Old 01-18-2014, 09:43 PM   #76
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After a day counting figures, my mind descends to the oubliette.
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Old 01-18-2014, 10:22 PM   #77
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ladies ,GM , Tzara : i'm havin' fun Dobara !!

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Old 01-19-2014, 12:02 AM   #78
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Your feet, bare and wet on the flagstones. So more erotic than those breasts.
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Old 01-19-2014, 09:53 AM   #79
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tzara View Post
Your feet, bare and wet on the flagstones. So more erotic than those breasts.
isn't that 2 sentences?
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Blessed are the cracked for it is they that let in the light
They say a smile is a gift which is free to the giver and precious to the recipient.
But giving the finger is free, too, and I find it more personal and sincere.
If at first you don't succeed....skydiving is not for you ....
If you don't pay your exorcist .... do you get repossessed?
I shall always decide not to decide, unless of course I decide to change my mind.
....But I, being poor, have only my dreams, I have spread my dreams under your feet,Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.......
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Old 01-19-2014, 10:09 AM   #80
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Blessed are the cracked for it is they that let in the light
They say a smile is a gift which is free to the giver and precious to the recipient.
But giving the finger is free, too, and I find it more personal and sincere.
If at first you don't succeed....skydiving is not for you ....
If you don't pay your exorcist .... do you get repossessed?
I shall always decide not to decide, unless of course I decide to change my mind.
....But I, being poor, have only my dreams, I have spread my dreams under your feet,Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.......
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Old 01-19-2014, 11:09 AM   #81
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isn't that 2 sentences?
Does it have to be one sentence?

woops, edit: from page 1, I see that it should be one single sentence ..and yes what I wrote is more than 17 syllables and it's not even poetic.
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Old 01-19-2014, 11:14 AM   #82
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From the first page, an example with multiple sentences:

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tzara View Post
Rainy night on Union Square, full moon. Want more poems? Wait till I'm dead.
And one with multiple 17 syllable lines:

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Originally Posted by Tzara View Post
He stands at the church steps a long time looking down at new white sneakersó
Determined, goes in the door quickly to make his Sunday confession.
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Old 01-19-2014, 11:17 AM   #83
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Quote:
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From the first page, an example with multiple sentences:



And one with multiple 17 syllable lines:
Ok, which is more important: form or content? If it works, has 17 syllables, is poetic then why not make more than one sentence.
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Old 01-19-2014, 11:25 AM   #84
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if this is rain falling on my face, how comes it feels so very hot?
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Old 01-19-2014, 11:28 AM   #85
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my first

Impressed by the word play that comes from your minds guys.
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Old 01-19-2014, 11:33 AM   #86
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my first

Impressed by the word play that comes from your minds guys.
12? not sure if it needs more or, like ku, can be shorter. *goes back to look at OP*
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Old 01-19-2014, 11:38 AM   #87
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12? not sure if it needs more or, like ku, can be shorter. *goes back to look at OP*
woops yep..only 12 I thought I'd gone through five fingers three times but it seems like I did not

better?? lol
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Old 01-19-2014, 11:38 AM   #88
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MichaelinChina View Post
Ok, which is more important: form or content? If it works, has 17 syllables, is poetic then why not make more than one sentence.
If you're asking my opinion, I think it's content.

This form is so malleable that it justifies anything. You can make multiple sentences, you can make multi-line, anything goes, it seems. I've managed to get away with an "american wall of text" on the 30 in 30, which was not good poetry, but still.

To me, it has the same feeling of a haiku, but where the haiku severely limits what you can say, due to the 5-7-5 scheme, the 17 syllable feels natural for a complete sentence, and it's easy to "pad" a sentence to fit if you're desperate.

The best american sentences I've seen had some kind of twist in them. Something like:

<statement>; <quirky remark>.

Followed by a <ba-dum-tsh!>
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Old 01-19-2014, 11:45 AM   #89
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Quote:
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If you're asking my opinion, I think it's content.

This form is so malleable that it justifies anything. You can make multiple sentences, you can make multi-line, anything goes, it seems. I've managed to get away with an "american wall of text" on the 30 in 30, which was not good poetry, but still.

To me, it has the same feeling of a haiku, but where the haiku severely limits what you can say, due to the 5-7-5 scheme, the 17 syllable feels natural for a complete sentence, and it's easy to "pad" a sentence to fit if you're desperate.

The best american sentences I've seen had some kind of twist in them. Something like:

<statement>; <quirky remark>.

Followed by a <ba-dum-tsh!>
Yes, well I think we can take it as a given that the form of the American sentence is set at 17 syllables and it doesn't matter that there are multiple sentences.

