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Old 02-17-2013, 01:34 AM   #26
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A woman has to be physically attractive to me, which is not the same as having a perfect body.

As for an "erotic mind", I would say yes. I have known a number of women who were sweet and intelligent but lacked an appreciation for the erotic.
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Old 02-20-2013, 07:52 PM   #27
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Quote:
Originally Posted by VWSinger View Post
A woman has to be physically attractive to me, which is not the same as having a perfect body.

As for an "erotic mind", I would say yes. I have known a number of women who were sweet and intelligent but lacked an appreciation for the erotic.
Everybody has their type. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and what one may consider "perfect" others may not think the same.

I think they are one in the same. You must be attracted to someone before you really will want to do anything sexual with them. Having an erotic mind is a bonus.
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Old 02-20-2013, 10:14 PM   #28
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First off, if somebody aint attractive mind doesnt matter. Ive grown to broaden what I find attractive outwardly. Smarts and creativity decideds where we go.Dumb as a rock= we'll fuck, maybe friends(ligjtweight) Your mind is as dirty as mine/intelligent to some degree= perfect.
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Old 02-20-2013, 11:32 PM   #29
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Granted looks will always grab my attention first. However mind and personality is what will keep me interested. My ideal, preferred physical type is a woman with natural, voluptuous, soft curves curves. Zaftig. However, I'd be lying if I didn't say that I appreciate a nice tight butt, a killer set of legs, or perky little breasts. Just not what I'd consider my ideal, cup of tea.

I dated a few women that were more of the stereotypical beauties, or even my ideal tall and curvy as hell smokin' babe, but they didn't last very long due to a lack of connection & spark on the mental and personality aspects. In fact, I recently dated one woman where I was definately out kicking my coverage physically. The sex was great as well, but To be blunt, she's vapid. She would make a great reality TV star.

Likewise, I have been in some extended relationships with women who were not my physical ideal, but we had a great mental and personality spark. The mental and personal connection took them from from just cute to smoking hot and sexy. One in particular is slender and petite. What I would consider skinny and normally would not give a second glance. However, considering the whole package, she is a Spinal Tap 11. If our paths ever cross again and I'm single, I'd jump at the chance to start up again with her.

Basically, looks are all fine and dandy for a fling. But for anything more than that, even for a fuckbuddy, there has to be something more to keep my interest.

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Old 02-20-2013, 11:38 PM   #30
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The mind.

What good is having a sports car if you don't know how to drive it?

The mind drives the body and if a woman has the hottest body you have ever seen, but no desire to enjoy, or allow you to, enjoy it, what's the point?
That was put perfectly.
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Old 02-21-2013, 10:44 AM   #31
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Personally, I need both. I am not a one night stand type, and over time I would miss one or the other. The greatest erotic mind in the world isn't going to keep me interested if you don't take care of yourself...perfection is not required, but a healthy lifestyle is. And likewise the most amazing body would not do it for me for long if there's nothing going on upstairs.

Happily, it turns out it's possible to have both.

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Old 02-21-2013, 12:23 PM   #32
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Another mind/body conundrum?

Standards? Can you fuck those, too?
I woke on the cynical side of the bed this morning. I can see how it may be argued that any sound excuse to have sex could be good enough, be it mind or body, if it's the goal. I've noticed that there are many men in this world who are willing to probe anything with a pulse if it's made easy for them, whatever their preferences may be. Is it a good thing or a bad thing? Meh.
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Old 03-25-2013, 03:46 PM   #33
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Personality - mind - ALWAYS wins out for me. As man_4_milf says it, "the mind is the center of it all!"
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Old 03-25-2013, 04:20 PM   #34
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Barring extreme examples of disfigurement, missing limbs etc, it's mind all the way for me.

1 )Very few women are entirely physically unattractive to the point when one wouldn't be interested in having sex with them.

2) Once one gets over the first impression, the practical difference between an attractive woman and a perfect woman (say, a 7 and a 10) is just not big enough for it to be the decisive factor. Between a supermodel and a girl next door, a typical man will nearly always end up choosing the girl next door because he will expect the supermodel to be spoiled by male attention and more likely to reject him outright.

3) Imperfections of the body can usually be fixed, in theory at least. Diets, exercise, plastic surgery etc. But there's no fixing stupidity or lack of personality.

4) There's psychological research out there demonstrating that it makes perfectly selfish sense to choose a partner who is a notch less attractive than yourself, because the less attractive person in the relationship will be under more pressure to put serious effort into making the relationship work, and will be more willing to compromise.
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Old 03-25-2013, 04:41 PM   #35
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Her mind is definitely more important to me than her body. To be honest, I have a bit of a fondness for imperfect bodies, anyway. I blame Katawa Shoujo...
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Old 03-25-2013, 11:54 PM   #36
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I have never been attracted to someone by their looks other than an initial look (there are a few things I cannot abide). 100% (except a few preferences)their mind. Not just for eroticism but intelligence and humour and just general company. That being said everyone has their own version of what attracts them and I suspect there is a lock for every key.
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Old 03-26-2013, 06:02 PM   #37
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mind over matter
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Old 03-26-2013, 06:41 PM   #38
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Strangely enough, it seems my erotic mind is the big attraction. Of course I will still diet and exercise, but knowing it is the mental imagery I create that is the turn on, I'm thinking agonizing over how large a woman's body is, is overrated. Eat Pray Love was right, gain a few pounds and men don't really care.
Mind always, without being sexist a body without an imagination isn't really a turn on for me. I would much rather roll in the hay with a sexy woman exploring her fantasies.........

