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Old 03-19-2013, 05:20 PM   #826
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I invited a bunch of my emo friends to come live with us. I told them you wouldn't mind cooking and doing their laundry for them.
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Old 03-19-2013, 05:20 PM   #827
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I love it when you twitter my clitter.
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Old 03-19-2013, 05:21 PM   #828
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I get the feeling that a hundred men have climbed this mountain before me.
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Old 03-19-2013, 05:21 PM   #829
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Wow!! That's one hell of a big taco!
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Old 03-19-2013, 05:22 PM   #830
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Why yes, I do love my computer more than you. Have you got a problem with that?
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Old 03-19-2013, 05:22 PM   #831
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I thought that I'd better warn you now. I have a bad urination problem whenever I sleep with another person.
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Old 03-19-2013, 05:23 PM   #832
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Have you been eating broccoli and spinach all day long?
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Old 03-19-2013, 05:23 PM   #833
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Now we both have herpes!!
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Old 03-19-2013, 05:27 PM   #834
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Promise me that you'll stop sleeping with my sister after we get married.
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Old 03-19-2013, 05:28 PM   #835
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Turn to my webcam and wave goodbye to everybody.
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Old 03-19-2013, 05:28 PM   #836
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Can we make love in a bathtub full of butter beans?
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Old 03-19-2013, 05:28 PM   #837
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I've had a hard time making love on a beach ever since my bad experience with a naughty hermit crab.
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Old 03-19-2013, 05:29 PM   #838
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Cool

You can never have too much horsepower when it comes to sex toys.
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Old 03-19-2013, 05:30 PM   #839
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I said that I like to make love to EMO music, not ELMO music.
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Old 03-19-2013, 05:31 PM   #840
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Did there happen to be a few turds floating in your gene pool?
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Old 03-19-2013, 05:31 PM   #841
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You're going to have to go easy on me. My pacemaker battery was made in China.
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Old 03-19-2013, 05:32 PM   #842
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Uh oh. Gotta go. My ankle bracelet is beeping. My parole officer is going to be looking for me.
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Old 03-19-2013, 05:32 PM   #843
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Would you like some 'moa' of my boa?
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Old 03-19-2013, 05:33 PM   #844
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Do you think that we could have a threesome with your mom, and your grandmother?
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Old 03-19-2013, 05:33 PM   #845
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You're way prettier than all those women in my porn video collection.
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Old 03-19-2013, 05:40 PM   #846
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Unhappy After the sex is over...

"Wow, and you're not even a hooker!"

(Actual quote from an actual guy, who, I assure you, never saw me naked again.)
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Old 03-19-2013, 05:46 PM   #847
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Cool

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ember_on_ice View Post
"Wow, and you're not even a hooker!"

(Actual quote from an actual guy, who, I assure you, never saw me naked again.)
Wow, I am sorry that happened. Asshole phrases like that do not make you feel good about yourself.

PS: I would laugh if he saw that on here, someone that would say that fits the profile of the membership of the Litt General board.
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Old 03-19-2013, 06:24 PM   #848
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Good sex always makes me hungry. I feel full.
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Old 03-19-2013, 06:26 PM   #849
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Oh good. You're conscious again. While you were passed out, I drew smiley faces on your boobs, but I could only find a permanent marker.
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Old 03-19-2013, 06:26 PM   #850
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You might want to quit your job at the nuclear power plant. Your implants are glowing.
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