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Old 10-21-2012, 05:33 AM   #26
stickygirl
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Hehe! He is cute Arlan, I'll give you that!
Here's question for you and for everyone - including you TG lurkers out there!
What was you earliest memory of your dysphoria ( I'll save you the Google, dysphoria = Am I a girl or a boy or something else, WTF? )
Here's the first one I can recall, which would be looking through my Mum's dress-making patterns to find one for me. I had a plan I could short-stitch the whole thing together as I didn't know how to use a sewing machine. The whole plan got shot down in flames by my Mum who asked with her 'slightly shocked voice' "You're not trying to make a dress are you?"
Jeez - you know, writing that brings back all the same emotions. Up to that point I hadn't occurred to me that it was gender thing ( I just wanted a damned dress ) but, at that moment I realised: Owch! Boys don't make dresses do they? / Mum doesn't sound too happy / Eek! So I did the emergency back-out by replying with a voice stung by false accusation "No!" I still remember how I felt both embarrassed I'd been found out but also how annoyed I wasn't going to have a dress. Grrr! I suppose I was about 10 or 11yrs.

So! That's my truth or dare story: there are numerous others but I sure as hell ain't gonna put them down here!!! Who's next?
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Old 10-21-2012, 10:40 AM   #27
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Originally Posted by stickygirl View Post
Hehe! He is cute Arlan, I'll give you that!
Here's question for you and for everyone - including you TG lurkers out there!
What was you earliest memory of your dysphoria ( I'll save you the Google, dysphoria = Am I a girl or a boy or something else, WTF? )
Here's the first one I can recall, which would be looking through my Mum's dress-making patterns to find one for me. I had a plan I could short-stitch the whole thing together as I didn't know how to use a sewing machine. The whole plan got shot down in flames by my Mum who asked with her 'slightly shocked voice' "You're not trying to make a dress are you?"
Jeez - you know, writing that brings back all the same emotions. Up to that point I hadn't occurred to me that it was gender thing ( I just wanted a damned dress ) but, at that moment I realised: Owch! Boys don't make dresses do they? / Mum doesn't sound too happy / Eek! So I did the emergency back-out by replying with a voice stung by false accusation "No!" I still remember how I felt both embarrassed I'd been found out but also how annoyed I wasn't going to have a dress. Grrr! I suppose I was about 10 or 11yrs.

So! That's my truth or dare story: there are numerous others but I sure as hell ain't gonna put them down here!!! Who's next?
When I was 4 or 5, I used to play a super hero game with my cousin Tom, until until one day Tom said that he got to have super strength and I didn't because he was a boy and boys are stronger. I was insulted, and stormed upstairs to tell my mom and my aunt what Tom said, sure that he was just being stupid and they would tell him so. Instead, my mother the statistician said it was partly true and explained bell curves and sexual dimorphism in adulthood, as it relates to strength, in terms that a 4 yr old could understand.

It seemed so deeply unfair, and it was little consolation that the grown-ups pointed out to Tom that *neither* of us had, or ever would have, super strength, so it was silly for him to say it was more realistic for him to have it, and we could both pretend to have whatever super powers we wanted.

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Old 10-21-2012, 10:44 AM   #28
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For me, I knew way before that, at least pre-Kindergarden, so probably 4 or 5. Because my mom was single, I really had no father figure in my life. I had an older brother, but he wasn't very involved, so it was really just me and my sister. I remember when my sister would have a sleepover with a friend, they would dress me up and put make-up on me. I didn't think anything of it, I lived with women for goodness sake, and gender roles were never an issue that was raised by my mother. I knew I was a boy, genetically, but I didn't have anyone over my shoulder telling me that's not how boys act. Obviously I knew that's how girls acted, so I just assumed I was one of the girls.

But certainly I felt my dysphoria when I would play with the little boy next store. He came from a broken home also, so it seems we would channel what we were both missing in our lives and play "house". I'd always insist on being the Mommy. I always took my teddy bear to his house (that was our baby) <3, and we'd sit in his room, or the garage, and I'd make them breakfast or dinner, or we would play in the car, and pretend we were driving somewhere, but always I was the Mom. The woman. I remember we would even kiss and talk about having more babies. I remember getting so excited thinking I was going to have a baby!

