Writing kinks you don’t share

[AG31]

I tried to write a gay male piece once, because I've long assumed that it would feel the same as writing a straight piece just with the genders adjusted; this should have worked, since I often write FP stories from both male and female perspectives. I abandoned it halfway along. I think I could have finished it and made it work, but it just didn't interest me after the plot started resolving itself.

I did once complete a pegging piece because I was curious whether I could (it's not really publishable here, but it "exists"), and it seems I can. I published an incest piece here because it made sense for the character involved, but it didn't really turn me on; it interested me because of the character dynamics. I also did a BDSM piece because a very close friend requested it, and I'm proud of it, but it's not something I would have chosen to write on my own and it wasn't really well received here (though my friend loved it, which was the point).

I write for someone just like me, so writing kinks I don't have doesn't make much sense really.

What does FP mean? I looked at the categories on the story side, didn't find it.

I write for someone just like me, so writing kinks I don't have doesn't make much sense really.

Yeah, me too.

(it's not really publishable here, but it "exists"),

Why wasn't it publishable? Age thing? Too much violence? I'm interested in pinning down what is rejectable at Lit.

 

[Kumquatqueen]

I write a fair few kinks that aren't mine and go beyond any interest I may have. I find extrapolating from enjoying one type of sensation makes it feasible to write about others. Being bisexual helps with writing about different sexes, but I've ended up writing male protagonists nearly as often as female ones.

I did write one incest story, something totally alien to my interests, to see if I could produce a story that I/T viewers rated while I tried to stick to the limits of what I could bring myself to write about. Seemed to work and was an interesting exercise, but I'm not planning to try it again - too many plot bunnies on the go!

(FP - First Person, ie the narrator is 'I'.)

 

[Voboy]

What does FP mean? I looked at the categories on the story side, didn't find it.

First person.

Why wasn't it publishable? Age thing? Too much violence? I'm interested in pinning down what is rejectable at Lit.

I think it would get published here, but when I said "not really" I meant it probably shouldn't be. The publication would be based solely on the victim "enjoying it" in the end (pun intended, lol); in every other way, it was totally objectionable.

It turned out much more rapey than I was thinking it would, and there was another person involved who was basically victimized for no good reason: psychologically abused, though not physically. In the final analysis, I didn't like the story. And if I don't like it, it doesn't get posted.

 

[Voboy]

Worth noting, too, that sometimes we don't know we have kinks until we write them. I had no idea I'd like vampire or werewolf stories until I wrote some.

 

[TarnishedPenny]

Oh, absolutely. When I started writing here, I set myself the goal of writing at least one tale in each category. That plan has gone by the wayside, but along the way I got to investigate all kinds of things which didn't particularly light my personal fuse.

 

[Blind_Justice]

As a Fantasy/Sci-Fi writer, I'm usually working within the frame of a larger plot and most of the time, if my stories have sex, it's in service to the plot. On occasion I manage to sneak some of my own kinks into the story, but more often than not stuff happens (some of) my characters want/need which leaves me cold and/or disgusted. In that regard I envy the people who "just" write what gets them horny. Heck, I envy the people who can write anything at this point. How do you write a story again?

 

[ElectricBlue]

Oh, absolutely. When I started writing here, I set myself the goal of writing at least one tale in each category. That plan has gone by the wayside, but along the way I got to investigate all kinds of things which didn't particularly light my personal fuse.

Catch up .

Something for Everyone

It's only 6k words.

Other than that, writing a kink that you're not even a little bit curious about seems like a waste of time to me. Why would you bother? I reckon you're better off just being a "little bit perverted", not a raging kink Meister. That way the whole thing happens naturally, and you don't have to strain.

Intriguing the number of folk who can't imagine writing MM. I had a bi-sexual beta reader at one point who said I wrote giving head better than he could, which made me laugh, coz I've only ever had one cock in my mouth and that's my own. Damn near broke my back, but an eighteen year old boy is going to try anything once.

