When is NO really NO?

[JMohegan]

Yes. Bitch. Mmhmm.


(Ok, I was thinking the same thing but didn't say it. )

You know, there are people who think a spider strolling across a sternum wouldn't be a big deal, either.

 

[BiBunny]

Yes. Bitch. Mmhmm.


(Ok, I was thinking the same thing but didn't say it. )

My brain-to-keyboard filter just isn't as highly refined as yours is yet.

 

[satindesire]

How delightful. You've taken me off ignore.

If this is the question you want to address, by all means feel free to address it.

I always like to give people second chances, no matter how much they've hurt me.

And no, that's not a question I want to address, I was just commenting on the fact that that seems to be the question in the thread.

 

[intothewoods]

You know, there are people who think a spider strolling across a sternum wouldn't be a big deal, either.

I could do it! How big is the spider?

I do feel so blessed that Mister Man has not expressed an interest in fucking with my phobias.

My brain-to-keyboard filter just isn't as highly refined as yours is yet.

Maybe I'm secretly a big whore for anal. I dunno. Mostly I'm poo-phobic. I mean, you can clean, but it's still a tushy.

 

[satindesire]

I could do it! How big is the spider?

I do feel so blessed that Mister Man has not expressed an interest in fucking with my phobias.



Maybe I'm secretly a big whore for anal. I dunno. Mostly I'm poo-phobic. I mean, you can clean, but it's still a tushy.

"Tushy". Heh.

 

[graceanne]

Does it make me a raging, insensitive bitch to say, unless you have some awful disease of the digestive system (e.g., Crohn's), anal, in the grand scheme of things, really ain't that big a deal? And this coming from someone who really doesn't like anal that much at all.

Honestly, that's my feeling. I have crohns, so it's a no no (which annoys the snot out of K, but the few times we tried to ignore that i bled for days). Before I got sick we had anal sex occasionally. Sure did nothing for me, but it's not always about me, is it? That said, it's not a phobia for me. Try and get me on a bridge you might get a bit resistance. LOL

 

[JMohegan]

I could do it! How big is the spider?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PadauuWF94w

 

[intothewoods]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PadauuWF94w

Must. Not. Click!

 

[JMohegan]

Must. Not. Click!

You know you want to....

 

[intothewoods]

You know you want to....

That is really manipulative!

 

[rosco rathbone]

Must. Not. Click!

Don't do it. It even gave me the horrors.

 

[midwestyankee]

How the hell do you get this from anything he wrote?

He never described his M.O. as: fuck you, I'm shoving it in.

"Must prove that I can't be denied, even if it takes years." That's what he said.

Patience is a virtue! Except in BDSM?

The post from Rosco to which I replied said, in its entirety: "I personally will stop at nothing!"

If you can spot the patience and knowledge of the submissive that you later described, please point it out to me.

 

[JMohegan]

The post from Rosco to which I replied said, in its entirety: "I personally will stop at nothing!"

If you can spot the patience and knowledge of the submissive that you later described, please point it out to me.

Try reading posts 5 and 7.

Or not, if the urge for righteous outrage is what's getting you off this evening. Whatever.

 

[rosco rathbone]

Try reading posts 5 and 7.

Or not, if the urge for righteous outrage is what's getting you off this evening. Whatever.

Sometimes my sense of humor is a little flat and dry. I think MWY is drawing the all important line between "hard" and "soft" limit.

 

[midwestyankee]

This is where patience and guile and skill at manipulation come in. You just keep chipping away, then one day you are riding her rectum, using her pigtails like reins, slapping her ass and saying "now who owns the anus, bitch?"

Of patience, guile and skill at manipulation, two of the three are about getting one's needs satisfied regardless of the submissive's hard limits.

What "No" means to me is "Must prove that I can't be denied, even if it takes years".

If this isn't about getting one's needs satisfied regardless of the submissive's hard limits, then I guess I just can't read English.

Try reading posts 5 and 7.

Or not, if the urge for righteous outrage is what's getting you off this evening. Whatever.

I don't have any righteous outrage here at all. I asked a clarifying question and you did what you could to answer me. However, in that answer, you implied that I had not read the entire discussion in the thread whe, in fact, I have.

Now, it's entirely possible that all of Rosco's posts in this thread have been tongue in cheek, in which case I must be just too much of a literalist to walk the same ground as you, JM.

