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Taken From: http://www.powdermonster.com/amusing/txt/obscene.php
ABC's - A fairly standard rating system by which all women can be categorized:
A - I'd bang her silly.
B - I'd let her swallow my hot load.
C - I wouldn't fuck her with someone else's dick.
Abe Lincoln - Doggy style sex, Just before you climax, give her a donkey punch, then while she is knocked out, roll her over and jizz all over her chin and face, shave off her pubes, and sprinkle in the beard region of her jizz covered mug.
Access Denied Error - When you and your pal are double-teaming a chick, he's got her from behind, you've got her mouth. Selfishly, he drops his load in her, thus preventing you from using that input later (a.k.a. Blocking the Box, Road Closed Due to Bad Conditions).
Afterburner - Get well-positioned with her. Missionary or doggie works OK, here. JUST as you cum, cut a BIG fart and light it with a match. Good for an extra inch or two.
Airplane Blonde - A blonde who has bleached/dyed her hair but still has a 'black box'.
Airtight - A woman is said to be airtight when her anus, vagina, and mouth are all full of penis.
The Al Bundy - This activity is recommended for every married scum out there who's trying to do the right thing. While out with the boys you realize that you are surrounded by meat melons. To keep your mind off the screaming beaver go up to hottest hole in your grasp and begin to entertain her with your sharp wit. Classic one liners like "say your a toilet" & "put it in your mouth" or the always popular "show me your bush" should quickly win her over. The result is consistently a hearty kick to the nuts... and when you untangle them from your intestine, thank her for saving your lousy marriage.
The Alien (aka "The Shocker") - Two in the Pink and one in the Stink
Alaskan Fire Dragon - Another good take off is one of the angry dragon that is called the Alaskan fire dragon. When a girl is giving you a blowjob, cum in her mouth unexpectedly and plug up her mouth at the same time. Then whisper in her ear "I have syphilis" so she spews it out her nose.
Ambush - Insert your thumb in the pink, your pointer finger in the stink, and try to bust trough the skin inside. - Smalls, Pennsylvania
Anal Boot - An anal boot is when you take a pitcher of beer, everyone spits in it, someone stirs it with their cock and then the mixture is poured through the crack of a man ass into the waiting mouth of the loser of a bet or drinking game.
Anal Seizure - This is when you have finished making love to a woman (in her ass...), busted inside, and she uses her anal reflexes to push out your love gravy.
Angry Dragon - 1) While receiving oral sex from a female, the male pulls out and shoots his load up her nose. The female then snorts to expel the semen from her nasal cavity, henceforth creating the appearance of an "angry dragon". 2) While receiving a blow job, cum in her mouth, right when she's about to swallow, you smack her in the back of the head with a free hand and she'll spew it out her nose, hence the appearance of an "Angry Dragon".
Angry Pirate - This is where you proceed to perform a "Houdini" on a girl. With exquisite aim you launch your load into her eyeball. You then swiftly kick her in the shin and run for the nearest exit. As you look back over your shoulder, it will look like you are being chased by a one eyed, one legged "angry pirate".
Antlers - Wide, flat, flapjack titties that come to a sharp point at the nipples.
The Andretti - When receiving road head, swerve the car left and right. Her weight shifting will enhance the sensation. Risky maneuver, so it's best if done with a toothless cocksucker and a open road.
Arabian Goggles (see also "Ray Bans") - The bizarre act of stretching your scrotum across your lover's face and placing one testicle upon each eye. Voila! Arabian Goggles!
Arabian Goggles with Bad Flavor - Putting your balls in her eye sockets and farting in her face. Can be performed in either direction, good while getting head, even better when getting your salad tossed.
Atomic Nut Drop - You're getting brains from a chick while standing near a window, at least on the 3rd floor. Right as you are about to spurt, you throw her out the window, and proceed to spurt, trying to hit her body three or more stories down
Aussie Kiss - Same as a French Kiss, only you do it "Down Under"
Australian Death Grip - The act of grabbing a woman by the haunches/crotch and staring deeply into her eyes until you're slapped or kissed.
The Avalanche - After a girl gives a really fat guy a Blow Job, he drops his stomach on her head like an avalanche. Smaller guys can give a snowstorm or a flurry.
Baby Rodeo (see also "Butt Rodeo" and "Rodeo Sex") When riding your partner who's about to blow his load, give some good pounding strokes and when he's at the point of no return scream out 'Let's make a baby!'. See how long you can hold on, while he tries to throw you off his erupting cock. One night stands should only be considered for the more advanced rider.
The Bait N' Tackle - The sailors used this one in the old Navy days. Before you go off for a long, lonely voyage, get yourself a tall jar and fill it completely with earthworms. When you get lonely, open the jar and fuck away. The earthworms will provide some slithery stimulation, and your protein load will keep them nicely fed. Gone fishing!
Balloon Knot - Another name for a real tight asshole, which kinda resembles a balloon knot.
Ballsacking - Takes some luck of the gene pool, but if you're able to do it, always great fun. While you are straddling her, take your nutsack and spread it out over her face like pizza dough.
Baltimore Beatdown - When you are banging a chick, you tear off her arms and legs, and so she thus becomes one giant boner. That is, her torso is now and extension of your bone. For added effect, begin punching the chicks torso now propped up on your bone until she pukes. Thus, it is as though the gigantic boner is coming.
The Barbara Bush - Fucking a 93 year old grandmother.
Basted Wick - When a woman forgets she has a tampon in and you pack it deep with a thrust and then cum all over it.
Bate-Rape - Go home and furiously masturbate while thinking about a girl who does not like you, a girl who may feel violated by your lusty thoughts and desires. It becomes Bate-Rape when you inform her about your previous night's masturbatory session.
Bear Claw - A synonym for extremely large pussy lips.
Bearded Lady - This is kinda like the dirty sanchez, except you do it doggy style then get shit all over your unit, and then wipe it across her face to make it look like a beard.
Beef Curtains - The shanked out remains of the labia after being stretched like Play-Doh from an hour or so of jimmy-jam.
Beer Dick - This is what most guys get after a good night of drinking. They tend to fuck anything with a pussy while experiencing beer dick.
Beverly Hills Whiffer - This move is restricted to those women who think they're God's gift to the world. Find a woman of the above description. Take her home and start doggie styling her. When you're about to blow, corkscrew two fingers into her ass, scraping as much shit as you can from her. Pull out your fingers, reach around her head to stick one finger in each nostril. Pull her head back so she can see you while you yell "So, you think your shit don't stink now ?!"
Big Rack Attack - Compulsion that occurs with men in monogamous relationships with chicks with munchkin tits, thus neglecting man's need to fuck/suck massive mammaries. The hunger for huge jugs distorts men's judgment, resulting in cheating with ANYTHING with big cans, i.e. fat chicks, ugly bitches, pre-op transsexuals with implants, etc.
The Big Top - Next time your at a carnival drag out the Fat Lady and a couple of midgets. Take them to the roof of tallest building in the city. Then have that fat ass shave each kickstand completely bald. When she gets done... role the nude little bastards in a ball and position them on each side of you. Stand up straight and start spitting up in the air while yelling "I'm a cock.... I'm a cock". Congratulations you are now the biggest dick in town. Before getting off the roof, FIST the fatty in the can and chuck the midgets off head first. This trick is slightly more fun while wearing a red rubber nose.
Bill Buckner - While receiving head standing up, the girl cuts off your balls and rolls them through your legs.
Bizmark (aka "Clownface", "Jelly Donut", "Strawberry Shortcake", "Strawberry Milkshake") - When a girl is giving you head, right before you blow your load, you pull it out of her mouth and blow it on her face. After you blow your load on her face you punch her in the nose with your free hand. Then you take your hand and smear the blood and seamen together to make the BizMark.
Black Man's Kryptonite - Simply White Women. When you put this stuff out in a crowd, there is always a black man waiting to get his 'nose' dirty.
Blast Zone - While fucking a girl from behind, replace you dick with a stick of dynamite and then proceed to light.
Bloody Mary - When a drunk guy is going down on a girl and without even realizing it after he's done, he realizes Mary was very Bloody.
Bloody Wheelbarrow - Your doing a girl doggie style and then u take her arms from underneath her so her nose hits the floor, then u take her arms and use them as the wheelbarrow handles.
Blow Job - When a male receives oral sex.
Blue Crush - Use this only on a girl you have a crush on, but keeps turning you down. Have a party at ur place, and toward the end of the night, take her to a secluded area of your apartment. Have a cement brick in hand. If performed correctly, she will wake up with a sore ass and a blue contusion on her head, hence your crush is now Blue.
Blumpkin – (see Blumpy) Receiving oral sex while sitting on the toilet
Blumpy – (see Blumpkin) You need to find a real tramp to do this right. It involves having her sucking you off while you are on the shitter.
BobFoc - Body Off “Baywatch”, Face Off “Crimewatch”. Pretty much self explanatory here.
Bone of Contention - A Hard-On that starts an argument, ie. your girlfriend catches you with a stiffy while watching Olympic Figure Skating.
Bonemelter- Any word, deed, object, or person that will deflate a hard cock in 1 second flat. For
example, the sight of your grandma naked is a the original bonemelter.
Boofter (see also "Rusty Trombone") - The anal to the oral. The guy does the girl in her ass then she gives him head.
Boogerhook - Any chick with a ferocious beak, snotlocker, or nose to you laymen!
Boston Red Sock - A condom used during that time of the month.
Boston Steamer - The act of ending a relationship by depositing a steaming pile of feces on the back of a sleeping lover after a night of passion followed by a hasty departure.
Boston Tea Bag Party - When more then one guy takes turns teabagging a girl. Just at point of climaxing it is important to yell "The British Are Coming".
Bottle Rocket - Jizz in a girls beer then let her drink it without knowing about the special treat.
Bowling Ball - When the chick is on top and you're ready to switch positions, let her dismount and quickly reach under her sticking your thumb in her star and index and middle finger in the pink box and throw her off the bed!!
The Brain - When you pull out your sack in a crowded bar and squeeze one ball through the gap created between your thumb and first finger....as the little guy pops out damned if he don't look just like a brain.
Brazilian Flapjack - The act of Blowing one's love sauce on their partners sternum and letting her bake in the sun. The partner will then return later and peel off the cumjack and feed it to the craving slut.
Breakfast at Tiffany's - the act of eating a soft-boiled egg from your girl's pussy.
Breakfast In Bed - When coming across a hot chick sleeping, start jerking off, and before you blow it, throw your cock in her mouth, slap her in the face to wake her up, then bust your load down her throat.
Bridle - While banging a whore doggy style, hook your pinky fingers on either side of her mouth and pull back.
British Pound - When two British men double team a girl. However they must scream "Hail to the Queen" every time they switch positions.
The Bronco - You start by going doggy style and then just when she is really enjoying it, you grab her tits as tight as possible and yell another girls name. This gives you the feeling of riding a wild bronco as she desperately tries to buck you off.
Brown Bagging It - Sometimes you meet a girl with a body like there's no tomorrow but a face like a mangy dog. Don't let that body go to waste and let her hideousness stop you from fucking her though. Just draw the smiley face on a brown paper bag, place it over her head, and fuck away while keeping your composure and piece of mind.
Brown Bag Special - The act of wrapping a girl up or placing her in a burlap sack up to her neck so that she is immobile and her head is sticking out. Straddle her and repeatedly smack her about the face with your limp hog.
Brown Glove - While having sex doggy style, punch her in the kidneys. Her rectum will open quickly where upon you shove it in her ass unlubricated. When you pull out you take part of the rectum with you hence the brown glove.
Brown Necktie - You're about halfway through ass-wrecking a chick, and instead of filling up her keister with your demonseed, you pull out and proceed to tittie fuck her, leaving a brown streak between the funbags.
Brunski - When a man puts his face between a woman's breasts and quickly moves his head back and forth while saying "Brunski" in a very drawn out and exaggerated manner. (There are many other variant names.)
Buckeye (aka "Bullseye") - Whenever a chick is bent over you yell "buckeye" and ram your thumb up their ass.
Budgie's Tongue (see also "The Little man in the Canoe") - Euphamism for the clitoris.
Bukkake - (Japanese derivation) When a naked chick lays in the middle as 15 or more guys jerk off over her and try to all cum at the same time, covering her.
Bullseye (aka "Buckeye") - Whenever a chick is bent over you yell "Bullseye" & ram your thumb in their ass.
The Bullwinkle - The sign given to a friend in hiding while doggie styling' some chick. It is performed by placing both hands over the head, with palms facing out and waving wildly. Can be supplemented by shouting "Hey Rocky." (Make sure to use appropriate Bullwinkle voice tone.)
The Bunny (aka "The Elephant") - A guy takes everything out of his pockets pulls his pockets out so it looks like a pair of ears then un-zips pulls out his snout and has a girl suck away.
Bunny Boiler - An unhinged and overly possessive woman. From the rabbit boiling scene in the film "Fatal Attraction"
Burrito Hick-ups - Pinching out fractionized portions of farts while walking someplace with your date.
The Burrowing Skunk - You take a shit on the floor, then from the doggie style position, just before you cum you shove her face in to the pile of shit and cum down the middle of her back, hence the burrowing skunk.
Butt Rodeo (see also "Rodeo Sex" and "Baby Rodeo") - This is stupid, but it still made us laugh...When you're going at it with a girl, you flip her over real fast, start ramming her in the ass and yell as loud as possible "BUTT RODEO!" You then see how long you can ride her till she tosses ya off!
Butt Slam Jam - The sensational sandwich spread made from the act of anal love. Instructions - Combine healthy portion of KY Jelly and cock into her anal orifice. Mix thoroughly. Chill and serve.
Butter Face - When you see a chick with an awesome body, "but her face", is nasty.
Caged Monkey - Keeping yourself, for whatever reason, from getting any action for a long period of time.
Cajun Hot Stick - Fucking a girl doggy style while chewing tobacco. spit dip juice in the pit of her back, remove dick from snatch, commence to rubbing dick in dip spit, when good and covered insert dip spit covered dick back into the vag and continue fucking.
California Potato Chip - Fuck the hell out of yo bitch, then bust a nut all over her back. Call it a night and then proceed to go to sleep. When you wake in the morning, Peel the hardened Jizz of her back and serve it to her for breakfast.
California Raisins - If you're uncircumcised and pump someone up the ass, these are what you'll find under your foreskin afterwards.
Camel Toe (see also "Moose Knuckle", "The Mumbler", "Ninja Foot") - When a girl's pants are so tight you can make out the outline of her lips.
The Canine Special - Liberally apply peanut butter to your dick and call over the family dog. Lick Ubu lick. Good Dog. Arf!
The Carpet Cleaner - While banging a girl doggy style, tie her arms behind her back, lift up her hips, and run around the room pushing her face first across the carpet. Not recommended with large women.
Card Table - You bang the girl doggie style while play solitaire on her back.
The Carnival (aka "The 18th Ave. Feast") - While your double teaming a girl with your friend, one of you bang her in the pink and the other bangs her in the stink. At the same time pull out of her leaving the condoms inside. Count to 3 and at the same time start peeing out of your pistol and into your balloon. Whoever pops their balloon first wins the dirty stuffed animal.
Cell Block - When your in the shower and you take the removable shower head and stick by your ass and balls and beat off with your other hand.
Charity Fuck - Banging some loser who you have absolutely no interest in whatsoever, purely out of pity
for their pathetic existence.
Charleston Chew - When one of the scheister flick lovin' jokers places saran wrap over the mouth of their partner and poops in the saran wrap in their mouth. Thus creating a wrapped-up chocolaty delight, much in the vane of the candy bar favorite.
Charlotte's Web - Find a girl (it will help if her name is Charlotte), get her naked and have her get on her knees. Then place 8 guys evenly around her in a circle and have them all pleasure themselves to the point that they all cum at once. When they all simultaneously shoot their loads it looks like "Charlottes Web!" – Seven
Cheese Grater - When some bitch with braces gives you a blowjob.
Cherry Slushy - After a "Vaginal Seizure" you have a sweet tooth.
Chia Pet - After applying a Dirty Sanchez, smear Chia seeds across it. Then, put the recipient in restraints, water regularly, and check out the cool green mustache!
Chicken Brickin' - You'll need a live chicken and two bricks. First, fuck the chicken, then, while still mounted, take the two bricks and smash the chicken's head between them. The dying/dead chicken will thrash about for 30 seconds (or more if you're lucky) giving you a one-of-a-kind climax. [Rinse chicken well. Make soup.]
Chief Wahoo - Going down on a girl while she is on the rag. Bite the string and pull it out. Shake your head side to side creating red stripes below your eyes. Now you are a Navajo!
Chili Dog - The extreme act of shitting on your partner's chest then titty fucking her, henceforth the appearance of a "Chili Dog". - Twisted Pete, Ohio
Chilly Willy (aka "Polar Bear", "Snowjob") - Blowjob involving ice cubes.
Chipping For Par - When a girls pussy is so hairy you know you won’t find the hole on the first try.
Chocolate Slushy - After an "Anal Siezure" you have a sweet tooth.
Chocolate Starfish - (see also "Pink Starfish") Another name for the asshole.
Chocolate Pizza - Happily discovering hemorrhoids while eating a shitty brown eye.
Chocolate Pizza Milkshake (added 2/10/02) - Felching somebody with hemorrhoids.
Choda \chòdah\: n, - The sweet spot between a man's asshole and his ballsack.
Choda Fucking - Gay pastime in which a man fucks his partner between his legs and against the choda.
Christmas Turkey Carver - The act of sitting carefully behind your prone partner, inserting three fingers in her vagina, one in her ass, and voraciously pumping your digits in and out, maintaining a perfect L-bend at the elbow, and using only your rotator cuff as a power pivot
The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Taint - Pretending to be a Mormon just so you can impregnate virgins and breed them all out.
Cider Visor - Beer Goggles for the young drinker.
Cinderella - A girl who chokes at the Ball(s)
Circumcision - Kick your girlfriend in the chin when you find her blowing another man.
The Clapper - You're doin her doggystyle ,you rabbit punch her & knock her out & then start smacking her ass, this results in hours of "enlightening" fun if you have the clapper installed on the lights in the room.
Cleveland Steamer - The extreme act of shitting on your partner's chest. (sometimes used as a revenge act).
Cliterature – One handed reading material.
Clitourist - A man who won't stop and ask for directions in bed. ie: "Because of his fouled foreplay, Suzy realized that her new boyfriend was no experienced bedroom traveler, but merely a clitourist."
Clownface (aka "Clownface", "Jelly Donut", "Strawberry Shortcake", "Strawberry Milkshake") - When a girl gives you head and you blow your load all over her mouth. Then you proceed to punch her in the nose and make it bleed. The white mouth and red nose makes her look like a clown, hence the clownface.
Club Sped - Gang banging a retard. For those idiots out there, sped come from special ed.
Cockroft - When a girl jerks a guy off while sucking his sac, pubic area, or bottom of dick.
Cock-Stuffing - Apparently somewhat on the fringe in gay circles, but involves using thin, cylindrical items (thermometers, wire, rubber worms, etc.), and inserting them into the dick hole. Over many months, continue to gradually ream out the hole-at-the-head with larger items, thus ultimately allowing your "buddy" to obtain the goal of fucking your urethra.
Cocoa and Tea - After doing the “Dog in a Bathtub” - you plop your buttstained basted balls in your ho’s mouth.
Coin Purse - A pair of balls.
Cold Faithful - Blowing your visibly-steaming load outside in the winter-time, like when you get your cock sucked on a ski-lift.
Cold Lunch - The act of vomiting directly onto some chick's head while she's performing fellatio.
Compton Gangbang - You meet a young lady at the bar. She tells you she has a boyfriend, but she ends up going home with you anyway for a one-night stand. When you take her to your place, tell your friends to wait outside your bedroom door. Just when she's about to get off, your friends barge in the room and plainly beat the shit out of her. That should teach her not to fuck around. (Ladies, feel free to perform a Compton Gangbang on guys too. I know you've got some fat girlfriends to help you out.
The Concoction - First, ejaculate all over the floor. Next, have your psycho bitch girlfriend menstruate on your semen. Stir it with your finger until you get a nice thick pink mixture. Proceed to paint yourselves up silly, just as if you were in kindergarten again.
The Concrete Mixer - This is one is where you're tappin dat ass doggystyle, ramming her head fiercly into the drywall ahead. When you spew, shoot it into her drywall ridden locks. Presto, Concrete.
Cop's Delight - The act of taking a girl in the ass, pulling out, and spewing all over her "pastry buns", thus transforming her rump into the allusion of an oversized, quivering glazed donut.
The Corkscrew - Cross your fingers, middle over index. Twist your wrist back and forth and go to work on your desired orifice. With practice, you'll have the effectiveness of a drill press and within weeks you'll be able to bore through wood.
Corn - Originating from the fine campus of Cornell University comes this unique, rarely used term. Saying that a girl is "Corn" means, she is so fucking hot, so beautiful, so utterly drop-dead gorgeous, that you would happily eat the corn out of her shit. Can be used as a great pick-up line or friendly compliment, for instance; "Baby, you're more Corn than Green Giant", or "Damn bitch, you are Corn!"
Corn Flakes - This requires a really dirty partner. When you're about to cum, shoot it in her ear. If she's dirty enough, she'll have plenty of ear wax. Hopefully, the ear wax will float atop the semen. With the correct coloration, her ear will look like a bowl of milk and cereal.
Corn Hole Rows - Getting your butt hair braided.
Couch Bombing - When you fill a small ziploc sandwich bag with Crisco (or your favorite lubrication) and place it between the cushions on the couch. You then proceed to fuck the couch as if it were a woman...but no need to buy It dinner first
Country Blumpkin - A Modified Blumpkin taking place in an outhouse
Coyote - Waking up with a nasty one night stand, you realize you have to give her/him the slip. You realize your arm is wrapped around them. You would rather gnaw off your own arm than risk waking them.
Crackmaster - Hold down someone you despise until helpless. Find a big fat bastard. Feed him lot's of beans. Then get him to spread his huge disgusting cheeks over the person's face. Placing the cornhole directly on the tip of the nose. Cut wind like never before. Laugh your ass off.
Cream Fountain - When a guy leaves his jizz on a water fountain, where the water comes out, so the next person to take a drink gets cream and water.
Cream Graffiti - Yet another gay fad that occurs when both partners fuck each other up the wazoo, and
then squeal out a massive fart thereby spraying their boys' cream all over themselves.
Crisco Ass - The greasy feeling that your ass gets after farting all day long and almost shitting in your
pants. Also known as Baboon Ass. Not particularly a sexual act, but funny enough to receive mention.
Crossed Swords - A blowjob involving two penises at one time. Three becomes a Jawbreaker.
Crossing the Delaware - Go from tits (aka "New Jersey") to the "British Fort" (take a guess) for a surprise attack while the girl is sleeping.
Crucifixion (see also "Crucifixion with a stake in it", "Martyr") - Getting it in 4 directions. a dick in each hand, one in the mouth, one in the ass.
Crucifixion with a stake in it (see also "Crucifixion", "Martyr") - Same as crucifixion except another dong in the snatch.
Cuban Defector - This is a trick for guys who have girls that don’t like to raw dog it. While doing her doggy style, slowly pull out and pop it in the starfish for a second. Pull your johnson out of her ass, leaving the condom in her cornhole. Then slide it back into the right hole and proceed with the doggystyle, rubber free.
Cum Dumpster - A quadriplegic whore.
Cum Guzzling Sperm Burping Bitch - The once in a lifetime act when blowing a hot steamy load down the back of the girl's throat, proceed to give her a large cold bottle of your most favorite carbonated drink and make her guzzle it down. Then, shake her head vigorously back and forth to create the Cum Guzzling, Sperm Burping effect. A great way to impress your friends.
Cunt Trumpet (see also "Muff Trumpet") - While down on a chick, place your lips solidly over her love hole and blow, watch her stomach rise as she fills with air. Then, with a firm hand push down on her stomach to let all the air out like the beautiful sound of a trumpet. WARNING! - We were recently informed that if performed improperly, the Cunt Trunpet could result in death!
Daisy Chain - Partner (A) is sucking off or eating out partner (B) who is sucking off or eating out partner (C) and so on until the final person is sucking off or eating out partner (A). Partners can be gay, lesbian or straight.
Davey Crockett - A sexual maneuver in which you slip muscle relaxants into your gal's snizzpod, then slide your head in, thus wearing your partner's now-relaxed snatch-fur as a coonskin cap. Can come in handy on those cold winter nights.
Deranged Rabbit - Sticking your ball bag out your pants while keeping your cock inside and pull your front pockets out to look like ears. Hopping around helps the effect.
Detachable Penis - In the dark while you are fucking your woman, instead of your penis to penetrate her cunt, use a banana or cucumber, or something that resembles a penis. Make unusual sexual "grunts" Proceed to fall out of the bed, leaving the penis-like object inside of her. If done right, she will go in a panic thinking your penis fell off.
The Dexter - Same as "Tony Danza" except you dish out repeated blows to the head whilst yelling "YOU ARE STEUUUUUPID! YOU ARE STEUUUUPID! AND DON'T FORGET, YOU ARE STEUUUUPID!!" in the cartoon Dexter voice (Dexter's Lab on Cartoon Network).
Dicksicle - Put a condom in the freezer filled with water all day until it is good and frozen. Then, when banging a girl later that night, right when she is about to climax, jam it into her and watch her eyes pop out of her head.
Dingle Berry Crunch - Have a hearty bean burrito for lunch. Relieve yourself and wipe minimally. When it's time to bone ask to have your salad tossed while she pulls your chain from behind. Scream out: "They're Grrrrrrrrreat!" before she gets a face full of babies.
