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Old 12-06-2012, 09:01 AM   #1
EroticElectric
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Smile The Problem With Being Bi :(

Well, its sort of simple. I'm at a point in my life where I'd like to fall in love and have a happy/sexual relationship, I just don't know if I want to date a woman or a man. I know i can be really happy with a woman, but i also know i like men. It's not a cock or pussy contest, but I think I like women a little more. It's sort of confusing. I don't know.

Tips? (i'm also not out about being Bi so i'm a little nervous)
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Old 12-06-2012, 09:28 AM   #2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by EroticElectric View Post
Well, its sort of simple. I'm at a point in my life where I'd like to fall in love and have a happy/sexual relationship, I just don't know if I want to date a woman or a man. I know i can be really happy with a woman, but i also know i like men. It's not a cock or pussy contest, but I think I like women a little more. It's sort of confusing. I don't know.

Tips? (i'm also not out about being Bi so i'm a little nervous)
HOw old are you and what have your experiences been on both sides of the fence?
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Old 12-06-2012, 12:45 PM   #3
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I'm doing both. I'm dating a man and a woman right now and truly love both of them. We all hang out together and are good friends. I take them both on dates and have sex with both. It is the only way to satisfy who I am and be true to myself.
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Old 12-06-2012, 02:06 PM   #4
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"dating" is not a relationship. it's the part you do for a while while you get to know the person. The question isn't "should I date a man or a woman?" the question is "will I find the person that is right for me, and me for them?"

Date a bunch of people. Kiss a bunch of frogs. Enjoy dating for its own sake.
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Old 12-06-2012, 08:19 PM   #5
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Polyamory?

Why not try for a Poly life? I am in a triad wtih two bisexual males who often say they have the very best of both worlds. It's hard to find the right combination, but it was well worth the search. Perhaps the two partners you have would be interested in that as well.
Best of luck
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Old 12-07-2012, 05:37 PM   #6
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Originally Posted by Stella_Omega View Post
"dating" is not a relationship. it's the part you do for a while while you get to know the person. The question isn't "should I date a man or a woman?" the question is "will I find the person that is right for me, and me for them?"

Date a bunch of people. Kiss a bunch of frogs. Enjoy dating for its own sake.
I have to agree with Stella.

I'd surely like to know how you intend to just fall in love with someone. I've had lots of dates, lots of hook ups, lots of sex but I've only been in love twice in my life and I surely didn't just decide to fall in love. It just happened.

For me it had to be a woman, I don't have a choice, but hon your bi just let it happen with whoever, love for you shouldn't be a gender issues.

As far as being out, don't worry about it, if you happen to fall in love with a woman that's the time you need to deal with coming out. That is assuming your a woman, at least I think you are.
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Old 12-07-2012, 06:17 PM   #7
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The Polyamorous lifestyle is what you need to do. Then you can fall in love with both of them. Society thinks it is wrong, but do what you need to do to be happy.
Quote:
Originally Posted by EroticElectric View Post
Well, its sort of simple. I'm at a point in my life where I'd like to fall in love and have a happy/sexual relationship, I just don't know if I want to date a woman or a man. I know i can be really happy with a woman, but i also know i like men. It's not a cock or pussy contest, but I think I like women a little more. It's sort of confusing. I don't know.

Tips? (i'm also not out about being Bi so i'm a little nervous)
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Old 12-08-2012, 07:01 AM   #8
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I'm actually a guy...

Most of my serious experience has been with girls...dated a girl for six years, and we planned on marriage, she went a little nuts on me, really broke me down. I had a puppy love crush on this girl in high school, and it felt like love and we were together for 6 months but just really held hands. I've let guys go down on me, on occasion, make out with some, but i dont go out and do that often. I've also gone on a couple "dates" with guys, like out to dinner, and thats nice. I'd like to have the best of both worlds, a girl to fall in love with (i think its a different kind of passion) and a guy who i fall in love with and they'd both be my best friends and we would all trust each implicity, and the sex would really really amazing.

Thanks for the advice stella. I'm fairly pretty for a guy...funny story, first time i have had a hot and heavy make out session i was 18, it was with a very pretty lesbian.
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Old 12-08-2012, 07:04 AM   #9
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Originally Posted by EroticElectric View Post
I'm actually a guy...

Most of my serious experience has been with girls...dated a girl for six years, and we planned on marriage, she went a little nuts on me, really broke me down. I had a puppy love crush on this girl in high school, and it felt like love and we were together for 6 months but just really held hands. I've let guys go down on me, on occasion, make out with some, but i dont go out and do that often. I've also gone on a couple "dates" with guys, like out to dinner, and thats nice. I'd like to have the best of both worlds, a girl to fall in love with (i think its a different kind of passion) and a guy who i fall in love with and they'd both be my best friends and we would all trust each implicity, and the sex would really really amazing.

