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Is the biggest cock the top?

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Escierto

Literotica Guru
Joined
May 19, 2020
Posts
4,339
My girlfriend has told me more than once that the person with the biggest cock is entitled to be the top. Of course she would think so since she has a big cock.

Does her argument have any merit? Is there a psychological advantage to having a big cock that makes someone want to top the person with the smaller cock? Or does the person with the smaller cock acquiesce at the sight of a bigger cock and bend over meekly for their fucking?

When I see her cock I automatically want to bend over or open my mouth but maybe that's just me. Or is it the size? Is there such a thing as Big Dick Energy?
 
Escierto said:
My girlfriend has told me more than once that the person with the biggest cock is entitled to be the top. Of course she would think so since she has a big cock.

Does her argument have any merit? Is there a psychological advantage to having a big cock that makes someone want to top the person with the smaller cock? Or does the person with the smaller cock acquiesce at the sight of a bigger cock and bend over meekly for their fucking?

When I see her cock I automatically want to bend over or open my mouth but maybe that's just me. Or is it the size? Is there such a thing as Big Dick Energy?
Click to expand...
She's wrong. Position isn't about size. I'm just average, but I never ever liked bottoming. I was suckered into bottoming when I was young and new at m2m sex. Not because I was anxious to try it, but because the guys I ran into had this attitude large ones glide, everybody else pokes. I wondered if I was meant to be straight because I found m2m sex miserable and very unsatisfying. Then about 2 years into m2m sex journey, I FINALLY met a guy who let me top him. It was the very first time I realized just how fantastic m2m sex could actually be. For me it is more of an orientation than a position. I want to be inside a man as if men could sire kids just like a woman. That is my only gender bending attitude: I crave a manly man, yet I want him to LOVE everything about children. Sometimes I see myself as siring kids with such a man, sometimes I see myself as the son yearning for a dad's love. I'll never understand why, it is just how I'm wired...

Note I had some of my own biases too about position. I remember talking to another guy in a gay bar years ago. He said he was a bottom. However, when he also said that he was VERY hung himself, I turned him down. He told me that if he only bottomed with guys hung bigger than himself, then he pretty much would have been an anal bottom virgin. That was a lesson I needed to here. There are hung bottoms, average bottoms, and small bottoms -- just like there are hung tops, average tops, and small tops. The world is FULL of variety.

Keep in mind too that as you know it really boils down to someone you both care about and am compatible with -- need I say love? I'm now a failed top with my ED, but my partner loves me past my ED. Just like I know in my heart that if he was the one who had medical issues for which he could no longer bottom, I would have stuck with him. I think that is what we are all looking for if we are truly honest: Love trumps even great sex - always!!!
 
none2_none2 said:
She's wrong. Position isn't about size. I'm just average, but I never ever liked bottoming. I was suckered into bottoming when I was young and new at m2m sex. Not because I was anxious to try it, but because the guys I ran into had this attitude large ones glide, everybody else pokes. I wondered if I was meant to be straight because I found m2m sex miserable and very unsatisfying. Then about 2 years into m2m sex journey, I FINALLY met a guy who let me top him. It was the very first time I realized just how fantastic m2m sex could actually be. For me it is more of an orientation than a position. I want to be inside a man as if men could sire kids just like a woman. That is my only gender bending attitude: I crave a manly man, yet I want him to LOVE everything about children. Sometimes I see myself as siring kids with such a man, sometimes I see myself as the son yearning for a dad's love. I'll never understand why, it is just how I'm wired...

Note I had some of my own biases too about position. I remember talking to another guy in a gay bar years ago. He said he was a bottom. However, when he also said that he was VERY hung himself, I turned him down. He told me that if he only bottomed with guys hung bigger than himself, then he pretty much would have been an anal bottom virgin. That was a lesson I needed to here. There are hung bottoms, average bottoms, and small bottoms -- just like there are hung tops, average tops, and small tops. The world is FULL of variety.