Dirty Bomb - A sexual act during which the male lays pipe to the female or other male doggystyle and flings a paper plate full of feces (turds), which have been warmed in the microwave for 90 seconds, and smacks the recipient in the back of the head at the point of climax!
Dirty DeVito - When a Midget is sucking your dick, blow your load in her hair. Using your cum, shave the top of her head so she looks like the Penguin. Then, give her a cane, top hat and some fish.
Dirty Gomez (see also Dirty Sanchez) - Placing your index finger into you anus and painting a mustache on yourself, like the frito bandito- similar to the Dirty Sanchez but fun when your lonely.
The Dirty Harry - After banging a girl all day, have her give you a blowjob on her knees. Right before your ready to shoot your load, pull your ".44 magnum" out of her mouth and say "I know what your thinking, 'did he fire off all his loads or does he have one left?' With all this excitement I forget myself."....Knowing you got one round of goo in your "handgun" left, ask her "Do you feel lucky punk?" and shoot her in the face with your load while humming the theme song to the Clint Eastwood classic.
Dirty Jose - The homosexual act of making your partner clean your pooh covered member after a hearty bout of anal play.
Dirty Sanchez - During Doggystyle sex, the male inserts his finger into his partner's anus. He then proceeds to smear the fecal matter onto his partner's upper lip to create a mustache made of poo.
Dirty Swirly - While boning a chick doggie style near a toilet (preferably one filled with a healthy load of shit, or some hot piss, or both), stick her head in the toilet and flush...she'll dig it.
Dirty Walrus - When you hold your partner by the ears and force their mouth around your cornhole and shit until it come out of the nose.
DiscoBeat - Having sex at a party in a room that shares a wall with the main room. Proceed to screw in such a way that produces the Thump Thump Thump of the bass at a club. (noise from headboard banging the wall or "The Ram").
Divot - While making out with a woman, put your hand down her pants and grab as many pubes as you can. Then pull as many pubes as you can from her bush while yelling "Fore!"
Doggystyle - When the female is on all fours and the males enters her from behind, similar to they way dogs cohort.
Dog in the Bathtub (see also "Giving a Cat a Bath") - While having sex, trying to stuff your balls in your partner's asshole. It proves to be as difficult as keeping a dog in the bathtub.
The Dolphin - When you're doin a chick doggystyle in the box you pull out and try to put it in her ass, not wanting it anal, she bends her head around to look at you and expresses her displeasure by going "eh-eh, eh-eh" much like a dolphin sounds.
Donkey Punch - (don't recommend trying this one in any circumstance) During Doggystyle sex, the male punches his partner in the back of her head right before he climaxes. The female then tenses up from the blow giving the male a better orgasm.
Double Bass - A sexual position in which the man enters the woman from behind, and then fiddles with the woman's nipples with one hand and her Budgie's Tongue with the other. The position is similar to that used when playing a double bass instrument, but the sound produced is slightly different.
Double Bagger - 1) This is for when your banging a fat, ugly bitch outdoors. Put a bag over her head and one over yours also. Just in case the bag on her head blows off. 2) This is for when you are banging a nasty piece of ass, you must cover her head with two grocery bags... just in case one rips.
Double Dragon (see also "Split Pissonality", "PEUM") - Post sex urination where you get a double stream out of one peehole.
Double Wishbone - The play in which, while in seated 69 position, the man inserts both index fingers into the vagina and both middle fingers into the anus followed by aggressively pulling outwards with both arms. Spitting in anus, while optional, is encouraged for future maneuvers.
Draw Mud - While trying to fart, you shit in your pants. An unfortunate, and highly secretive occurrence.
Drilling for Oil - Pushing a girls knees behind her ears, and pounding her baloon knot in a downward motion.
Dropping The Chalupa -Fill a sock with as many bodily excrements as you have available, and whack some slut over the head with it. Best accomplished if it's a surprise during some hot back-door action.
Dry Fucking (see also "Dry Humping") - The act of having sex with your clothes on.
Dry Humping (see also "Dry Fucking") - The act of having sex with your clothes on.
Duck Butter - The sweat that accumulates between your balls and ass.
Duct Tape Trick - Wrapping a hamster in duct tape so you can safely fuck it without the danger of a messy split.
Dussy - The act of tucking your limp penis behind and in between your legs, thus imitating a woman's genetalia.
Dutch Oven - While a girl is going down on you, you blow ass and pull the covers over her head .
Dutch Treat - The unexpected result of a Dutch Oven gone terribly awry. Can be very messy.
DVDA - The abbreviation for "double-anal, double-vaginal". This is the term used when a girl takes four cocks in two holes. A hard core porn industry norm.
Eastside Glaze - Same as the westside glaze, but the majority of your jizz lands on the right side of her face.
Eggs Danny Thomas Style - Danny Thomas used to pay hookers to defecate onto the top of a glass- topped coffee table, while he lay underneath and watched.
The Eiffel Tower - When two guys are enjoying a girl from both ends, then they reach up and high five over her, creating a mock Eiffel Tower.
The 18th Ave. Feast (aka "The Carnival") - While your double teaming a girl with your friend, one of you bang her in the pink and the other bangs her in the stink. At the same time pull out of her leaving the condoms inside. Count to 3 and at the same time start peeing out of your pistol and into your balloon. Whoever pops their balloon first wins the dirty stuffed animal.
The Electric Chair - Your psychobitch girlfriend decides she wants to try something kinky, so she props your stupid naive ass up in a chair, strips you down, and ties you up. After arousing you, she then takes a car battery and clamps two jumper cables to each nut sack. This causes you to have all sorts of synapses, spasms, and convulsions. She then mounts your Frankenstein and proceeds to get electrofucked. Warning! May cause erectile dysfunction after performed.
The Elephant (aka "The Bunny") - A guy takes everything out of his pockets pulls his pockets out so it looks like a pair of ears then un-zips pulls out his trunk and has a girl suck away.
Emersons - Code word for "nice tits" when you are trying to be subtle in public. (ie "Knock, knock..." "Who's there?" "Emerson." "Emerson who?" "Emerson nice titties...")
Eskimo Frenchbread Surprise - While nailing her doggystyle, you shove a frozen breadstick in her butt.
Esplanade - To attempt to explain your whiskey dick to a girl. You are obviously drunk.
ET - Next time you've got some dumb-ass fuck puppet ready to go, grab her purse and excuse yourself to the can while the drunken whore waits, lost in her own tangled bush. Get her mother's (or husband's) phone number from her purse while making fake shit noises. Flush the toilet for effect then grab the cordless phone on the way back to bed. As soon as you find yourself stabbing her bucket with your johny, dial the number and hold the phone near her head with same hand your pulling hair with and bang away. Make sure you mention her name and ask her things like, "Who's the biggest whore in the world?" and "You like fat cocks up your dirt road don't you?". Then throw the phone on the bed and tell it's for her. A nice topper to this maneuver is to take her money and throw her outside nude and lock the door. I like to threaten to kill her if I ever see her again. You might have your own closing. Have fun. Be creative. Get it – ET phones home.
Etch-A-Sketch - Trying to draw a smile on a women's face by turning her knobs (nipples)
The Exploding Thorns - A variation on the Shocker. Penetrate the chick with your fingers crossed (middle over index and ring over pinky) and then immediately uncross them while yelling out "BOOM!" Always remember the thumb for the clitoral stimulation.
Facial - Attacking some poor, helpless bastard and grinding his nuts into their face while slapping his cock on their forehead.
Fartin Whisky - When you fart so hard, a hemorrhoid starts bleeding.
Fat Lip - If you get poison ivy and finger a girl, her labia lips will swell. A la, the fat lip.
Fat Guy In a Little Coat - When your dick is too big for the girl's box.
Felching - The act of sucking semen from your partner's butt.
Fidel Castro - Take a shit on the chick's face, rip out some pubes and toss’ em on her grillpiece, and then top it off by having her "smoke your cigar."
Fire in the Hole - A revenge technique of pre-sex greasing up of your schlong with a mixture of Bengay and Tobasco Sauce.
The Fire Fighter - Fuck a hairy chick and before you blow your load light her pube's on fire and put it out with your cum.
The Fire Island - This consists of telling someone you're going to spunk on their face while they are asleep, only half-jokingly, and then when they don't believe you, doing it just to prove that you're that demented.
The Fish Eye - Working from behind, you shove your finger in her pooper. Thereupon, she turns around in a one-eyed winking motion to see what the hell you are doing.
Fish-Hook - When you pull back towards the pussy after you stick your finger up her anus.
Flaming Amazon - Whilst having missionary style sex, just before you jizz, pull out and set her pubes on fire, then proceed to douse the flames with your hose.
Flaming Pele - While having sex with a girl, right before you blow your load, you pull out, light her pubes on fire and then rare back and kick her in the cunt to put the flames out. hence the "Flaming Pele" after the great Brazilian soccer player.
The Flock of Seagulls - Don't bang or jerkoff for a week straight. Then when your catching head from a girl, shoot your monster load in her hair and style it the same way the 80's band Flock of Seagulls front man Mike Score so boldly did.
Flying Camel - As she is lying on her back and you are hammering her from your knees, you carefully balance yourself without using your arms to prop yourself up. You then proceed to flap your arms and let out a long, shrieking howl, much like a coyote.
Fly's Eyes - Like the "Deranged Rabbit", but without the pockets being pulled out, looks like a fly's head.
The Flying Dutchman - This didn't used to be a specific deviant sexual act, it was just a phrase that sounded dirty and would be shouted out during intercourse on occasion simply for the novelty factor. However, its popularity increased and it has now developed into a specific act, namely that of, just as you are about to blow a load, in any sort of sexual situation (even masturbation for those true pioneers who are constantly on the cutting edge of the sexual revolution) you begin to shout, "Here comes the Flying Dutchman!" This should confuse your sexual partner (or whoever is in hearing range) completely, sometimes causing interesting side effects.
Flooding The Cave - Inserting the penis into a woman's pussy and then urinating inside her. Applies to butt pirates as well.
Foggy Windshield - Spilling the man milkshake on the glasses of some four-eyed filthy.
Forever T-H-O (see also "T-H-O") - Very very rare. You find a woman whose nipples just tend to stay hard no matter what always giving a tease to those around her. It is even more rare in guys; and once again noone really cares.
Fortune Cookie - After nailing a chick on a one-night job, lodge the condom in her pussy for the next guy to find.
Fountain of You - While sitting on her face and having her eat your ass, jerk off like a madman. Build up as much pressure as possible before releasing, spewing like a venerable geyser all over her face, neck and tits. (Better in her bed)
Four Wheel Drive - Fucking, or getting fucked during the peak of your genital herpes flare up, cause while you fuck, it's a bumpy ride.
Freudian Slip - Shitting in your pants while farting. Farting is what you are doing, but shitting is your subconscious wants.
Frothy Walrus - As a man climaxes during a blowjob, he makes a joke, causing the blower to laugh, thus expelling the semen out his or her nose.
Frosting the Cake - When you are about to cum, blow a load all over her chest. Then take your dick and evenly spread the Jism around the breasts and over the nipples. Then stick some candles on it and start singing "Happy Birthday." Then blow out the candles
The Fudgecicle (aka "Hot Carl") - when you withdraw your shaft from the bowels of her anus and place it directly into her mouth for a cleaning. (used mostly in gay sex, so we hear)
Full Curl - The act of giving a "Dirty Walrus" while holding your partners nose closed until it comes out of the ears.
Fumilingus - When a man (or woman) performs cunnilingus on a woman and she farts directly in his/her face.
Fumunda Cheese - Referring to the crusty buildup of bacteria, wax, and crusted urine that forms on the underside of the penis. "Fumunda my nuts".
Fupa (aka "Gunt") - Acronym for "Front Upper Pussy Area". Defined as the big sack of fat that women have below the stomach and above the pussy. ie, "She has way too much fupage for me."
Fur Ball - Receiving a lodged pubic hair while performing oral sex.
Game Of Smiles - This game involves a bunch of men sitting around a table at their favorite bar and a woman giving random blowjobs underneath the table. Anyone who smiles has to buy a round of beer for the rest.
The Gardener - when you are doing a girl from behind, you pause and yank the hairs (weeds) from her asshole, then you proceed to "sow your seed" by cumming on her anus.
Gas Mask - While doing the San Fran Tickler, fart in her mouth.
Gay Poupon - The slimy see-thru brown coating a gay guy gets on his dick during some hot hairy butt
sex. I overheard people joking about this at a time when I would not have preferred to lose my appetite. Can apply to heterosexual butt action as well I suppose, but the term generally loses its humor.
Gaylord Perry - Going to only one knuckle during an anal probe is for wimps. Make this famous knuckle-ball pitcher proud and use multiple digits on that virgin corn hole. A minimum of 2 knuckles required (either on one finger or on multiple).
German Tourist - A chick so nasty and vile just for fun you and your buddies wind up fucking, pissing and shitting on.
Giving the Cat a Bath (see also "Dog in the Bathtub") - the act of trying to insert your testicles into a girls asshole, this is very hard to do, hence "giving the cat a bath"
Glass Boat (see also "Pittsburgh Platter") - Cover her face with plastic wrap and take a dump.
Glazed Donut - The act of taking a girl in the ass, pulling out, and spoo-ing all over her pastry buns, thus transforming her rump into the illusion of an oversized, quivering glazed donut.
Gloryhole - The well known term for a hole in a wall, or bathroom stall that a guy puts his dick through so some stranger can suck or fuck it.
Goalposting - In the missionary position, you pull both her legs up and rest her ankles on top of your shoulders, so they are like goal posts. More flexible women can enjoy this for a longer period of time.
The Gobstopper - When a girl is giving you head and when yer a bout to bust a nut she covers the hole of yer penis thus blocking the cum from coming out.
The Golden Gate Bridge - This involves a woman lying down (probably a hooker). A guy stands either end of her, pull out their cocks and proceed to both urinate arcs of piss into the woman’s naval area - hence creating a mock "Golden Gate Bridge"
Golden Shower (see also "Water Sports") - Any involvement of Urine in sex
Gorilla Mask - Shave off you pubes prior to sex, when you ready blow a load all over her face, then throw your pubes all over her face. voila....the pubes stuck to her face will cause her to resemble a gorilla.
Going For A McShit - Entering a fast food restaurant with no intention of buying food, you're just going to the shitter. If challenged by a pimply staff member, just tell them that you'll buy a McShit with Lies afterwards.
Goo Geyser - (aka "Old Faithful") Shoot your load in a girls belly button, once it is full press on her stomach making the load shoot out like a fountain... hence old faithful. gooey patterson Hollow out a round hole in a cantaloupe or other large melon, microwave it for about a minute, and fuck it like the prom queen you never got a piece of. When you are done blowing your baby batter and pull out, you get back a gooey shaft, hence the name, Gooey Patterson.
Good Waste Of $300 - If you're with some prissy bitch who only wants to fuck once during the night, demand to give it to her from behind. While ramming her ass hardcore, drop a Sony Playstation 2 on the back of her head. When she turns around and looks at you, say "Sweet! I've always wanted one of those!", and continue pumping away. She'll be so bewildered, you'll be able to get away with 5-10 more fucks that night. Expect a few weird looks, though.
The Graffiti - Have sex with a married/engaged girl, when she falls asleep write embarrassing , x-rated remarks (or something like "This bitch belongs to John" ) on her back with a big bold permanent marker. She goes home and has the "where the fuck were you" fight. later that day, when she showers the boyfriend/husband sees your graffiti and the fight starts all over again. For that matter the fights will continue for the newt two weeks. This works even better when a girl does it to a guy.
Grankefication - The act of relieving a pussy-drought by fucking inanimate objects such as microwaves, televisions, coffee tables, etc. "He's in his room Granking one off."
Gravy Sliding - The act of partaking in anal sex, diarrhea optional.
Greek - The act of using your "glue stick" (if you know what I'm saying) and gluing your gal's eyes closed with your man seed. E.g. "Hey guys, check it out, I just greeked her!" or "Sorry honey, but you asked for the Greek salad
Grilled Cheese - When a girl lets cum dry in her overnight, the next morning she has to peel her pussy apart to piss, it looks like she is peeling apart a grilled cheese sandwich.
Gunt (aka "Fupa") - When the gut overlaps the cunt.
Half Past the Monkey's Ass - Wearing your wristwatch on your cock. After a person asks you the time, you whip it out and say "Quarter to my balls." The fucking look on their face is just priceless.
The Halmstad Hook - This is a unique sequence of events named after a town in Sweden, where this apparently happens quite frequently. After dumping your spunk in her rear, the sauce is sucked out of the anus by the male. Once the sauce has transferred from her bowls to your mouth--the product that has been created is now known as "Swedish Cheese." The move is completed when the "Swedish Cheese" is transferred to the ladies mouth via a deep tongue kiss. You can cap this off with a swift stinging slap of her ass to show her how much you care and appreciate all her hard work.
Ham And Cheese Sandwich - Eating a woman's box after you ejaculate all over it. A delightful, tasty combination of her yummy meat curtains with your added cheesy topping is sure to appeal to anyone's appetite.
Hanging Brain - Generic term used to describe the act of exposing one's scrotum in public in a variety of creative and imaginative manners (i.e. dangling on handrails, in background of tourist's photos, pressed up against window of moving car, etc.).
Hannibal - Drinking 151 all night and waking up to you riding an elephant that you took home the night before.
Harlem Globetrotter - Spinning as many basketballs on her body as you can while u are giving it to her doggystyle.
Head Of The Class - When you and your friends compete in school to see who can get aroused the most times fantasizing about the cute young teacher.
The Helen Keller - The man is fucking the woman, before he finishes he punches her in the ears so she goes deaf and get knocked out, then he pulls out and cums into her eyes so she blind.
Hershey Highway - Another colorful euphamism for anal sex.
High Dive - The skill of pulling your Johnson all the way out of your partner's hole and in one motion jamming it home again. Best suited for use in the corn hole, but can be very dangerous.
High-Fiving - When two men are enjoying the same partner from opposite ends
The Hindenburg - When some slut who is so bad at oral sex, you're forced to cry "Oh! The humanity!" as her teeth scrape your man tool.
Hoagie Slap - The act of slapping your semi-hard rod against a girls face multiple times.
Hogging - While intoxicated, high, or just plain desperate, you go searching for the fattest bitch you can find and proceed to ride her like a Harley. Best accomplished with large groups friends.
Hole In One - The act of sticking your dick in your own ass. Just try not to get a huge boner once it's in, or you'll get a nice snapparoo.
The Homolick Manuever - Using your penis to dislodge an object blocking a choking victim's windpipe.
Hot Carl - 1) (aka "The Fudgecicle") - when you withdraw your shaft from the bowels of her anus and place it directly into her mouth for a cleaning. (used mostly in gay sex, so we hear) 2) - The act of taking a dump directly into the mouth of your partner
Hot Karl Candy Cane - A variation of the above in which the man who is receiving the oral cock cleaning gives the woman a reach around.
Hotdog In A Hallway - When laying the pipe, you realize your dick isn't even touching the walls of her vagina, kind of like tossing a hotdog in a hallway. Most frequently happens when banging the neighborhood trick or if you're slinging a small dick.
Hot Lunch - The result of defecating a tube of shit directly into a girl's mouth.
Hot Lunch, Vegeterian - (see Hot Plate) A variation upon the aforementioned meal in which the diner stretches a piece of saran wrap over her mouth such that chewing (for texture) is possible, but no actual contact with animal product occurs.
Hot Plate – (See Vegetarian Hot Lunch)The act of placing plastic wrap over a girl's face and then shitting on it.
Hot Pocket - When you get a boner in public and cant control the urges anymore, thus making a hot pocket.
Houdini - When you¹re doing a girl doggy style, then you fake an orgasm (spit on her back). When she turns around, blow your load in her face and say, "Abracadabra bitch!" also known as the David Copperfield and the David Blaine.
Hummer - When a male receives oral sex and the giver "hums" during the act.
Hummer Bird - When a girl is giving a guy a hummer, and he's enjoying it, she bites on his bird.
The Hunter Gatherer - You and your partner defecate while 69ing. Pretty much self-explanatory.
Hunting For The HIV- The act of banging at least 10 random whores in a single week without wearing a rubber. Also gets compounded if you end up shooting up smack with one of the skanks.
Ice Cream in the Grass - When after sex with a girl just before or after her period week. When her juices are thicker than usual, and you pull out and see the sticky creamy goo in your pubes.
Ice T-bag - The act of dropping your testicles onto your partners face and/or mouth while holding an ice cube against your nuts and letting it drip on their face.
The Indian Cock Burn - While a chick sucks you off, she twists her hand around your shaft as if she was trying to give you an Indian burn.
Inhibation - The state of being too inhibited to masturbate in front of your lover.
Inspecting the Platoon - When a girl gets on her knees to perform a blow job the guy snaps to attention and blows his load in her face.
Instagasm - Pre-mature ejaculation at the sight of a beautiful woman.
ie: "She was so fine, I had an insta-gasm before I could get her clothes off!"
Intoxicourse - Having sexual intercourse whilst piss-drunk.
Jawbreaker - A blowjob involving three penises at one time. Two Penises is known as Crossed Swords.
The Jedi Mind Trick - When banging your partner, you repeatedly shout "I'm NOT fucking you, I'm NOT fucking you".
Jelly Donut (aka "Bizmark", "Clownface", "Strawberry Shortcake", "Strawberry Milkshake") - when a guy blows his load on a girls face, Then swiftly punches her in the nose, causing it to bleed. Giving the appearance of a strawberry shortcake.
The JFK 1) (aka "The Magic Bullet") - Slip a blindfold on a chick while she is giving you oral. At the same time, have a friend come behind her and pleasure himself behind her. Let em rip at the same time and nail the broad with goo from both sides of her head. She will always question if there was a second shooter or just a magic load 2) Don't have sex or masturbate for a couple of weeks, saving a big load up. Then have a woman go down on you and blow that massive load in her mouth, blowing the back of her head off.
Jim Henson - Sticking all 5 fingers in a girls' box and picking her up like a muppet...Hence the Jim Henson.
J.O.D. - ("Joad") - Jerking Off while Driving. Try it while going through the Drive-Thru of your choice...
Journey into Darkness - This is the most disturbing (and difficult?) of all. It entails shitting into another person's asshole. Not for beginners.
The Juanita Special Bean Dip - While your tramp rides you like a mechanical bull, insert your thumb into her poop chute (be sure to get your thumb nice and gooey), then stick your brown thumb into her mouth, and slip it under her tongue so she can get the full robust taste of the Juanita "special" bean dip.
Kaboose - When a group of guys a slam a girl in the same night, the Kaboose is the last person to go. Similar to sloppy seconds, but entails more than 2 people.
Kamala - Banging a fat black woman while eating a rotisserie chicken off the fat folds behind her neck.
Karen Carpenter - Fucking a chick in the ass while she vomits. Feels a lot like a multi-donkey punch.
Kennebunkport Chowder - Eat a girl out and vomit the contents of the New England clam chowder you ate for lunch between her legs.
Kennebunkport Surprise - The act of covertly filling your cheeks with chunky-style New England clam chowder, and screaming in disgust as you hurl it between your partners legs while eating her out.
Kenny Roger's Roasters - While doing the bitch in front of the fire, stick it in the pooper and twirl her around on your dick-thus creating the roaster effect. Do until a golden crispy brown.
Kentucky Plow - You're doing a girl doggy style on a hard floor, then you sweep her arms our from under her so that she bangs her face on the floor, knocking out her teeth. -
Kick-Fucking - The act of receiving sexual pleasure from repeatedly getting kicked in the ass.
Kids Drink - After 4 or 5 people get done fucking a girl everyone bust in a cup and let her drink it.
Kiss Of Death - Get a girl whose been cheating on you (but thinks she is getting away with it) to go down on you after having secretly coated your dick with cyanide.
The Landshark - The woman braces herself facing a wall, naked, hands against the wall, legs spread, bent over so that her ass is lusciously jutting out. (hint: She might want to wear a biking helmet and some rollerblading wrist guards to avoid serious injury.) Next, the guy also naked as well as stiff cocked, walks to the opposite end of the room, places his palms together and raises them above his head, (thus imitating the dorsal fin of a shark) and begins chanting the theme to Jaws. When given some predetermined signal, the guy sprints toward the girl at full speed with his pelvis-out, fin protruding, and rams her dead square in the ass.
Lay-Away - Instead of giving up on that young little hottie that you know you're too old for, but just
can't resist, you begin to "work her over (ya know, play the nice guy, father figure type...)" in hopes that you can scoop her up when she's legal. This approach is much like the lay- away system, you get the merchandise when the time is right.
Leave In Conditioner - In a public place, you strategically leave drops of semen in a woman's hairdo following fellatio. A good lesson for those who refuse to swallow the evidence.
Leonardo Dicaprio - You are getting head from a girl. She is sitting in a chair, you are standing. Just when you are about to cum, lean forward putting all your wait against her mouth. Stretch out your arms and yell "I'm the king of the world"
Let's Play Dracula - Trick a girl into Halloween shenanigans by making her, " Vant to suck your Cock" till it bleeds.
Little Man in the Canoe (see also "Budgie's Tongue") - Euphemism for the clitoris. The Clitoris is the little man and the pussy is the canoe. aka "The Little Man in the Boat"
Lloyd Bridges - When she's giving the head job and you're just about to blow, twitch and yell "Who is it?" She will look around. Blow in her ear. She will look confused, and will jerk her head repeatedly to one side, just like Lloyd Bridges did to get the seawater out of his ear in Sea Hunt. (For those too young to remember, he was a crime-busting scuba diver).
