This And That.

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Originally Posted by NaokoSmith

That doesn't sound very offensive, does it? I better not check with my friend though, in case he cuts me off on Facebook.

Youve done enough, dont tempt fate Thank you!

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

The plan is to spend this day improving a MILF tale thats on the drawing board.

The plot is simple: Within the span of 4 years a woman turns 40, her husband dies, her job moves to China, her daughter moves away to college, and she suffers the losers and fools the young have the luxury to ignore and avoid. Then her daughters high school flame comes back to town, he was a sweet indulgent beau, and now he's a fit ex-Marine carrying his shield home from war. For 30 days, anyway. And everyone is so self-absorbed they arent looking. She was fond of the boy who went away.

Hatched an idea for an erotic horror story. I call it THE DEAD CAT IN THE SANCTUARY. Oughta be fun to write.

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Mission accomplished. MILF story done and submitted, Interracial story done and submitted. After the MILF story was filed a kewl idea popped into my noodle and will get used in anuther story. Two more stories are up on the drawing board, one MILF, and the other Loving Wife.

Wrote the first scene of an erotic horror tale I titled DEAD CAT IN THE SANCTUARY. Rich bitch shits when she finds a mongrel terrier in the kennel with her champion Borzoi bitch, locked together tight. It gets crazee when the rich bitch beats the mongrel with a garden rake.

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Found a vid with plenty of blowjobs to study. Some women are artists, plenty make the work look painful (for the male), and a few make it look nasty. But all of them get the job done, with semen flowing from their mouths like lava.

The best specimen involved a mature woman with bad hair coloring, prolly 60 years old. It was like watching a master perform, and she was fully clothed. So I took notes of what she did.

Then I researched men. Nice guys, dangerous guys, and killers. How do the girls sort them out as to appeal and utility and expected results. And I learned a few things I didnt know.

And last, I studied plot structure and verbs.

[NaokoSmith]

I wish I weren't so hungover that laughing this hard makes my head hurt.

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Originally Posted by NaokoSmith

I wish I weren't so hungover that laughing this hard makes my head hurt.

There's plenty of scholarship to go around. When I find rare sexual gems I put them in my tales, to fascinate my readers.

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

This days research is crack whores. Girls with good teeth are rare. So I wasnt surprised that the one girl with good teeth has dentures. Crack destroys the antibacterial properties of saliva.

Crack whores havent changed since I retired 8 years ago. Plenty of them still sleep in storage sheds with wall air conditioners.

[NaokoSmith]

Originally Posted by JAMESBJOHNSON

There's plenty of scholarship to go around. When I find rare sexual gems I put them in my tales, to fascinate my readers.

Full many a gem of purest ray serene.
The dark unfathom'd caves of ocean bear:
Full many a flower is born to blush unseen,
And waste its sweetness on the desert air.

We are lucky to have your scholarly mind discovering these rare sexual gems and blooms for our delectation.

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Originally Posted by NaokoSmith

Full many a gem of purest ray serene.
The dark unfathom'd caves of ocean bear:
Full many a flower is born to blush unseen,
And waste its sweetness on the desert air.

We are lucky to have your scholarly mind discovering these rare sexual gems and blooms for our delectation.

Youre not good at sarcasm, dear, leave it to those who know how to use it.

[NaokoSmith]

Originally Posted by JAMESBJOHNSON

Youre not good at sarcasm, dear, leave it to those who know how to use it.

People often think I'm being sarcastic, I am actually much sweeter than they even imagine. I just like all kinds of different people.

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Originally Posted by NaokoSmith

People often think I'm being sarcastic, I am actually much sweeter than they even imagine. I just like all kinds of different people.

I think you talk a good game but your bull shit stinks.

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

A long time ago I came across an Abe Lincoln quote that impressed me, and its been my guide-star since.

Asked if he fretted much about the burdens of his office and his decisions, he said that he did not, he did what he believed to be best and lived with the consequences, for IF YOU ACT WRONG AND THE END COMES OUT RIGHT, IT DOESNT MATTER; AND IF YOU ACT RIGHT AND THE END COMES OUT WRONG, GOD AND HIS ANGELS SWEARING YOU DID RIGHT CANT SAVE YOU.

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Where in fuck did LITEROTICANS get the idea that LIT is Chautauqua?

Anyway, spent the afternoon examining how popular writers depict sex. I wanted to see how they navigated around 15 minutes of OMG MOAN FUCK THAT PUSSY. George V. Higgins wins the prize for best depiction. He wins becuz his gals piss and do all the usual prep work before daddy puts his hands on their waists and guides her to the launch pad.

There's all kinds of shit out there no LIT writer imagines much less does. Like...pressing your paw against the wall so you can balance yourself while you remove a shoe.He goes into detail about how to fumigate your pussy with spermacide but missed wiping her pussy after she pissed.

I came across another jewel today, an old whore talks about how she can smell pussy on her pimps dick, and will not suck a dick that smells of cunt. Thats good stuff. Makes great dialogue.