Keep in mind too that as you know it really boils down to someone you both care about and am compatible with -- need I say love? I'm now a failed top with my ED, but my partner loves me past my ED. Just like I know in my heart that if he was the one who had medical issues for which he could no longer bottom, I would have stuck with him. I think that is what we are all looking for if we are truly honest: Love trumps even great sex - always!!!
Click to expand...
DFranklin94's response is very well stated. My first was with a smaller Vietnamese man. While my stories don't exactly reflect the experience, it wasn't his size that mattered, but his assertiveness - in the instance, he was truly the man. I can't speak for other men, but for me, it reflects my inner wiring - I have no desire to top but only to bottom. There's something about submitting and receiving that lies at the center of my sexuality at least in the bedroom. Sex is so much in the head in my opinion. I'm not sure why I'm so wired but it's just ME.
 
Escierto said:
My girlfriend has told me more than once that the person with the biggest cock is entitled to be the top. Of course she would think so since she has a big cock.

Does her argument have any merit? Is there a psychological advantage to having a big cock that makes someone want to top the person with the smaller cock? Or does the person with the smaller cock acquiesce at the sight of a bigger cock and bend over meekly for their fucking?

When I see her cock I automatically want to bend over or open my mouth but maybe that's just me. Or is it the size? Is there such a thing as Big Dick Energy?
Click to expand...
I would think that is the case, but I have chatted with some men that say they are bottoms, but have the most amazing large cocks!!
 
Escierto said:
My girlfriend has told me more than once that the person with the biggest cock is entitled to be the top. Of course she would think so since she has a big cock.

Does her argument have any merit? Is there a psychological advantage to having a big cock that makes someone want to top the person with the smaller cock? Or does the person with the smaller cock acquiesce at the sight of a bigger cock and bend over meekly for their fucking?

When I see her cock I automatically want to bend over or open my mouth but maybe that's just me. Or is it the size? Is there such a thing as Big Dick Energy?
Click to expand...

I don't buy into the idea of big dick energy at all. I think top/bottom roles happen naturally and are down to personality (mine happens to be either greedy or indecisive, take your pick, so I'm a very contented switch 🤣)
 
In my fantasies I want a partner with a big cock for me to suck, but I also want to fuck my big cock lover. It would be so hot to slide into him missionary style and play with his cock as we fuck.
 
All i know is how I feel. I'm already submissive and 100% bottom guy. If I see a small cock thats hard tho I still just feel .. meh. But when I see a big hard cock all I can think of is how much I want to get down on my knees for it. For me personally , there is just something about a big hard cock that makes me want to submit to it. I want to worship it with my mouth and tongue and i want to get down on my hands and knees, face down , ass up and offer my little hole to it.

So yeh, I definitely think there is something to BDE. At least there is for me.
 
betabrad said:
All i know is how I feel. I'm already submissive and 100% bottom guy. If I see a small cock thats hard tho I still just feel .. meh. But when I see a big hard cock all I can think of is how much I want to get down on my knees for it. For me personally , there is just something about a big hard cock that makes me want to submit to it. I want to worship it with my mouth and tongue and i want to get down on my hands and knees, face down , ass up and offer my little hole to it.

So yeh, I definitely think there is something to BDE. At least there is for me.
Click to expand...
I feel the same way. When I see my girl's pulsing throbbing cock so hungry for a sexual release, I am compelled to offer her my holes. It's like being under a spell - mesmerized by that powerful cock - you lose any self control. I want to tell her, please my love, STICK IT IN! NOW!
 
I will say this I am a smaller guy size wise but I consider myself a top guy, I have only for the right person bottomed but that was very infrequent and they had to be a very special person, I have topped guys much larger than I so no I don't think that to be true although I think stereotypical porn you see might make you think the bigger is always the top and smaller always the bottom but at least for me the reality is not that. I have only bottomed for 2 guys and enjoyed one of them but not more than I enjoy topping, he was around 7" and the one I didn't enjoy was a bit larger but I think the reason I enjoyed the one I did was he was a very special person, the one that got away so to say and although he was a bottom guy he did enjoy the occasional topping which I gladly did for him the few times he asked, ah thinking back he was such a special guy!
 
I get that even guys with a big cock can want to be a bottom, but as a guy with a small penis ( I don’t think I should be allowed to call mine a cock), it just feels natural to me that I should be on my knees for a bigger cock. Or on my hands and knees. But that’s just what feels right to me.
 
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