Log Ride - (usually done with 2 males) Both partners spread their cheeks and press both stinkers together. Then one of the partners defecates while the other receives. If both partners defecate, its known as "log wars".
Long John Silver - Don't jerk off or fuck for a week Call your girl over and tell her you miss her and that she should get to "singing into the mic" right away. When your about to cum, yank your hose and put out the fire in either eye. This should help her to resemble the famed pirate.
The Lorena Bobbit - Obviously, this one is for the ladies. When engaging in some hard core booty sex, squeeze your butt cheeks together as tight as you can, and start violently jumping and thrashing your ass around, in an effort to rip his dick off. (To reach true Lorena status, you must take the severed dick for a drive and then toss it out the window.)
Lost Goat (aka "The Snake Skin") - The act of staying inside her after sex until you go limp, then pulling out leaving behind your condom and its contents.
Louisiana Licker - Originally a flavor of chicken wing at a famous chain of western Pennsylvania restaurants - also the name of a position when you find yourself lying on your back nostril deep in the cooch of a nasty beeotch with swamp ass (a.k.a. baboon ass, crisco ass, etc.).
Louisville Slugger - Your girl is on her knees in front of you servicing your pole. At some random point in time during this act you pull out, twist your hips, yell "BATTER UP!!!!" and smack her firmly in the cheek with your baseball bat like cock.
Lucky Pierre - The middle man in a three way butt fuck.
Lucky Pierre's Magic Whistle - The middle man in a three way butt fuck who's also blowing another guys brains out.
Magic Bullet (aka "The JFK") - Slip a blindfold on a chick while she is giving you oral. At the same time, have a friend come behind her and pleasure himself behind her. Let em rip at the same time and nail the broad with goo from both sides of her head. She will always question if there was a second shooter or just a magic load.
Magiver - When you are sleeping with a girl and then you wake up pop a rod and slap her in the throat then she spits up your cum.
Mangina - When a man places his penis and testicles between his thighs so as to give the impression of having a vagina rather than male genitalia.
Mangry - Describing the anger of women who are angry at men, specifically. "She's such a bitch, she's just plain mangry."
Marksmenship Training - Perform a psuedo "Dirty Sanchez" on her butt, but instead of a mustache, draw a bullseye around your woman's ass and fire away.
Martin Van Buren Panties - When a woman doesn't shave or wax her bikini area, the hair creeping out from under her panties and growing on her inner thighs resembles the muttonchops worn by the Eighth President of the United States.
Manure Transfer - The act when the woman's back and the bed are perpendicular but she is upside down (see SAMOAN PILE DRIVER), back-to-back with the right-side-up standing man. Through careful anal-orifice matching techniques, the man craps directly into the woman's upside-down pooper.
Martyr (see also Crucifixion, Crucifixion with a stake in it) - The Martyr is the receiver of the dicks in a "Crucifixion"
The McDonald's Quick Draw - Get your girlfriend to talk dirty into the intercom, making the order guy start to beat off. Then while pulling up to the window, have her give you felatio till you are about to blow your beefy chunk-load. Upon pulling up to the window, tell your girl friend to yell "Draw!". Then on "three", both you and the guy blow your loads either on her or each other.
Meating - A synonym for gay butt sex. So you could ask someone if you were still on for you meating later. It can also be used as a verb. You could say "Lance gave me a severe meating."
Meatlocker - You are getting brains in a Meat Locker. You cream in her eye and it freezes shut.
The Mellon Dive - Headbutting a woman's big fat titties. Always lots of fun.
Membrane Game - Jamming your thumb up a girl's pussy and your index finger up her asshole, and then rubbing the membrane between the two.
The Menthol - The act of getting head from a woman who just moments earlier ate a numerous amounts of cough drops, thus insuring a pleasurable, tingly feeling on your cock.
The Mexican Avalanche - This is when you cum in their hair and throw them down a flight of stairs.
Middle Relief - Some unknowing fans wonder how a professional pitcher can go through a season with one or two wins, one or two losses, and one or two saves. Those of us who know our pasttime realize that he is most likely in the shittiest part of the rotation known as "middle relief." While the middle reliever comes in to provide sustenance after one pitcher is tired and before another comes in to secure a save, the middle relief maneuver is also used in "down time." If you have been pummel-fucking a girl for a while and begin to go a bit limp, use the nearest cylindrical object (fingers, dildo, bedpost, lead pipe) and ram it home while you take a bit of a breather. This will allow the starting pitcher the necessary time to rest and provide him with sufficient time to warm up to full strength once again. He then can come on as closer to secure the deal. Forget about that curve ball, Ricky...give her the meat!
M.I.L.F - The abbreviation for "Mom I'd Like to Fuck". This old school reference is used when one of your friends/girlfriends has a hottie for a Mom.
Milking the Cow - Have sex with a girl with a rubber on, then afterwards pull the rubber off ever so carefully so that all of your specimens are in the bottom then after sex, while she is in a post orgasm eyes- shut bliss, while laying down hold it upside down over her face and use the condom while pretend your milking cow utters.
Milky Fire Hydrant - When you jizz in your girls pussy and then proceed to press down very hard on her stomach and just above her pussy and then it will shoot out very fast all over your self like a fire hydrant.
The Milky Weigh - Preceding sexual or oral intercourse, both the male and female is weighed on a scale. Immediately following the weighing session, intercourse is commenced. After ejaculation, each individual is then weighed once again to observe how much weight is lost in the male, and gained in the female due to the exchange of semen.
Minjeeta - A Paki Lesbian.
Missionary - Sexual position characterized by the female on the bottom and the male on the top, default sex position.
The Missouri Compromise - When a girl will only let guys fuck her in the ass because she is still a "virgin".
Monet - A girl is considered a Monet when, just like the great works of the impressionist painter himself, she is good from far but far from good.
Monkey Wrench - When some sadistic bitch takes your dick back between your legs and sucks you off.
Monroe Transfer - The act when the woman's back and the bed are perpendicular but she is upside down (see 'Samoan Pile Driver'), back-to-back with the right-side-up standing man. Through careful anal- orifice matching techniques, the man craps directly into the woman's upside-down pooper.
The Moose - The sign given to a kickee when in doggie style. It is performed by placing both hands over your head with palms facing out and waving your fingers wildly.
Moose Knuckle (see also "Ninja Foot", "Camel Toe", "The Mumbler") - A girl in pants so tight, you can make out the outline of her lips.
The Moped - A chick that's a fun ride until your friends see you on it, if you know what I mean.
The Mork - Made famous by Robin Williams on Mork & Mindy, stick your pinky and ring fingers up a girls ass, then jam your middle and index fingers up her cunt. (Please note: Not complete until you finish it off with a Nanoo-Nanoo!)
Morning Glory - This occurs the morning after a really good one-night-stand. You wake up sporting morning wood, and instead of getting up and going to the bathroom, you ram into your partner's ass and relieve yourself inside her. Experts can take it a step further and attempt this on their (soon to be ex-) girlfriends.
Moses - A man who enjoys going down on a woman during her period. Derived from the Biblical figure Moses, who parted the Red Sea.
The Motorboat - While performing oral sex on a girl, flap your lips together on her clit, thus imitating the sound of a motorboat. She'll love you forever.
The Motorcycle - While receiving a blowjob, you fart as loud as you can, at the same time twisting the cocksuckers ears like the throttle of a motorcycle.
Mudslide - Titty fucking a girl while sitting on top of her, then getting up to find skid marks on her stomach.
Muff Teaser - Finger, suck, eat, etc. a girl until she is begging for it. Then rub your stiffy round her golden valley until she screams at you to give her a banging. Right when her frustration is at its highest level, stop and finish with a DIY(do it yourself) hand job. Then leave the room without saying a word. Not to be tried if you want to shack up with the selfish bitch again.
Muff Trumpet (see also "Cunt Trumpet") - When your eating a girl out you blow into really hard in her pussy than press her stomach down and it will make the soothing sound of a trumpet.
Muhamad Ali - (for a girl) While giving your soon to be ex-boyfriend a hummer, start punching his nutsack as if it were a punching bag.
The Mumbler (see also "Moose Knuckle", "Ninja Foot", "Camel Toe") - A girl in pants that are too tight (you can see the lips moving but you can't make out what they're saying).
The Mung - Obtain a female that has been dead for 2-3 days (the time period since death is important). Then place your mouth just outside her vaginal opening. Have a friend jump on her stomach, and try to catch as much stuff that comes out as you can in your mouth.
The Mushroom Welt (aka "Mushroom Tattoo") - when a chick's going down on you, you pull it out, pull it back and whip her in the forehead with it....thus....mushroom tattoo.
The Mushroom Tattoo (aka "Mushroom Welt") - when a chick's going down on you, you pull it out, pull it back and whip her in the forehead with it....thus....mushroom tattoo
Mushy Biscuit - This is actually a very fun game. Just choose a piece of food that you and your male friends like to eat. Then you and your buddies form a tight circle around the food item and proceed to jerk off all over it. Last one to bust a nut gets the prize of eating the food.
The Napoleon Bonar-Part - Strap a bayonet on your cock while fucking a French midget.
Neopolitan - The first shit after a good ass-ramming. Brown, white and red.
New Jersey Meat Hook - 1) When a man is having sex with a woman from behind, he then places a thumb in her anus to pull her up and down his penis. 2) Inserting 2 or more fingers into your lady's poontang and your thumb in her poop chute and leading her around the room like a little doggie...
The New York Bird Feeder (see also "The Russian Bird Feeder") - Eating a girls pussy while she's shitting.
New York Style Taco - Get really drunk. Then go down on her and puke while eating her out.
The 9:15 Wake Up Call - While a girl is sleeping, two guys stand above her on opposite sides, masturbating on her face. Her face will look like a clock with one hand on the 9 the other on the three. Wake that filthy slob up with 2 steaming loads of goos across her grill, yelling " its 9:15 you dirty animal!!!"
Ninja Foot (see also "Camel Toe", "Moose Knuckle", "The Mumbler") - A girl in pants so tight, you can make out the outline of her lips.
The Nixon - A variation of the Bullwinkle in which you give two peace signs as your signal of dominance. May enhance the act by shaking jowls and yelling, "I'm not a crook". This is considered very bold and is frowned upon for those with a modicum of decorum.
Nut Butter - The sweat and stink of the juices between your nuts and legs after a physical work out/sex.
Obtaining the Brown License - When the guy gives the out-hole a shagging for the first time in his life, he's acquired his brown license.
Oil Drill (for the ladies?) - you are jammin her in the ass, she happens to have diarrhea all over your Johnson
Old Jism Trail - The stream of semen oozing down the chin and chest of someone who has just finished fellating a senior citizen.
Old Faithful - 1) (usually done with 2 males) when one partner blows air, in a CPR manner, into the other partners anus. Then, while in the baby wipe position, the blowing partner urinates on the others stinker while he farts all the air out. 2) (aka "Goo Geyser") Shoot your load in a girls belly button, once it is full press on her stomach making the load shoot out like a fountain... hence old faithful.
On The Rocks - A great party favorite accomplished by dunking your nutsack in someone's drink after they left the room. When the person returns, enjoy the sight of them drinking your scrotal rinse. Enjoy extra laughs if you leave a nice pube in there sticking up like a tacky drink umbrella.
The One Eyed Redskin - After banging a girl on her period, wipe the blood on her face, come in her eye, and stick a feather in her ear. Then dance around the room, naked with a towel over ur junk, yelling, "woo woo woo woo!!".
Ookie Kookie (see also "The Wet Biscuit") - A method of circle jerk in which there is a cookie in the middle of the circle and the last person to shoot their load has too eat the cookie.
Ordering a Code Red - At Climax the guy yells out, "YOU CAN"T HANDLE THE TRUTH!", and crams his cock in the pink (or red) as hard as he can.
Oreo (see also "Zebra") - Threeway sex with two black individuals banging a white person.
Oscars Treat - This ones for the outdoor enthusiasts: Make sure your next "first time" date is on the night before trash day. As you greet the "ho" at her front door you tell her that because of your OCD you have a ritual you must perform before you begin the date. Being the gentleman that you appear to be she obliges. Before the tuna machine knows what hit her, grab the rope from the front seat of your truck and hog tie her to the curbside mailbox. Quickly strip her rotten, and with the respect of a sailor on leave... fill every orifice with the nearby garbage. After giving her a few rabbit punches, spank one out in the mailbox and go home.
Oven Stuffer Roaster - The unusual method of inserting your finger in the ass of your partner while screwing her, and feeling her cervix. This procedure is more effective from behind (see NEW JERSEY MEATHOOK).
Oyster - A derivation of the tea bag which is accomplished by numbing one's testicles with ice and then inserting them in a chicks mouth and letting the tramp munch on them.
Pajaowa! - The sound that is made when a guy cock-slaps his girl in the face.
Pasadena Mudslide - This happens when you leave a windy shit between the breasts of a woman while you straddle her neck for a blowjob. (A close cousin to the Cleveland Steamer.)
Pattycake - While you're nailing some girl doggie style and your friend is catching some head off the same girl, you get a quick game of pattycake going. This makes you reminisce of your childhood memories and eases the sight of watching your friend blow his load.
Paying Off The Umpire - When you go to a hooker because you cant get to 3rd base on your own.
Paying The Rent - A sexual position in which the woman is folded in half, knees above shoulders, with the man holding the back of her calves and banging ferociously.
Peanut butter & Jelly Sandwich - You shit on a girls pussy when she is on her period and eat her out. Way sick!
Peanut Butter Poodle - When going down on a chick in the dark, rub peanut butter on her sweet snatch. Then have your or her dog lick the rest of it off, without her knowing.
Pearl Harbor (for the ladies) - Right after sucking a guy off stand up and spit his jizz right back in his face, then yell "Tora, Tora, Tora!"
Pearl Necklace - When she is giving oral sex, you pull back and shoot it on her neck-- thus a pearl necklace .
Pegging - Having a female take you in the rear with a strap on.
Pencil Sharpener - When a girl uses her teeth during felatio
Penguin Blow - This happens when a hooker offers to blow you for five dollars. Of course you accept the offer and remove your pants. She gets on her knees, gives you two licks, reaches and grabs your wallet from your hanging pants and then runs off. You are left chasing after her with your pants around your ankles, thus imitating a waddling penguin.
Penis Watch - When you wrap your limp mantool all the way around your wrist. Great party trick.
Perfect Ten - The maximum number of men a woman can pleasure at one time. So called because of the math involved: one each in the mouth, anus, and vagina, one in each hand, one in the crook of each elbow, one in the bend of each knee and one between the feet.
PEUM (see also "Double Dragon", "Split Pissonality") - An acronym that defines the annoying (and uncontrollable) tendency to piss in multiple directions after a raucous fuck: Post-Ejaculatory Urinary Misfire.
The Pig Roast - While you're plugging some girl's hole doggie style, (up the dirt road or the funhole, pick your poison) she's blowing your best friend's cock at the same time, hence simulating a pig on a spit. Very Similar to Chinese Finger Cuffs.
Pillow Fluff - First, you press your butt tightly on a pillow and fart. After holding the fart in the pillow
with your ass cheeks for two seconds, quickly turn around and stuff your nose directly into the fart epicenter. Inhale deeply, and reap the rewards of euphoria and disorientation.
Piniata - After hooking up with a girl, while your both just laying there grab your boxers and put them over her head and take your penis and smack it over her head repeatedly.
Pink Glove - This often occurs when a girl isn't wet enough during sex. When you attempt to remove your member from her box, the inside of her twat sticks to your hog, hence the Pink Glove.
Pink Starfish - (see also "Chocolate Starfish") Another name for the asshole.
Pirate Maker - When your sitting on a girls face and she's sucking on your nuts, you start poking her in the eye with your cock.
The Pirate's Treasure - While fucking your girl in the ass, you strike a hefty load of shit. After you've found this buried treasure deep in her booty, you scream, "Argh!", like a pirate.
Pittsburgh Platter (see also Glass Boat, Plating) - When a girl lies underneath a glass coffee table and a guy takes a shit on top of the table.
Plating - (see also Glass Boat, Pittsburgh Platter) Take a clear, glass plate and place it on your partners face, then shit on it. It gives them a nice view without all the messy cleanup. How come you don't see that on any Dawn commercials.
Play-Doh Fuzzy Pumper - A Rusty Trombone, during which the recipient shits into the Trombone player's mouth, simulating the hand crank action of the Play-Doh Fuzzy Pumper toy.
P.O.D. (Post Orgasmic Depression) - The overwhelming regret felt immediately after you blow your load with a chick you really didn't want to fuck in the first place.
Polar Bear (aka "Snowjob", "Chilly Willy") - Blowjob involving ice cubes.
The Police Chief's Daughter - Get an anal virgin and fuck her up the ass in a public place i.e. The Mall, or a Base Ball Stadium. She'll most likely scream really loud causing you to get caught and arrested... just like if you just fucked the police chief's daughter
Poop Troop - The act of having anal sex.
The Popcorn Trick - First, take your girlfriend to the cinemas, for a nice romantic date. Buy a tub of popcorn, wait until the lights dim, and carefully make a hole in the bottom on the tub. Then, inconspicuously insert your penis through the bottom of the tub into the popcorn and casually offer some to your bitch. When she digs in, she will find nice surprise. Who doesn't love buttered popcorn?
Poppin' the Ass Cherry - (we thought this was a little too literal but oh well...) Having anal sex for the first time.
Porcelain Kiss - When you are taking a shit in a public washroom and your unit accidentally touches the rim of the bowl. Hmmm, STD, bacteria, both? Who knows?
Porcupine - Screwing a girl that has not shaved her legs in about three weeks.
Potato Chip (California Potato Chip) - Fuck the hell out of yo bitch, then bust a nut all over her back. Call it a night and then proceed to go to sleep. When you wake in the morning, Peel the hardened Jizz of her back and serve it to her for breakfast.
Power Situp - When you talk your boy into helping with fuckin' with somebody you hate. Get said asshole to get in the situp position. Place a towel over his eyes and tell him there is no way he can do a "power sit up". Hold the towel down while he vainly struggles to do a sit-up. At the last instant whip the towel off so he mashes his grill square into your buddies cornhole .......who should be pre-positioned in a crouch right over the stupid fucks face. Preferably right after he takes a horrendous grundy.
Prego BJ - Getting a blowjob from a yet unborn fetus whilst having sex on a pregnant chick.
Puerto Rican Fog Bank - While 69ing with your partner, release a cloud of sphincter fog directly into her nostrils.
The Pull Start - Put as many anal beads as possible into your partners tail end. Then when they least suspect it, pull them out like your starting a lawnmower.
Pulling The Goalie - When the guy takes out the female's tampon, puts it in her ass, fucks her pussy, and then puts the tampon back in after he "scores".
Pumpkin - The art of eating a girl out while she's on the shitter.
Punk Fake (aka "The Houdini") - During Doggy style sex, right before you come, pull out and spit on her back, she then "sighs: and turns around. Then you take the opportunity to blow your wad on her face!
Purple Mushroom - This occurs when a woman is giving you oral sex and you withdraw your penis in order to poke it back into her cheek. It should leave a lasting impression similar to a purple mushroom.
Queef - A well known, but sometimes embarrassing occurrence. Queefing happens when air gets trapped in a girls vagina, and makes a soft hissing, or farting kind of a sound while that air is released.
Quickie - The act of having sex in a hurry or on a time frame. ie. "I have to get back to work, this has got to be a quickie."
The Rake - It is when a woman uses her teeth to "rake" or scrape the shaft of a man's penis while performing fellatio on him.
Ralph Malph - puke all up in her snatch while munching her box.
The Ram - Doing the deed close to a wall (Doggie style for best effect) you ram her head into the wall for deeper penetration.
Rat Belly - Sticking your ball bag out your pants while keeping your cock inside. Your balls look like the bottom of a rat's belly. Do it when no one is expecting it. Great at parties.
Rat Tail - When a fag wakes up in the morning and a used condom is hanging out of his ass, thus creating a tail.
Ray Bans (see also "Arabian Goggles") - Put your nuts over her eye sockets while getting head. You're can is on her forehead. Yes, it may be anatomically impossible, but it is definitely worth a try.
The Ray Finkle (aka "The Scott Norwood") - While aiming to shoot a load between her eyes, you miss her totally and go wide right. Named for the Field Goal kicker who missed wide right.
Rear Admiral - When getting a chick from behind (with both partners standing), make sure you don't let her grab onto anything when she is bent over. Then, drive your hips into her backside so that the momentum pushes her forward. The goal is to push her into a wall or table, or have her trip and fall on her face. You attain the status of Admiral when you can push her around the room without crashing into anything and not using your hands to grab onto her hips.
Red Badge of Courage (see also "Red Wings") - When you go down on a girl while she is on her period, after this act has taking place you are said to have received your "Red Badge of Courage".
Red Wings (see also "Red Badge of Courage") - When you go down on a girl while she is on her period, after this act has taking place you are said to have received your "red wings".
Relative Humidity - The amount of sweat that rolls off your ass while you're fucking your cousin.
Reltny - In a man's restroom, the urinals often contain salt or deoderant tablets. A reltny is someone who sucks on them.
Remember 9/11 - When you straddle a girl stomach and titty fuck her but your holding both her boobs up by her nipples and blow your load all over her towers.
Resleaveing - A girl that has been used too many times is all loose with extra large beef curtains, you take a five pound ham, shove it up into the pussy and just pull out the bone.
Reverse Snowball - Eating a girls pussy after some other stiff just got done cumming inside her. Of course your dumb ass didn't know about it in the first place, but you kind of deserve it for eating that stinky jizzy pussy anyway.
Resuscitation - When a girl is asleep, carefully open her mouth so that she doesn't awake. Then, squat over her face and carefully place your shit hole on her lips. When the time is right, you let rip the biggest baddest fart ever known to man and see if it wakes her up. Great fun during those long sleepless nights.
Riding the Bull - A Texas favorite. Seduce the fattest girl at the party. Station 6-8 of your friends in the closet of an upstairs bedroom. When you get her up there and are going at it doggystyle you give the signal and everyone jumps out, turns on the lights and yells' "yee haaw ride the bull".
Riding the Hershey Highway (aka Taking the Old Dirt Road) - Partaking in anal sex.
Rim – 1) n. the outer, often curved or circular edge of something. 2) n. the outer often wrinkled and dark brown edge of the shit shoot. 3) v. (ing) the art of exploring this prune-like orifice with your tongue.
Ringing The Doorbell - Female Masturbation.
Road Head - The act of getting head while driving, one of my personal favorites
Road to Athens - Another colorful euphemism for anal sex
Rocky Balboa (see also "Rocky Balboa Title Punch") - Don't shower for 2 weeks, then diarrhea down her throat at any point during sexual contact.
The Roddy Piper - When getting your girl from behind, you toss the sleeper hold on her and knock her out ala Rowdy Roddy Piper. While nailing your unconscious victim, you get to simulate your life long dream of necrophilia. Now you never have to break into the morgue again.
Rodeo Sex (see also "Baby Rodeo" and "Butt Rodeo") - When you are doing your girl doggystyle, bend over and whisper in her ear, "your almost as good a lay as your sister..." Then try to hold on for 8 seconds.
Roman Helmet (aka "Roman Soldier") - Variation of Arabian Goggles, where a testicle is placed on each of the partners eyes and the penis along their nose.
Roman Shower - The act of vomiting on your partner during missionary or cowgirl sex.
Roman Soldier (aka "Roman Helmet") - You stand behind your kneeling girl, place your balls over her eyes, and let your shaft hang down over her nose... gives the appearance of the helmets Roman Soldiers wore.
The Romanian - Everyone knows that Romanians love to give head. But to do this right, you have to get head in a public place with a Romanian, then when someone spots you, spooge in her face and yell out "I'm a communist!"
The Roscoe - The act of using one's genitals as a bludgeoning device to upside the ho's head with your beefy billy club.
The Rose Creeper - Seductively brush a beautiful long stem red rose against your sweetheart's neck, breasts, and inner thigh. Slowly rub the rose along her smooth skin as you tenderly kiss her entire body. After working her into the mood for some deep love making, unzip your fly and pull out your raging boner. Begin to punish-fuck her dumper while whipping her with the rose and screaming nasty obscenities at her. I bet she never saw that coming.
Rotisserie - Getting done by 2 guys at once, one on each end: oral on one side, anal or doggy style on the other.
Rude Beneby - Get a girl/guy naked during foreplay, them make fun of them. It is rare that sex follows...
Russian Alarm Clock - The art of laying a log on your girl friends face while she's sleeping, she wakes up screaming, viola, the Russian alarm clock.
Russian Bird Feeder (see also the "New York Bird Feeder") - Eating a girls period muff whiles she’s shitting.
Russian Blow Job - Occurs in threesomes involving one guy and two girls. The girls take turns giving blowjobs to the man for a decided intervals until he cums, and we have a loser (or winner...however you see it).
Rusty Nail - This is good if your with a girl that does not like to swallow....When receiving a blowjob from a chick... just when your about a to cum make her step on a rusty nail giving her lockjaw...Her mouth will be stuck open allowing you to shoot your jizz in her mouth. -
Rusty Trombone (see also "The Boofter") - 1) Demanding oral pleasure immediately following anal hijinks with a woman. 2) the girl eats your asshole out and jacks you off at the same time.... similar to the slide action of a trombone... and the mouthpiece is all "rusty"
Sacking The Cook - A code phrase between guys to let your friends know you've just received a blow job. For example, "You know Vanessa? She just sacked my cook."
Sally Dog - The act of cock-slapping a bitch in the face.