Obviously, that has and will never happen, but the feelings of being a woman have never gone away.

Because I am one.
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Old 10-21-2012, 11:00 AM   #29
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But certainly I felt my dysphoria when I would play with the little boy next store. He came from a broken home also, so it seems we would channel what we were both missing in our lives and play "house". I'd always insist on being the Mommy. I always took my teddy bear to his house (that was our baby) <3, and we'd sit in his room, or the garage, and I'd make them breakfast or dinner, or we would play in the car, and pretend we were driving somewhere, but always I was the Mom. The woman. I remember we would even kiss and talk about having more babies. I remember getting so excited thinking I was going to have a baby!

Obviously, that has and will never happen, but the feelings of being a woman have never gone away.

Because I am one.
OMG - Stacey, you've just reminded me of something at kindagarten, but that can wait: these are such lovely tales
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Old 10-21-2012, 11:28 AM   #30
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OMG - Stacey, you've just reminded me of something at kindagarten, but that can wait: these are such lovely tales
I love opening myself this way! I've never really shared any of these stories before, and I think it's important that we do, so that we can maybe understand ourselves a little better!

<3
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Old 10-21-2012, 04:08 PM   #31
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I wanna be him. He does stupid/crazy things wholeheartedly all the time, takes a lot of falls, and still manages to be cool.
Oh yeah, Spike is one of my role model dudes too, now that you mention it.
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Old 10-21-2012, 04:31 PM   #32
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I'll come back to this, but there are two elements to my dysphoria; one is that all of my life I have woken up grabbing for the piss-hardon that isn't actually there. The visceral feeling of having a cock.

The other issue is that I was raised in a household that paid lipservice to feminism-- and at the very same time, my father preferred that women be decorative, objects of pleasure, adorable, childlike. My mother alternately fought against this notion and acquiesced to it. I'm living with them now; the damage is evident in both of them.

But for me, I was motivated to DO things, BE the hero, Save the world. I wasn't getting any messages that girls could do those things. I played that I was Robin Hood, never Maid Marion. I could tell the dirfference between BatMAN and BatGIRL. (and women were called 'girls' in society in general)

To be fair, my dad taught me carpentry, got me up on the roof to repair it alongside him-- but the schools did a fair amount of stifling of sexual roles back then. Girls couldn't wear pants or jeans untill I was fourteen. And we couldn't play a whole lot of sports because of that.

Meh. My young cousins are ten years younger than me, and they both took any shop classes they wanted. So things have changed in that regard.

These days, I am pretty okay with being a genderqueer woman with a phantom cock and a very nice pussy, but that's a re-definition that took years to comprehend.
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Old 10-21-2012, 04:46 PM   #33
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I am tall and slender and wish I was beautiful, and have always fantasized about being a tall slender, beautiful women. Nicole is so awesomely beautiful and sexy, and she is even a very accomplished actress. I can even forgive her for the Tom Cruise mistake.
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Old 10-21-2012, 05:08 PM   #34
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Hi Starr. I hope you don't beat yourself up about this? Take Stella's experience: it can take years to find a balance in your life. Sure it's tough for anyone, any gender, if you don't conform to what the movies and adverts idealize but in the end I just said "fuck 'em" . You only get one shot at life and there is so much to do - looks are superfluous. The people that really fuck me off are the ones that try to obstruct what I want to achieve because of my chromosomes: I mean WTF is that about?! Same thing goes for racial discrimination. I just don't get that either.
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Old 10-21-2012, 05:25 PM   #35
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Stickygirl,

Thanks for the morale booster. I think that being M2F and borderline TS makes me prone to the same kind of inferiority complex about physical beauty which afflicts genetic women.

Unlike a lot of the Sisters, I never came to grips with the truth about my gender dysphoria or my bisexuality until I was an adult, so I never had a childhood experience where I got my brains scrambled over some chromosomal issue. It was all much more subtle than that.

