Should men expect monogamy from women?

[Islander55]

I do not think monogamy is natural to most people, men or women. You can suppress your desires for variety but I do not think that is healthy.

 

[Celand]

It is genetics and nature... Males are polygamous across all species, females monogamous.

 

[Davidwa1]

It is genetics and nature... Males are polygamous across all species, females monogamous.

I think it depends on the individual more than just a male female thing.

 

[LMWM321]

It is genetics and nature... Males are polygamous across all species, females monogamous.

Couldn't disagree more. I think women are actually LESS naturally monogamous. But they are also not as sex-driven. So, they can put sex on the shelf more easily than men if they become bored with a partner

As to the questions of whether or not men should expect monogamy? Yes, if that is the agreement within the relationship. But after many years have gone by, continuing to expect this may have the unintended consequence of squelching her interest in sex altogether - including sex with the man imposing this expectation.

 

[Celand]

OK guys if you do not believe in genetics, then how about nature and biology ?

 

[Mike302]

It is genetics and nature... Males are polygamous across all species, females monogamous.

That's completely untrue.

 

[4yourpleasureiam]

Women deserve to have whomever as often and whoever they desire. Men should be happy to support their wives.

 

[Britva415]

OK guys if you do not believe in genetics, then how about nature and biology ?

It’s false, though. There is no one single way for “all species.”

 

[GoodnessO]

It is genetics and nature... Males are polygamous across all species, females monogamous.

Surely you gest.

 

[BiggDogg91]

The average woman, currently attached or not, turns down sex far more than the average man. They are simply more desired for sex.

Most men have to put quite a bit more effort into getting sex elsewhere, and if the woman they are with is taking care of him, and she should, it's not hard for him to stay "faithful".

When women give in to man's advances, or purposefully seek it out, the majority of men they are attached to can't deal with it and end the relationship. This results in divorce, financial hardship, and many other negative things.

I wish my Dad would have stayed with my mother and his kids when she had an affair. Moving out of the home, visitations, being a latch-key kid, and all kinds of troubles resulted. She married her affair partner, who turned out to be an alcoholic, so I got to live with that. That led to another affair, divorce, and another marriage. All before I moved out as an adult.

When I consider what I went through and other people I know with similar stories, alot of heartache and struggle would have been prevented if our Dads would have just stayed married and worked on themselves and relationship with their wives than just bailing on the family.

Watching and reading videos and comments / discussions regarding this on YT and such It seems to me men and their families would do better long-term to work harder on their relationship before and after, if the woman steps out. I think the "zero tolerance" many men have for women having sex with anyone but them for their entire lives is ridiculous and unrealistic. The issue is more minimized when there are no children involved.

The question is: Should men expect monogamy from women?

Yes men should expect monogamy from women and women should expect monogamy from men.

 

[GoodnessO]

Monogomy. I think that mean sex exclusively with 1 person. So if it happens that you're no longer having sex with that person, because they've become unable, or uninterested for whatever reasons... then what? Aren't you really no longer monogamous with that 1 person, because you're no longer having sex together?

 

[Bottomlover]

Monogomy. I think that mean sex exclusively with 1 person. So if it happens that you're no longer having sex with that person, because they've become unable, or uninterested for whatever reasons... then what? Aren't you really no longer monogamous with that 1 person, because you're no longer having sex together?

I expect and also stick to whatever parameters you and your partner agreed to. I prefer monogamy, but if one of our preferences,changes, I expect an adult conversation. For me, being dumped is preferable to being betrayed. I might be OK with alternate arrangements if discussed and agreed upon, but I have never and will never tolerate cheating.

I'm old, and have learned that having the conversation to set parameters at the beginning is absolutely essential to a relationship. In my many years, I've had flings between relationships in which neither of us expected an ongoing relationship or monogamy, but have not and will not betray a partner's trust. Maybe I'm a dinosaur.