My literary experiment though, was to write a story where a key sexual encounter was MM rather than MF, which it easily could have been, just to see the readers' reaction. I reckon about 0.50 a point, scores wise, and this rather endearing comment:

You captured the essence of the genre so well! I found it a bit much with the male bisexual element though. Not my cup of tea. The rest - well what can I say? This was well written, on point, and certainly captivating. The attention to detail and idiomatic descriptors were so Spillane! Another five stars.

When It's Safe to Die

 

[KittyOfSteele]

I'm experimental, so I like to explore and write about kinks that I don't share with others from time to time... However, there are a few categories on Literotica that will always be out of the question for me:

• Loving Wives. I don't have that kink (I'm not precisely monogamous, but cheating is a breach of trust that I personally find unforgiveable), but I did get into the psychology behind it, and I started to feel more empathetic about it. That's the whole reason I don't want to put anything in that category; not because of the vitriol, but rather it's just that the focus there seems too much into the act of non-consensual cheating instead of polyamory, or at least is my perception. The vitriol just discourages me further. Yes, I do want to offend, but the key is offending the right people, and LW readers are not the people I have my eyes upon.
• Gay Male. I can't, for the life of me, write MM couples. They always end up TG+TG because I freeze at the blank page, my dysphoria gets triggered, and it just depresses me immediately. Nothing against the category, it's a personal thing, and GM won't be missing my work anyday, so I'm cool with others writing in it. If someone ends up requesting me something for GM, I'd rather refer them to an author that has a similar style to mine instead.
• Interracial Love. Here's why: I come from a country that is so diverse we stopped having racial issues during the early 1800s, and even before that. We are all so mixed that it's not strange to see families where everyone is of a different skin color. What many consider a kink, I just see it as a day-to-day reality. Sure, people do have their preferences, but it's not exactly fetishized in the majority of cases. I do get why it's a kink for many, but I don't share it because it's my day-to-day reality!

Nevertheless, I think I am able to write NC/R, I/T, and MC. NC/R is probably the one I might end up being the easier, for I've wrote CNC before. I/T is one exercise that I want to try writing about, and MC I... don't understand it much, but I think it's because I'm taking the words "Mind Control" too literally so I always default into the hypnosis cliches, and fantasy or sci-fi settings.

 

[Bramblethorn]

I have a scene which is kind of food fetish, but I'm not sure it counts; it's more about one character working through her anger about a specific childhood bullying incident, which happened to involve cake, rather than either party having a food kink per se.

Probably the closest I've come to the spirit of this question is not a kink, but writing a character/secondary narrator whose religious beliefs are very different to my own and trying to do it in a way that's not condescending to those beliefs.

 

[Erozetta]

I was just talking to another writer about this. My latest story is narrated by a man who has a pregnancy / lactation fetish. I won’t bore you with why I decided to write this, aside from a mixture of real world inspiration and my tangled psyche.

My point was, that people often write what turns them on personally (I do too), but do you ever set yourself the challenge of writing about kinks other than your own, as I did with this story?

I said to the other person that I think I understand obsession, and that I can then write the object of that obsession as being something totally different from my own experience.

About half of my stories involve my own kinks and half don't.


My reasoning for writing things I'm not into is curiousity and the challenge of "do I understand this kink well enough to write it, even if it's not my thing?"

Generally, I seem to do okay.

Weirdly, the stories around my own kinks tend to do worse than the ones that feature kinks I'm not into.

 

[AchtungNight]

I don’t really like BDSM, but I wrote it into my God of War fanfic because I thought Kratos would be the sort of guy who might appreciate it and thinking of his paramour as a dominatrix was hot. I also really like the game series in question and that evened things out as far as disliking the kink. The story has gotten high praise, so I think I did well.

Other times, I have avoided the kinks I don’t like- nothing to even things out or make the story better. Not mentioning the few poorly rated stories that have made it out and not earned praise.