Thanks for the advice stella. I'm fairly pretty for a guy...funny story, first time i have had a hot and heavy make out session i was 18, it was with a very pretty lesbian.
Men are much more fun and passionate to other men..try it!
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Old 12-08-2012, 04:20 PM   #10
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I do hope that you find the one that makes everything better because that is what it is all about anyway isn't it? Maybe one day when everyone stops worrying about being Bi or Straight or Gay.......wouldn't it be wonderful if we did not even need those terms anymore? Think about that one. We just had someone to love and be loved by. Period. I wish I even had the nerve to tell the world I want to be Bi and not worry about what follows but like I said earlier, some goals are easier to achieve than others.
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Old 12-08-2012, 04:28 PM   #11
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I do hope that you find the one that makes everything better because that is what it is all about anyway isn't it? Maybe one day when everyone stops worrying about being Bi or Straight or Gay.......wouldn't it be wonderful if we did not even need those terms anymore? Think about that one. We just had someone to love and be loved by. Period. I wish I even had the nerve to tell the world I want to be Bi and not worry about what follows but like I said earlier, some goals are easier to achieve than others.
You go girl!
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Old 12-10-2012, 02:11 AM   #12
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It's a Primate Thing...

Bonobo chimps are our closest genetic relatives. They are "trisexual" because they'll try anything sexual at the drop of a hat - any hat. Male-female, male-male, female-female - they do it all.

I don't think humans are all that different. Freed of cultural constraints and artificial values imposed by self-righteous, self-appointed "authorities," we'd probably be the same way.

If it feels good and it harms none - just do it. We're just glorified chimps, after all.
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Old 12-11-2012, 10:57 AM   #13
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I'm bi-sexual, and my advice to you is simple: stop looking at people by gender, and start looking at them as people. Go out to date, and let yourself relax. If you feel more attracted to someone than others; whether male or female, they're obviously for you, at this point in your life If it turns out they're not, don't be disheartened. Just don't get into the rut of comparing the two genders, whether off stereotype, past experiences or whatever else. Just remember that eventually, you will find someone that makes you very happy - so enjoy the journey of finding the bastard!

Sorry if this advice has been said earlier on; just my two cents! Good luck with finding your next relationship, and I hope you manage to have fun during the chase.
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Old 12-11-2012, 05:06 PM   #14
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Well, its sort of simple. I'm at a point in my life where I'd like to fall in love and have a happy/sexual relationship, I just don't know if I want to date a woman or a man. I know i can be really happy with a woman, but i also know i like men. It's not a cock or pussy contest, but I think I like women a little more. It's sort of confusing. I don't know.

Tips? (i'm also not out about being Bi so i'm a little nervous)
You definitely don't just fall in love out of the blue (usually...). I don't think you can just decide whether or not you're going to fall in love and live happily ever after with a man or a woman. You have to date and get to know people before you can just make that decision.

There are a lot of different men and women out there, and a lot of different views out there as well. Maybe you'll experiment with a poly life, maybe you'll end up with a woman/man who's just like you, and you'll both go have a night of excellent dick/pussy once every month or so.

I thought I was bi once upon a time. Your concern was my chief concern at one time. It didn't last, because I realized pretty quickly that I was not bi...I'm a lesbian, but I still understand where you're coming from. Date lots of people, make lots of new friends.
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Old 12-11-2012, 06:09 PM   #15
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I agree with the others, date people (not gender) and see where it goes. Falling in love is a lot more then sexuality, it is a combination of things that make people compatible, and when it happens it happens. It could be you are bi, it could be you think you are bi but really are gay, could be a lot of things, and you won't know until you get out there and experience it, that is what dating is for. I had a friend in college who was engaged to a girl he really loved, they were getting all set to get married, and she died in an auto accident, and he then fell in love with a guy, it happens.

I would simply go out there and date, and when you fall in love, you fall in love, whether it is a guy or a gal, and take it from there. If you do fall in love, then you might have some things to think about, like if you get married/hitched can you be monogamous? I have known bi guys who married wives understanding their nature, and they had great times with MMF threesomes, I have known bi guys who married and were perfectly monogamous, same with women....but you won't have to worry about that until you get serious with someone I think.
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Old 12-11-2012, 10:41 PM   #16
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well i have been dating both genders, and i find that i usually crush a bit harder but also have interests in guys but it feels more casual with them. Pretty sure at this point that I'm ACTUALLY bisexual. Wouldn't preclude monogamy with either gender or even a MMF...or MFF...or MFMF lol
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Old 12-12-2012, 10:26 AM   #17
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It's all good

Sounds like you have lots of options open to you.....Enjoy the attraction wherever it takes you...I don't think you would have to decide on one gender or another...finding a person you can really click with would be a good starting point.....I imagine your momentary desires will lead you in the right direction......enjoy the passionate journey....Do they have gay speed dating?...or sex clubs where you're at..... That might open up your options.....
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