If a partner becomes uninterested in sex, it's time for a conversation. If something can't be worked out, you have to make a conscious decision to either accept it or move on, but be honest with your partner. It's not easy, but honesty is much better for everyone's mental health.

 

[Britva415]

Monogomy. I think that mean sex exclusively with 1 person. So if it happens that you're no longer having sex with that person, because they've become unable, or uninterested for whatever reasons... then what? Aren't you really no longer monogamous with that 1 person, because you're no longer having sex together?

That's what I call the expectation of "zerogamy."

You can't have it with me, and you can't have it with anyone else either.

 

[Celand]

Surely you gest.

No, I am deadly serious. It is not in gest, only if you believe in unicorns and fairies. The end of western civilisation will occur precisely because the society is abandoning " facts of nature".

I also know and respect history not only in Sweden ( although Sweden is already lost) but everywhere in the Western world

https://steemitimages.com/DQmULV5cvCRBrHwVwJMT1ghwi4Gu9gKZUopjGASCrrF1SF8/14883461_1462042477141815_3098514904900859427_o.jpg

 

[Otis_Ravelli]

No, I am deadly serious. It is not in gest, only if you believe in unicorns and fairies. The end of western civilisation will occur precisely because the society is abandoning " facts of nature".

I also know and respect history not only in Sweden ( although Sweden is already lost) but everywhere in the Western world

https://steemitimages.com/DQmULV5cvCRBrHwVwJMT1ghwi4Gu9gKZUopjGASCrrF1SF8/14883461_1462042477141815_3098514904900859427_o.jpg

You do realise that the picture on the left isn't a photo from 1016 right? The man in the left hand picture is Travis Fimmel who is actually Australian and playing a the part of a Norwegian Viking in that photo so what has to do with Sweedish men is beyond me. Both of those dudes existed at the same time in 2016.

Usually people who use "facts of nature" know nothing about nature or what constitutes a fact.

 

[MaturemanAJ]

I can only speak from experiences that I have had. My wife was arrested previously and he cheated on her he definitely was no looker but sheis very sexy. Needless to say she ended up in my bed. In our marriage we have swapped with other couples but it has always come down to my wife just doesn't have the libido that I do.

She has told me numerous times she willl never be enough for me but with that said she hasn't come right out and told me go ahead and enjoy other women. She gave her bestie the green light and her and I over the years have gotten together.

My wife enjoys other women looking at me, hitting on me and pretty sure she shows girlfriends nude pictures of me.

Men hit on her especially friends do which is fine by me. I am in the crowd of monogamy just wasn’t meant to be a lifelong commitment.

 

[GoodnessO]

It is genetics and nature... Males are polygamous across all species, females monogamous.

I can't say about all species, but females are the ones who "cheat" among some bird species, such as Robins. And the elephant in the room... female humans are definitely not monogamous.

 

[Celand]

You do realise that the picture on the left isn't a photo from 1016 right? The man in the left hand picture is Travis Fimmel who is actually Australian and playing a the part of a Norwegian Viking in that photo so what has to do with Sweedish men is beyond me. Both of those dudes existed at the same time in 2016.

Usually people who use "facts of nature" know nothing about nature or what constitutes a fact.

Unless somebody invented photography in 11th century and I just discovered it in my post, then the picture meant to indicate a warrior class of male and a picture of "it" ( pronoun) representing the new generation of beta males....

If you want a real and current examples then lookie here:

https://images.fineartamerica.com/images-medium-large-5/50-green-berets-us-army-special-forces-oleg-zabielin.jpghttps://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/10/2023/12/231213-Pinkwashing-01-KQED-800x533.jpg

 

[Celand]

I can't say about all species, but females are the ones who "cheat" among some bird species, such as Robins. And the elephant in the room... female humans are definitely not monogamous.

I have never said that it is exclusive, there are exceptions to every rule. Maybe I should have said: Men are GENERALLY polygamous and women are GENERALLY monogamous. There is a great amount of precedents in humans to confirm my theory.