 

[JenniferSmithJones]

Myself, I can't stand the romance genre. Yeah, I'm a woman who finds them no fun. Overly wordy, toned down sexuality, it's like watered dopwn cold coffee. That's been out for two days and is so oxidized you could charge a battery with it.

But once upon a time in a writing class, we were asked at the beginning what genre we liked least. Then as an exercise, they told us to write 750 words in that genre. Dammit. I got Romance. SO I took a sci-fi character who was turning observatory telescopes into a giant laser, and showing a bunch of high-school kids how easy it to do that. I took that scene, and just ended every paragraph with an unanswerable question. Such as:

"He was probably going to get thrown in prison for this. What made him think it was ok to teach kids how to make lasers out of telescopes? But clearly, you could see he loved teaching kids about lethal optics and their applications. And the kids were loving it! That couldn't be all bad, could it? What would her parents think of him if she introduced him to them? Daddy liked men who displayed decisive leadership, but Mom was dead-set against shooting down airliners with lasers on moral grounds. Even if they were terrorist airliners. If he did get thrown in prison, were children entirely out of the picture? Could their relationship survive? Would it actually be better, for the world, if he were thrown in prison?"

There was a lot more, but you get the idea. The instructors loved it. Haven't been able to sell it to anyone.

 

[LittleGreene]

I like this discussion.
As a female that has written quite a lot from the male perspective I think being ‘fresh’ to a subject or point of view offers a creative freedom that maybe you don’t get when you are heavily invested in that activity or angle.
I’ve really enjoyed exploring Lit to give me a new understating of various kinks. Gyro shes. Desires that I’m going to bring into futures stories. Some have actually become a new interest in the real world, others are purely for mental stimulation .

 

[M_K_Babalon]

Many of us, if not most, write from both male and female perspectives. @StillStunned writes beautifully from the female perspective. I prefer his writings there. So we have to be able to describe sex that is not what we directly experience. Some of that is challenging, I was happy when I got a comment about a group sex scene that it reminded them of their own experiences, which was nice, because I have never been involved in anything like that.

But some things give me enough of a cringe factor that I cannot or will not write them. I/T and NC/R are my sharpest lines. Not sure I could do water sports or anything like that. I just don't get degrading in general.

Watersports is about pee. It doesn't need to be degrading.

 

[iwatchus]

Watersports is about pee. It doesn't need to be degrading.

I know what it is mechanically. I guess I just don't get it. Which is why I won't write it.

 

[M_K_Babalon]

I know what it is mechanically. I guess I just don't get it. Which is why I won't write it.

I get that. I'm into it, and I couldn't tell you why.

 

[OddLove]

If I'm neutral about a kind of kink, fetish, or dynamic, or sexuality, it can be a fun challenge to write characters who enjoy those things. As long as it's not such a major turn off that I find it repulsive.

 

[M_K_Babalon]

I don't think I've written kinks I don't like, but I know I could probably write them, even the few I really don't like.

 

[NuclearFairy]

About half of my stories involve my own kinks and half don't.


My reasoning for writing things I'm not into is curiousity and the challenge of "do I understand this kink well enough to write it, even if it's not my thing?"

Generally, I seem to do okay.

Weirdly, the stories around my own kinks tend to do worse than the ones that feature kinks I'm not into.

That's probably for the same reason that a math genius makes a terrible math teacher.

You get the kinks you're into and so you don't have to think about them and how they make the character feel to write it. It flows, and it feels good. Whereas a kink you're not into, it takes far more thought to work out how to convey that in a stimulating way, and quite possibly more research into what exactly that kink is and how it works.

 

[Bamagan]

Nudging this thread because I was dabbling on an old WIP and had some relevant thoughts. The actual kinks in the story aren't about a foot fetish, but I'm going to use that as an example so that I can preface my serious remarks with a joke about putting yourself in the foot fetishist's shoes.