Saluting The Colonel - After ramming your partners ass, you notice a corn kernel on the head of your cock.
Samoan Pile Driver - A sexual Position that occurs when the woman's back and the bed are perpendicular but she is upside down. The practitioner of the Pile Driver stands above the woman and points his shit due south, simply bending his knees for repeated bludgeoning. This process is repeated while screaming, Adaay.... goony, goony, goony... ABDAY...ABDAY....ABDAY..HA!" Repeat and rinse.
Sandbag - Under an assumed name in a tropical region, you meet a young hottie and engage in the well known cliche of sex on the beach. Just before insertion, remove the rubber (without getting caught of course), and proceed to bang away until you blow your load, without pulling out. As you dismount and prepare for departure, grab a handful of sand, throw it in her eyes, and run away laughing hysterically while leaving her blinded, butt-necked, and knocked up. Especially lots of fun when accomplished during the spring break season.
Sand Paper Treatment - When your girlfriend is sleeping run your forearm across her dry beaver as hard and rough as you can, shell wake up screaming like she just been scrapped with sand paper. Works great after a goodbye fuck on a chick you just caught cheating on you.
The San Fran Tickler - Straddling a girls head and titty fucking her while she tickles your asshole with her tongue.
The Santa Cruz - A timeless classic. Take a surfer girl, cover her in Mr. Zoggs sex wax, then proceed to beat her senseless with a surfboard. Once she's passed out, you jerk off on her face, stand with one foot on her, hold your hands in the air in the "hang ten" sign, and shout, "Yar, Dude!"
The Sardine - When you're eating out a 84 year old woman's pussy that hasn't been fucked in fifty years and her crusty old clit just breaks off and falls in your mouth. It will taste and look like a sardine.
Scabby D - The unfortunate occurrence for a male due to a practice of dry fucking in blue jeans sans undergarments. One of the most feared of all sexual accidents.
Scooter Pie - When one of your friends passes out drunk... you and your friends take turns rubbing your bare asses up and down his face.
The Scott Norwood (aka "The Ray Finkle") - While aiming to shoot a load between her eyes, you miss her totally and go wide right. Named for the Field Goal kicker who missed wide right.
Screaming Seagull (aka "The Veal Cutlet") - When a man is having sex with a girl on the beach, then pulls out, using the juices on his schlong to roll it around in the sand to collect it and then continue having sex.
The Screwnicorn - When a dyke puts her strap-on dildo on her forehead and proceeds to go at her partner like a crazed unicorn.
Seal the Envelope - When hooking up with a really drunk girl and she passes out before you cum, turn her over and blow your load all over her ass crack. When it dries, it will seal her butt cheeks together and she will have to pry them open the next day - hence, sealing the envelope
Search Party - When you and a partner are searching for a lost load that could be lost in her hair.
The Seatbelt - While one fag straddles his partners cock, he receives a blowjob from the fruitcake on the bottom.
Seeing Eye Dog - This one's tricky. When you get a blind girl to go down on you but instead she unknowingly sucks off her German Shepard.
The Self Shotty - The sexual derivation is when for several days after getting play, you jerk off to the memory of when you got some action. Derived from the weed smoking term of taking a blunt hit and then exhaling into a tube and then inhaling good ole THC again.
Seventy One - Basically, 69 with two fingers up the ass.
Seventy Two - A 69 with 3 fingers up her brown eye.
Shanghai Shampoo - Fuck a chick until you've built up a load large enough to paint a room. Blow it all in her hair, rub it in thoroughly. When it dries it will resemble the crunchy noodles often served with chop soy.
Shanghai Stirfry - when a girl gives you a blowjob, pukes all over your cock and keeps going.
Sharpshooter - Anyone that can shoot his magic cream with extreme accuracy. You gotta take his word for it, since you don't want him to demonstrate on your chin, unless of course you're into that sort of thing.
Shirley Temple - Pour a can of 7-Up on a girl's menstruating pussy and eat her out.
ShitSpit - The residue left dripping after a vigorous, saliva-assisted ass fingering.
Shitty Breakup - When you wanna dump your girlfriend in a mean way you fuck her in her ass and then make her give you a blowjob. Then after you cross the finish line you simply say, "Look, we gotta talk...".
The Shocker (aka "The Alien") (see also "The Spocker") - Two in the Pink and one in the Stink. Stimulate the clitoris with your thumb for extra voltage.
Shop Vac - When a dirty, talented tramp stuffs you're entire package (balls and all) into her mouth, and blows you with amazing suction power.
Short in the Cord - A "code" phrase used by the common man to refer to Testicular Tendon Tangle Syndrome. Ex. "Oh fuck! My nuts are killing me... I think I've got a short in the cord."
Shrimping - The term for licking or sucking your partner's toes.
Silent Alarm - You are banging a girl and you hear her husband pull up in the driveway.
Singapore Subway - When you stick a pvc pipe down a girls ass and run micro-machines down it.
Sixty-Nine - When two people perform oral sex on each other. Simulates the look of the numeral, "69".
Skull Fuck - During oral sex, reach down at your partner's face, and gouge out an eyeball. Proceed to take your dick and fuck the socket. After you splooge in the socket, go get a raisin and colored icing (the same color as the other eye), and make a replacement eyeball. Make her stay in that position until the splooge dries, and she has a semen-processed eyeball. ... please folks don't try this one at home.
Skiing - While facing in the same direction, a girl gets between two guys and jerks them both off, thus imitating some hardcore cross-country action.
Sleeping Bag - If you're going down on a really fat girl, you pull her enormous stomach roll of fat over your head.
Sleeping With The Fishes - A female version of the wet nap that is accomplished by rubbing her wet twat all over a guys pillow.
Slore – Both a Slut and a Whore, she will fuck you for money or attention
Slumpbuster - When a professional athlete finds the dirtiest, nastiest, fattest, most disease-ridden skank and puts the wood to her with the intent that it will break up a slump.
Smoking Pole - Oral sex on a male... no flame required
S'more - Threesome containing a black person, a white person, and a Hispanic person (or any other "graham cracker" colored individual.
Smuggling A Yo-Yo - Another term for camel toe/bear claw with the exception that you can actually see the outline of her lips through her pants.
The Snafu (aka "Coach Dale")- When a guy gets into the three point stance and a girl cups her hand around his balls and starts vigorously moving her hand from left to right. Then, after a thorough shake of the dice, she starts jamming her thumb up his ass while still juggling the nut sack.
Snake Skin (aka "The Lost Goat") - The act of staying inside her after sex until you go limp, then pulling out leaving behind your condom and its contents.
Sneak Attack - The act of coming up from the rear.
Sneaky Pete - While going at it full-force, pullout just enough to sneak back into the poopshoot without skipping a beat. most easily accomplished while having sex doggystyle. "Use caution: Without good aim, you could injure 'Pete'."
Sneezing Elephant - The act of blowing your load without your pole being completely erect. The name comes from the obvious similarity of the limp dick and an elephant's trunk, the cum thus representing snot.
Snerd Nurgling - The act of moving your anal lovers turds about within his/her lower intestine with your dick. Really popular with the lavender boys, hence the expression, "Oh Lance, Nergle me you Snerd"...
Snoodling - When an uncircumcised homo pulls his extra foreskin over the cock of another homo and proceeds to jerk him off. Those gays have way too much free time. Can be used at as a great derogatory term as in, "You Snoodler!"
Snot Rocket - When your girl is giving you head right before you bust shove your dick down her throat and watch it come out of her nose.
Snowball - After ejaculating in your partner's mouth, you make out and swap joy juice
Snowjob (aka "Polar Bear", "Chilly Willy") - Blowjob involving ice cubes.
Snowmobile - When getting a girl while she's on all fours, sweep out her arms so she falls on her face.
The Snuff - Lovingly fuck the shit out of your virgin or ragging girlfriend and wipe your bloody member across her face. Take a couple Polaroids, show them to your friends, and brag that you're a snuff film superstar.
Solpohbed - The act of agreeing to marry your girlfriend when she proposes to you; while she fucks you in the ass with a strap on!
Southern Trespass - Its when your fucking a girl and you switch holes without telling her.
The Sparkler - Get a double amputee with both legs clipped at the hip joints. Start fucking her either on a table top or standing and get her good and lubed .Now change position so that your on your back with her on top and give her two lighted sparklers. Spin her like the girl in the Chinese basket trick and enjoy. You have to keep her upright or risk breaking your crank and or setting the rug on fire. Safety glasses recommended.
Sperm Wail (see also "Spewphemism") - A verbal outburst during the Male Orgasm
Spewphemism (see also "Sperm Wail") - A verbal outburst during the Male Orgasm
Spicy Stanley - When a girl takes hot sauce and pours it on your cock. She then proceeds to give you a blowjob, making sure all of the hot sauce is gone.
Split Pissonality (see also "Double Dragon", "PEUM") - Post sex urination where you get a double stream out of one peehole.
The Spocker (see also "The Shocker") - Two in the pink and two in the stink
The Spoiler - The historic conquest of de-flowering some guys fiancée no more than one week before the wedding day.
Spring Cleaning - When, after a few days of no masturbation, you ejaculate in your sleep.
Squeegee - When your fucking a girl in the ass, when your about to cum, you stick a pin in one of her ass cheeks, thus making her clench up and cleaning all the shit off your cock as you pull out at the same time.
Stealin' me Lucky Charms - The act of swallowing cum.
The Stinger - When a girl is giving a guy head... mainly someone you don't like too much, sneak up behind the girl and pop a balloon right behind her head. She will freak out and hopefully if all goes to plan, bite down, thus creating a stinger.
Stingy Nut - When a chick isn't worth fucking; pull down her pants, bend her over, and jerk off all over her ass.
Stinky Coyote - When your going down on a chick and find a "basted wick" from who knows when.
Stirring Lunch - Another colorful euphemism for the act of anal sex (butt fucking for the masses...)
Stove Piping - Taking it in the Tush.
Stowaway - When you meet a tasty tourist, take her home and fuck her, unwittingly leaving her knocked-up. She soon leaves, unbeknownst to her that she's carrying a small castaway.
Straighten The Arrow - When you think one of your buddies is turning a little fruity, or you think he might be bi-curious or worse yet gay, just get all of your straight friends together and kick the living shit out of him. Fancy name for tough love.
Stranger - The act of sitting on your hand until it falls asleep, then you jerk off with it
Stranger On The Rocks - Numbing your hand by sticking it in a bucket of ice and then jerking off. Spanken not stirred.
Strangers In The Night - When you and your gay buddy each numb your hand (you should know how by now) and spank each other off. Thus eliciting the feeling of a hand job from someone else, from someone else.
Strawberry Milkshake (aka "Bizmark", "Clownface", "Jelly Donut", "Strawberry Shortcake") - when a guy blows his load on a girls face, Then swiftly punches her in the nose, causing it to bleed. Giving the appearance of a strawberry milkshake
Strawberry Shortcake (aka "Bizmark", "Clownface", "Jelly Donut", "Strawberry Milkshake") - when a guy blows his load on a girls face, Then swiftly punches her in the nose, causing it to bleed. Giving the appearance of a strawberry shortcake.
Stuffing The Cat - While fucking one of those loose-as-a-goose cunts, you stick random objects (fingers, dildos, tvs, etc.) to tighten it up so you can achieve orgasm.
Stuffucking - The act of "stuffing in" your limp, helpless member in hopes of getting it up. Potential causes: you're too drunk or she's too ugly.
Stumpin - (caution, this move requires imagination and balance). As you hover over a quadruple amputee, carefully insert what's left of her arms up your ass while using her knarled thighs to whack off. This should produce a stream of spunk which should land where a normal persons feet would be. You've now been stumpin.
Submarine Races - When you and a friend get together with two chicks and see who can get their girl off first by chowing down under.
Sud N' Fud - When trying to bang a girl, she gives that same old story, "I not that kind of girl.", "I don't fuck on the first date.", "I'm catholic.", "Stop asshole.", etc. etc... After hearing all this bullshit, you whip out your handy bar of soap. Then lather up her armpit (or any other joint you prefer), and proceed to fuck that instead.
Surfing - This happens when you nail a fat woman. As you watch the rippling effect of her rolls with every thrust, along with the feeling of being drenched, off balance, out of control, and in danger, you are given the sense of riding the ultimate wave.
Suicide Bomber (see also "Traveling Salesman") - Go home with a slore on what you know is a one night stand. Fuck her good a couple of times, go to sleep and when you wake up fuck her again. Soon, she will fall asleep again. When this happens take a shit in her bed and get up real quiet like so that she can't tell. Get the hell out. When she gets up and notices that you are gone she will think, "where did he go?? oh well he was a good lay." She will return home after a hard day at work and climb into her bed to find your friendly gift with her toes.
Suicide Mission - Fuck a chick wearing a condom, after you climax put the condom somewhere safe. Wait until she falls asleep wherein you blow the condom up like a balloon, you then scream suicide and as she sits up you pop the condom in her face, thus the suicide bomber. Useful on girls who don't go down.
Sunny Side Up - While having sex doggystyle, preferably on an empty stomach, pull out and ejaculate in curve of her back. Then, induce vomiting over your semen. For "scrambled eggs" , stir with penis.
The Swamp Thing - After a three hour aerobic workout, dip you balls in horse manure and dangle them above your wife's face while she is sleeping
Swimmer's Ear - When a girl is giving you a good sucking and right before you erupt, you remove yourself from her mouth, place your purple head in her ear, and fill her ear with some sweet love seed. Hopefully, you will give her an infection.
Swoosh - After you take a shit in the toilet and don't flush, you proceed to go at it doggystyle, then when you orgasm, put her head in the toilet and flush.
The Sword in the Stone - Before boffing a girl doggystyle, put crazy glue on your hammer. When its dry, scream out "Excalibur" and have all your friends run into the room and try to pull it out. Whoever does it first, gets to bang her next.
Syracuse Orangeman - Before you go down on a girl, eat an entire bag of Cheetoh's. After you chow down on that muff for a while it'll take on that orange color, and look like the furry mascot for the Syracuse Orangemen.
Tabletime - This is when you are bending someone over a table doggy style, and right as you are about
to cum in the heat of the moment you ask them "What time is it?" When they look back at you confused and say, "What?" You then slam their head into the table and say "It's Tabletime Beeeiotch!!!"
Tailgate Party - Jack off before you see the bitch you are going to fuck.
Taint - The spot between a woman’s cunt and her asshole. Called the taint because "taint her twat, taint her asshole". A.k.a the chinrest.
Taking the Old Dirt Road (aka "Riding the Hershey Highway") - Partaking in anal sex.
Talking into the Mic - While getting head from a girl, reach down and grab her hair and say, "Oh yeah baby, talk into that Mike". She resembles a person talking into a microphone. A strictly class move. She'll respect you for it afterwards.
Tangy Lemonade - Drinking the Yellow Enema
Teabag - The act of dropping your testicles onto your partners face and/or mouth
Tea and Cocoa - ( See “Cocoa and Tea”) After doing the “Dog in a Bathtub” – you plop your buttstained basted balls into your ho’s mouth
Team Player - Some skank that has been nice enough to fuck you and all of your friends.
Ted Williams (aka "Walt Disney") - Freeze your crank until it is frozen. Then do a chick with your frozen shaft. It will feel like she is having sex with Ted Williams.
Texas Tornado - When a guy crosses his first 2 fingers while finger-banging a chick.
Thanksgiving - Just like the holiday, Thanksgiving is when you do a girl and then she puts her two big butt cheeks on your face like holiday hams. An overcooked thanksgiving is similar to this but instead of just putting the cheeks on your head she farts on it too.
Three-Eyed Turtle - Basically plug every orifice of a girl in the following manner: thumb in ass, fingers in pussy, and dick in mouth.
The Three Finger No Look - When three guys are in a hot tub with one girl and each one takes turns fingering her without ever looking at her, so she doesn't know where its coming from.
Three-tard - When a group of retards go at it. Usually found in group homes for special people.
T-H-O (see also "Forever T-H-O") - Titty Hard On. You know like the guys hard-on, only with nipples. Happens mostly when a woman's titties are cold or when she is really horny. Guys get it too but no one really cares.
Throne of Lightning - This is done by fucking a girl while you shit in a toilet. When you're going to blow your load, turn her over and dunk her head in the toilet, while she's bobbing for your turd plummet a river of semen in her ass. Not to be confused with "Ride the Lightning," a Metallica album
Tickle Me Elmo - When the chin hairs of a skanky bitch tickle your nutsack during fellatio. Not about to start a Christmas craze any time soon.
Time Travel - Fucking around the clock.
Times Square Shuttle - fucking a girl with your friend and switching from mouth to vagina and vice versa.
Titanic - 1) noun. A girl who is likely to "go down" the first time out.
2) verb. After hours of passionate lovemaking in the pool, DROWN the bitch!
The Toboggan - You're screwing a chick from behind at the top of the stairs. As you climax, punch her in the back of the skull, knocking her out, grab her arms and ride her down the stairs like you're on a toboggan.
Toilet Paper Roll - When two guys are fucking a woman on her hands and knees, one in the yapper and one in the snapper or crapper, and the two guys clasp hands and get the gal bouncing between them like how a toilet paper roll can flutter.
Tombstone 69 - while having standing 69 with her upside down, wait till you cheeze then exclaim "tombstone" and drop her on her head WWF style. With any luck she will proceed to expel "angry dragon" style as well because of the impact. Important note: make sure your dick is not in her mouth anymore when you tombstone her
Tony Danza - You are banging away doggy style and at the penultimate moment you pull out and yell "Whose the boss?" Shove it in her ass, donkey punch her, blow your load and say, "Tony Danza!!!!!".
Topeka Destroyer - The act of vomiting directly onto your partner's head while receiving fellatio.
The Tortoise - When you eat out someone who doesn't have pubic hair yet - i.e. you got there before the hair (hare) did.
Tossing Salad - A person is forced to chow starfish with the help of whatever condiments are available, i.e. Jello, jism, etc, originally a Prison Term, but somehow has crossed over to mainstream as the act of licking ass.
Traveling Salesman (see also "Suicide Bomber") - Go home with a slore on what you know is a one night stand. Fuck her good a couple of times, go to sleep and when you wake up fuck her again. Soon, she will get in the shower. When this happens take a shit in her bed and make the bed up so that you can't tell. Get the hell out. When she gets out of the shower and notices that you are gone she will think, "where did he go?? oh well he made the bed, what a nice guy." She will return home after a hard day at work and climb into her bed to find your friendly gift with her toes.
Trifecta (aka "Triple Crown of Sex") - In the yapper, the snapper and the crapper all in the same session.
Triple Crown of Sex (aka "Trifecta") - In the yapper, the snapper and the crapper all in the same session.
Tropical Wind - When getting your asshole eaten out by a worthless tramp, you break wind.
True Love (aka "Yellow Enema") - When your sex partner allows you the ultimate pleasure of peeing in their butthole.
TSB - A code word for a guy who is suffering from desperation. We would say he had a severe case of TSB - Toxic Semen Buildup.
Tucked In - When your father or other male relative stops by your room at night to, "tuck himself in."
Tuna Melt - One of the sickest things we have ever received... You're down on a chick, lapping away, and you discover that it's her time of the month. By no means do you stop though. When the whale spews, tartar sauce with a hint of raspberry smothers your face.
Tupperware Party - When thee guys are triple-teaming a chick...one with his penis in her mouth, another in her vagina, and the third in her anus. So named because she is sealed 'airtight'.
Turd Hammer - Another name for the protruding item going into the anal cavity. ie "Hammer the Turd".
Turkey Neck - What occurs out of the stinker from too much anal.
Turkey Shoot - When you're coming, come on her face and let it drip off her chin so it looks like that red shit on the turkey's chin.
Turkish Prison - Where you are so desperately horny you will nail anything without the need for alcohol, dates or nerves. "He's so bad off, he's in a Turkish prison."
Twisted Sister - Have your dominatrix girlfriend dress up in some hot black leather gimp wear and proceed to handcuff your hands behind your back and then force you to your knees. Unsuspecting, diminutive, and cradled over with your ass is in the air, she then gives you the most erotic enema of your life. Now that's some great S&M fun.
Twinkler - The act of 69-ing a girl next shoving your dick into her mouth hard, then you watch her asshole "twinkle" as she gags.
Under Dog - After a hard session at the gym, your armpit muscle begins to twitch; thus giving you the ability to jerk a guy off with your armpit muscle.
Upper Decking - The act of removing the lid of a toilet and taking a deep shit in the tank. Every time the toilet is flushed after that brown, shitty water comes out leaving the owner wondering "what the fuck is wrong with my plumbing?" The trick is to wipe and throw the toilet paper in the bowl forcing them to flush. Perfect for parties and bars
Up on Blocks - When a women is on her Period, The term comes from a car under service. It is undrivable because it is "up on blocks"
The Vacuum - Get into "The Wheelbarrow" position and walk around the room, banging away, whilst commenting on the state of the floor, saying things such as "look at the bits you missed".
Vaginal Seizure - This is when you have finished making love to a woman, busted inside, and she uses her vaginal reflexes to push out your love gravy.
Valsalva - The act of pinching shut (with thumb and forefinger) a woman's nose while receiving fellatio; most effective when employed just prior to the release point due to the gag reflex and ensuing swallow that the woman is forced to do to continue breathing. A great first date ploy, as it sets the stage for what the rules of engagement will be going forward.
Veal Cutlet (see also "Screaming Seagull") - When a man is having sex with a girl on the beach or a sandbox, then pulls out, using the juices on his schlong to roll it around in the sand to collect the breading and then continue having sex (hence the penis is the breaded veal cutlet)
Vegetarian Hot Lunch - A variation of the Hot Lunch in which the diner stretches a piece of saran wrap over her mouth such that chewing (for texture) is possible, but no actual contact with waste product occurs.
Volcano - Blow your load on someone's ass. Then wait for them to fart and cause the cum to spurt out.
VOD - The medical term used when a patient overdoses on viagra and can't get wood anymore.
Waffles with Ice Cream - Hit a chick from the behind with her face pressed up against a chain link fence. Before you climax, turn her around and spill it all over her face, still with the marks from the fence- hence, waffles with ice cream. This can also be done by pressing her back or rear against the fence.
Wake Up Call - Waking up in the middle of the night with the hard on of your life. You then turn to your fast asleep partner and dry fuck her ass into oblivion. The clincher to performing a wake up call is to act like nothing of the sort happened in the morning. E.g. "Sweetheart, what's that on your back?"
The Walk Of Shame - When all of your buds see you walking home in the morning from the house of the nasty bitch they begged you not to fuck the night before.
The Walrus (aka "The White Dragon") - When you come in a girl's mouth, then cover it with your hand and punch her in the tummy. The jizz'll squirt out her nose and give her the appearence of having tusks.
Walt Disney (aka "Ted Williams") - Freeze your crank until it is frozen. Then do a chick with your frozen shaft. It will feel like she is having sex with Walt Disney.
Water Sports (see also "Golden Shower") - Any involvement of Urine in sex
The Wet Biscuit (see also "Ookie Kookie", “Mushy Biscuit”) - 4 or more guys in a circle jerk and a biscuit is in the middle. The last man to jizz on the biscuit has to eat it.
Wet Jessy - Sneak into a girls bedroom while she's sleeping and Jack Off on her.
Werewolf - When 2 guys hold down a chic, and a third guy bends down in tea bag position spreading his cheeks across her face. He then rips ass. Her face will then resemble a werewolf.
Western Grip - When jerking off, turn your hand around, so that your thumb is facing towards you It is the same grip that rodeo folks use Hence, western.
Westside Glaze - Same as the eastside glaze, but the majority of your jizz lands on the left side of her face.
Wet Nap - When you let your load out on a girls pillow, and then make her sleep on it.
The Wheelbarrow - Man and woman are going at it doggystyle on the floor, then the man grabs the woman's legs and stands up, leaving the woman's arms on the ground, and starts running around the room, continuing to bang away...
Whistling Dixie - After you bang a chick, snuggle and let her get comfortable. Right as she is about to fall asleep, scream "The South Will Rise Again!" and shove it in her starfish.
Winnie the Pooh - When you are banging a broad Doggy-Style and you shove your fist up her ass... it proceeds to get stuck, just like Winnie the Pooh in the cave.
Winter Bush - Common to the winter months, bush sometimes grows wild during that time.
Wizards Sleeve - Another word for a large cavernous vagina
The Wooden Indian - Next time your banging a gook, stuff an old dime store wooden Indian up her cunt 'till she's dead. Then throw her in front of a truck. I call this the wooden Indian I think you will too. Great around the holidays. In the event an officer of the law should catch you, just mutter incoherently about Pearl Harbor and Nazis. You're sure to get off.
Woody Woodpecker - While a chick is sucking on your balls, repeatedly tap the head of your cock on her forehead.
Wrecking Ball - While getting head in the shower, swing from the curtain rod, attempting to the knock woman’s head off with your hard cock and swinging sack.
Xena - An ambiguously gay female. Is she gay? is she straight? is she bi? Often arises when she turns down a guy who does not accept rejection well.
Yellow Enema (aka "True Love") - When your sex partner allows you the ultimate pleasure of peeing in their butthole.
Zebra (see also "Oreo") - When two black people enjoy one white person.
The Zombie Mask - While getting head from your favorite, unsuspecting, trash-barrel whore, tell her you want her to look right up at you with those pretty little eyes" when you blow your load. Then, just when you're ready to spew a good week's worth of goo, blast that hefty load in both eyes. This temporary state of blindness will produce the zombie effect as she stumbles around the room with arms outstretched, and moaning like the walking dead.