Sometimes my sense of humor is a little flat and dry. I think MWY is drawing the all important line between "hard" and "soft" limit.

Exactly. So what's the line, Rosco? I ask not out of outrage but out of curiosity.

 

[rosco rathbone]

Now, it's entirely possible that all of Rosco's posts in this thread have been tongue in cheek, in which case I must be just too much of a literalist to walk the same ground as you, JM.

My posts are semi-tongue in cheek, but at bottom, I don't believe in hard limits. If there's something I want, and you don't want, then I'm going to do whatever I have to do to get over, under or around that limit, like Obama and health care reform.

 

[midwestyankee]

My posts are semi-tongue in cheek, but at bottom, I don't believe in hard limits. If there's something I want, and you don't want, then I'm going to do whatever I have to do to get over, under or around that limit, like Obama and health care reform.

And do you inform your submissives at the beginning of your relationship that this is your modus operandi?

 

[rosco rathbone]

And do you inform your submissives at the beginning of your relationship that this is your modus operandi?

No. That would imply a level of organization, discipline and honesty that is far beyond my capabilities

 

[midwestyankee]

No. That would imply a level of organization, discipline and honesty that is far beyond my capabilities

Is it fair to say then that being manipulative is an essential element to your kink?

 

[rosco rathbone]

Is it fair to say then that being manipulative is an essential element to your kink?

More of a means/ends thing but yes.

 

[midwestyankee]

More of a means/ends thing but yes.

Fair enough, then. As long as you own your own shit.

Carry on.

 

[JMohegan]

In other words, your form of dominance is all about satisfying your needs without regard for the submissive's hard limits? Seems to me that you don't really want a submissive; you want a blow-up doll with a pulse.

This is the part I don't understand.

What the heck does a blow-up doll have to do with sexual conquest?

MWY, is that really an urge you've never felt? The urge to overcome stated resistance or refusal, I mean.

 

[the captians wench]

First off I want to say this whole idea of overcoming any idea of limits that I have is one I've found very erotic and even liberating. Now I haven't been one to deny any partner much of anything. I'm usually pretty open to anything, but I do have a few things I'm reluctant to. When those few things are slowly cleared away, and my worries or even fears wiped clean, yes the feeling is very liberating and the connection I feel to the PYL that accomplished this is very deep.

My posts are semi-tongue in cheek, but at bottom, I don't believe in hard limits. If there's something I want, and you don't want, then I'm going to do whatever I have to do to get over, under or around that limit, like Obama and health care reform.

And do you inform your submissives at the beginning of your relationship that this is your modus operandi?

Informing me would, in this case, not actually be apreciated. I don't need, or want, to know that you plan on easing my tentions on any particular subject. It would break the illusion for me, and would probably send me running in all honesty. I want you to sneak in under my radar, but I also want to have enough trust in you before hand to not feel the need to turn the radar on in the first place.

Something you want that I have an issue with, for what ever reason, make me want it more than you do, I'll be puddy in your hands.

 

[ownedsubgal]

Does it make me a raging, insensitive bitch to say, unless you have some awful disease of the digestive system (e.g., Crohn's), anal, in the grand scheme of things, really ain't that big a deal? And this coming from someone who really doesn't like anal that much at all.

perhaps from a physical standpoint, no, it's not that big of a deal (barring physical medical issues). however far more often "hard limits" or high levels of resistance to specific activities have more to do with the mind than body. say for instance a girl was anally raped in the past, then it can be understandable why she would never wish to engage in anal sex again, regardless of the circumstances, regardless how compassionate or seductive the dominant partner.

simple bondage is no big deal to most folks who frequent this board, but it gives me flashbacks of childhood abuse and leaves me in a really dark place for a really long time. doesn't make it a limit, as i don't have the privilege of those...but it definitely makes it an area where my Master has to tread carefully, and weigh his desires against my mental stability.

 

[graceanne]

First off I want to say this whole idea of overcoming any idea of limits that I have is one I've found very erotic

Yep, me too. Took me awhile to learn that about myself. It also makes me very glad that K and I have similar hard limits. It all boils down to knowing your dominant before you agree to submit.

Honestly, my feeling is that if you REALLY don't want to have anal sex, then you should be careful not to end up in a relationship with someone who won't be happy unless they're getting anal sex. The reverse is true. If you cannot be happy without anal sex, then you should avoid relationships with someone who won't/can't.