Quote:
Originally Posted by farfromtree
That put my mind in overdrive!
The girls hate their repressive dorm lifestyle and conspire to send the dorm mother on a wild goose chase somewhere outside the dorm as they take turns fucking the girl's brother. Add some good old fashioned Catholic school girl lesbian action to the story too? Would making some of the girls guy on girl virgins be over the top?
None of the girls are on the pill. There is some disagreement within the group but ultimately it is agreed he will not use a condom. If he is young enough he can rebound quickly from his first orgasm and creampie more than one of the girls.
The thought of this is making me so horny right now! I volunteer to write the story if spikeal decides not to proceed with it.
|
Uh, glad for your readers I inspired soemthing?
You can add lesbian action but it seems to me that would happen at other times so the girls wouldnt focus much on that. (they dont get men around so thats why they are presumably agreeing to be group fucked, right? Desperation/lack of penis availability)
You can do the arguing about the condom thing but why? If they are so catholic as to not use bc, wouldnt having the partner us it be against their "code" too? Make him catholic too, his sis is. No rubbers ever.
Guy w/girl virgins wouldnt be over the top but hard to pull off. You have a woman who has no clue as to how shes going to react to this situation doing it IN FRONT OF all her friends/classmates. I always have trouble with "virgins" suddenly engaging in non virginal behavior "because penis is there" Doesnt mean you cant do that, just be aware of its pros/cons.
yes a young man can do the multiorgasms in a night thing but he'd need to have been a bit of a cocksman at some point to be able to do this now. Dont make the bro a virgin or inexperienced then have him servicing woman after woman like some sort of machine.
And is there really any surprise in the cum receiver being the sister? I mean, shes the only one with a story or "bigger issue" than pregnancy so from the start the reader is going to expect her to get it. No suspense there.
If you want a much better angle (imo) have the brother start with one girl to get his bearings then once he's got a hold of himself/stroke control, have the sister have her turn. (we all know shes going to get it if its in incest category so no surprise lost here) Its 2nd/ so early because she or he (chose which best suits your ending) DOESNT want her to be the one come in and suit those reasons to the end as well.
Play up the fact hes in control, trying NOT to come in her., no overwhelmed feeling, no surprises. Hell, maybe even have him semi turned off (stays just hard enough to stay in, obviously not blowing his mind/rocking his world.)
She, on the other hand, gets turned on wildly by the situation but him not into her as much keeps her from "getting over the hump"
They go for a bit then he decides to give it a rest, move on to next girl. Maybe he even blames the switch on her being too turning on but she knows its the opposite.
So now sis is still highly aroused and very dejected.
Has to watch her other friends as they build up his excitement, take him closer to orgasm than she did. Jealousy ensues.
They all have a go round, some even get off (dont have every one, its cliche) ALL seem to at least enjoy the experience for some reason or another (its not all orgasm for women all the time)
He rocks the last girl's socks off (sis roommate?) , she comes hard. Once she recovers she does all that she can to get HIM off finally in totally appreciation for her own best ever orgasm. It gets him close but he plateaus because hes been doing the same damn thing over and over for hours. Somethings missing. He's at a loss.
Sis sees this and forcefully takes over. Things get way out of hand/taken to an unbelievable level. (heres where youd play up the incest if you like) Have her really focus on the wickedness etc. now if you are going to do it.
As she literally loses her mind trying to get her brother to pop, have her friends get so turned on by the spectacle, they have to relieve themselves. (i wouldnt go full bore girl v. girl. Maybe mutual masterbation and some talk between them as to whats going on "Can you believe she just said that? OMG thats so fucking hot how she did X or Y, etc. I thought I fucked him good but she doing things I can even dream of let alone do.)
So now you've got brother taken close to O by the girl he originally wanted most but now he realizes his sister is the only one who'll can get him off the way he now desperately wants too (she has to take him FURTHER than even he thought he could go)
She's switched the tables on him. Shes in control. She's his sister. And now he is completely beholden to whatever she wants if only she'll make him come and hes got to come to terms with that in order for it to happen.
Oh and there's an audience so overwhelmed by the two of them, they have to play with themselves only WATCHING it.
What a mind fuck that must be when you realize YOU are the ones causing this insanity. They are desperate to BE you.
Its no longer whether or not the two of you will come but if all your body parts will stay attached after you do.
Amp it up. Play around with more usual themes. Switch up perspectives and emotions whenever you can and still have it make sense.
Stroke stories are often too one note.
Write a brother/sister/group symphony.
It'll get read, I promise.
* If I get enough interest/feedback I may even write it (or a variation of it) myself. I need to work out a few more themes to play with though.
I dont want that to keep anyone else from moving forward though if they decide to. Its more just for me to get a gauge of if Im on the right track at all and if there'd be an audience for it if I were to move forward. PMs welcomed from anyone with good or bad feedback, ideas, thoughts, what have you.
E
great ideas there - can't wait to see a story like this go live