I have made love to many women and the the most satisfying are always the ones with erotic minds and the courage to explore them.......
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Old 03-26-2013, 06:44 PM   #39
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Not mind or body, per se

For me it's chemistry. I've met gorgeous (read Greek god/goddess types) who I've got along famously with. Articulate, smart, funny, in all respects the perfect prince (or princess) charming. Mind and bod in one perfect package.

For me, chemistry is intangible. It's the sum of attraction to mind, body, and something else I can't (and never have been able to) put my finger on.

It took me a few years to finally figure out that I am not worthless because a particular person is not attracted to me. It took me a while to feel comfortable in my own skin, despite any insecurities I'm feeling at the time. And yes, I still compare myself negatively to others sometimes, but I'm working on it.

But in the end, I realised that when you are attracted to someone, and the chemistry is there, everything about them is beautiful. And it finally clicked that some people feel that way about me too.

And there are people who feel that way about you too, whoever you are reading this post. They accept and love you, even if you don't realise it yet. And to be honest, does anyone else's opinion really matter? Surround yourself with those who accept you just as you are.

I rarely post such saccharine, and promise to be back on dry form in a few moments! This did however, hit a nerve with me, and I felt to share.
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Old 03-27-2013, 07:11 AM   #40
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I have been turned on sexually and mentally more by a woman I have never met, nor ever seen, more than any physical relationship I have ever had.
It was a true meeting of minds.
As someone once said, the biggest sex organ I have is between my ears, not between my legs

But EVERYONE makes an assumption or judgement on a person with so many seconds of meeting them
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Old 03-27-2013, 08:28 PM   #41
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A perfect body is no good with out the mind
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Old 03-27-2013, 09:19 PM   #42
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I have a dark room...

Turn out the lights and you will use your sexiest voice to tell me an Erotic Fantasy while you touch me? Sure thing Baby!

Erotic Mind!
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Old 03-28-2013, 07:36 PM   #43
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Filthy Mind :)

A few years ago I would have answered body. But now all I fantasize about is someone with an erotic mind. I don't mean that they have a great personality. Just that if someone really wants to fuck you, or turn you on.. it's a big deal. Finding someone who really -knows- how to turn you on well is not easy. At least for me.
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Old 03-29-2013, 05:07 PM   #44
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Define "perfect body." Never seen one.
Standing up waving my hand, here, here, here.

Adding who really cares, hot body, great mind. Or maybe it's a great mind that makes a hot body. Personally I believe in being fit, which mean I prefer intelligent women who are also fit. Which in no way implies perfect.

Erotic mind only works if her erotic desires match my own.
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Old 03-30-2013, 12:58 AM   #45
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Erotic mind. Its not even a contest.
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Old 03-30-2013, 03:11 AM   #46
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Old 04-07-2013, 08:46 AM   #47
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Ok so like even though this is directed at guys...

I have just got to say what's on my mind(haha)

The guys here are choosing between the 2 options ... What I would say is a combination of the 2, how sexy is it knowing that the mutual physical attraction is what draws out all the sinful thoughts from the mind?


Just saying ...
But the mind decides what it finds physically attractive , which can be different for everybody.
We are forced fed societys image of what is supposed to be attractive, but then you look around at all the different couples. Tall with small, fat with thin etc etc.
Fortunately we reject the image makers.
Yes we judge with our eyes within a few seconds of meeting someone, but the mental connection, a persons acts and deeds, kindness, humour, intelligencence is what defines us and connects us to others

"Ways of Seeing"
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Old 04-07-2013, 10:19 PM   #48
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While we are often drawn to a physcal attribute, such as a smile, lovely eyes, a cute bum, it is the mind that draws me in. The quick wit, kindness, assertiveness, can be a total turn on. A good looking man with little brain won't keep me amused for long.

I was thinking how I've met people I thought handsome/pretty, but as I've got to know them and learnt they're mean spirited, I then wonder why I ever thought they were good looking.

On the other hand many years ago I met a chap who I thought was the funniest looking person I'd ever seen. As I got to know him, he was so kind and funny I ended up having quite a crush on him. i wondered why I'd ever thought he was odd looking as he was so handsome. His inner beauty shone through and stole my heart, not that he ever knew that.

I would say i do have a certain type I would always find attractive, but then I could meet someone completely different and find myself thinking they were rather delicious. No rhyme nor reason for that thing called chemistry.

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Old 04-07-2013, 10:26 PM   #49
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Originally Posted by Dyslexicea View Post
Standing up waving my hand, here, here, here.

Adding who really cares, hot body, great mind. Or maybe it's a great mind that makes a hot body. Personally I believe in being fit, which mean I prefer intelligent women who are also fit. Which in no way implies perfect.

Erotic mind only works if her erotic desires match my own.
Pics or the perfect didn't happen.

As much as I might usually find myself daydreaming about someone with the looks of a 20-something athlete, the reality is that the most beautiful woman in the world is the one who wants you. End. Of. Story.
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Old 04-07-2013, 11:03 PM   #50
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Well, this is easy and hard to answer. Yes, to have sex with someone you must be physically attracted. But.....

I have a friend who I have no physical attraction for, but I can talk, text, email and read his stories and get turned on.

There is no "perfect" body. Everyone has something you might not find attractive, but still find them "hot" enough to bed.

We all have our preferences in what we find attractive. A persons personality is just as physical as a tight ass or a great smile. At least to me it is. If someone is dumb as a box of rocks, then they are less attractive to me , as is a man being as short as I am.

So it is all up to the person you are asking.
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