Appointment with a new doctor

[Ciceri]

Tomorrow I meet my new doctor. My new plan began i n January and my scheduled visit is finally happening. I haven't been to the doctor since before Covid and I'm a little nervous. I have permanent whip marks on my upper back, buttocks and legs. I was whipped regularly for several years and although the marks are very light now, it's still visible. I often bled from the leather and wire cords. I don't mind this as it brings back good memories but I am nervous about this going on my medical record. What should I say to this doctor if she asks? I don't want this being associated with anything like self-harm or a risky lifestyle (I had been with another man). What is YOUR advice to me?

 

[Ched21]

Tell the truth

 

[Ash999]

Can you open up to this new Doc: R U nervous about coming out to her??

 

[IrisAlthea]

I think it depends a lot on where you are in the world and what the possible outcome could be.
The ideal is being open and honest with your doctor, but there are places where this would be a bad idea.

 

[lowcollar]

It would depend on the doctor and how open minded they seem. For example, even through people who are into bdsm are often more mentally healthy (stastically speaking according to Psychology today), than those that don't; still many therapists consider it abuse.

 

[ChuckWolf]

Just say that your frat hazing went a little too far.

 

[cascadiabound]

How did it go?

 

[Boat1]

Tomorrow I meet my new doctor. My new plan began i n January and my scheduled visit is finally happening. I haven't been to the doctor since before Covid and I'm a little nervous. I have permanent whip marks on my upper back, buttocks and legs. I was whipped regularly for several years and although the marks are very light now, it's still visible. I often bled from the leather and wire cords. I don't mind this as it brings back good memories but I am nervous about this going on my medical record. What should I say to this doctor if she asks? I don't want this being associated with anything like self-harm or a risky lifestyle (I had been with another man). What is YOUR advice to me?

You fell from/through a tree and the branches did it...
Or do what I do, carry cash to pay out of pocket and if you don't like what the Dr writes down, physically take your paperwork from the Dr, inform them that this visit never happened and pay 'em cash for their time...

On paper, I'm as pure as the Lilly White, driven snow... I have to be.

 

[Goldenfinger]

I’m on the tell the truth camp. It might be hard for you but it’s your health and they should have all the information to help you. My Dr is apart of the community and we first met her at a munch. Then when looking for a Dr she worked at the facility I would be using. My wife talked to her and she said she would be my GP. It’s great, it really is because she knows everything and has geared my care to our lifestyle.

 

[flameinsidesoul]

If I can offer a perspective: your doctor’s role is to care for your health, not judge your life. But unfortunately, bias still exists—especially when it comes to misunderstood lifestyles like BDSM.

My advice?
Be strategically honest. Say the marks are “from past consensual activities with a partner.” Keep it simple. You owe no detailed explanation unless it directly impacts your current health.

And a reminder to everyone reading:
Your kinks don’t make you broken. They make you brave enough to live your truth in a judgmental world.

 

[Boat1]

If I can offer a perspective: your doctor’s role is to care for your health, not judge your life. But unfortunately, bias still exists—especially when it comes to misunderstood lifestyles like BDSM.

My advice?
Be strategically honest. Say the marks are “from past consensual activities with a partner.” Keep it simple. You owe no detailed explanation unless it directly impacts your current health.

And a reminder to everyone reading:
Your kinks don’t make you broken. They make you brave enough to live your truth in a judgmental world.

THAT'S PERFECT!

 

[MasterDarcy]

She's going to inquire. And chances are that she'll learn towards the "domestic violence" angle.

We'd all agree that it's none of her business, but she'll also retort by saying that is her business if someone is being physically abused.

I'd actually pre-emp her and say that you have wounds from a consensual relationship and that she should use those exact words when writing it on your records.

That way, ideally, you won't have to explain it to future Doctors. Hopefully.

 

[shewantsmore]

What happens between dr and patient are confidential, if the Dr asked then be honest tell the truth,its part of your lifestyle, they may ask why but i doubt it or may tell you to be careful or give advice but if its not causing you any medical problems then theres no problem

 

[MasterDarcy]

What happens between dr and patient are confidential, if the Dr asked then be honest tell the truth,its part of your lifestyle, they may ask why but i doubt it or may tell you to be careful or give advice but if its not causing you any medical problems then theres no problem

Yes.

The Hippocratic Oath.

It's a pledge taken by physicians, outlining their ethical obligations to patients.

 

[lowcollar]

Yes.

The Hippocratic Oath.

It's a pledge taken by physicians, outlining their ethical obligations to patients.

However, I have had two physicians talk about my health issues with other people without my consent. The AMA will do nothing about it. Also, if your info goes into the computer, it is open season.

 

[MasterDarcy]

However, I have had two physicians talk about my health issues with other people without my consent. The AMA will do nothing about it. Also, if your info goes into the computer, it is open season.

Good points.

And that is horrendous and completely unethical!

I'm sorry you had to deal with that. That's terrible.

 

[abusedsoccermom]

Just say that your frat hazing went a little too far.

More common than you might think

 

[Britva415]

Don't come up with a "plausible lie" like hazing or falling on a fence or getting scratched by a tree. Just tell the truth, or at least enough of it to get them to back down from reporting.

HIPAA or not, doctors are "mandated reporters" in many states, which means that when abuse is suspected, they have to tell someone.

So if you tell them a lie and they somehow later learn that it was a lie, or if they suspect it was a lie, that gives them far more reason to suspect reportable abuse than if you had just told them (some portion of) the truth in the first place.

 

[Easypeter]

I’m shaved smooth all over . My wife asked me to shave my pubic and ass hair . She liked it and asked me to shave my arms, legs and chest . She and I both love it . I went to get a heart cath and the nurse said she had to shave me and she was shocked at me being hairless . The Doctor came in to explain what he would do and he folded the sheet back and I could tell he liked it because he held my cock in his hand and pulled my balls to the side telling me he would be very gentle during the procedure . He was cherishing my cock and I was getting hard . He asked if the nurse shaved me and I told him that I did it and my wife and others liked it . He squeezed my cock and balls as he told me he thought it looked and felt great . Be honest .

 

[Britva415]

she was shocked

What did she do to convey this shock?

He was cherishing my cock

Sounds like they were both pretty unprofessional.

 

[Easypeter]

She took a step back and had the look of surprise . I liked the way he was holding me and making me relax . His bedside manners turned into me fantasizing about what Doctors do to me during the time they put me to sleep .

 

[Dstorage]

A little late to the party here but all you need to do is say "you may see some marks, they were consensual" and leave it at that. Unless you are under psych evaluation after professing self harm you have answered any/all questions they need to ask.

 

[Britva415]

I’m shaved smooth all over . My wife asked me to shave my pubic and ass hair . She liked it and asked me to shave my arms, legs and chest . She and I both love it . I went to get a heart cath and the nurse said she had to shave me and she was shocked at me being hairless . The Doctor came in to explain what he would do and he folded the sheet back and I could tell he liked it because he held my cock in his hand and pulled my balls to the side telling me he would be very gentle during the procedure . He was cherishing my cock and I was getting hard . He asked if the nurse shaved me and I told him that I did it and my wife and others liked it . He squeezed my cock and balls as he told me he thought it looked and felt great . Be honest .

I'm surprised this nurse was more shocked at your already-bare pubes than she was at the doctor openly fondling you in front of her.