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

The Oscars turned out better than I expected. Plenty expected LINCOLN to take every award that mattered but it didnt do so well. Prolly becuz its a sentimental sack o' shit in terms of its historical accuracy.

Read the first chapter of David Halberstam's classic, THE BEST AND THE BRIGHTEST. I own most of the books he published.

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Garden Pix

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Mo Veggies.

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Hatched an Incest story title that doesnt seem to be used anywhere. I can use it for my MILF tales, too.

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Julian_Jaynes

It took me about 35 years to figger this puzzle out, to get what Jaynes was asserting. But he and I differ slightly, I think the archaic mind is still with us and explains much of what we call addictive behavior.

Jaynes said that before 500BC people didnt really think they acted, like animals act. When something hatched in your skull you did it.

From what I see, thats still happening tho we have some volition for opposing the action now. But the old impulses still cause us grief. The Devil really makes us do things.

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Two women stopped by to admire my veggies yesterday. Momma looked 80, and daughter looked late 50s. I wanna fuck momma.

My sensitivity to people is so keen its like radar, and momma was pegging the needle in terms of wanting some action. Momma looks exactly like what she is, a stout farm gal but emits DEFCON 5 lust pulses.

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

So a local pol slapped his wife, she called the cops, the pol went to jail, and the state dropped the charge.

I dont know the particulars, on the face of it, for shits & giggles, males shouldnt hit females. And state lawyers shouldnt take battery lightly. Put the info before a jury, let them decide.

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

A Reader emailed his critique of a story I wrote; I assume he was a he but I'm guessing.

Anyway he says the story has no plot but it does have a plot with complications and aresolution and a crisis. Woman is broke, husband goes to jail, no money for bail or rent, woman takes a job as a lingerie model, makes money, connects with a pimp who can make more money for her.

What the Reader meant is, IT AINT GOT NO HAPPY ENDING! Or IT AINT PRETTY WOMAN with Julia Roberts.

No, it isnt. I decorate my cakes with my fund of experience. Hooking aint romantic. There are no happy crack whores.

The closest I've been to happy hookers is a pimp I usta know. He owned a very large home in a decent neighborhood. His girls lived in the home with their children. The girls got 3 hots, a cot, childcare, and maid-chauffeur service. Plus security. When a girl did an outcall two large men went with her.

What I did was do background checks for the pimp. He wanted no problems with his ladies. What I got from him was info about my ladies. If one of mine vanished I called my pimp to locate her, and he usually called back the same day with her whereabouts.

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Submitted 2 more tales today, I think 5 are in line for approval. Both are interracial. The first involves a crack whore who marries her rehab guy, the other involves a black executive with a dyno-mite business plan. Make it tough for people to do business anywhere else, give em what they really want.

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

TODAY IS PAYDAY, and so is tomorrow.

Retirement has been pretty okay so far. The house is paid off. No bills to speak of except cable, garbage, water, car insurance, the usual stuff.

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Two more tales were approved today. People think I make this shit up but 99.99% of it comes from REAL LIFE. Like the tale where the woman calls mental health for a referral someplace to learn how to be a lesbian. She and I got to be good friends, good looking woman, but crazee as a shithouse rat for her married boyfriend who treated her bad. Usta babysit his kid while he was fucking other women or his wife.

The other story reminds me of my high school honeys mama. Fine looking gal. Liked me a lot. I talked to my old flame after mama died, and she told me Mama really liked me. I know!

Working on an incest tale. Mama, sonny, and sis take a drive across America. Think I'll call it STINKY FINGER.

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Set up my extension ladder to paint the trim around the roof. Started at the ridge and worked my way down. Get the tough stuff outta the way first.

Got into a fight at the restaurant, the buffet had more empty holes than Swiss cheese so I made a visit to the kitchen to give the cooks a pep talk, IS THAT FISH WORKING OR YOU GUYS JUST TALKING ABOUT IT? THE MANAGER WASNT HAPPY WITH ME. AND SHE REALLY WASNT A FAN AFTER I POINTED OUT HER MANY FAULTS. A kitchen fulla niggas with knives and one me, just about a tie. I got my fish, though. Then I told my server, IT SUX TO BE YOU, she was flirting with me, YOU DONE ALREADY? WHY I JUST KNEW I'D REFILL YOUR TEA MORE THAN ONCE! And I looked at her and said, IT SUX TO BE YOU. Then I got into two more fights, one at the lumber yard (Lenny & Squiggy were trying to use a bank card), and when I got home a city truck blocked my drive way so I told the guys to move the fucking truck! Then I talked to the two lesbos next door about the tree the guys were cutting down. I swear they seemed hot for me. One looks like George Goebel, the other looks like my pal Stewart Prince, he's 300 pounds, crew cut, plastic rimmed glasses, and a pocket protector. So I never believe any of the AH lesbos bull shit about how fine they are.