Zorch - One who sucks farts out of an asshole.
ABC's - A fairly standard rating system by which all women can be categorized:
A - I'd bang her silly.
B - I'd let her swallow my hot load.
C - I wouldn't fuck her with someone else's dick.
Abe Lincoln - Doggy style sex, Just before you climax, give her a donkey punch, then while she is knocked out, roll her over and jizz all over her chin and face, shave off her pubes, and sprinkle in the beard region of her jizz covered mug.
Access Denied Error - When you and your pal are double-teaming a chick, he's got her from behind, you've got her mouth. Selfishly, he drops his load in her, thus preventing you from using that input later (a.k.a. Blocking the Box, Road Closed Due to Bad Conditions).
Afterburner - Get well-positioned with her. Missionary or doggie works OK, here. JUST as you cum, cut a BIG fart and light it with a match. Good for an extra inch or two.
Airplane Blonde - A blonde who has bleached/dyed her hair but still has a 'black box'.
Airtight - A woman is said to be airtight when her anus, vagina, and mouth are all full of penis.
The Al Bundy - This activity is recommended for every married scum out there who's trying to do the right thing. While out with the boys you realize that you are surrounded by meat melons. To keep your mind off the screaming beaver go up to hottest hole in your grasp and begin to entertain her with your sharp wit. Classic one liners like "say your a toilet" & "put it in your mouth" or the always popular "show me your bush" should quickly win her over. The result is consistently a hearty kick to the nuts... and when you untangle them from your intestine, thank her for saving your lousy marriage.
The Alien (aka "The Shocker") - Two in the Pink and one in the Stink
Alaskan Fire Dragon - Another good take off is one of the angry dragon that is called the Alaskan fire dragon. When a girl is giving you a blowjob, cum in her mouth unexpectedly and plug up her mouth at the same time. Then whisper in her ear "I have syphilis" so she spews it out her nose.
Ambush - Insert your thumb in the pink, your pointer finger in the stink, and try to bust trough the skin inside. - Smalls, Pennsylvania
Anal Boot - An anal boot is when you take a pitcher of beer, everyone spits in it, someone stirs it with their cock and then the mixture is poured through the crack of a man ass into the waiting mouth of the loser of a bet or drinking game.
Anal Seizure - This is when you have finished making love to a woman (in her ass...), busted inside, and she uses her anal reflexes to push out your love gravy.
Angry Dragon - 1) While receiving oral sex from a female, the male pulls out and shoots his load up her nose. The female then snorts to expel the semen from her nasal cavity, henceforth creating the appearance of an "angry dragon". 2) While receiving a blow job, cum in her mouth, right when she's about to swallow, you smack her in the back of the head with a free hand and she'll spew it out her nose, hence the appearance of an "Angry Dragon".
Angry Pirate - This is where you proceed to perform a "Houdini" on a girl. With exquisite aim you launch your load into her eyeball. You then swiftly kick her in the shin and run for the nearest exit. As you look back over your shoulder, it will look like you are being chased by a one eyed, one legged "angry pirate".
Antlers - Wide, flat, flapjack titties that come to a sharp point at the nipples.
The Andretti - When receiving road head, swerve the car left and right. Her weight shifting will enhance the sensation. Risky maneuver, so it's best if done with a toothless cocksucker and a open road.
Arabian Goggles (see also "Ray Bans") - The bizarre act of stretching your scrotum across your lover's face and placing one testicle upon each eye. Voila! Arabian Goggles!
Arabian Goggles with Bad Flavor - Putting your balls in her eye sockets and farting in her face. Can be performed in either direction, good while getting head, even better when getting your salad tossed.
Atomic Nut Drop - You're getting brains from a chick while standing near a window, at least on the 3rd floor. Right as you are about to spurt, you throw her out the window, and proceed to spurt, trying to hit her body three or more stories down
Aussie Kiss - Same as a French Kiss, only you do it "Down Under"
Australian Death Grip - The act of grabbing a woman by the haunches/crotch and staring deeply into her eyes until you're slapped or kissed.
The Avalanche - After a girl gives a really fat guy a Blow Job, he drops his stomach on her head like an avalanche. Smaller guys can give a snowstorm or a flurry.
Baby Rodeo (see also "Butt Rodeo" and "Rodeo Sex") When riding your partner who's about to blow his load, give some good pounding strokes and when he's at the point of no return scream out 'Let's make a baby!'. See how long you can hold on, while he tries to throw you off his erupting cock. One night stands should only be considered for the more advanced rider.
The Bait N' Tackle - The sailors used this one in the old Navy days. Before you go off for a long, lonely voyage, get yourself a tall jar and fill it completely with earthworms. When you get lonely, open the jar and fuck away. The earthworms will provide some slithery stimulation, and your protein load will keep them nicely fed. Gone fishing!
Balloon Knot - Another name for a real tight asshole, which kinda resembles a balloon knot.
Ballsacking - Takes some luck of the gene pool, but if you're able to do it, always great fun. While you are straddling her, take your nutsack and spread it out over her face like pizza dough.
Baltimore Beatdown - When you are banging a chick, you tear off her arms and legs, and so she thus becomes one giant boner. That is, her torso is now and extension of your bone. For added effect, begin punching the chicks torso now propped up on your bone until she pukes. Thus, it is as though the gigantic boner is coming.
The Barbara Bush - Fucking a 93 year old grandmother.
Basted Wick - When a woman forgets she has a tampon in and you pack it deep with a thrust and then cum all over it.
Bate-Rape - Go home and furiously masturbate while thinking about a girl who does not like you, a girl who may feel violated by your lusty thoughts and desires. It becomes Bate-Rape when you inform her about your previous night's masturbatory session.
Bear Claw - A synonym for extremely large pussy lips.
Bearded Lady - This is kinda like the dirty sanchez, except you do it doggy style then get shit all over your unit, and then wipe it across her face to make it look like a beard.
Beef Curtains - The shanked out remains of the labia after being stretched like Play-Doh from an hour or so of jimmy-jam.
Beer Dick - This is what most guys get after a good night of drinking. They tend to fuck anything with a pussy while experiencing beer dick.
Beverly Hills Whiffer - This move is restricted to those women who think they're God's gift to the world. Find a woman of the above description. Take her home and start doggie styling her. When you're about to blow, corkscrew two fingers into her ass, scraping as much shit as you can from her. Pull out your fingers, reach around her head to stick one finger in each nostril. Pull her head back so she can see you while you yell "So, you think your shit don't stink now ?!"
Big Rack Attack - Compulsion that occurs with men in monogamous relationships with chicks with munchkin tits, thus neglecting man's need to fuck/suck massive mammaries. The hunger for huge jugs distorts men's judgment, resulting in cheating with ANYTHING with big cans, i.e. fat chicks, ugly bitches, pre-op transsexuals with implants, etc.
The Big Top - Next time your at a carnival drag out the Fat Lady and a couple of midgets. Take them to the roof of tallest building in the city. Then have that fat ass shave each kickstand completely bald. When she gets done... role the nude little bastards in a ball and position them on each side of you. Stand up straight and start spitting up in the air while yelling "I'm a cock.... I'm a cock". Congratulations you are now the biggest dick in town. Before getting off the roof, FIST the fatty in the can and chuck the midgets off head first. This trick is slightly more fun while wearing a red rubber nose.
Bill Buckner - While receiving head standing up, the girl cuts off your balls and rolls them through your legs.
Bizmark (aka "Clownface", "Jelly Donut", "Strawberry Shortcake", "Strawberry Milkshake") - When a girl is giving you head, right before you blow your load, you pull it out of her mouth and blow it on her face. After you blow your load on her face you punch her in the nose with your free hand. Then you take your hand and smear the blood and seamen together to make the BizMark.
Black Man's Kryptonite - Simply White Women. When you put this stuff out in a crowd, there is always a black man waiting to get his 'nose' dirty.
Blast Zone - While fucking a girl from behind, replace you dick with a stick of dynamite and then proceed to light.
Bloody Mary - When a drunk guy is going down on a girl and without even realizing it after he's done, he realizes Mary was very Bloody.
Bloody Wheelbarrow - Your doing a girl doggie style and then u take her arms from underneath her so her nose hits the floor, then u take her arms and use them as the wheelbarrow handles.
Blow Job - When a male receives oral sex.
Blue Crush - Use this only on a girl you have a crush on, but keeps turning you down. Have a party at ur place, and toward the end of the night, take her to a secluded area of your apartment. Have a cement brick in hand. If performed correctly, she will wake up with a sore ass and a blue contusion on her head, hence your crush is now Blue.
Blumpkin – (see Blumpy) Receiving oral sex while sitting on the toilet
Blumpy – (see Blumpkin) You need to find a real tramp to do this right. It involves having her sucking you off while you are on the shitter.
BobFoc - Body Off “Baywatch”, Face Off “Crimewatch”. Pretty much self explanatory here.
Bone of Contention - A Hard-On that starts an argument, ie. your girlfriend catches you with a stiffy while watching Olympic Figure Skating.
Bonemelter- Any word, deed, object, or person that will deflate a hard cock in 1 second flat. For
example, the sight of your grandma naked is a the original bonemelter.
Boofter (see also "Rusty Trombone") - The anal to the oral. The guy does the girl in her ass then she gives him head.
Boogerhook - Any chick with a ferocious beak, snotlocker, or nose to you laymen!
Boston Red Sock - A condom used during that time of the month.
Boston Steamer - The act of ending a relationship by depositing a steaming pile of feces on the back of a sleeping lover after a night of passion followed by a hasty departure.
Boston Tea Bag Party - When more then one guy takes turns teabagging a girl. Just at point of climaxing it is important to yell "The British Are Coming".
Bottle Rocket - Jizz in a girls beer then let her drink it without knowing about the special treat.
Bowling Ball - When the chick is on top and you're ready to switch positions, let her dismount and quickly reach under her sticking your thumb in her star and index and middle finger in the pink box and throw her off the bed!!
The Brain - When you pull out your sack in a crowded bar and squeeze one ball through the gap created between your thumb and first finger....as the little guy pops out damned if he don't look just like a brain.
Brazilian Flapjack - The act of Blowing one's love sauce on their partners sternum and letting her bake in the sun. The partner will then return later and peel off the cumjack and feed it to the craving slut.
Breakfast at Tiffany's - the act of eating a soft-boiled egg from your girl's pussy.
Breakfast In Bed - When coming across a hot chick sleeping, start jerking off, and before you blow it, throw your cock in her mouth, slap her in the face to wake her up, then bust your load down her throat.
Bridle - While banging a whore doggy style, hook your pinky fingers on either side of her mouth and pull back.
British Pound - When two British men double team a girl. However they must scream "Hail to the Queen" every time they switch positions.
The Bronco - You start by going doggy style and then just when she is really enjoying it, you grab her tits as tight as possible and yell another girls name. This gives you the feeling of riding a wild bronco as she desperately tries to buck you off.
Brown Bagging It - Sometimes you meet a girl with a body like there's no tomorrow but a face like a mangy dog. Don't let that body go to waste and let her hideousness stop you from fucking her though. Just draw the smiley face on a brown paper bag, place it over her head, and fuck away while keeping your composure and piece of mind.
Brown Bag Special - The act of wrapping a girl up or placing her in a burlap sack up to her neck so that she is immobile and her head is sticking out. Straddle her and repeatedly smack her about the face with your limp hog.
Brown Glove - While having sex doggy style, punch her in the kidneys. Her rectum will open quickly where upon you shove it in her ass unlubricated. When you pull out you take part of the rectum with you hence the brown glove.
Brown Necktie - You're about halfway through ass-wrecking a chick, and instead of filling up her keister with your demonseed, you pull out and proceed to tittie fuck her, leaving a brown streak between the funbags.
Brunski - When a man puts his face between a woman's breasts and quickly moves his head back and forth while saying "Brunski" in a very drawn out and exaggerated manner. (There are many other variant names.)
Buckeye (aka "Bullseye") - Whenever a chick is bent over you yell "buckeye" and ram your thumb up their ass.
Budgie's Tongue (see also "The Little man in the Canoe") - Euphamism for the clitoris.
Bukkake - (Japanese derivation) When a naked chick lays in the middle as 15 or more guys jerk off over her and try to all cum at the same time, covering her.
Bullseye (aka "Buckeye") - Whenever a chick is bent over you yell "Bullseye" & ram your thumb in their ass.
The Bullwinkle - The sign given to a friend in hiding while doggie styling' some chick. It is performed by placing both hands over the head, with palms facing out and waving wildly. Can be supplemented by shouting "Hey Rocky." (Make sure to use appropriate Bullwinkle voice tone.)
The Bunny (aka "The Elephant") - A guy takes everything out of his pockets pulls his pockets out so it looks like a pair of ears then un-zips pulls out his snout and has a girl suck away.
Bunny Boiler - An unhinged and overly possessive woman. From the rabbit boiling scene in the film "Fatal Attraction"
Burrito Hick-ups - Pinching out fractionized portions of farts while walking someplace with your date.
The Burrowing Skunk - You take a shit on the floor, then from the doggie style position, just before you cum you shove her face in to the pile of shit and cum down the middle of her back, hence the burrowing skunk.
Butt Rodeo (see also "Rodeo Sex" and "Baby Rodeo") - This is stupid, but it still made us laugh...When you're going at it with a girl, you flip her over real fast, start ramming her in the ass and yell as loud as possible "BUTT RODEO!" You then see how long you can ride her till she tosses ya off!
Butt Slam Jam - The sensational sandwich spread made from the act of anal love. Instructions - Combine healthy portion of KY Jelly and cock into her anal orifice. Mix thoroughly. Chill and serve.
Butter Face - When you see a chick with an awesome body, "but her face", is nasty.
Caged Monkey - Keeping yourself, for whatever reason, from getting any action for a long period of time.
Cajun Hot Stick - Fucking a girl doggy style while chewing tobacco. spit dip juice in the pit of her back, remove dick from snatch, commence to rubbing dick in dip spit, when good and covered insert dip spit covered dick back into the vag and continue fucking.
California Potato Chip - Fuck the hell out of yo bitch, then bust a nut all over her back. Call it a night and then proceed to go to sleep. When you wake in the morning, Peel the hardened Jizz of her back and serve it to her for breakfast.
California Raisins - If you're uncircumcised and pump someone up the ass, these are what you'll find under your foreskin afterwards.
Camel Toe (see also "Moose Knuckle", "The Mumbler", "Ninja Foot") - When a girl's pants are so tight you can make out the outline of her lips.
The Canine Special - Liberally apply peanut butter to your dick and call over the family dog. Lick Ubu lick. Good Dog. Arf!
The Carpet Cleaner - While banging a girl doggy style, tie her arms behind her back, lift up her hips, and run around the room pushing her face first across the carpet. Not recommended with large women.
Card Table - You bang the girl doggie style while play solitaire on her back.
The Carnival (aka "The 18th Ave. Feast") - While your double teaming a girl with your friend, one of you bang her in the pink and the other bangs her in the stink. At the same time pull out of her leaving the condoms inside. Count to 3 and at the same time start peeing out of your pistol and into your balloon. Whoever pops their balloon first wins the dirty stuffed animal.
Cell Block - When your in the shower and you take the removable shower head and stick by your ass and balls and beat off with your other hand.
Charity Fuck - Banging some loser who you have absolutely no interest in whatsoever, purely out of pity
for their pathetic existence.
Charleston Chew - When one of the scheister flick lovin' jokers places saran wrap over the mouth of their partner and poops in the saran wrap in their mouth. Thus creating a wrapped-up chocolaty delight, much in the vane of the candy bar favorite.
Charlotte's Web - Find a girl (it will help if her name is Charlotte), get her naked and have her get on her knees. Then place 8 guys evenly around her in a circle and have them all pleasure themselves to the point that they all cum at once. When they all simultaneously shoot their loads it looks like "Charlottes Web!" – Seven
Cheese Grater - When some bitch with braces gives you a blowjob.
Cherry Slushy - After a "Vaginal Seizure" you have a sweet tooth.
Chia Pet - After applying a Dirty Sanchez, smear Chia seeds across it. Then, put the recipient in restraints, water regularly, and check out the cool green mustache!
Chicken Brickin' - You'll need a live chicken and two bricks. First, fuck the chicken, then, while still mounted, take the two bricks and smash the chicken's head between them. The dying/dead chicken will thrash about for 30 seconds (or more if you're lucky) giving you a one-of-a-kind climax. [Rinse chicken well. Make soup.]
Chief Wahoo - Going down on a girl while she is on the rag. Bite the string and pull it out. Shake your head side to side creating red stripes below your eyes. Now you are a Navajo!
Chili Dog - The extreme act of shitting on your partner's chest then titty fucking her, henceforth the appearance of a "Chili Dog". - Twisted Pete, Ohio
Chilly Willy (aka "Polar Bear", "Snowjob") - Blowjob involving ice cubes.
Chipping For Par - When a girls pussy is so hairy you know you won’t find the hole on the first try.
Chocolate Slushy - After an "Anal Siezure" you have a sweet tooth.
Chocolate Starfish - (see also "Pink Starfish") Another name for the asshole.
Chocolate Pizza - Happily discovering hemorrhoids while eating a shitty brown eye.
Chocolate Pizza Milkshake (added 2/10/02) - Felching somebody with hemorrhoids.
Choda \chòdah\: n, - The sweet spot between a man's asshole and his ballsack.
Choda Fucking - Gay pastime in which a man fucks his partner between his legs and against the choda.
Christmas Turkey Carver - The act of sitting carefully behind your prone partner, inserting three fingers in her vagina, one in her ass, and voraciously pumping your digits in and out, maintaining a perfect L-bend at the elbow, and using only your rotator cuff as a power pivot
The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Taint - Pretending to be a Mormon just so you can impregnate virgins and breed them all out.
Cider Visor - Beer Goggles for the young drinker.
Cinderella - A girl who chokes at the Ball(s)
Circumcision - Kick your girlfriend in the chin when you find her blowing another man.
The Clapper - You're doin her doggystyle ,you rabbit punch her & knock her out & then start smacking her ass, this results in hours of "enlightening" fun if you have the clapper installed on the lights in the room.
Cleveland Steamer - The extreme act of shitting on your partner's chest. (sometimes used as a revenge act).
Cliterature – One handed reading material.
Clitourist - A man who won't stop and ask for directions in bed. ie: "Because of his fouled foreplay, Suzy realized that her new boyfriend was no experienced bedroom traveler, but merely a clitourist."
Clownface (aka "Clownface", "Jelly Donut", "Strawberry Shortcake", "Strawberry Milkshake") - When a girl gives you head and you blow your load all over her mouth. Then you proceed to punch her in the nose and make it bleed. The white mouth and red nose makes her look like a clown, hence the clownface.
Club Sped - Gang banging a retard. For those idiots out there, sped come from special ed.
Cockroft - When a girl jerks a guy off while sucking his sac, pubic area, or bottom of dick.
Cock-Stuffing - Apparently somewhat on the fringe in gay circles, but involves using thin, cylindrical items (thermometers, wire, rubber worms, etc.), and inserting them into the dick hole. Over many months, continue to gradually ream out the hole-at-the-head with larger items, thus ultimately allowing your "buddy" to obtain the goal of fucking your urethra.
Cocoa and Tea - After doing the “Dog in a Bathtub” - you plop your buttstained basted balls in your ho’s mouth.
Coin Purse - A pair of balls.
Cold Faithful - Blowing your visibly-steaming load outside in the winter-time, like when you get your cock sucked on a ski-lift.
Cold Lunch - The act of vomiting directly onto some chick's head while she's performing fellatio.
Compton Gangbang - You meet a young lady at the bar. She tells you she has a boyfriend, but she ends up going home with you anyway for a one-night stand. When you take her to your place, tell your friends to wait outside your bedroom door. Just when she's about to get off, your friends barge in the room and plainly beat the shit out of her. That should teach her not to fuck around. (Ladies, feel free to perform a Compton Gangbang on guys too. I know you've got some fat girlfriends to help you out.
The Concoction - First, ejaculate all over the floor. Next, have your psycho bitch girlfriend menstruate on your semen. Stir it with your finger until you get a nice thick pink mixture. Proceed to paint yourselves up silly, just as if you were in kindergarten again.
The Concrete Mixer - This is one is where you're tappin dat ass doggystyle, ramming her head fiercly into the drywall ahead. When you spew, shoot it into her drywall ridden locks. Presto, Concrete.
Cop's Delight - The act of taking a girl in the ass, pulling out, and spewing all over her "pastry buns", thus transforming her rump into the allusion of an oversized, quivering glazed donut.
The Corkscrew - Cross your fingers, middle over index. Twist your wrist back and forth and go to work on your desired orifice. With practice, you'll have the effectiveness of a drill press and within weeks you'll be able to bore through wood.
Corn - Originating from the fine campus of Cornell University comes this unique, rarely used term. Saying that a girl is "Corn" means, she is so fucking hot, so beautiful, so utterly drop-dead gorgeous, that you would happily eat the corn out of her shit. Can be used as a great pick-up line or friendly compliment, for instance; "Baby, you're more Corn than Green Giant", or "Damn bitch, you are Corn!"
Corn Flakes - This requires a really dirty partner. When you're about to cum, shoot it in her ear. If she's dirty enough, she'll have plenty of ear wax. Hopefully, the ear wax will float atop the semen. With the correct coloration, her ear will look like a bowl of milk and cereal.
Corn Hole Rows - Getting your butt hair braided.
Couch Bombing - When you fill a small ziploc sandwich bag with Crisco (or your favorite lubrication) and place it between the cushions on the couch. You then proceed to fuck the couch as if it were a woman...but no need to buy It dinner first
Country Blumpkin - A Modified Blumpkin taking place in an outhouse
Coyote - Waking up with a nasty one night stand, you realize you have to give her/him the slip. You realize your arm is wrapped around them. You would rather gnaw off your own arm than risk waking them.
Crackmaster - Hold down someone you despise until helpless. Find a big fat bastard. Feed him lot's of beans. Then get him to spread his huge disgusting cheeks over the person's face. Placing the cornhole directly on the tip of the nose. Cut wind like never before. Laugh your ass off.
Cream Fountain - When a guy leaves his jizz on a water fountain, where the water comes out, so the next person to take a drink gets cream and water.
Cream Graffiti - Yet another gay fad that occurs when both partners fuck each other up the wazoo, and
then squeal out a massive fart thereby spraying their boys' cream all over themselves.
Crisco Ass - The greasy feeling that your ass gets after farting all day long and almost shitting in your
pants. Also known as Baboon Ass. Not particularly a sexual act, but funny enough to receive mention.
Crossed Swords - A blowjob involving two penises at one time. Three becomes a Jawbreaker.
Crossing the Delaware - Go from tits (aka "New Jersey") to the "British Fort" (take a guess) for a surprise attack while the girl is sleeping.
Crucifixion (see also "Crucifixion with a stake in it", "Martyr") - Getting it in 4 directions. a dick in each hand, one in the mouth, one in the ass.
Crucifixion with a stake in it (see also "Crucifixion", "Martyr") - Same as crucifixion except another dong in the snatch.
Cuban Defector - This is a trick for guys who have girls that don’t like to raw dog it. While doing her doggy style, slowly pull out and pop it in the starfish for a second. Pull your johnson out of her ass, leaving the condom in her cornhole. Then slide it back into the right hole and proceed with the doggystyle, rubber free.
Cum Dumpster - A quadriplegic whore.
Cum Guzzling Sperm Burping Bitch - The once in a lifetime act when blowing a hot steamy load down the back of the girl's throat, proceed to give her a large cold bottle of your most favorite carbonated drink and make her guzzle it down. Then, shake her head vigorously back and forth to create the Cum Guzzling, Sperm Burping effect. A great way to impress your friends.
Cunt Trumpet (see also "Muff Trumpet") - While down on a chick, place your lips solidly over her love hole and blow, watch her stomach rise as she fills with air. Then, with a firm hand push down on her stomach to let all the air out like the beautiful sound of a trumpet. WARNING! - We were recently informed that if performed improperly, the Cunt Trunpet could result in death!
Daisy Chain - Partner (A) is sucking off or eating out partner (B) who is sucking off or eating out partner (C) and so on until the final person is sucking off or eating out partner (A). Partners can be gay, lesbian or straight.
Davey Crockett - A sexual maneuver in which you slip muscle relaxants into your gal's snizzpod, then slide your head in, thus wearing your partner's now-relaxed snatch-fur as a coonskin cap. Can come in handy on those cold winter nights.
Deranged Rabbit - Sticking your ball bag out your pants while keeping your cock inside and pull your front pockets out to look like ears. Hopping around helps the effect.
Detachable Penis - In the dark while you are fucking your woman, instead of your penis to penetrate her cunt, use a banana or cucumber, or something that resembles a penis. Make unusual sexual "grunts" Proceed to fall out of the bed, leaving the penis-like object inside of her. If done right, she will go in a panic thinking your penis fell off.
The Dexter - Same as "Tony Danza" except you dish out repeated blows to the head whilst yelling "YOU ARE STEUUUUUPID! YOU ARE STEUUUUPID! AND DON'T FORGET, YOU ARE STEUUUUPID!!" in the cartoon Dexter voice (Dexter's Lab on Cartoon Network).
Dicksicle - Put a condom in the freezer filled with water all day until it is good and frozen. Then, when banging a girl later that night, right when she is about to climax, jam it into her and watch her eyes pop out of her head.
Dingle Berry Crunch - Have a hearty bean burrito for lunch. Relieve yourself and wipe minimally. When it's time to bone ask to have your salad tossed while she pulls your chain from behind. Scream out: "They're Grrrrrrrrreat!" before she gets a face full of babies.
