoo!!1

Great pick.

Let's see how you handle it when she demands you build her a ferris wheel out of bamboo.

One more, now. You have to pick two at a time.

 

[Byron In Exile]

The Story So Far:

Tribe #1: Byron, Perg, Pete, Mona, Laurel

Tribe #2: Neci, Honey, Image, Dolf, ...?

We're almost half-way through picking tribes.

Probst (who is a bit of a dick) said I can't tell you anything about the first immunity challenge except that it involves a porcupine.

 

[neci]

wait...there will be a bus on this island?

oh yes. there will be a bus. dolf is building it from recycled hermit crabs.

*turns nose in air, loads tits and leaves thread*

fine then. no presents for you.

Woohoo!!1

Great pick.

Let's see how you handle it when she demands you build her a ferris wheel out of bamboo.

One more, now. You have to pick two at a time.

i need some cock.

kybele!

 

[Byron In Exile]

i make a mean sammich and i don't run fast.

pick me!

I would have. But now you've stepped in it and you're in charge of picking an entire tribe.

Right now, you seem to be working an Estrogenfest.

In Survivor: Amazon! the tribes were divided by sex. One tribe was all women, the other all men. Initially, the men were like, "oh, we got this! They don't stand a chance!" And they went and built an awesome shelter - made an awesome camp. The women didn't do anything. It was as though they were just waiting for everything to get done somehow. They had no shelter and their camp sucked. And they were miserable.

Yet, at challenges, the women kept beating the men. And the men would come back to their awesome camp asking each other "how in the hell did that just happen?" It was hilarious.

Eventually, both tribes internally started hating each other. The men were at each other, the women were at each other, but then when they were required to swap members, both tribes suddenly came alive.

Most notably, the pretty girls weren't liked so much at the girl's camp. Their tits had no magical powers over the other girls.

So... if you think you can just pick members of one sex for your tribe, that might be a bad strategy, unless lesbians are involved. Initially, you want strong people who can work at camp and perform at challenges. Once it gets past tribe against tribe, and it's individual against individual, the people who were formerly assets can become huge targets. Think about that. And start thinking about it two steps before the merge.

Survivor is the one of the most complex psychological games ever. Adding to the idea of being stranded with nineteen people you know nothing about — the physical strain of being in a primitive environment, hunting for food (coconuts, fish, hermit crabs, or insects), being eaten alive by mosquitoes, trying to sleep when any noise might mean you're about to get eaten by an animal...

The only way I would ever submit to something like this would be if every other contestant was a Literotican. Srsly. Then it would totally be worth it.

 

[Byron In Exile]

i need some cock.

kybele!

Ok.

Tribe #1: Byron, Perg, Pete, Mona, Laurel

Tribe #2: Neci, Honey, Image, Dolf, Kybele

So you have one male and four females. You know that's dangerous, right? That's an imbalance of power. Kybele might end up running that little show you have goin' on.

I should mention, also, that Laurel's presence on my tribe is not necessarily a strength nor a weakness. She is ordinarily rather tacit, but it is my belief that she can be relied upon in challenges. Especially those involving problem-solving. But I can assure everyone that I will not hesitate to stab her in the back just as I might have to do to Perg or Pete. (Not Mona, though. I'd be pleased to end up sitting next to those legs in the final two. Literally.)

 

[Joeybagadonuts]

I always root for the hottest babe. Who's the hottest babe in the game?

 

[neci]

i pick bubbles and manu!

 

[Joeybagadonuts]

I want to sneak into the jungle with neci and play with her coconuts.

 

[neci]

I would have. But now you've stepped in it and you're in charge of picking an entire tribe.

Right now, you seem to be working an Estrogenfest.

In Survivor: Amazon! the tribes were divided by sex. One tribe was all women, the other all men. Initially, the men were like, "oh, we got this! They don't stand a chance!" And they went and built an awesome shelter - made an awesome camp. The women didn't do anything. It was as though they were just waiting for everything to get done somehow. They had no shelter and their camp sucked. And they were miserable.

Yet, at challenges, the women kept beating the men. And the men would come back to their awesome camp asking each other "how in the hell did that just happen?" It was hilarious.

Eventually, both tribes internally started hating each other. The men were at each other, the women were at each other, but then when they were required to swap members, both tribes suddenly came alive.

Most notably, the pretty girls weren't liked so much at the girl's camp. Their tits had no magical powers over the other girls.

So... if you think you can just pick members of one sex for your tribe, that might be a bad strategy, unless lesbians are involved. Initially, you want strong people who can work at camp and perform at challenges. Once it gets past tribe against tribe, and it's individual against individual, the people who were formerly assets can become huge targets. Think about that. And start thinking about it two steps before the merge.

