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Old 12-10-2012, 02:50 AM   #301
Acktion
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"So, I was listening to Dr. Ruth and...."
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Old 12-10-2012, 02:52 AM   #302
Acktion
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"Um... did our belly buttons just form suction, or... oops, never mind. I shouldn't have eaten that third chalupa."
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Last edited by Acktion : 12-10-2012 at 03:06 AM.
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Old 12-10-2012, 02:59 AM   #303
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"Hnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnkkkkkk zzzzzzz Hnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnkkkkkk zzzzzzz
Hnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnkkkkkk zzzzzzz. No, Daddy, don't touch me there. Hnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnkkkkkk zzzzzzz *snort* Oh, hey. I must have dozed off for a moment. But, that was feeling really good. Why'd you stop?"
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Old 12-10-2012, 03:03 AM   #304
Acktion
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"So, like, you know, have you ever thought about what it must be like for old people to do this? (bubblegum snaps) I mean, like, our grandparents and stuff?"
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Old 12-10-2012, 03:08 AM   #305
Acktion
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"So, my last boyfriend broke up with me because he said I sound like Fran Drescher. I don't know what he meant by that. Do you?"
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Old 12-10-2012, 11:00 AM   #306
loquere
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Cool

So when do we go shopping?
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Old 12-10-2012, 11:41 AM   #307
TE999
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I used to be disgusted, now I'm just amused.

Never be led astray into the paths of virtue.

Artists are misunderstood. Not by people, but by themselves.

Life is but active anguish in a context of flux.

"Popularity is not whether people like you, it's how many people would like you to like them." Anon.

"Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company." Mark Twain (Samuel L. Clemens)

"Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret." Ambrose Bierce

"When my ugly ol' car won't climb the hill, I'll write a suicide note on a hundred dollar bill." 'Heavy Fuel' Dire Straits

"I'd rather laugh with the sinners than cry with the saints, the sinners are much more fun ..." 'Only the Good Die Young' Billy Joel

TE's stories: http://www.literotica.com/stories/me...ge=submissions
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Old 12-10-2012, 11:56 AM   #308
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"Hun, you;ve got a funny mark on your head I never noticed before....Say's 66 can;t make out the last digit."
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Old 12-10-2012, 01:33 PM   #309
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"Hun, you;ve got a funny mark on your head I never noticed before....Say's 66 can;t make out the last digit."
Ha!!!!!
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Old 12-10-2012, 01:34 PM   #310
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My fathers a baptist minister
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Old 12-10-2012, 01:43 PM   #311
Tio_Narratore
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Don't worry, Tom. It's safe to have sex tonight; I emptied the powder from Dad's shotgun shells.
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Link to my stories...

http://www.literotica.com/stories/me...ge=submissions
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Old 12-10-2012, 04:24 PM   #312
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Talking

I never though I'd have to say this but your actually too big.
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Old 12-10-2012, 04:54 PM   #313
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"If you're gonna have sex with me tonight, you're gonna have to put a thimble on it."
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Old 12-11-2012, 02:48 AM   #314
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My fathers a baptist minister
Er... actually... no, never mind.
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Old 12-11-2012, 05:59 AM   #315
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"Good evening. I am the T1200. I will be your Sex robot tonight."

"Left hand on left breast."

"Right hand on right breast. Twist nipple...."
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Old 12-11-2012, 02:11 PM   #316
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giggity giggity alright
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Old 12-12-2012, 02:05 PM   #317
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Old 12-12-2012, 09:45 PM   #318
LaRascasse
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"You'll love this part, it always makes your sister squeal."
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My stories in case you are interested. Offbeat, unconventional and just a bit dark. Just a bit, I swear


To see a World in a Grain of Sand
And a Heaven in a Wild Flower
Hold Infinity in the palm of your hand
And Eternity in an hour
-William Blake
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Old 12-12-2012, 10:10 PM   #319
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Old 12-13-2012, 12:38 AM   #320
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Has anybody mentioned a yawn?
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Old 12-13-2012, 04:49 AM   #321
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Exquisition View Post
"Good evening. I am the T1200. I will be your Sex robot tonight."
"Left hand on left breast."
"Right hand on right breast. Twist nipple...."
I see you've met my Ex, then.
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If it ain't broke, don't fix it.

Handley Page

Incident at Cemetery Junction.
" Pest Control."
"Mavis's Car Trip."
"Norman-the-dragon. "
"Stacy & the Angel. "
" Earth Tremor on Stage ? "
" Charlie's Story. "
" How to do Audio. "
http://www.literotica.com/stories/me...php?uid=883259
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Old 12-14-2012, 08:44 AM   #322
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Quote:
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"So, I was listening to Dr. Ruth and...."
A co-worker of mine was invited to appear on a nationally syndicated talk show. He invited our boss to be there for the event. While the co-worker was on stage with the host, our boss was left in the green room sitting across from Dr. Ruth. We still laugh about the imagined conversations between the two and always end with, "So, what DO you say to Dr. Ruth?"

"Hey, have you ever tried....?" I don't know.
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Old 12-14-2012, 09:05 AM   #323
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Old 12-14-2012, 10:16 AM   #324
Exquisition
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Quote:
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"You'll love this part, it always makes your sister squeal."
lol. Very good!
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Old 12-14-2012, 10:17 AM   #325
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"That's a bit of a turn up. The dog's tighter."
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