Dirty Bomb - A sexual act during which the male lays pipe to the female or other male doggystyle and flings a paper plate full of feces (turds), which have been warmed in the microwave for 90 seconds, and smacks the recipient in the back of the head at the point of climax!
Dirty DeVito - When a Midget is sucking your dick, blow your load in her hair. Using your cum, shave the top of her head so she looks like the Penguin. Then, give her a cane, top hat and some fish.
Dirty Gomez (see also Dirty Sanchez) - Placing your index finger into you anus and painting a mustache on yourself, like the frito bandito- similar to the Dirty Sanchez but fun when your lonely.
The Dirty Harry - After banging a girl all day, have her give you a blowjob on her knees. Right before your ready to shoot your load, pull your ".44 magnum" out of her mouth and say "I know what your thinking, 'did he fire off all his loads or does he have one left?' With all this excitement I forget myself."....Knowing you got one round of goo in your "handgun" left, ask her "Do you feel lucky punk?" and shoot her in the face with your load while humming the theme song to the Clint Eastwood classic.
Dirty Jose - The homosexual act of making your partner clean your pooh covered member after a hearty bout of anal play.
Dirty Sanchez - During Doggystyle sex, the male inserts his finger into his partner's anus. He then proceeds to smear the fecal matter onto his partner's upper lip to create a mustache made of poo.
Dirty Swirly - While boning a chick doggie style near a toilet (preferably one filled with a healthy load of shit, or some hot piss, or both), stick her head in the toilet and flush...she'll dig it.
Dirty Walrus - When you hold your partner by the ears and force their mouth around your cornhole and shit until it come out of the nose.
DiscoBeat - Having sex at a party in a room that shares a wall with the main room. Proceed to screw in such a way that produces the Thump Thump Thump of the bass at a club. (noise from headboard banging the wall or "The Ram").
Divot - While making out with a woman, put your hand down her pants and grab as many pubes as you can. Then pull as many pubes as you can from her bush while yelling "Fore!"
Doggystyle - When the female is on all fours and the males enters her from behind, similar to they way dogs cohort.
Dog in the Bathtub (see also "Giving a Cat a Bath") - While having sex, trying to stuff your balls in your partner's asshole. It proves to be as difficult as keeping a dog in the bathtub.
The Dolphin - When you're doin a chick doggystyle in the box you pull out and try to put it in her ass, not wanting it anal, she bends her head around to look at you and expresses her displeasure by going "eh-eh, eh-eh" much like a dolphin sounds.
Donkey Punch - (don't recommend trying this one in any circumstance) During Doggystyle sex, the male punches his partner in the back of her head right before he climaxes. The female then tenses up from the blow giving the male a better orgasm.
Double Bass - A sexual position in which the man enters the woman from behind, and then fiddles with the woman's nipples with one hand and her Budgie's Tongue with the other. The position is similar to that used when playing a double bass instrument, but the sound produced is slightly different.
Double Bagger - 1) This is for when your banging a fat, ugly bitch outdoors. Put a bag over her head and one over yours also. Just in case the bag on her head blows off. 2) This is for when you are banging a nasty piece of ass, you must cover her head with two grocery bags... just in case one rips.
Double Dragon (see also "Split Pissonality", "PEUM") - Post sex urination where you get a double stream out of one peehole.
Double Wishbone - The play in which, while in seated 69 position, the man inserts both index fingers into the vagina and both middle fingers into the anus followed by aggressively pulling outwards with both arms. Spitting in anus, while optional, is encouraged for future maneuvers.
Draw Mud - While trying to fart, you shit in your pants. An unfortunate, and highly secretive occurrence.
Drilling for Oil - Pushing a girls knees behind her ears, and pounding her baloon knot in a downward motion.
Dropping The Chalupa -Fill a sock with as many bodily excrements as you have available, and whack some slut over the head with it. Best accomplished if it's a surprise during some hot back-door action.
Dry Fucking (see also "Dry Humping") - The act of having sex with your clothes on.
Dry Humping (see also "Dry Fucking") - The act of having sex with your clothes on.
Duck Butter - The sweat that accumulates between your balls and ass.
Duct Tape Trick - Wrapping a hamster in duct tape so you can safely fuck it without the danger of a messy split.
Dussy - The act of tucking your limp penis behind and in between your legs, thus imitating a woman's genetalia.
Dutch Oven - While a girl is going down on you, you blow ass and pull the covers over her head .
Dutch Treat - The unexpected result of a Dutch Oven gone terribly awry. Can be very messy.
DVDA - The abbreviation for "double-anal, double-vaginal". This is the term used when a girl takes four cocks in two holes. A hard core porn industry norm.
Eastside Glaze - Same as the westside glaze, but the majority of your jizz lands on the right side of her face.
Eggs Danny Thomas Style - Danny Thomas used to pay hookers to defecate onto the top of a glass- topped coffee table, while he lay underneath and watched.
The Eiffel Tower - When two guys are enjoying a girl from both ends, then they reach up and high five over her, creating a mock Eiffel Tower.
The 18th Ave. Feast (aka "The Carnival") - While your double teaming a girl with your friend, one of you bang her in the pink and the other bangs her in the stink. At the same time pull out of her leaving the condoms inside. Count to 3 and at the same time start peeing out of your pistol and into your balloon. Whoever pops their balloon first wins the dirty stuffed animal.
The Electric Chair - Your psychobitch girlfriend decides she wants to try something kinky, so she props your stupid naive ass up in a chair, strips you down, and ties you up. After arousing you, she then takes a car battery and clamps two jumper cables to each nut sack. This causes you to have all sorts of synapses, spasms, and convulsions. She then mounts your Frankenstein and proceeds to get electrofucked. Warning! May cause erectile dysfunction after performed.
The Elephant (aka "The Bunny") - A guy takes everything out of his pockets pulls his pockets out so it looks like a pair of ears then un-zips pulls out his trunk and has a girl suck away.
Emersons - Code word for "nice tits" when you are trying to be subtle in public. (ie "Knock, knock..." "Who's there?" "Emerson." "Emerson who?" "Emerson nice titties...")
Eskimo Frenchbread Surprise - While nailing her doggystyle, you shove a frozen breadstick in her butt.
Esplanade - To attempt to explain your whiskey dick to a girl. You are obviously drunk.
ET - Next time you've got some dumb-ass fuck puppet ready to go, grab her purse and excuse yourself to the can while the drunken whore waits, lost in her own tangled bush. Get her mother's (or husband's) phone number from her purse while making fake shit noises. Flush the toilet for effect then grab the cordless phone on the way back to bed. As soon as you find yourself stabbing her bucket with your johny, dial the number and hold the phone near her head with same hand your pulling hair with and bang away. Make sure you mention her name and ask her things like, "Who's the biggest whore in the world?" and "You like fat cocks up your dirt road don't you?". Then throw the phone on the bed and tell it's for her. A nice topper to this maneuver is to take her money and throw her outside nude and lock the door. I like to threaten to kill her if I ever see her again. You might have your own closing. Have fun. Be creative. Get it – ET phones home.
Etch-A-Sketch - Trying to draw a smile on a women's face by turning her knobs (nipples)
The Exploding Thorns - A variation on the Shocker. Penetrate the chick with your fingers crossed (middle over index and ring over pinky) and then immediately uncross them while yelling out "BOOM!" Always remember the thumb for the clitoral stimulation.
Facial - Attacking some poor, helpless bastard and grinding his nuts into their face while slapping his cock on their forehead.
Fartin Whisky - When you fart so hard, a hemorrhoid starts bleeding.
Fat Lip - If you get poison ivy and finger a girl, her labia lips will swell. A la, the fat lip.
Fat Guy In a Little Coat - When your dick is too big for the girl's box.
Felching - The act of sucking semen from your partner's butt.
Fidel Castro - Take a shit on the chick's face, rip out some pubes and toss’ em on her grillpiece, and then top it off by having her "smoke your cigar."
Fire in the Hole - A revenge technique of pre-sex greasing up of your schlong with a mixture of Bengay and Tobasco Sauce.
The Fire Fighter - Fuck a hairy chick and before you blow your load light her pube's on fire and put it out with your cum.
The Fire Island - This consists of telling someone you're going to spunk on their face while they are asleep, only half-jokingly, and then when they don't believe you, doing it just to prove that you're that demented.
The Fish Eye - Working from behind, you shove your finger in her pooper. Thereupon, she turns around in a one-eyed winking motion to see what the hell you are doing.
Fish-Hook - When you pull back towards the pussy after you stick your finger up her anus.
Flaming Amazon - Whilst having missionary style sex, just before you jizz, pull out and set her pubes on fire, then proceed to douse the flames with your hose.
Flaming Pele - While having sex with a girl, right before you blow your load, you pull out, light her pubes on fire and then rare back and kick her in the cunt to put the flames out. hence the "Flaming Pele" after the great Brazilian soccer player.
The Flock of Seagulls - Don't bang or jerkoff for a week straight. Then when your catching head from a girl, shoot your monster load in her hair and style it the same way the 80's band Flock of Seagulls front man Mike Score so boldly did.
Flying Camel - As she is lying on her back and you are hammering her from your knees, you carefully balance yourself without using your arms to prop yourself up. You then proceed to flap your arms and let out a long, shrieking howl, much like a coyote.
Fly's Eyes - Like the "Deranged Rabbit", but without the pockets being pulled out, looks like a fly's head.
The Flying Dutchman - This didn't used to be a specific deviant sexual act, it was just a phrase that sounded dirty and would be shouted out during intercourse on occasion simply for the novelty factor. However, its popularity increased and it has now developed into a specific act, namely that of, just as you are about to blow a load, in any sort of sexual situation (even masturbation for those true pioneers who are constantly on the cutting edge of the sexual revolution) you begin to shout, "Here comes the Flying Dutchman!" This should confuse your sexual partner (or whoever is in hearing range) completely, sometimes causing interesting side effects.
Flooding The Cave - Inserting the penis into a woman's pussy and then urinating inside her. Applies to butt pirates as well.
Foggy Windshield - Spilling the man milkshake on the glasses of some four-eyed filthy.
Forever T-H-O (see also "T-H-O") - Very very rare. You find a woman whose nipples just tend to stay hard no matter what always giving a tease to those around her. It is even more rare in guys; and once again noone really cares.
Fortune Cookie - After nailing a chick on a one-night job, lodge the condom in her pussy for the next guy to find.
Fountain of You - While sitting on her face and having her eat your ass, jerk off like a madman. Build up as much pressure as possible before releasing, spewing like a venerable geyser all over her face, neck and tits. (Better in her bed)
Four Wheel Drive - Fucking, or getting fucked during the peak of your genital herpes flare up, cause while you fuck, it's a bumpy ride.
Freudian Slip - Shitting in your pants while farting. Farting is what you are doing, but shitting is your subconscious wants.
Frothy Walrus - As a man climaxes during a blowjob, he makes a joke, causing the blower to laugh, thus expelling the semen out his or her nose.
Frosting the Cake - When you are about to cum, blow a load all over her chest. Then take your dick and evenly spread the Jism around the breasts and over the nipples. Then stick some candles on it and start singing "Happy Birthday." Then blow out the candles
The Fudgecicle (aka "Hot Carl") - when you withdraw your shaft from the bowels of her anus and place it directly into her mouth for a cleaning. (used mostly in gay sex, so we hear)
Full Curl - The act of giving a "Dirty Walrus" while holding your partners nose closed until it comes out of the ears.
Fumilingus - When a man (or woman) performs cunnilingus on a woman and she farts directly in his/her face.
Fumunda Cheese - Referring to the crusty buildup of bacteria, wax, and crusted urine that forms on the underside of the penis. "Fumunda my nuts".
Fupa (aka "Gunt") - Acronym for "Front Upper Pussy Area". Defined as the big sack of fat that women have below the stomach and above the pussy. ie, "She has way too much fupage for me."
Fur Ball - Receiving a lodged pubic hair while performing oral sex.
Game Of Smiles - This game involves a bunch of men sitting around a table at their favorite bar and a woman giving random blowjobs underneath the table. Anyone who smiles has to buy a round of beer for the rest.
The Gardener - when you are doing a girl from behind, you pause and yank the hairs (weeds) from her asshole, then you proceed to "sow your seed" by cumming on her anus.
Gas Mask - While doing the San Fran Tickler, fart in her mouth.
Gay Poupon - The slimy see-thru brown coating a gay guy gets on his dick during some hot hairy butt
sex. I overheard people joking about this at a time when I would not have preferred to lose my appetite. Can apply to heterosexual butt action as well I suppose, but the term generally loses its humor.
Gaylord Perry - Going to only one knuckle during an anal probe is for wimps. Make this famous knuckle-ball pitcher proud and use multiple digits on that virgin corn hole. A minimum of 2 knuckles required (either on one finger or on multiple).
German Tourist - A chick so nasty and vile just for fun you and your buddies wind up fucking, pissing and shitting on.
Giving the Cat a Bath (see also "Dog in the Bathtub") - the act of trying to insert your testicles into a girls asshole, this is very hard to do, hence "giving the cat a bath"
Glass Boat (see also "Pittsburgh Platter") - Cover her face with plastic wrap and take a dump.
Glazed Donut - The act of taking a girl in the ass, pulling out, and spoo-ing all over her pastry buns, thus transforming her rump into the illusion of an oversized, quivering glazed donut.
Gloryhole - The well known term for a hole in a wall, or bathroom stall that a guy puts his dick through so some stranger can suck or fuck it.
Goalposting - In the missionary position, you pull both her legs up and rest her ankles on top of your shoulders, so they are like goal posts. More flexible women can enjoy this for a longer period of time.
The Gobstopper - When a girl is giving you head and when yer a bout to bust a nut she covers the hole of yer penis thus blocking the cum from coming out.
The Golden Gate Bridge - This involves a woman lying down (probably a hooker). A guy stands either end of her, pull out their cocks and proceed to both urinate arcs of piss into the woman’s naval area - hence creating a mock "Golden Gate Bridge"
Golden Shower (see also "Water Sports") - Any involvement of Urine in sex
Gorilla Mask - Shave off you pubes prior to sex, when you ready blow a load all over her face, then throw your pubes all over her face. voila....the pubes stuck to her face will cause her to resemble a gorilla.
Going For A McShit - Entering a fast food restaurant with no intention of buying food, you're just going to the shitter. If challenged by a pimply staff member, just tell them that you'll buy a McShit with Lies afterwards.
Goo Geyser - (aka "Old Faithful") Shoot your load in a girls belly button, once it is full press on her stomach making the load shoot out like a fountain... hence old faithful. gooey patterson Hollow out a round hole in a cantaloupe or other large melon, microwave it for about a minute, and fuck it like the prom queen you never got a piece of. When you are done blowing your baby batter and pull out, you get back a gooey shaft, hence the name, Gooey Patterson.
Good Waste Of $300 - If you're with some prissy bitch who only wants to fuck once during the night, demand to give it to her from behind. While ramming her ass hardcore, drop a Sony Playstation 2 on the back of her head. When she turns around and looks at you, say "Sweet! I've always wanted one of those!", and continue pumping away. She'll be so bewildered, you'll be able to get away with 5-10 more fucks that night. Expect a few weird looks, though.
The Graffiti - Have sex with a married/engaged girl, when she falls asleep write embarrassing , x-rated remarks (or something like "This bitch belongs to John" ) on her back with a big bold permanent marker. She goes home and has the "where the fuck were you" fight. later that day, when she showers the boyfriend/husband sees your graffiti and the fight starts all over again. For that matter the fights will continue for the newt two weeks. This works even better when a girl does it to a guy.
Grankefication - The act of relieving a pussy-drought by fucking inanimate objects such as microwaves, televisions, coffee tables, etc. "He's in his room Granking one off."
Gravy Sliding - The act of partaking in anal sex, diarrhea optional.
Greek - The act of using your "glue stick" (if you know what I'm saying) and gluing your gal's eyes closed with your man seed. E.g. "Hey guys, check it out, I just greeked her!" or "Sorry honey, but you asked for the Greek salad
Grilled Cheese - When a girl lets cum dry in her overnight, the next morning she has to peel her pussy apart to piss, it looks like she is peeling apart a grilled cheese sandwich.
Gunt (aka "Fupa") - When the gut overlaps the cunt.
Half Past the Monkey's Ass - Wearing your wristwatch on your cock. After a person asks you the time, you whip it out and say "Quarter to my balls." The fucking look on their face is just priceless.
The Halmstad Hook - This is a unique sequence of events named after a town in Sweden, where this apparently happens quite frequently. After dumping your spunk in her rear, the sauce is sucked out of the anus by the male. Once the sauce has transferred from her bowls to your mouth--the product that has been created is now known as "Swedish Cheese." The move is completed when the "Swedish Cheese" is transferred to the ladies mouth via a deep tongue kiss. You can cap this off with a swift stinging slap of her ass to show her how much you care and appreciate all her hard work.
Ham And Cheese Sandwich - Eating a woman's box after you ejaculate all over it. A delightful, tasty combination of her yummy meat curtains with your added cheesy topping is sure to appeal to anyone's appetite.
Hanging Brain - Generic term used to describe the act of exposing one's scrotum in public in a variety of creative and imaginative manners (i.e. dangling on handrails, in background of tourist's photos, pressed up against window of moving car, etc.).
Hannibal - Drinking 151 all night and waking up to you riding an elephant that you took home the night before.
Harlem Globetrotter - Spinning as many basketballs on her body as you can while u are giving it to her doggystyle.
Head Of The Class - When you and your friends compete in school to see who can get aroused the most times fantasizing about the cute young teacher.
The Helen Keller - The man is fucking the woman, before he finishes he punches her in the ears so she goes deaf and get knocked out, then he pulls out and cums into her eyes so she blind.
Hershey Highway - Another colorful euphamism for anal sex.
High Dive - The skill of pulling your Johnson all the way out of your partner's hole and in one motion jamming it home again. Best suited for use in the corn hole, but can be very dangerous.
High-Fiving - When two men are enjoying the same partner from opposite ends
The Hindenburg - When some slut who is so bad at oral sex, you're forced to cry "Oh! The humanity!" as her teeth scrape your man tool.
Hoagie Slap - The act of slapping your semi-hard rod against a girls face multiple times.
Hogging - While intoxicated, high, or just plain desperate, you go searching for the fattest bitch you can find and proceed to ride her like a Harley. Best accomplished with large groups friends.
Hole In One - The act of sticking your dick in your own ass. Just try not to get a huge boner once it's in, or you'll get a nice snapparoo.
The Homolick Manuever - Using your penis to dislodge an object blocking a choking victim's windpipe.
Hot Carl - 1) (aka "The Fudgecicle") - when you withdraw your shaft from the bowels of her anus and place it directly into her mouth for a cleaning. (used mostly in gay sex, so we hear) 2) - The act of taking a dump directly into the mouth of your partner
Hot Karl Candy Cane - A variation of the above in which the man who is receiving the oral cock cleaning gives the woman a reach around.
Hotdog In A Hallway - When laying the pipe, you realize your dick isn't even touching the walls of her vagina, kind of like tossing a hotdog in a hallway. Most frequently happens when banging the neighborhood trick or if you're slinging a small dick.
Hot Lunch - The result of defecating a tube of shit directly into a girl's mouth.
Hot Lunch, Vegeterian - (see Hot Plate) A variation upon the aforementioned meal in which the diner stretches a piece of saran wrap over her mouth such that chewing (for texture) is possible, but no actual contact with animal product occurs.
Hot Plate – (See Vegetarian Hot Lunch)The act of placing plastic wrap over a girl's face and then shitting on it.
Hot Pocket - When you get a boner in public and cant control the urges anymore, thus making a hot pocket.
Houdini - When you¹re doing a girl doggy style, then you fake an orgasm (spit on her back). When she turns around, blow your load in her face and say, "Abracadabra bitch!" also known as the David Copperfield and the David Blaine.
Hummer - When a male receives oral sex and the giver "hums" during the act.
Hummer Bird - When a girl is giving a guy a hummer, and he's enjoying it, she bites on his bird.
The Hunter Gatherer - You and your partner defecate while 69ing. Pretty much self-explanatory.
Hunting For The HIV- The act of banging at least 10 random whores in a single week without wearing a rubber. Also gets compounded if you end up shooting up smack with one of the skanks.
Ice Cream in the Grass - When after sex with a girl just before or after her period week. When her juices are thicker than usual, and you pull out and see the sticky creamy goo in your pubes.
Ice T-bag - The act of dropping your testicles onto your partners face and/or mouth while holding an ice cube against your nuts and letting it drip on their face.
The Indian Cock Burn - While a chick sucks you off, she twists her hand around your shaft as if she was trying to give you an Indian burn.
Inhibation - The state of being too inhibited to masturbate in front of your lover.
Inspecting the Platoon - When a girl gets on her knees to perform a blow job the guy snaps to attention and blows his load in her face.
Instagasm - Pre-mature ejaculation at the sight of a beautiful woman.
ie: "She was so fine, I had an insta-gasm before I could get her clothes off!"
Intoxicourse - Having sexual intercourse whilst piss-drunk.
Jawbreaker - A blowjob involving three penises at one time. Two Penises is known as Crossed Swords.
The Jedi Mind Trick - When banging your partner, you repeatedly shout "I'm NOT fucking you, I'm NOT fucking you".
Jelly Donut (aka "Bizmark", "Clownface", "Strawberry Shortcake", "Strawberry Milkshake") - when a guy blows his load on a girls face, Then swiftly punches her in the nose, causing it to bleed. Giving the appearance of a strawberry shortcake.
The JFK 1) (aka "The Magic Bullet") - Slip a blindfold on a chick while she is giving you oral. At the same time, have a friend come behind her and pleasure himself behind her. Let em rip at the same time and nail the broad with goo from both sides of her head. She will always question if there was a second shooter or just a magic load 2) Don't have sex or masturbate for a couple of weeks, saving a big load up. Then have a woman go down on you and blow that massive load in her mouth, blowing the back of her head off.
Jim Henson - Sticking all 5 fingers in a girls' box and picking her up like a muppet...Hence the Jim Henson.
J.O.D. - ("Joad") - Jerking Off while Driving. Try it while going through the Drive-Thru of your choice...
Journey into Darkness - This is the most disturbing (and difficult?) of all. It entails shitting into another person's asshole. Not for beginners.
The Juanita Special Bean Dip - While your tramp rides you like a mechanical bull, insert your thumb into her poop chute (be sure to get your thumb nice and gooey), then stick your brown thumb into her mouth, and slip it under her tongue so she can get the full robust taste of the Juanita "special" bean dip.
Kaboose - When a group of guys a slam a girl in the same night, the Kaboose is the last person to go. Similar to sloppy seconds, but entails more than 2 people.
Kamala - Banging a fat black woman while eating a rotisserie chicken off the fat folds behind her neck.
Karen Carpenter - Fucking a chick in the ass while she vomits. Feels a lot like a multi-donkey punch.
Kennebunkport Chowder - Eat a girl out and vomit the contents of the New England clam chowder you ate for lunch between her legs.
Kennebunkport Surprise - The act of covertly filling your cheeks with chunky-style New England clam chowder, and screaming in disgust as you hurl it between your partners legs while eating her out.
Kenny Roger's Roasters - While doing the bitch in front of the fire, stick it in the pooper and twirl her around on your dick-thus creating the roaster effect. Do until a golden crispy brown.
Kentucky Plow - You're doing a girl doggy style on a hard floor, then you sweep her arms our from under her so that she bangs her face on the floor, knocking out her teeth. -
Kick-Fucking - The act of receiving sexual pleasure from repeatedly getting kicked in the ass.
Kids Drink - After 4 or 5 people get done fucking a girl everyone bust in a cup and let her drink it.
Kiss Of Death - Get a girl whose been cheating on you (but thinks she is getting away with it) to go down on you after having secretly coated your dick with cyanide.
The Landshark - The woman braces herself facing a wall, naked, hands against the wall, legs spread, bent over so that her ass is lusciously jutting out. (hint: She might want to wear a biking helmet and some rollerblading wrist guards to avoid serious injury.) Next, the guy also naked as well as stiff cocked, walks to the opposite end of the room, places his palms together and raises them above his head, (thus imitating the dorsal fin of a shark) and begins chanting the theme to Jaws. When given some predetermined signal, the guy sprints toward the girl at full speed with his pelvis-out, fin protruding, and rams her dead square in the ass.
Lay-Away - Instead of giving up on that young little hottie that you know you're too old for, but just
can't resist, you begin to "work her over (ya know, play the nice guy, father figure type...)" in hopes that you can scoop her up when she's legal. This approach is much like the lay- away system, you get the merchandise when the time is right.
Leave In Conditioner - In a public place, you strategically leave drops of semen in a woman's hairdo following fellatio. A good lesson for those who refuse to swallow the evidence.
Leonardo Dicaprio - You are getting head from a girl. She is sitting in a chair, you are standing. Just when you are about to cum, lean forward putting all your wait against her mouth. Stretch out your arms and yell "I'm the king of the world"
Let's Play Dracula - Trick a girl into Halloween shenanigans by making her, " Vant to suck your Cock" till it bleeds.
Little Man in the Canoe (see also "Budgie's Tongue") - Euphemism for the clitoris. The Clitoris is the little man and the pussy is the canoe. aka "The Little Man in the Boat"
Lloyd Bridges - When she's giving the head job and you're just about to blow, twitch and yell "Who is it?" She will look around. Blow in her ear. She will look confused, and will jerk her head repeatedly to one side, just like Lloyd Bridges did to get the seawater out of his ear in Sea Hunt. (For those too young to remember, he was a crime-busting scuba diver).