Looking back with the wisdom of hindsight, I can see now that, when I was a kid being attracted to movie stars and pinup girls, I was in many ways identifying with the women as much as I was desiring them. These thoughts were, of course, suppressed and sublimated because of the pressures of my male peers, my family, and society in general.







Quote:
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Hi Starr. I hope you don't beat yourself up about this? Take Stella's experience: it can take years to find a balance in your life. Sure it's tough for anyone, any gender, if you don't conform to what the movies and adverts idealize but in the end I just said "fuck 'em" . You only get one shot at life and there is so much to do - looks are superfluous. The people that really fuck me off are the ones that try to obstruct what I want to achieve because of my chromosomes: I mean WTF is that about?! Same thing goes for racial discrimination. I just don't get that either.
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Old 10-21-2012, 05:47 PM   #36
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Starr
I've spoken to a few people who's gender was pretty blurry and they couldn't decide where they stood, but that is a fantastic opportunity too, because they naturally have empathy for gender. But none of these choices are without compromise: there is no pot of gold to be claimed, it's just about making peace with yourself first, then seeing where to go from there. I used to worry that I still had sexual feelings towards women until a girl friend said "So what? I have those feelings too."
Sorry - don't know if this is really answering your points... I tend to ramble. I get marked down for it all the time
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Old 10-21-2012, 06:00 PM   #37
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I thought I would say.........

that this thread is remarkably beautiful and gentle in its truths.
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Old 10-21-2012, 11:19 PM   #38
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Originally Posted by Stella_Omega View Post
I'll come back to this, but there are two elements to my dysphoria; one is that all of my life I have woken up grabbing for the piss-hardon that isn't actually there. The visceral feeling of having a cock.
I feel like this, except the other way around! Constantly feeling like I should have a vagina and a clit, instead of this cock sticking out! Stella, I'll trade you anytime science finally perfects the procedure!

Quote:
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it's just about making peace with yourself first
God bless you on your journey, Starr, and listen to my sister sticky! She knows what she's talking about!

I think this peace within ourselves is something we're all trying to struggle with, and it makes it doubly difficult because we live in a world that is not entirely tolerant of us.
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Old 10-22-2012, 12:24 AM   #39
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Hehe! He is cute Arlan, I'll give you that!
Here's question for you and for everyone - including you TG lurkers out there!
What was you earliest memory of your dysphoria ( I'll save you the Google, dysphoria = Am I a girl or a boy or something else, WTF? )
Here's the first one I can recall, which would be looking through my Mum's dress-making patterns to find one for me. I had a plan I could short-stitch the whole thing together as I didn't know how to use a sewing machine. The whole plan got shot down in flames by my Mum who asked with her 'slightly shocked voice' "You're not trying to make a dress are you?"
Jeez - you know, writing that brings back all the same emotions. Up to that point I hadn't occurred to me that it was gender thing ( I just wanted a damned dress ) but, at that moment I realised: Owch! Boys don't make dresses do they? / Mum doesn't sound too happy / Eek! So I did the emergency back-out by replying with a voice stung by false accusation "No!" I still remember how I felt both embarrassed I'd been found out but also how annoyed I wasn't going to have a dress. Grrr! I suppose I was about 10 or 11yrs.

So! That's my truth or dare story: there are numerous others but I sure as hell ain't gonna put them down here!!! Who's next?
I have never really felt like either/or.
I knew that the body housed my inner most bits but it was never really important.
However, I knew that My body did not match my brain when I developed breasts...
that would have made me about 12.
Basically, I went from totally flat chested to a 38DD in about 3 months time. I hated them. I was jealous of the guys that I was friends with because they didn't have these massive growths and suddenly they all had way better balance than I did.
I spent a goodly amount of my teen years binding them away. Disgusted by them.
In my heart I was pissed at my mom for being so well endowed and passing the *blessing* on to me. I wanted to be built in the same way I felt.

Chest, not breasts.
Small hips.
Broad shoulders.

I wanted to be androgynous looking. To not be curvy and girly because it did not fit...ME.

The me inside is neither male nor female, it just is.
The me inside can be mistaken on any day for a guy.
The me on the inside is BOI...not boy.