The content therefore does take precedence because we should be poetic, forgetting almost the form. It's like drawing/sketching. I heard a woman yesterday describing her act of drawing as being in a trance, and any interruption would break that connection she had between the subject and her work of art. Separation of form and content... kinda...not sure if I have nailed it here.
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Old 01-19-2014, 11:50 AM   #90
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woops yep..only 12 I thought I'd gone through five fingers three times but it seems like I did not

better?? lol
i think you need an abacus; you're losing track, counting on fingers
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Old 01-19-2014, 04:23 PM   #91
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Syllable checker
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Blessed are the cracked for it is they that let in the light
They say a smile is a gift which is free to the giver and precious to the recipient.
But giving the finger is free, too, and I find it more personal and sincere.
If at first you don't succeed....skydiving is not for you ....
If you don't pay your exorcist .... do you get repossessed?
I shall always decide not to decide, unless of course I decide to change my mind.
....But I, being poor, have only my dreams, I have spread my dreams under your feet,Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.......
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Old 01-19-2014, 04:40 PM   #92
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frothy mocha and wifi, fingertip world - pavement seats, pollution.
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Old 01-19-2014, 05:18 PM   #93
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the bones of all old houses creak; some are sad - others ache, contented.
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Old 01-19-2014, 06:34 PM   #94
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Hamster competition: the wheel in my cage can go faster than yours.
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Old 01-19-2014, 07:54 PM   #95
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Hamster competition: the wheel in my cage can go faster than yours.
lol made me smile
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Blessed are the cracked for it is they that let in the light
They say a smile is a gift which is free to the giver and precious to the recipient.
But giving the finger is free, too, and I find it more personal and sincere.
If at first you don't succeed....skydiving is not for you ....
If you don't pay your exorcist .... do you get repossessed?
I shall always decide not to decide, unless of course I decide to change my mind.
....But I, being poor, have only my dreams, I have spread my dreams under your feet,Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.......
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Old 01-19-2014, 08:00 PM   #96
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Everyone has seen a rainbow, but for me it means the sun has came out.
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Blessed are the cracked for it is they that let in the light
They say a smile is a gift which is free to the giver and precious to the recipient.
But giving the finger is free, too, and I find it more personal and sincere.
If at first you don't succeed....skydiving is not for you ....
If you don't pay your exorcist .... do you get repossessed?
I shall always decide not to decide, unless of course I decide to change my mind.
....But I, being poor, have only my dreams, I have spread my dreams under your feet,Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.......
Nil Caborundum illigitimi
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Old 01-19-2014, 08:02 PM   #97
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lol made me smile
<----- often silly
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Old 01-19-2014, 09:00 PM   #98
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Quote:
Originally Posted by UnderYourSpell View Post
Everyone has seen a rainbow, but for me it means the sun has came out.
A rainbow requires rain to exist... People fixate on their beauty. Interesting, I never thought of them as a marker that the "sun" has come out. Cool AS, UnderYourSpell.

And funny... My intuitive syllable counter sees 3 syllables in "everyone" (e-very-one; I think when I speak it out loud, it sounds a bit like e-vree-one ).

Quote:
Originally Posted by Angeline View Post
Hamster competition: the wheel in my cage can go faster than yours.
That's actually a pretty cool image... Some people might see themselves as caged, doing something that holds no meaning. Hm. It wasn't silly in my eyes.

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Originally Posted by butters View Post
the bones of all old houses creak; some are sad - others ache, contented.
If my house starts creaking, I'm moving out, no matter whether it is sad or contented.

Edit:

If my house starts creaking, whether it's sad or content, I'm moving out.

Haha.

Last edited by Tsotha : 01-19-2014 at 09:07 PM. Reason: Turning my response into an AS.
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Old 01-19-2014, 09:22 PM   #99
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tsotha View Post
A rainbow requires rain to exist... People fixate on their beauty. Interesting, I never thought of them as a marker that the "sun" has come out. Cool AS, UnderYourSpell.

And funny... My intuitive syllable counter sees 3 syllables in "everyone" (e-very-one; I think when I speak it out loud, it sounds a bit like e-vree-one ).



That's actually a pretty cool image... Some people might see themselves as caged, doing something that holds no meaning. Hm. It wasn't silly in my eyes.



If my house starts creaking, I'm moving out, no matter whether it is sad or contented.

Edit:

If my house starts creaking, whether it's sad or content, I'm moving out.

Haha.
I thought it was a funny image that can have a deeper meaning, too. A friend once showed me a cartoon of a man looking out of what appears to be a prison window, but the larger perspective shows it is just a window with no walls around it. So yeah, I was kind of thinking of that.
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Old 01-19-2014, 11:06 PM   #100
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tsotha View Post
A rainbow requires rain to exist... People fixate on their beauty. Interesting, I never thought of them as a marker that the "sun" has come out. Cool AS, UnderYourSpell.

And funny... My intuitive syllable counter sees 3 syllables in "everyone" (e-very-one; I think when I speak it out loud, it sounds a bit like e-vree-one ).



That's actually a pretty cool image... Some people might see themselves as caged, doing something that holds no meaning. Hm. It wasn't silly in my eyes.



If my house starts creaking, I'm moving out, no matter whether it is sad or contented.

Edit:

If my house starts creaking, whether it's sad or content, I'm moving out.

Haha.
I've seen a 'snow rainbow' once a long time ago, wish I could again.
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Blessed are the cracked for it is they that let in the light
They say a smile is a gift which is free to the giver and precious to the recipient.
But giving the finger is free, too, and I find it more personal and sincere.
If at first you don't succeed....skydiving is not for you ....
If you don't pay your exorcist .... do you get repossessed?
I shall always decide not to decide, unless of course I decide to change my mind.
....But I, being poor, have only my dreams, I have spread my dreams under your feet,Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.......
Nil Caborundum illigitimi
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