Log Ride - (usually done with 2 males) Both partners spread their cheeks and press both stinkers together. Then one of the partners defecates while the other receives. If both partners defecate, its known as "log wars".
Long John Silver - Don't jerk off or fuck for a week Call your girl over and tell her you miss her and that she should get to "singing into the mic" right away. When your about to cum, yank your hose and put out the fire in either eye. This should help her to resemble the famed pirate.
The Lorena Bobbit - Obviously, this one is for the ladies. When engaging in some hard core booty sex, squeeze your butt cheeks together as tight as you can, and start violently jumping and thrashing your ass around, in an effort to rip his dick off. (To reach true Lorena status, you must take the severed dick for a drive and then toss it out the window.)
Lost Goat (aka "The Snake Skin") - The act of staying inside her after sex until you go limp, then pulling out leaving behind your condom and its contents.
Louisiana Licker - Originally a flavor of chicken wing at a famous chain of western Pennsylvania restaurants - also the name of a position when you find yourself lying on your back nostril deep in the cooch of a nasty beeotch with swamp ass (a.k.a. baboon ass, crisco ass, etc.).
Louisville Slugger - Your girl is on her knees in front of you servicing your pole. At some random point in time during this act you pull out, twist your hips, yell "BATTER UP!!!!" and smack her firmly in the cheek with your baseball bat like cock.
Lucky Pierre - The middle man in a three way butt fuck.
Lucky Pierre's Magic Whistle - The middle man in a three way butt fuck who's also blowing another guys brains out.
Magic Bullet (aka "The JFK") - Slip a blindfold on a chick while she is giving you oral. At the same time, have a friend come behind her and pleasure himself behind her. Let em rip at the same time and nail the broad with goo from both sides of her head. She will always question if there was a second shooter or just a magic load.
Magiver - When you are sleeping with a girl and then you wake up pop a rod and slap her in the throat then she spits up your cum.
Mangina - When a man places his penis and testicles between his thighs so as to give the impression of having a vagina rather than male genitalia.
Mangry - Describing the anger of women who are angry at men, specifically. "She's such a bitch, she's just plain mangry."
Marksmenship Training - Perform a psuedo "Dirty Sanchez" on her butt, but instead of a mustache, draw a bullseye around your woman's ass and fire away.
Martin Van Buren Panties - When a woman doesn't shave or wax her bikini area, the hair creeping out from under her panties and growing on her inner thighs resembles the muttonchops worn by the Eighth President of the United States.
Manure Transfer - The act when the woman's back and the bed are perpendicular but she is upside down (see SAMOAN PILE DRIVER), back-to-back with the right-side-up standing man. Through careful anal-orifice matching techniques, the man craps directly into the woman's upside-down pooper.
Martyr (see also Crucifixion, Crucifixion with a stake in it) - The Martyr is the receiver of the dicks in a "Crucifixion"
The McDonald's Quick Draw - Get your girlfriend to talk dirty into the intercom, making the order guy start to beat off. Then while pulling up to the window, have her give you felatio till you are about to blow your beefy chunk-load. Upon pulling up to the window, tell your girl friend to yell "Draw!". Then on "three", both you and the guy blow your loads either on her or each other.
Meating - A synonym for gay butt sex. So you could ask someone if you were still on for you meating later. It can also be used as a verb. You could say "Lance gave me a severe meating."
Meatlocker - You are getting brains in a Meat Locker. You cream in her eye and it freezes shut.
The Mellon Dive - Headbutting a woman's big fat titties. Always lots of fun.
Membrane Game - Jamming your thumb up a girl's pussy and your index finger up her asshole, and then rubbing the membrane between the two.
The Menthol - The act of getting head from a woman who just moments earlier ate a numerous amounts of cough drops, thus insuring a pleasurable, tingly feeling on your cock.
The Mexican Avalanche - This is when you cum in their hair and throw them down a flight of stairs.
Middle Relief - Some unknowing fans wonder how a professional pitcher can go through a season with one or two wins, one or two losses, and one or two saves. Those of us who know our pasttime realize that he is most likely in the shittiest part of the rotation known as "middle relief." While the middle reliever comes in to provide sustenance after one pitcher is tired and before another comes in to secure a save, the middle relief maneuver is also used in "down time." If you have been pummel-fucking a girl for a while and begin to go a bit limp, use the nearest cylindrical object (fingers, dildo, bedpost, lead pipe) and ram it home while you take a bit of a breather. This will allow the starting pitcher the necessary time to rest and provide him with sufficient time to warm up to full strength once again. He then can come on as closer to secure the deal. Forget about that curve ball, Ricky...give her the meat!
M.I.L.F - The abbreviation for "Mom I'd Like to Fuck". This old school reference is used when one of your friends/girlfriends has a hottie for a Mom.
Milking the Cow - Have sex with a girl with a rubber on, then afterwards pull the rubber off ever so carefully so that all of your specimens are in the bottom then after sex, while she is in a post orgasm eyes- shut bliss, while laying down hold it upside down over her face and use the condom while pretend your milking cow utters.
Milky Fire Hydrant - When you jizz in your girls pussy and then proceed to press down very hard on her stomach and just above her pussy and then it will shoot out very fast all over your self like a fire hydrant.
The Milky Weigh - Preceding sexual or oral intercourse, both the male and female is weighed on a scale. Immediately following the weighing session, intercourse is commenced. After ejaculation, each individual is then weighed once again to observe how much weight is lost in the male, and gained in the female due to the exchange of semen.
Minjeeta - A Paki Lesbian.
Missionary - Sexual position characterized by the female on the bottom and the male on the top, default sex position.
The Missouri Compromise - When a girl will only let guys fuck her in the ass because she is still a "virgin".
Monet - A girl is considered a Monet when, just like the great works of the impressionist painter himself, she is good from far but far from good.
Monkey Wrench - When some sadistic bitch takes your dick back between your legs and sucks you off.
Monroe Transfer - The act when the woman's back and the bed are perpendicular but she is upside down (see 'Samoan Pile Driver'), back-to-back with the right-side-up standing man. Through careful anal- orifice matching techniques, the man craps directly into the woman's upside-down pooper.
The Moose - The sign given to a kickee when in doggie style. It is performed by placing both hands over your head with palms facing out and waving your fingers wildly.
Moose Knuckle (see also "Ninja Foot", "Camel Toe", "The Mumbler") - A girl in pants so tight, you can make out the outline of her lips.
The Moped - A chick that's a fun ride until your friends see you on it, if you know what I mean.
The Mork - Made famous by Robin Williams on Mork & Mindy, stick your pinky and ring fingers up a girls ass, then jam your middle and index fingers up her cunt. (Please note: Not complete until you finish it off with a Nanoo-Nanoo!)
Morning Glory - This occurs the morning after a really good one-night-stand. You wake up sporting morning wood, and instead of getting up and going to the bathroom, you ram into your partner's ass and relieve yourself inside her. Experts can take it a step further and attempt this on their (soon to be ex-) girlfriends.
Moses - A man who enjoys going down on a woman during her period. Derived from the Biblical figure Moses, who parted the Red Sea.
The Motorboat - While performing oral sex on a girl, flap your lips together on her clit, thus imitating the sound of a motorboat. She'll love you forever.
The Motorcycle - While receiving a blowjob, you fart as loud as you can, at the same time twisting the cocksuckers ears like the throttle of a motorcycle.
Mudslide - Titty fucking a girl while sitting on top of her, then getting up to find skid marks on her stomach.
Muff Teaser - Finger, suck, eat, etc. a girl until she is begging for it. Then rub your stiffy round her golden valley until she screams at you to give her a banging. Right when her frustration is at its highest level, stop and finish with a DIY(do it yourself) hand job. Then leave the room without saying a word. Not to be tried if you want to shack up with the selfish bitch again.
Muff Trumpet (see also "Cunt Trumpet") - When your eating a girl out you blow into really hard in her pussy than press her stomach down and it will make the soothing sound of a trumpet.
Muhamad Ali - (for a girl) While giving your soon to be ex-boyfriend a hummer, start punching his nutsack as if it were a punching bag.
The Mumbler (see also "Moose Knuckle", "Ninja Foot", "Camel Toe") - A girl in pants that are too tight (you can see the lips moving but you can't make out what they're saying).
The Mung - Obtain a female that has been dead for 2-3 days (the time period since death is important). Then place your mouth just outside her vaginal opening. Have a friend jump on her stomach, and try to catch as much stuff that comes out as you can in your mouth.
The Mushroom Welt (aka "Mushroom Tattoo") - when a chick's going down on you, you pull it out, pull it back and whip her in the forehead with it....thus....mushroom tattoo.
The Mushroom Tattoo (aka "Mushroom Welt") - when a chick's going down on you, you pull it out, pull it back and whip her in the forehead with it....thus....mushroom tattoo
Mushy Biscuit - This is actually a very fun game. Just choose a piece of food that you and your male friends like to eat. Then you and your buddies form a tight circle around the food item and proceed to jerk off all over it. Last one to bust a nut gets the prize of eating the food.
The Napoleon Bonar-Part - Strap a bayonet on your cock while fucking a French midget.
Neopolitan - The first shit after a good ass-ramming. Brown, white and red.
New Jersey Meat Hook - 1) When a man is having sex with a woman from behind, he then places a thumb in her anus to pull her up and down his penis. 2) Inserting 2 or more fingers into your lady's poontang and your thumb in her poop chute and leading her around the room like a little doggie...
The New York Bird Feeder (see also "The Russian Bird Feeder") - Eating a girls pussy while she's shitting.
New York Style Taco - Get really drunk. Then go down on her and puke while eating her out.
The 9:15 Wake Up Call - While a girl is sleeping, two guys stand above her on opposite sides, masturbating on her face. Her face will look like a clock with one hand on the 9 the other on the three. Wake that filthy slob up with 2 steaming loads of goos across her grill, yelling " its 9:15 you dirty animal!!!"
Ninja Foot (see also "Camel Toe", "Moose Knuckle", "The Mumbler") - A girl in pants so tight, you can make out the outline of her lips.
The Nixon - A variation of the Bullwinkle in which you give two peace signs as your signal of dominance. May enhance the act by shaking jowls and yelling, "I'm not a crook". This is considered very bold and is frowned upon for those with a modicum of decorum.
Nut Butter - The sweat and stink of the juices between your nuts and legs after a physical work out/sex.
Obtaining the Brown License - When the guy gives the out-hole a shagging for the first time in his life, he's acquired his brown license.
Oil Drill (for the ladies?) - you are jammin her in the ass, she happens to have diarrhea all over your Johnson
Old Jism Trail - The stream of semen oozing down the chin and chest of someone who has just finished fellating a senior citizen.
Old Faithful - 1) (usually done with 2 males) when one partner blows air, in a CPR manner, into the other partners anus. Then, while in the baby wipe position, the blowing partner urinates on the others stinker while he farts all the air out. 2) (aka "Goo Geyser") Shoot your load in a girls belly button, once it is full press on her stomach making the load shoot out like a fountain... hence old faithful.
On The Rocks - A great party favorite accomplished by dunking your nutsack in someone's drink after they left the room. When the person returns, enjoy the sight of them drinking your scrotal rinse. Enjoy extra laughs if you leave a nice pube in there sticking up like a tacky drink umbrella.
The One Eyed Redskin - After banging a girl on her period, wipe the blood on her face, come in her eye, and stick a feather in her ear. Then dance around the room, naked with a towel over ur junk, yelling, "woo woo woo woo!!".
Ookie Kookie (see also "The Wet Biscuit") - A method of circle jerk in which there is a cookie in the middle of the circle and the last person to shoot their load has too eat the cookie.
Ordering a Code Red - At Climax the guy yells out, "YOU CAN"T HANDLE THE TRUTH!", and crams his cock in the pink (or red) as hard as he can.
Oreo (see also "Zebra") - Threeway sex with two black individuals banging a white person.
Oscars Treat - This ones for the outdoor enthusiasts: Make sure your next "first time" date is on the night before trash day. As you greet the "ho" at her front door you tell her that because of your OCD you have a ritual you must perform before you begin the date. Being the gentleman that you appear to be she obliges. Before the tuna machine knows what hit her, grab the rope from the front seat of your truck and hog tie her to the curbside mailbox. Quickly strip her rotten, and with the respect of a sailor on leave... fill every orifice with the nearby garbage. After giving her a few rabbit punches, spank one out in the mailbox and go home.
Oven Stuffer Roaster - The unusual method of inserting your finger in the ass of your partner while screwing her, and feeling her cervix. This procedure is more effective from behind (see NEW JERSEY MEATHOOK).
Oyster - A derivation of the tea bag which is accomplished by numbing one's testicles with ice and then inserting them in a chicks mouth and letting the tramp munch on them.
Pajaowa! - The sound that is made when a guy cock-slaps his girl in the face.
Pasadena Mudslide - This happens when you leave a windy shit between the breasts of a woman while you straddle her neck for a blowjob. (A close cousin to the Cleveland Steamer.)
Pattycake - While you're nailing some girl doggie style and your friend is catching some head off the same girl, you get a quick game of pattycake going. This makes you reminisce of your childhood memories and eases the sight of watching your friend blow his load.
Paying Off The Umpire - When you go to a hooker because you cant get to 3rd base on your own.
Paying The Rent - A sexual position in which the woman is folded in half, knees above shoulders, with the man holding the back of her calves and banging ferociously.
Peanut butter & Jelly Sandwich - You shit on a girls pussy when she is on her period and eat her out. Way sick!
Peanut Butter Poodle - When going down on a chick in the dark, rub peanut butter on her sweet snatch. Then have your or her dog lick the rest of it off, without her knowing.
Pearl Harbor (for the ladies) - Right after sucking a guy off stand up and spit his jizz right back in his face, then yell "Tora, Tora, Tora!"
Pearl Necklace - When she is giving oral sex, you pull back and shoot it on her neck-- thus a pearl necklace .
Pegging - Having a female take you in the rear with a strap on.
Pencil Sharpener - When a girl uses her teeth during felatio
Penguin Blow - This happens when a hooker offers to blow you for five dollars. Of course you accept the offer and remove your pants. She gets on her knees, gives you two licks, reaches and grabs your wallet from your hanging pants and then runs off. You are left chasing after her with your pants around your ankles, thus imitating a waddling penguin.
Penis Watch - When you wrap your limp mantool all the way around your wrist. Great party trick.
Perfect Ten - The maximum number of men a woman can pleasure at one time. So called because of the math involved: one each in the mouth, anus, and vagina, one in each hand, one in the crook of each elbow, one in the bend of each knee and one between the feet.
PEUM (see also "Double Dragon", "Split Pissonality") - An acronym that defines the annoying (and uncontrollable) tendency to piss in multiple directions after a raucous fuck: Post-Ejaculatory Urinary Misfire.
The Pig Roast - While you're plugging some girl's hole doggie style, (up the dirt road or the funhole, pick your poison) she's blowing your best friend's cock at the same time, hence simulating a pig on a spit. Very Similar to Chinese Finger Cuffs.
Pillow Fluff - First, you press your butt tightly on a pillow and fart. After holding the fart in the pillow
with your ass cheeks for two seconds, quickly turn around and stuff your nose directly into the fart epicenter. Inhale deeply, and reap the rewards of euphoria and disorientation.
Piniata - After hooking up with a girl, while your both just laying there grab your boxers and put them over her head and take your penis and smack it over her head repeatedly.
Pink Glove - This often occurs when a girl isn't wet enough during sex. When you attempt to remove your member from her box, the inside of her twat sticks to your hog, hence the Pink Glove.
Pink Starfish - (see also "Chocolate Starfish") Another name for the asshole.
Pirate Maker - When your sitting on a girls face and she's sucking on your nuts, you start poking her in the eye with your cock.
The Pirate's Treasure - While fucking your girl in the ass, you strike a hefty load of shit. After you've found this buried treasure deep in her booty, you scream, "Argh!", like a pirate.
Pittsburgh Platter (see also Glass Boat, Plating) - When a girl lies underneath a glass coffee table and a guy takes a shit on top of the table.
Plating - (see also Glass Boat, Pittsburgh Platter) Take a clear, glass plate and place it on your partners face, then shit on it. It gives them a nice view without all the messy cleanup. How come you don't see that on any Dawn commercials.
Play-Doh Fuzzy Pumper - A Rusty Trombone, during which the recipient shits into the Trombone player's mouth, simulating the hand crank action of the Play-Doh Fuzzy Pumper toy.
P.O.D. (Post Orgasmic Depression) - The overwhelming regret felt immediately after you blow your load with a chick you really didn't want to fuck in the first place.
Polar Bear (aka "Snowjob", "Chilly Willy") - Blowjob involving ice cubes.
The Police Chief's Daughter - Get an anal virgin and fuck her up the ass in a public place i.e. The Mall, or a Base Ball Stadium. She'll most likely scream really loud causing you to get caught and arrested... just like if you just fucked the police chief's daughter
Poop Troop - The act of having anal sex.
The Popcorn Trick - First, take your girlfriend to the cinemas, for a nice romantic date. Buy a tub of popcorn, wait until the lights dim, and carefully make a hole in the bottom on the tub. Then, inconspicuously insert your penis through the bottom of the tub into the popcorn and casually offer some to your bitch. When she digs in, she will find nice surprise. Who doesn't love buttered popcorn?
Poppin' the Ass Cherry - (we thought this was a little too literal but oh well...) Having anal sex for the first time.
Porcelain Kiss - When you are taking a shit in a public washroom and your unit accidentally touches the rim of the bowl. Hmmm, STD, bacteria, both? Who knows?
Porcupine - Screwing a girl that has not shaved her legs in about three weeks.
Potato Chip (California Potato Chip) - Fuck the hell out of yo bitch, then bust a nut all over her back. Call it a night and then proceed to go to sleep. When you wake in the morning, Peel the hardened Jizz of her back and serve it to her for breakfast.
Power Situp - When you talk your boy into helping with fuckin' with somebody you hate. Get said asshole to get in the situp position. Place a towel over his eyes and tell him there is no way he can do a "power sit up". Hold the towel down while he vainly struggles to do a sit-up. At the last instant whip the towel off so he mashes his grill square into your buddies cornhole .......who should be pre-positioned in a crouch right over the stupid fucks face. Preferably right after he takes a horrendous grundy.
Prego BJ - Getting a blowjob from a yet unborn fetus whilst having sex on a pregnant chick.
Puerto Rican Fog Bank - While 69ing with your partner, release a cloud of sphincter fog directly into her nostrils.
The Pull Start - Put as many anal beads as possible into your partners tail end. Then when they least suspect it, pull them out like your starting a lawnmower.
Pulling The Goalie - When the guy takes out the female's tampon, puts it in her ass, fucks her pussy, and then puts the tampon back in after he "scores".
Pumpkin - The art of eating a girl out while she's on the shitter.
Punk Fake (aka "The Houdini") - During Doggy style sex, right before you come, pull out and spit on her back, she then "sighs: and turns around. Then you take the opportunity to blow your wad on her face!
Purple Mushroom - This occurs when a woman is giving you oral sex and you withdraw your penis in order to poke it back into her cheek. It should leave a lasting impression similar to a purple mushroom.
Queef - A well known, but sometimes embarrassing occurrence. Queefing happens when air gets trapped in a girls vagina, and makes a soft hissing, or farting kind of a sound while that air is released.
Quickie - The act of having sex in a hurry or on a time frame. ie. "I have to get back to work, this has got to be a quickie."
The Rake - It is when a woman uses her teeth to "rake" or scrape the shaft of a man's penis while performing fellatio on him.
Ralph Malph - puke all up in her snatch while munching her box.
The Ram - Doing the deed close to a wall (Doggie style for best effect) you ram her head into the wall for deeper penetration.
Rat Belly - Sticking your ball bag out your pants while keeping your cock inside. Your balls look like the bottom of a rat's belly. Do it when no one is expecting it. Great at parties.
Rat Tail - When a fag wakes up in the morning and a used condom is hanging out of his ass, thus creating a tail.
Ray Bans (see also "Arabian Goggles") - Put your nuts over her eye sockets while getting head. You're can is on her forehead. Yes, it may be anatomically impossible, but it is definitely worth a try.
The Ray Finkle (aka "The Scott Norwood") - While aiming to shoot a load between her eyes, you miss her totally and go wide right. Named for the Field Goal kicker who missed wide right.
Rear Admiral - When getting a chick from behind (with both partners standing), make sure you don't let her grab onto anything when she is bent over. Then, drive your hips into her backside so that the momentum pushes her forward. The goal is to push her into a wall or table, or have her trip and fall on her face. You attain the status of Admiral when you can push her around the room without crashing into anything and not using your hands to grab onto her hips.
Red Badge of Courage (see also "Red Wings") - When you go down on a girl while she is on her period, after this act has taking place you are said to have received your "Red Badge of Courage".
Red Wings (see also "Red Badge of Courage") - When you go down on a girl while she is on her period, after this act has taking place you are said to have received your "red wings".
Relative Humidity - The amount of sweat that rolls off your ass while you're fucking your cousin.
Reltny - In a man's restroom, the urinals often contain salt or deoderant tablets. A reltny is someone who sucks on them.
Remember 9/11 - When you straddle a girl stomach and titty fuck her but your holding both her boobs up by her nipples and blow your load all over her towers.
Resleaveing - A girl that has been used too many times is all loose with extra large beef curtains, you take a five pound ham, shove it up into the pussy and just pull out the bone.
Reverse Snowball - Eating a girls pussy after some other stiff just got done cumming inside her. Of course your dumb ass didn't know about it in the first place, but you kind of deserve it for eating that stinky jizzy pussy anyway.
Resuscitation - When a girl is asleep, carefully open her mouth so that she doesn't awake. Then, squat over her face and carefully place your shit hole on her lips. When the time is right, you let rip the biggest baddest fart ever known to man and see if it wakes her up. Great fun during those long sleepless nights.
Riding the Bull - A Texas favorite. Seduce the fattest girl at the party. Station 6-8 of your friends in the closet of an upstairs bedroom. When you get her up there and are going at it doggystyle you give the signal and everyone jumps out, turns on the lights and yells' "yee haaw ride the bull".
Riding the Hershey Highway (aka Taking the Old Dirt Road) - Partaking in anal sex.
Rim – 1) n. the outer, often curved or circular edge of something. 2) n. the outer often wrinkled and dark brown edge of the shit shoot. 3) v. (ing) the art of exploring this prune-like orifice with your tongue.
Ringing The Doorbell - Female Masturbation.
Road Head - The act of getting head while driving, one of my personal favorites
Road to Athens - Another colorful euphemism for anal sex
Rocky Balboa (see also "Rocky Balboa Title Punch") - Don't shower for 2 weeks, then diarrhea down her throat at any point during sexual contact.
The Roddy Piper - When getting your girl from behind, you toss the sleeper hold on her and knock her out ala Rowdy Roddy Piper. While nailing your unconscious victim, you get to simulate your life long dream of necrophilia. Now you never have to break into the morgue again.
Rodeo Sex (see also "Baby Rodeo" and "Butt Rodeo") - When you are doing your girl doggystyle, bend over and whisper in her ear, "your almost as good a lay as your sister..." Then try to hold on for 8 seconds.
Roman Helmet (aka "Roman Soldier") - Variation of Arabian Goggles, where a testicle is placed on each of the partners eyes and the penis along their nose.
Roman Shower - The act of vomiting on your partner during missionary or cowgirl sex.
Roman Soldier (aka "Roman Helmet") - You stand behind your kneeling girl, place your balls over her eyes, and let your shaft hang down over her nose... gives the appearance of the helmets Roman Soldiers wore.
The Romanian - Everyone knows that Romanians love to give head. But to do this right, you have to get head in a public place with a Romanian, then when someone spots you, spooge in her face and yell out "I'm a communist!"
The Roscoe - The act of using one's genitals as a bludgeoning device to upside the ho's head with your beefy billy club.
The Rose Creeper - Seductively brush a beautiful long stem red rose against your sweetheart's neck, breasts, and inner thigh. Slowly rub the rose along her smooth skin as you tenderly kiss her entire body. After working her into the mood for some deep love making, unzip your fly and pull out your raging boner. Begin to punish-fuck her dumper while whipping her with the rose and screaming nasty obscenities at her. I bet she never saw that coming.
Rotisserie - Getting done by 2 guys at once, one on each end: oral on one side, anal or doggy style on the other.
Rude Beneby - Get a girl/guy naked during foreplay, them make fun of them. It is rare that sex follows...
Russian Alarm Clock - The art of laying a log on your girl friends face while she's sleeping, she wakes up screaming, viola, the Russian alarm clock.
Russian Bird Feeder (see also the "New York Bird Feeder") - Eating a girls period muff whiles she’s shitting.
Russian Blow Job - Occurs in threesomes involving one guy and two girls. The girls take turns giving blowjobs to the man for a decided intervals until he cums, and we have a loser (or winner...however you see it).
Rusty Nail - This is good if your with a girl that does not like to swallow....When receiving a blowjob from a chick... just when your about a to cum make her step on a rusty nail giving her lockjaw...Her mouth will be stuck open allowing you to shoot your jizz in her mouth. -
Rusty Trombone (see also "The Boofter") - 1) Demanding oral pleasure immediately following anal hijinks with a woman. 2) the girl eats your asshole out and jacks you off at the same time.... similar to the slide action of a trombone... and the mouthpiece is all "rusty"
Sacking The Cook - A code phrase between guys to let your friends know you've just received a blow job. For example, "You know Vanessa? She just sacked my cook."
Sally Dog - The act of cock-slapping a bitch in the face.