I am neutral about feet sexually. I understand, in a kind of clinical sense, that for some people they are erogenous zones. That doesn't necessarily mean having characters engage in foot rubs or pedicures or toe-sucking will trigger sexy thoughts for people whose feet are part of their love-play, although they might find it easier to empathize with the characters than others do. But if I'm going to include some shenanigans that I hope will appeal to such fetishists, what's the trick (or what's the best practice, if you think the word 'trick' is disrespectful) for doing so?

My writing style tends to be sparse on static descriptions, of characters or settings. If I'm writing a fetish piece/scene I try to add details that I would normally not bother with. In this example, the POV character might pay special attention to feet, shoes, the way a person stands, and so forth. It can serve as foreshadowing or characterization from a story perspective. When it gets to the sexy parts I usually don't make any particular attempt to explain why the character loves feet, because I'm not an ambassador for podophilia*. My hope is that providing the appropriate details, without making it seem aberrant and without letting it dominate the scene (unless that happens to be the point), will be enough for the ones who have the kink. If they already love feet, perhaps they will enjoy a faithful description as long as it doesn't seem like pandering or crass product placement (why foreshadowing/characterization helps!). If someone else reads it and finds it sexy, so much the better.

I'll close with another joke. I should obviously put a toe-loving tale about getting off on the right foot in Fetish, but if they get off on the wrong foot, should it go in R/NC or Erotic Horror instead?

*Footer: I had to be very careful with autocorrect on that!

 

[FrancesScott]

The actual kinks in the story aren't about a foot fetish, but I'm going to use that as an example so that I can preface my serious remarks with a joke about putting yourself in the foot fetishist's shoes.

I don’t have any sort of foot fetish IRL, but I used to read some foot fetish stories here that were so well written and so evocative that I began to feel I understood the kink just a little.

 

[FrancesScott]

I don’t have any sort of foot fetish IRL, but I used to read some foot fetish stories here that were so well written and so evocative that I began to feel I understood the kink just a little.

At the end of the day, the feelings associated with a kink are probably somewhat analogous to any other kink, it’s just the thing that causes those feelings that varies.

And the author’s own arousal came through loud and clear, which I found sexy.

 

[SimonDoom]

Absolutely, yes. To me, it's part of the fun of being a writer.

I have never, in my life, had incestuous impulses. No interest whatsoever. But I have long enjoyed the stories, and I enjoy writing them, and I've had significant success as a writer of incest stories. I've never had a reader tell me "I can tell you're not really into it."

I'm not gay, but I'd like to write a gay male story, and I think it would be enjoyable to do so. I like the idea of the challenge.

I'm definitely of the opinion that if you are a writer, you can write anything. Your personal interests and background are not limits.

 

[FrancesScott]

Your personal interests and background are not limits.

I have to have some connection to what I am writing. Maybe not direct. Perhaps a connection to something I can use to ‘feel’ what a protagonist might be feeling without actually having experienced it myself.

To go back to my guy with a pregnancy / lactation fetish. I’ve never been attracted to pregnant women (nor repelled, but I tend to have more protective feelings if anything). But I’ve been attracted to things about both men and women, and it’s a case of extrapolating. I’m guessing writing gay male might be the same sort of thing. I’m happy writing straight male narrators, and straight / bi / lesbian female narrators, so how big a leap is it really?

 

[ElectricBlue]

I'm not gay, but I'd like to write a gay male story, and I think it would be enjoyable to do so. I like the idea of the challenge.

I'm definitely of the opinion that if you are a writer, you can write anything. Your personal interests and background are not limits.

I get the writers' challenge bit, but I don't get the, "I'll try that to see if I can," approach. What's the point if you're not tickling your own fancy? Seems like a waste of time to me. I mean, every hot woman in her forties doesn't need to be your mom, and Dad's not the only one who knows how to drive .