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Lilianna23 said:
Maybe not a mistake. Rookie or not. Talk a little longer. See if she will talk on Goofle Meet, Teams, Kik, or one of the various other sites. Talk there a while before you decide to meet. You can determine a lot about a person using other senses. If you both still click, then consider meeting casually.
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Yeah I think that's a good idea.

Online chatting i've discovered very easily allows you to see only certain aspects of people. Not just because they might not choose to say certain things (like, for example, catfishing). But because when a convo flows you don't really focus on what you might not like to share or hear, or what you might not have in common. Whereas in real life there are those little cues you can pick up on. Plus, it's real life!
 
Lilianna23 said:
You never know what could happen. I believe that things occur as they should. We're not necessarily powerless, however, the universe puts opportunities in our path. We can act on them or not.

I have heard of people falling in love after meeting on this site. I have even heard of marriages. Certainly friendships have been forged here. This thread is a wonderful example of that.

My advice to you is search your heart. Open yourself up to all the possibilities you could imagine from your meeting. Then decide how you want to progress.

Good luck to you, Quim! I wish you every happiness! 🤗💕🤗
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ANd to you. Thank you
 
Quimpossibility said:
I have suggested moving off Lit because the chat architecture is godawful. She doesn't like it because other people behave like assholes. But we haven't finished that conversation and I dont think we're at the swapping phone numbers stage yet :)

I know. That's always in the back of my mind.

Of course

Most of the relationships of others I've known have formed online. Perhaps it's become the norm these days
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Do NOT swap phone numbers unless you are very sure. Use an app that doesn't require you to give out your number.

I know people who have met their SO online. Two of my best girlfriends I met on Twitter. We've never met but we do talk. I've met other friends online as well.

More than 30 years ago I met my husband through the personals. The internet was not in use then.

I tell you this so you know the possibility exists.
 
Sprocketman74 said:
I think there are so many that would like authentic, honest online connections, but it's tough. Speaking personally, I get turned on sometimes and sink into perversion, whereas I would not do that with someone I was looking at likely.
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But what a lovely serendipity when your perversions matches theirs!
 
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Quimpossibility said:
I have done cybersex, I mean it's basically two people talking dirty to each other to masturbate to.

She and I have done that. OUr first chat ended taht way. It wasn't planned or expected. We were just goofing around and it just ended in sexy talk and felt a lot of fun, all things considered. She said she enjoyed it too and we chatted ever since, not always ending that way. Now talk has moved on to a somewhat deeper level.

I really don't know. I have allowed myself to be honest and vulnerable so hurt is a very likely outcome. That will only be mitigated through straight talking and honesty. She asked me some stuff about myself that, had I lied about, would have led to a somewhat different outcome and possibly relationship. I don't like lying. I am not comfortable with it, but somtimes it can be the more better option.
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But then there's the possibility that you'll be found out if the relationship deepens. I would tell you to be yourself. If she doesn't like that person, the relationship is doomed anyway. You just find out sooner and invest less to do so.
 
Mittering said:
I'm replying to this without reading what everyone else has written first

Take the pressure of letting you down off. Plan something fun to do that you would absolutely do by yourself. Let her know that is your plan. Let her know that she is more than welcome to join you at that activity but that regardless of her attendance, you have plans. Let her know that if she doesn't show up that she will not be leaving you hanging. You will not be disappointed or put out or in inconvenienced.

My two cents...or less.
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That sounds like a great way to go.
 
subdudeme13 said:
Happy Sunday morning everyone. Hope all had a great start to the weekend. It was hot as blazes here yesterday, well maybe not that hot but hot. When I went outside the first thing I wasted to do was turn around and come back inside. The water temperature in the Gulf is 83F so it is warm enough for these old bones to jump into.
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Our water NEVER gets that warm! At the height of summer, the best we can hope for is low 70s. 🥶
 
subdudeme13 said:
I recall being in basic training in the Air Force in San Antonio in Sept. It was hot and there were days we did not train outside because of the heat. We had guys falling over during PT from the heat. The DI told us the best thing to do was drink a hot cup of coffee and that would cause you to sweat more and cool you down. We
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My parents met in San Antonio. They were both drill sergeants in the AF.
 
Lilianna23 said:
But then there's the possibility that you'll be found out if the relationship deepens. I would tell you to be yourself. If she doesn't like that person, the relationship is doomed anyway. You just find out sooner and invest less to do so.
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Yes exactly.

TBH, im kinda wondering if the practicalities of it might be too much anyway. She's not that far from me at all, about 100 miles at a guess. I don't know her exact location, but near enough. That's not a huge distance, but it still requires a train journey or a drive (i dont drive).

I think for the moment I'm going to chill out and see what she says. initially it was provoked by her saying she'd like to have sex. But on reflection I feel kinda sleazy asking to meet on that basis.
 
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