A parody of Cast Away, except Chuck isn't alone

[Big_Jims_Worn_Out_Tire_Sale]

If you're not familiar with the "familiar" story, it's about an American spy disguised as a FedEx employee passenger whose plane crashes near a barren island. The character's name is Chuck Norris, I believe, performed by Tom Cruise. Unfortunately, the pilot died. Chuck later violates the corpse because he's disturbed.

As time forwards with no expectancy for rescue, he meets friends inside his head and accepts his reality as he reminds himself, "Ugh, gotta keep breathing to stay alive, so when I do get rescued, I can sue that fucking company for every penny they have and live the rest of my days on an island in peace."

But enough about the original story; I'd like to read a parody involving another islander. That's alive, of course.

 

[ElliottEden]

Wilson gets violated but it's a very deflating moment in the story.

 

[DarkSollat]

Such story may go in many direction. Where the other islander comes from? Did she also survived a crush, the same or another? Or is she a native? What happened to her tribe - is she an exile, or maybe she fucked them all to death? Is the story a slow burn romantic story about them coming to mutual love, or a strictly pornish one about them fucking like animals, maybe helped by aphrodisiac plands endemic to the island?

But my favorite option would be that the story ends with people finding the men and then it turns out there was no other islander - it was a sex doll (selfmade or found among packages), and all things happened in the MC's mind.

 

[Big_Jims_Worn_Out_Tire_Sale]

Wilson gets violated but it's a very deflating moment in the story.

Or Wilson, the volleyball, was packaged by a fentanyl addict. Chuck rips the ball from its packaging and fondles it with his hands. He discovers a white powder residue on his fingers. "What the Biden corruption is this?" he ponders to himself. "Volleyball powder?" The shape of the ball distorts as his surroundings wobble. His heart begins racing. A lump swells in his throat. "Oh, fuck," were the last words he said as he dropped to the sand and died from a fentanyl overdose.

Such story may go in many direction. Where the other islander comes from? Did she also survived a crush, the same or another? Or is she a native? What happened to her tribe - is she an exile, or maybe she fucked them all to death? Is the story a slow burn romantic story about them coming to mutual love, or a strictly pornish one about them fucking like animals, maybe helped by aphrodisiac plands endemic to the island?

But my favorite option would be that the story ends with people finding the men and then it turns out there was no other islander - it was a sex doll (selfmade or found among packages), and all things happened in the MC's mind.

The other islander was neither a figment of his imagination nor a woman, but a man. And he, too, was Lost. His plane was headed to Brazil and crashed a month prior to Chuck's fuck dilemma. He's a drug runner. And he's also a woke Democrat supporter. His business dealings are mostly in South America with the Sounds of Freedom cartels, but his home is on Martha's Vineyard with the rest of the criminals. However, little does he know that a CCP agent sabotaged his plane before it left China.

Perhaps when Chuck's on the beach, after making his first fire, he hears thumps from the woods, but they're not coconuts. Chuck hollers, "What is that?" He runs in circles like a person who should be wearing a helmet. "Is that coconut dropping or something?" A man manifests from the woods, butt naked. Chuck's eyes widen.

"Hey there, feller! Whatcha doing here? I'm Buck. Why are your clothes still on?" Smiling at Chuck, he says as he nears.

"Aha! Look what I've created!" The FedEx employee exclaimed with a sense of enthusiasm, gesturing to the fresh pit, "I have made fire!"

"Oh, my gad! Is it my birthday? Did the universe grant me an autistic, half-naked dummy? I bet you work for UPS, uh, feller?"

And so, as you can see, the story turns into liberal porn.