SO yeah...dysphoria became real to me when I grew tits...and now at almost 40 years of age~

The me inside...still wants all these curves...gone.
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Old 10-22-2012, 12:41 AM   #40
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I have never really felt like either/or.
I knew that the body housed my inner most bits but it was never really important.
However, I knew that My body did not match my brain when I developed breasts...
that would have made me about 12.
Basically, I went from totally flat chested to a 38DD in about 3 months time. I hated them. I was jealous of the guys that I was friends with because they didn't have these massive growths and suddenly they all had way better balance than I did.
I spent a goodly amount of my teen years binding them away. Disgusted by them.
In my heart I was pissed at my mom for being so well endowed and passing the *blessing* on to me. I wanted to be built in the same way I felt.

Chest, not breasts.
Small hips.
Broad shoulders.

I wanted to be androgynous looking. To not be curvy and girly because it did not fit...ME.

The me inside is neither male nor female, it just is.
The me inside can be mistaken on any day for a guy.
The me on the inside is BOI...not boy.

SO yeah...dysphoria became real to me when I grew tits...and now at almost 40 years of age~

The me inside...still wants all these curves...gone.
I would love to see the real you.

Would you still be short? 'Cause I love short men...
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Old 10-22-2012, 12:56 AM   #41
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I would love to see the real you.

Would you still be short? 'Cause I love short men...
Do you know whenever I think on the Me inside...

I never imagine myself as tall nor overtly masculine.

Most of my muscles stay in the same places...

I just lose some extras that are not meant for Me.

So yes, you sexy beast, I would still be short. I would just be missing tits, all of these hips and some of my ass.

A random thought~because I have never wanted a penis...EVER...cept when it's cold and I gotta pee, out of doors~is it still dysphoric when what I really want is to look like Buck Angel?? Toned, cut, well developed build...with the cunning cleft left just the way it is??

I enjoy THAT part of my body...it's all the rest of it that causes me such pain.
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Old 10-22-2012, 01:16 AM   #42
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Luna_Wolf72 View Post
I have never really felt like either/or.
I knew that the body housed my inner most bits but it was never really important.
However, I knew that My body did not match my brain when I developed breasts...
that would have made me about 12.
Basically, I went from totally flat chested to a 38DD in about 3 months time. I hated them. I was jealous of the guys that I was friends with because they didn't have these massive growths and suddenly they all had way better balance than I did.
I spent a goodly amount of my teen years binding them away. Disgusted by them.
In my heart I was pissed at my mom for being so well endowed and passing the *blessing* on to me. I wanted to be built in the same way I felt.

Chest, not breasts.
Small hips.
Broad shoulders.

I wanted to be androgynous looking. To not be curvy and girly because it did not fit...ME.

The me inside is neither male nor female, it just is.
The me inside can be mistaken on any day for a guy.
The me on the inside is BOI...not boy.

SO yeah...dysphoria became real to me when I grew tits...and now at almost 40 years of age~

The me inside...still wants all these curves...gone.
For me, it was when I started growing hair on my legs, chest and arms, so right around 13/14 maybe? I remember shaving my legs for the longest time to try and postpone the inevitable. My dad is VERY hairy and masculine, so of course, I was blessed with his genes. I hated having a hairy body. I did what I could to try and keep a womanly appearance, but when you were my age at that point in time, you didn't want to walk around the locker room in middle school/high school looking like that. Times were waaaaay different. Everyone has a little bit of hair, but I have having to take an hour every other day to shave! Too much surface area!

Here's a question I have. Are there different...levels to being transgendered? What I mean is this. Take person A, who feels so strongly that they have to go through the process of physically aligning their bodies with their genders. Then take somebody like me. I know I'm a woman on the inside, but I'm not sure that I want to go forward with any sort of transitioning, aside from shaving my legs, etc., and wearing pretty clothes. Am I...less of a transgender, or not transgender at all? If I knew I could have a complete reassignment surgery with ZERO risk of complications, I'd do it in a heartbeat, but, I'm just too scared to start that process. That's what I struggle with, because I know in my heart and my soul, I'm a woman, but I'm not sure that I'm truly transgendered because I'm not transitioning.