 

[stxjimmy]

I'm not sure you can expect anything from another autonomous human being. You can try to establish rules in a relationship, but rules are made to he broken.

Rules aren’t made to be broken.
Clearly it happens but that’s not the rationale behind them.

 

[stxjimmy]

Couldn't disagree more. I think women are actually LESS naturally monogamous. But they are also not as sex-driven. So, they can put sex on the shelf more easily than men if they become bored with a partner

As to the questions of whether or not men should expect monogamy? Yes, if that is the agreement within the relationship. But after many years have gone by, continuing to expect this may have the unintended consequence of squelching her interest in sex altogether - including sex with the man imposing this expectation.

Think monogamy is a reasonable expectation in a relationship until/unless discussed otherwise.

 

[Otis_Ravelli]

Unless somebody invented photography in 11th century and I just discovered it in my post, then the picture meant to indicate a warrior class of male and a picture of "it" ( pronoun) representing the new generation of beta males....

If you want a real and current examples then lookie here:

https://images.fineartamerica.com/images-medium-large-5/50-green-berets-us-army-special-forces-oleg-zabielin.jpghttps://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/10/2023/12/231213-Pinkwashing-01-KQED-800x533.jpg

This is ridiculous, you are ridiculous.

 

[LMWM321]

I have never said that it is exclusive, there are exceptions to every rule. Maybe I should have said: Men are GENERALLY polygamous and women are GENERALLY monogamous. There is a great amount of precedents in humans to confirm my theory.

You would be 100% correct if you weren't 100% wrong.

Women are not GENERALLY monogamous by nature. But they ARE far less apt to act on their desires for sexual variety because men are something like 30% larger, 50% stronger and 5-times more likely to react violently to her having sex outside of the relationship. And judging from your grotesque posts, you may be closer to 10-times. So yeah, any woman in your life is probably not going to be very honest about her desires. It obviously wouldn't end well.

BTW, female chimpanzees are NOT monogamous. ..Not by a mile. And they are arguably our nearest genetic relative. So.. there's that.

 

[KinkStevens]

The average woman, currently attached or not, turns down sex far more than the average man. They are simply more desired for sex.

Most men have to put quite a bit more effort into getting sex elsewhere, and if the woman they are with is taking care of him, and she should, it's not hard for him to stay "faithful".

When women give in to man's advances, or purposefully seek it out, the majority of men they are attached to can't deal with it and end the relationship. This results in divorce, financial hardship, and many other negative things.

I wish my Dad would have stayed with my mother and his kids when she had an affair. Moving out of the home, visitations, being a latch-key kid, and all kinds of troubles resulted. She married her affair partner, who turned out to be an alcoholic, so I got to live with that. That led to another affair, divorce, and another marriage. All before I moved out as an adult.

When I consider what I went through and other people I know with similar stories, alot of heartache and struggle would have been prevented if our Dads would have just stayed married and worked on themselves and relationship with their wives than just bailing on the family.

Watching and reading videos and comments / discussions regarding this on YT and such It seems to me men and their families would do better long-term to work harder on their relationship before and after, if the woman steps out. I think the "zero tolerance" many men have for women having sex with anyone but them for their entire lives is ridiculous and unrealistic. The issue is more minimized when there are no children involved.

The question is: Should men expect monogamy from women?

Answer: It depends on the woman and the expressed commitment you both made. If she hasn’t clearly stated one way or the other then no. People emotionally and physically connect with whoever they want to.

 

[gtnlynn]

It depends on the woman. When we were dating in college and were able to see each other only once or twice a month, my wife was free to date others. She dated and had sex with several other men until we decided that she would only be with me. She needed that sexual release with others. After a few years of monogamous marriage, we talked about all the sexual attention she was getting from other men and decided she could be free to have sex (one time only with each man) to enjoy variety. She did enjoy it briefly and then decided that it would stop. It was her decision, and she has not been with anyone else for over 25 years.