Old 02-12-2013, 10:29 PM   #1
Thenewerpenguin
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Need ideas

My gf really loves the whole bdsm scene, and honestly, I'm enjoying it too. We've done some light tied-up stuff, biting, scratching. I have a feeling she would be willing to go farther, but I have no idea on how to get to that next level, or beyond. Tips, hints, and suggestions will be appreciated.
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Old 02-13-2013, 12:31 AM   #2
Stella_Omega
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I always suggest these three books: "The new topping book" and "The new Bottoming Book" and "Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns."

Geeze, they are nearly twenty years old now! There are other books available, but these three are still ranked among the best.
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Old 02-13-2013, 08:08 AM   #3
Sir_Winston54
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And along with the *Stellar* advice above (I crack me up sometimes!), I like to suggest that partners, especially those new to the BDSM culture/activities, actually sit down together and discuss the things that turn them on, that leave them going, "Ho-hum," that squick them the hell out.

The usual way I suggest that is: "Communicate. CoMmUnIcAtE. COMMUNI-freakin'-CATE!" It's vital to any relationship. Not just BDSM relationships, all of them, but especially where one (or both) is(are) doing things that have the potential to cause damage (not just red handprints on butt flesh, but deep muscle bruising, cracked/broken bones, injury to internal organs, etc., up to and including the ultimate damage: death) to the other. You both need to know exactly what page the other is on, and you both need to trust one another implicitly. That requires communication.
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Last edited by Sir_Winston54 : 02-14-2013 at 03:17 PM.
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Old 02-14-2013, 01:55 PM   #4
ladylover6984
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Some may doubt this but I think this is inline with having open communication its a check list that each of you can fill out to see what the others interests might be here is a fine example

http://latches.webslaves.com/checklist.htm

In some cases it might be easier to fill out this kind of thing on the pc or on paper then actually saying it out loud
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