Saluting The Colonel - After ramming your partners ass, you notice a corn kernel on the head of your cock.
Samoan Pile Driver - A sexual Position that occurs when the woman's back and the bed are perpendicular but she is upside down. The practitioner of the Pile Driver stands above the woman and points his shit due south, simply bending his knees for repeated bludgeoning. This process is repeated while screaming, Adaay.... goony, goony, goony... ABDAY...ABDAY....ABDAY..HA!" Repeat and rinse.
Sandbag - Under an assumed name in a tropical region, you meet a young hottie and engage in the well known cliche of sex on the beach. Just before insertion, remove the rubber (without getting caught of course), and proceed to bang away until you blow your load, without pulling out. As you dismount and prepare for departure, grab a handful of sand, throw it in her eyes, and run away laughing hysterically while leaving her blinded, butt-necked, and knocked up. Especially lots of fun when accomplished during the spring break season.
Sand Paper Treatment - When your girlfriend is sleeping run your forearm across her dry beaver as hard and rough as you can, shell wake up screaming like she just been scrapped with sand paper. Works great after a goodbye fuck on a chick you just caught cheating on you.
The San Fran Tickler - Straddling a girls head and titty fucking her while she tickles your asshole with her tongue.
The Santa Cruz - A timeless classic. Take a surfer girl, cover her in Mr. Zoggs sex wax, then proceed to beat her senseless with a surfboard. Once she's passed out, you jerk off on her face, stand with one foot on her, hold your hands in the air in the "hang ten" sign, and shout, "Yar, Dude!"
The Sardine - When you're eating out a 84 year old woman's pussy that hasn't been fucked in fifty years and her crusty old clit just breaks off and falls in your mouth. It will taste and look like a sardine.
Scabby D - The unfortunate occurrence for a male due to a practice of dry fucking in blue jeans sans undergarments. One of the most feared of all sexual accidents.
Scooter Pie - When one of your friends passes out drunk... you and your friends take turns rubbing your bare asses up and down his face.
The Scott Norwood (aka "The Ray Finkle") - While aiming to shoot a load between her eyes, you miss her totally and go wide right. Named for the Field Goal kicker who missed wide right.
Screaming Seagull (aka "The Veal Cutlet") - When a man is having sex with a girl on the beach, then pulls out, using the juices on his schlong to roll it around in the sand to collect it and then continue having sex.
The Screwnicorn - When a dyke puts her strap-on dildo on her forehead and proceeds to go at her partner like a crazed unicorn.
Seal the Envelope - When hooking up with a really drunk girl and she passes out before you cum, turn her over and blow your load all over her ass crack. When it dries, it will seal her butt cheeks together and she will have to pry them open the next day - hence, sealing the envelope
Search Party - When you and a partner are searching for a lost load that could be lost in her hair.
The Seatbelt - While one fag straddles his partners cock, he receives a blowjob from the fruitcake on the bottom.
Seeing Eye Dog - This one's tricky. When you get a blind girl to go down on you but instead she unknowingly sucks off her German Shepard.
The Self Shotty - The sexual derivation is when for several days after getting play, you jerk off to the memory of when you got some action. Derived from the weed smoking term of taking a blunt hit and then exhaling into a tube and then inhaling good ole THC again.
Seventy One - Basically, 69 with two fingers up the ass.
Seventy Two - A 69 with 3 fingers up her brown eye.
Shanghai Shampoo - Fuck a chick until you've built up a load large enough to paint a room. Blow it all in her hair, rub it in thoroughly. When it dries it will resemble the crunchy noodles often served with chop soy.
Shanghai Stirfry - when a girl gives you a blowjob, pukes all over your cock and keeps going.
Sharpshooter - Anyone that can shoot his magic cream with extreme accuracy. You gotta take his word for it, since you don't want him to demonstrate on your chin, unless of course you're into that sort of thing.
Shirley Temple - Pour a can of 7-Up on a girl's menstruating pussy and eat her out.
ShitSpit - The residue left dripping after a vigorous, saliva-assisted ass fingering.
Shitty Breakup - When you wanna dump your girlfriend in a mean way you fuck her in her ass and then make her give you a blowjob. Then after you cross the finish line you simply say, "Look, we gotta talk...".
The Shocker (aka "The Alien") (see also "The Spocker") - Two in the Pink and one in the Stink. Stimulate the clitoris with your thumb for extra voltage.
Shop Vac - When a dirty, talented tramp stuffs you're entire package (balls and all) into her mouth, and blows you with amazing suction power.
Short in the Cord - A "code" phrase used by the common man to refer to Testicular Tendon Tangle Syndrome. Ex. "Oh fuck! My nuts are killing me... I think I've got a short in the cord."
Shrimping - The term for licking or sucking your partner's toes.
Silent Alarm - You are banging a girl and you hear her husband pull up in the driveway.
Singapore Subway - When you stick a pvc pipe down a girls ass and run micro-machines down it.
Sixty-Nine - When two people perform oral sex on each other. Simulates the look of the numeral, "69".
Skull Fuck - During oral sex, reach down at your partner's face, and gouge out an eyeball. Proceed to take your dick and fuck the socket. After you splooge in the socket, go get a raisin and colored icing (the same color as the other eye), and make a replacement eyeball. Make her stay in that position until the splooge dries, and she has a semen-processed eyeball. ... please folks don't try this one at home.
Skiing - While facing in the same direction, a girl gets between two guys and jerks them both off, thus imitating some hardcore cross-country action.
Sleeping Bag - If you're going down on a really fat girl, you pull her enormous stomach roll of fat over your head.
Sleeping With The Fishes - A female version of the wet nap that is accomplished by rubbing her wet twat all over a guys pillow.
Slore – Both a Slut and a Whore, she will fuck you for money or attention
Slumpbuster - When a professional athlete finds the dirtiest, nastiest, fattest, most disease-ridden skank and puts the wood to her with the intent that it will break up a slump.
Smoking Pole - Oral sex on a male... no flame required
S'more - Threesome containing a black person, a white person, and a Hispanic person (or any other "graham cracker" colored individual.
Smuggling A Yo-Yo - Another term for camel toe/bear claw with the exception that you can actually see the outline of her lips through her pants.
The Snafu (aka "Coach Dale")- When a guy gets into the three point stance and a girl cups her hand around his balls and starts vigorously moving her hand from left to right. Then, after a thorough shake of the dice, she starts jamming her thumb up his ass while still juggling the nut sack.
Snake Skin (aka "The Lost Goat") - The act of staying inside her after sex until you go limp, then pulling out leaving behind your condom and its contents.
Sneak Attack - The act of coming up from the rear.
Sneaky Pete - While going at it full-force, pullout just enough to sneak back into the poopshoot without skipping a beat. most easily accomplished while having sex doggystyle. "Use caution: Without good aim, you could injure 'Pete'."
Sneezing Elephant - The act of blowing your load without your pole being completely erect. The name comes from the obvious similarity of the limp dick and an elephant's trunk, the cum thus representing snot.
Snerd Nurgling - The act of moving your anal lovers turds about within his/her lower intestine with your dick. Really popular with the lavender boys, hence the expression, "Oh Lance, Nergle me you Snerd"...
Snoodling - When an uncircumcised homo pulls his extra foreskin over the cock of another homo and proceeds to jerk him off. Those gays have way too much free time. Can be used at as a great derogatory term as in, "You Snoodler!"
Snot Rocket - When your girl is giving you head right before you bust shove your dick down her throat and watch it come out of her nose.
Snowball - After ejaculating in your partner's mouth, you make out and swap joy juice
Snowjob (aka "Polar Bear", "Chilly Willy") - Blowjob involving ice cubes.
Snowmobile - When getting a girl while she's on all fours, sweep out her arms so she falls on her face.
The Snuff - Lovingly fuck the shit out of your virgin or ragging girlfriend and wipe your bloody member across her face. Take a couple Polaroids, show them to your friends, and brag that you're a snuff film superstar.
Solpohbed - The act of agreeing to marry your girlfriend when she proposes to you; while she fucks you in the ass with a strap on!
Southern Trespass - Its when your fucking a girl and you switch holes without telling her.
The Sparkler - Get a double amputee with both legs clipped at the hip joints. Start fucking her either on a table top or standing and get her good and lubed .Now change position so that your on your back with her on top and give her two lighted sparklers. Spin her like the girl in the Chinese basket trick and enjoy. You have to keep her upright or risk breaking your crank and or setting the rug on fire. Safety glasses recommended.
Sperm Wail (see also "Spewphemism") - A verbal outburst during the Male Orgasm
Spewphemism (see also "Sperm Wail") - A verbal outburst during the Male Orgasm
Spicy Stanley - When a girl takes hot sauce and pours it on your cock. She then proceeds to give you a blowjob, making sure all of the hot sauce is gone.
Split Pissonality (see also "Double Dragon", "PEUM") - Post sex urination where you get a double stream out of one peehole.
The Spocker (see also "The Shocker") - Two in the pink and two in the stink
The Spoiler - The historic conquest of de-flowering some guys fiancée no more than one week before the wedding day.
Spring Cleaning - When, after a few days of no masturbation, you ejaculate in your sleep.
Squeegee - When your fucking a girl in the ass, when your about to cum, you stick a pin in one of her ass cheeks, thus making her clench up and cleaning all the shit off your cock as you pull out at the same time.
Stealin' me Lucky Charms - The act of swallowing cum.
The Stinger - When a girl is giving a guy head... mainly someone you don't like too much, sneak up behind the girl and pop a balloon right behind her head. She will freak out and hopefully if all goes to plan, bite down, thus creating a stinger.
Stingy Nut - When a chick isn't worth fucking; pull down her pants, bend her over, and jerk off all over her ass.
Stinky Coyote - When your going down on a chick and find a "basted wick" from who knows when.
Stirring Lunch - Another colorful euphemism for the act of anal sex (butt fucking for the masses...)
Stove Piping - Taking it in the Tush.
Stowaway - When you meet a tasty tourist, take her home and fuck her, unwittingly leaving her knocked-up. She soon leaves, unbeknownst to her that she's carrying a small castaway.
Straighten The Arrow - When you think one of your buddies is turning a little fruity, or you think he might be bi-curious or worse yet gay, just get all of your straight friends together and kick the living shit out of him. Fancy name for tough love.
Stranger - The act of sitting on your hand until it falls asleep, then you jerk off with it
Stranger On The Rocks - Numbing your hand by sticking it in a bucket of ice and then jerking off. Spanken not stirred.
Strangers In The Night - When you and your gay buddy each numb your hand (you should know how by now) and spank each other off. Thus eliciting the feeling of a hand job from someone else, from someone else.
Strawberry Milkshake (aka "Bizmark", "Clownface", "Jelly Donut", "Strawberry Shortcake") - when a guy blows his load on a girls face, Then swiftly punches her in the nose, causing it to bleed. Giving the appearance of a strawberry milkshake
Strawberry Shortcake (aka "Bizmark", "Clownface", "Jelly Donut", "Strawberry Milkshake") - when a guy blows his load on a girls face, Then swiftly punches her in the nose, causing it to bleed. Giving the appearance of a strawberry shortcake.
Stuffing The Cat - While fucking one of those loose-as-a-goose cunts, you stick random objects (fingers, dildos, tvs, etc.) to tighten it up so you can achieve orgasm.
Stuffucking - The act of "stuffing in" your limp, helpless member in hopes of getting it up. Potential causes: you're too drunk or she's too ugly.
Stumpin - (caution, this move requires imagination and balance). As you hover over a quadruple amputee, carefully insert what's left of her arms up your ass while using her knarled thighs to whack off. This should produce a stream of spunk which should land where a normal persons feet would be. You've now been stumpin.
Submarine Races - When you and a friend get together with two chicks and see who can get their girl off first by chowing down under.
Sud N' Fud - When trying to bang a girl, she gives that same old story, "I not that kind of girl.", "I don't fuck on the first date.", "I'm catholic.", "Stop asshole.", etc. etc... After hearing all this bullshit, you whip out your handy bar of soap. Then lather up her armpit (or any other joint you prefer), and proceed to fuck that instead.
Surfing - This happens when you nail a fat woman. As you watch the rippling effect of her rolls with every thrust, along with the feeling of being drenched, off balance, out of control, and in danger, you are given the sense of riding the ultimate wave.
Suicide Bomber (see also "Traveling Salesman") - Go home with a slore on what you know is a one night stand. Fuck her good a couple of times, go to sleep and when you wake up fuck her again. Soon, she will fall asleep again. When this happens take a shit in her bed and get up real quiet like so that she can't tell. Get the hell out. When she gets up and notices that you are gone she will think, "where did he go?? oh well he was a good lay." She will return home after a hard day at work and climb into her bed to find your friendly gift with her toes.
Suicide Mission - Fuck a chick wearing a condom, after you climax put the condom somewhere safe. Wait until she falls asleep wherein you blow the condom up like a balloon, you then scream suicide and as she sits up you pop the condom in her face, thus the suicide bomber. Useful on girls who don't go down.
Sunny Side Up - While having sex doggystyle, preferably on an empty stomach, pull out and ejaculate in curve of her back. Then, induce vomiting over your semen. For "scrambled eggs" , stir with penis.
The Swamp Thing - After a three hour aerobic workout, dip you balls in horse manure and dangle them above your wife's face while she is sleeping
Swimmer's Ear - When a girl is giving you a good sucking and right before you erupt, you remove yourself from her mouth, place your purple head in her ear, and fill her ear with some sweet love seed. Hopefully, you will give her an infection.
Swoosh - After you take a shit in the toilet and don't flush, you proceed to go at it doggystyle, then when you orgasm, put her head in the toilet and flush.
The Sword in the Stone - Before boffing a girl doggystyle, put crazy glue on your hammer. When its dry, scream out "Excalibur" and have all your friends run into the room and try to pull it out. Whoever does it first, gets to bang her next.
Syracuse Orangeman - Before you go down on a girl, eat an entire bag of Cheetoh's. After you chow down on that muff for a while it'll take on that orange color, and look like the furry mascot for the Syracuse Orangemen.
Tabletime - This is when you are bending someone over a table doggy style, and right as you are about
to cum in the heat of the moment you ask them "What time is it?" When they look back at you confused and say, "What?" You then slam their head into the table and say "It's Tabletime Beeeiotch!!!"
Tailgate Party - Jack off before you see the bitch you are going to fuck.
Taint - The spot between a woman’s cunt and her asshole. Called the taint because "taint her twat, taint her asshole". A.k.a the chinrest.
Taking the Old Dirt Road (aka "Riding the Hershey Highway") - Partaking in anal sex.
Talking into the Mic - While getting head from a girl, reach down and grab her hair and say, "Oh yeah baby, talk into that Mike". She resembles a person talking into a microphone. A strictly class move. She'll respect you for it afterwards.
Tangy Lemonade - Drinking the Yellow Enema
Teabag - The act of dropping your testicles onto your partners face and/or mouth
Tea and Cocoa - ( See “Cocoa and Tea”) After doing the “Dog in a Bathtub” – you plop your buttstained basted balls into your ho’s mouth
Team Player - Some skank that has been nice enough to fuck you and all of your friends.
Ted Williams (aka "Walt Disney") - Freeze your crank until it is frozen. Then do a chick with your frozen shaft. It will feel like she is having sex with Ted Williams.
Texas Tornado - When a guy crosses his first 2 fingers while finger-banging a chick.
Thanksgiving - Just like the holiday, Thanksgiving is when you do a girl and then she puts her two big butt cheeks on your face like holiday hams. An overcooked thanksgiving is similar to this but instead of just putting the cheeks on your head she farts on it too.
Three-Eyed Turtle - Basically plug every orifice of a girl in the following manner: thumb in ass, fingers in pussy, and dick in mouth.
The Three Finger No Look - When three guys are in a hot tub with one girl and each one takes turns fingering her without ever looking at her, so she doesn't know where its coming from.
Three-tard - When a group of retards go at it. Usually found in group homes for special people.
T-H-O (see also "Forever T-H-O") - Titty Hard On. You know like the guys hard-on, only with nipples. Happens mostly when a woman's titties are cold or when she is really horny. Guys get it too but no one really cares.
Throne of Lightning - This is done by fucking a girl while you shit in a toilet. When you're going to blow your load, turn her over and dunk her head in the toilet, while she's bobbing for your turd plummet a river of semen in her ass. Not to be confused with "Ride the Lightning," a Metallica album
Tickle Me Elmo - When the chin hairs of a skanky bitch tickle your nutsack during fellatio. Not about to start a Christmas craze any time soon.
Time Travel - Fucking around the clock.
Times Square Shuttle - fucking a girl with your friend and switching from mouth to vagina and vice versa.
Titanic - 1) noun. A girl who is likely to "go down" the first time out.
2) verb. After hours of passionate lovemaking in the pool, DROWN the bitch!
The Toboggan - You're screwing a chick from behind at the top of the stairs. As you climax, punch her in the back of the skull, knocking her out, grab her arms and ride her down the stairs like you're on a toboggan.
Toilet Paper Roll - When two guys are fucking a woman on her hands and knees, one in the yapper and one in the snapper or crapper, and the two guys clasp hands and get the gal bouncing between them like how a toilet paper roll can flutter.
Tombstone 69 - while having standing 69 with her upside down, wait till you cheeze then exclaim "tombstone" and drop her on her head WWF style. With any luck she will proceed to expel "angry dragon" style as well because of the impact. Important note: make sure your dick is not in her mouth anymore when you tombstone her
Tony Danza - You are banging away doggy style and at the penultimate moment you pull out and yell "Whose the boss?" Shove it in her ass, donkey punch her, blow your load and say, "Tony Danza!!!!!".
Topeka Destroyer - The act of vomiting directly onto your partner's head while receiving fellatio.
The Tortoise - When you eat out someone who doesn't have pubic hair yet - i.e. you got there before the hair (hare) did.
Tossing Salad - A person is forced to chow starfish with the help of whatever condiments are available, i.e. Jello, jism, etc, originally a Prison Term, but somehow has crossed over to mainstream as the act of licking ass.
Traveling Salesman (see also "Suicide Bomber") - Go home with a slore on what you know is a one night stand. Fuck her good a couple of times, go to sleep and when you wake up fuck her again. Soon, she will get in the shower. When this happens take a shit in her bed and make the bed up so that you can't tell. Get the hell out. When she gets out of the shower and notices that you are gone she will think, "where did he go?? oh well he made the bed, what a nice guy." She will return home after a hard day at work and climb into her bed to find your friendly gift with her toes.
Trifecta (aka "Triple Crown of Sex") - In the yapper, the snapper and the crapper all in the same session.
Triple Crown of Sex (aka "Trifecta") - In the yapper, the snapper and the crapper all in the same session.
Tropical Wind - When getting your asshole eaten out by a worthless tramp, you break wind.
True Love (aka "Yellow Enema") - When your sex partner allows you the ultimate pleasure of peeing in their butthole.
TSB - A code word for a guy who is suffering from desperation. We would say he had a severe case of TSB - Toxic Semen Buildup.
Tucked In - When your father or other male relative stops by your room at night to, "tuck himself in."
Tuna Melt - One of the sickest things we have ever received... You're down on a chick, lapping away, and you discover that it's her time of the month. By no means do you stop though. When the whale spews, tartar sauce with a hint of raspberry smothers your face.
Tupperware Party - When thee guys are triple-teaming a chick...one with his penis in her mouth, another in her vagina, and the third in her anus. So named because she is sealed 'airtight'.
Turd Hammer - Another name for the protruding item going into the anal cavity. ie "Hammer the Turd".
Turkey Neck - What occurs out of the stinker from too much anal.
Turkey Shoot - When you're coming, come on her face and let it drip off her chin so it looks like that red shit on the turkey's chin.
Turkish Prison - Where you are so desperately horny you will nail anything without the need for alcohol, dates or nerves. "He's so bad off, he's in a Turkish prison."
Twisted Sister - Have your dominatrix girlfriend dress up in some hot black leather gimp wear and proceed to handcuff your hands behind your back and then force you to your knees. Unsuspecting, diminutive, and cradled over with your ass is in the air, she then gives you the most erotic enema of your life. Now that's some great S&M fun.
Twinkler - The act of 69-ing a girl next shoving your dick into her mouth hard, then you watch her asshole "twinkle" as she gags.
Under Dog - After a hard session at the gym, your armpit muscle begins to twitch; thus giving you the ability to jerk a guy off with your armpit muscle.
Upper Decking - The act of removing the lid of a toilet and taking a deep shit in the tank. Every time the toilet is flushed after that brown, shitty water comes out leaving the owner wondering "what the fuck is wrong with my plumbing?" The trick is to wipe and throw the toilet paper in the bowl forcing them to flush. Perfect for parties and bars
Up on Blocks - When a women is on her Period, The term comes from a car under service. It is undrivable because it is "up on blocks"
The Vacuum - Get into "The Wheelbarrow" position and walk around the room, banging away, whilst commenting on the state of the floor, saying things such as "look at the bits you missed".
Vaginal Seizure - This is when you have finished making love to a woman, busted inside, and she uses her vaginal reflexes to push out your love gravy.
Valsalva - The act of pinching shut (with thumb and forefinger) a woman's nose while receiving fellatio; most effective when employed just prior to the release point due to the gag reflex and ensuing swallow that the woman is forced to do to continue breathing. A great first date ploy, as it sets the stage for what the rules of engagement will be going forward.
Veal Cutlet (see also "Screaming Seagull") - When a man is having sex with a girl on the beach or a sandbox, then pulls out, using the juices on his schlong to roll it around in the sand to collect the breading and then continue having sex (hence the penis is the breaded veal cutlet)
Vegetarian Hot Lunch - A variation of the Hot Lunch in which the diner stretches a piece of saran wrap over her mouth such that chewing (for texture) is possible, but no actual contact with waste product occurs.
Volcano - Blow your load on someone's ass. Then wait for them to fart and cause the cum to spurt out.
VOD - The medical term used when a patient overdoses on viagra and can't get wood anymore.
Waffles with Ice Cream - Hit a chick from the behind with her face pressed up against a chain link fence. Before you climax, turn her around and spill it all over her face, still with the marks from the fence- hence, waffles with ice cream. This can also be done by pressing her back or rear against the fence.
Wake Up Call - Waking up in the middle of the night with the hard on of your life. You then turn to your fast asleep partner and dry fuck her ass into oblivion. The clincher to performing a wake up call is to act like nothing of the sort happened in the morning. E.g. "Sweetheart, what's that on your back?"
The Walk Of Shame - When all of your buds see you walking home in the morning from the house of the nasty bitch they begged you not to fuck the night before.
The Walrus (aka "The White Dragon") - When you come in a girl's mouth, then cover it with your hand and punch her in the tummy. The jizz'll squirt out her nose and give her the appearence of having tusks.
Walt Disney (aka "Ted Williams") - Freeze your crank until it is frozen. Then do a chick with your frozen shaft. It will feel like she is having sex with Walt Disney.
Water Sports (see also "Golden Shower") - Any involvement of Urine in sex
The Wet Biscuit (see also "Ookie Kookie", “Mushy Biscuit”) - 4 or more guys in a circle jerk and a biscuit is in the middle. The last man to jizz on the biscuit has to eat it.
Wet Jessy - Sneak into a girls bedroom while she's sleeping and Jack Off on her.
Werewolf - When 2 guys hold down a chic, and a third guy bends down in tea bag position spreading his cheeks across her face. He then rips ass. Her face will then resemble a werewolf.
Western Grip - When jerking off, turn your hand around, so that your thumb is facing towards you It is the same grip that rodeo folks use Hence, western.
Westside Glaze - Same as the eastside glaze, but the majority of your jizz lands on the left side of her face.
Wet Nap - When you let your load out on a girls pillow, and then make her sleep on it.
The Wheelbarrow - Man and woman are going at it doggystyle on the floor, then the man grabs the woman's legs and stands up, leaving the woman's arms on the ground, and starts running around the room, continuing to bang away...
Whistling Dixie - After you bang a chick, snuggle and let her get comfortable. Right as she is about to fall asleep, scream "The South Will Rise Again!" and shove it in her starfish.
Winnie the Pooh - When you are banging a broad Doggy-Style and you shove your fist up her ass... it proceeds to get stuck, just like Winnie the Pooh in the cave.
Winter Bush - Common to the winter months, bush sometimes grows wild during that time.
Wizards Sleeve - Another word for a large cavernous vagina
The Wooden Indian - Next time your banging a gook, stuff an old dime store wooden Indian up her cunt 'till she's dead. Then throw her in front of a truck. I call this the wooden Indian I think you will too. Great around the holidays. In the event an officer of the law should catch you, just mutter incoherently about Pearl Harbor and Nazis. You're sure to get off.
Woody Woodpecker - While a chick is sucking on your balls, repeatedly tap the head of your cock on her forehead.
Wrecking Ball - While getting head in the shower, swing from the curtain rod, attempting to the knock woman’s head off with your hard cock and swinging sack.
Xena - An ambiguously gay female. Is she gay? is she straight? is she bi? Often arises when she turns down a guy who does not accept rejection well.
Yellow Enema (aka "True Love") - When your sex partner allows you the ultimate pleasure of peeing in their butthole.
Zebra (see also "Oreo") - When two black people enjoy one white person.
The Zombie Mask - While getting head from your favorite, unsuspecting, trash-barrel whore, tell her you want her to look right up at you with those pretty little eyes" when you blow your load. Then, just when you're ready to spew a good week's worth of goo, blast that hefty load in both eyes. This temporary state of blindness will produce the zombie effect as she stumbles around the room with arms outstretched, and moaning like the walking dead.
Zorch - One who sucks farts out of an asshole.
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