Survivor is the one of the most complex psychological games ever. Adding to the idea of being stranded with nineteen people you know nothing about — the physical strain of being in a primitive environment, hunting for food (coconuts, fish, hermit crabs, or insects), being eaten alive by mosquitoes, trying to sleep when any noise might mean you're about to get eaten by an animal...

The only way I would ever submit to something like this would be if every other contestant was a Literotican. Srsly. Then it would totally be worth it.

i'm just here to have fun and eat crabs. winning the grand prize would be super fancy, but i know my limits. i am prone to heat stroke, hate mosquitos and have a sensitive stomach. on the plus side, i am crafty and cunning. plus, i've never had a problem working in an estrogen infused, drama filled environment. besides, i have honey, and she will kick your ass. you're just jealous.

Ok.

Tribe #1: Byron, Perg, Pete, Mona, Laurel

Tribe #2: Neci, Honey, Image, Dolf, Kybele

So you have one male and four females. You know that's dangerous, right? That's an imbalance of power. Kybele might end up running that little show you have goin' on.

I should mention, also, that Laurel's presence on my tribe is not necessarily a strength nor a weakness. She is ordinarily rather tacit, but it is my belief that she can be relied upon in challenges. Especially those involving problem-solving. But I can assure everyone that I will not hesitate to stab her in the back just as I might have to do to Perg or Pete. (Not Mona, though. I'd be pleased to end up sitting next to those legs in the final two. Literally.)

laurel bites when she sucks. watch out.

I always root for the hottest babe. Who's the hottest babe in the game?

bubbles

 

[neci]

I want to sneak into the jungle with neci and play with her coconuts.

jeff probst?! is that you?!

 

[Byron In Exile]

I always root for the hottest babe. Who's the hottest babe in the game?

Honestly? Probably Mona. And she's on my tribe.

So, there's that.

 

[Joeybagadonuts]

Byron, does your game involve nude, mud wrestling?

just a suggestion from a viewer

 

[Byron In Exile]

i pick bubbles and manu!

Lol...!

It's my turn to pick two.

I've pretty much decided on Lorilei13, but I'm not sure about the second.

I was considering Islandman, but that would be like picking Bubbles. I might as well pick Bubbles, which might actually be a better choice, since he(she) could be more easily isolated, and I'm not sure how much help Islandman would be around camp, anyway.

But in the beginning, it's more important to have strong players... so I haven't decided, yet.

 

[Honey123]

I got new boots...and I will kick ass.

Can we synchronize our periods? Dolf is a nasty bitch when she PMS's....we may stand a chance at winning yet!!!! And to think, we do kill someone, we have a sound reason.

 

[Image]

Do we still get to bring along one personal item? This could get interesting...

 

[Lorilei]

Lol...!

It's my turn to pick two.

I've pretty much decided on Lorilei13, but I'm not sure about the second.

I was considering Islandman, but that would be like picking Bubbles. I might as well pick Bubbles, which might actually be a better choice, since he(she) could be more easily isolated, and I'm not sure how much help Islandman would be around camp, anyway.

But in the beginning, it's more important to have strong players... so I haven't decided, yet.

Only "pretty much"?

Don't make me slice and dice.

 

[MonaLittle]

oh Yay!! Im in the tribe!
And what a hot Tribe it is!

We definitely need Lori! No If's about it. She's got Skilz.
We will kickass!

 

[neci]

I got new boots...and I will kick ass.

Can we synchronize our periods? Dolf is a nasty bitch when she PMS's....we may stand a chance at winning yet!!!! And to think, we do kill someone, we have a sound reason.

i think our synchronized period tribe will kick serious ass. yay for new boots!

Do we still get to bring along one personal item? This could get interesting...

yes. in your case, you may bring along two.

 

[neci]

Only "pretty much"?

Don't make me slice and dice.

slice and dice! slice and dice!

oh Yay!! Im in the tribe!
And what a hot Tribe it is!

We definitely need Lori! No If's about it. She's got Skilz.
We will kickass!

your team sucks rory balls.

 

[MonaLittle]

slice and dice! slice and dice!



your team sucks rory balls.

o0o0o ....them is fightin' words, sistah!!

 

[Lorilei]

slice and dice! slice and dice!

Not to be confused with shake and bake.

 

[neci]

o0o0o ....them is fightin' words, sistah!!

something tells me you won't be able to walk come challenge day.

Not to be confused with shake and bake.

would you like to be in a triple secret alliance with my tribe? i promise not to let anyone know about it.