Does that make any sense at all?
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Old 10-22-2012, 03:00 AM   #43
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This is turning into such a beautiful thread!
Stacy: people are wired to judge by appearance (you're the biologist!) it's a survival mechanism in the wild but the transgender label refers to what you feel inside and what you aspire to, not the process of how you deal with it. I'm sure there must be an analogy somewhere but perhaps someone else can chip in!?
We all have to throw off those ingrained values of society, because society judges: it judges in an instant and sentences for a lifetime. The human race has to move beyond that animal/survival reflex.
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Old 10-22-2012, 10:08 AM   #44
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I think this fits in here and is ok with the rules *crosses fingers*

I did post this in the old thread, but it was drowned immediately amongst the slightly more adult themed contributions.

Watching this just makes me smile for all kinds of reasons.

The way she moves, the huge huge smile, and needless to say... I would rather like to be able to sing like her into the whole deal.

I think this performance really sums up a lot of the wonderful external aspects of physical femininity that men are unable to achieve (I know some men are far more feminine than others, but I think even a lot that have spent years working at it, don't achieve it at this natural level).

I have probably not explained that all very well. I certainly don't have Stacy's ability to make sense of it all on the page.

Anyway... hope it fits ok!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aBmmf...eature=related
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Old 10-22-2012, 03:55 PM   #45
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Here's a question I have. Are there different...levels to being transgendered? What I mean is this. Take person A, who feels so strongly that they have to go through the process of physically aligning their bodies with their genders. Then take somebody like me. I know I'm a woman on the inside, but I'm not sure that I want to go forward with any sort of transitioning, aside from shaving my legs, etc., and wearing pretty clothes. Am I...less of a transgender, or not transgender at all? If I knew I could have a complete reassignment surgery with ZERO risk of complications, I'd do it in a heartbeat, but, I'm just too scared to start that process. That's what I struggle with, because I know in my heart and my soul, I'm a woman, but I'm not sure that I'm truly transgendered because I'm not transitioning.

Does that make any sense at all?
It makes perfect sense to me. I'm sure there are dozens, maybe even an infinite number, of different levels of being transgendered, but I'm using the term to mean everyone who has any sort of identification with the opposite gender. The Merriam Webster dictionary definition of transgender is merely a person who expresses a gender identity which is different from that of his/her birth gender.

I would describe a person in your level of the spectrum as a transsexual, which has as its primary meaning a person who has had SRS, and as its secondary meaning a person who identifies completely with the other gender and lives his/her life entirely as a member of the other gender. While I don't have any personal insight, it would seem to me that there must be many different reasons why people who identify themselves as women trapped inside a man's body choose to have or not have SRS.

I hope this doesn't come across as being didactic, since I'm really trying to comment on the incredible diversity in the TG community. Ordinarily, I hate using labels to pigeon hole any person, whether it has to do with race, gender, religion, nationality, et cetera.

I think the thing which is absolutely hateful in the community is when TG's start arguing amongst themselves about who is "pure" and who isn't. I get upset when the people who are going ahead with SRS get all uppity about people who have no intention to change and are comfortable with their genitals, and, on the other end of the spectrum, I get angry when the crossdressers who believe they are "100 % heterosexual" get all huffy about transgenders who are sexually active with men because it gives the CD community a bad public image.

I don't agree with Blanchard 100%, but I would identify as an autogynephiliac if I had to choose a label for myself under pain of death. However, under the dictionary definition, the hetero-oriented male person who merely likes to wear pantyhose and a skirt over his hairy legs is just as much transgendered as I am, or as a person who has had SRS. By the same token, if you feel like you are a woman, then I don't think that the transitioning surgery would make you any more "authentic" a transsexual. I don't even think that a transsexual has to live 24/7 as a woman if the period of not being feminine was due to economic or familial necessity.

As a heads-up, you might want to check out www.crossdressers.com, which is a G rated site for discussion of serious CD'ing and TS'ing issues. There are several different forums on the site, and one of them is specifically for transsexuals. I can't promise it, but I suspect that there is more than one person there who has feelings very similar to yours.

Sorry to be so verbose, but simplistic statements about complex subjects are part of the reason the world is so fucked-up.

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Old 10-22-2012, 04:43 PM   #46
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I really wish academics would take the sex out of transexual - people like Blanchard & Freund have taken the huge amount of raw data from the Kinsey report and thought they really ought to do something with it. Too much emphasis is placed on the sexual and fetish aspects of trangenderism. I for one do not wake up in the morning thinking about sex - its guys who do that! For me sex is about 20% of being TG - it's about being a woman and living a fulfilling life as a woman. Maybe that's just me? Is it just me?! Do write and say!

I may just be being a weenie bit cynical here but academic research has to be funded and headline-grabbing sex stories won the funding for Kinsey. Kinsey as a sex expert? That's like saying a heroin addict is an expert: not wrong, but not exactly true either huh?

Sorry Starr - I wasn't having a go at you at all! It's those academics that press all my buttons grrrr!
...and I'm no expert in that kind of research - just a lab-rat
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Old 10-22-2012, 04:49 PM   #47
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SissyKatie View Post
I think this fits in here and is ok with the rules *crosses fingers*

Anyway... hope it fits ok!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aBmmf...eature=related
Nice song, lovely figure, retro chic It fits fine Katie, and made me smile after my academic rant at the sky!
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Old 10-22-2012, 06:43 PM   #48
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stickygirl,

No offense taken, and I'm sure none was intended.

Regarding your comments about academic research, I think we need to distinguish between scientific research and exploitation of it. Most scientific research results can be manipulated by the media and/or commercial entities because the average lay person has no way to interpret the reports of any sort of learned research results in areas of specialized knowledge. The average person must rely on dumbed-down explanations of the "experts" who are hired by television news networks, or, even worse, on pseudo-scientific dramatic shows. Last night I watched a NOVA program which demonstrated that the infallibility of forensic science which is presented to the public weekly on programs like Bones, NCIS and CSI is a myth. It would make ineffective drama, would rob us of some very interesting female role models, and would cost the networks a ton of cash if Bones and Abby, e.g., were shown to be fallible human beings rather than laboratory whizzes who can solve crimes inside sixty minutes with just a bit of help from Brennan and Gibbs.

If we can't totally trust fingerprints, bite marks, footprints, tire treads, gun barrel metallurgy, and all of the other stuff that the FBI mistakenly foisted on us for the past few decades, why should we hold Kinsey or Blanchard to absolute standards?

Kinsey's reports on male and female sexuality were published a few years before and a few years after 1950, respectively. For that era, Kinsey was an astounding pioneer. Looking back with the wisdom of hindsight it's easy to criticize the methodology and results, but consider this interesting factoid: As late as 1956 the Hollywood censorship board refused to certify the innocuous movie "Blue Moon" for the sole reason that David Niven's character used the word "virgin."

Perhaps Kinsey became a self-promoting person on a quest for research funds later, but publicity had little to do with his earliest studies. Scientific research is always subject to scrutiny and criticism, but I'd much rather be a transgender alive in the here and now than in the days of censorship and repression, and Kinsey was a major factor in lifting those burdens from us.

As I said, I don't subscribe to Blanchard in toto, but that's not the same as disregarding his opinions. Although they might not fit congruently with any single individual's life experiences, they still contain some valuable insights. I must admit that while I have heard of Freund's studies, I have not read even a trustworthy summary of his work.

My point is that transgenderism encompasses a much wider spectrum than the small number of genetic males who identify as females. If a person's orientation is that she feels she is a woman and she wants to live a fulfilling life as a woman, and if attainment of that goal is a major focal point of her life, then she is a transsexual, which is a sub-category of transgender. If her attitude is that sex is only a part of her motivation then my observation would be that such a mindset is not atypical for the true transsexual. Gender identification and sexual orientation are related but separate facets of one's personality, and one can hate being a man and desperately want to be a woman without a sexual imperative as a component. It would seem to me the concept of SRS is aimed at mental well-being, not the ability to have sex as a female. Intellectually we all know that, unless we are splitting hairs over extremely rare genetic conditions, no transsexual will ever chromosomally ever be anything but the gender to which they were born, since there's always that tell-tale DNA strand to shout-out the truth.

The original concept of this thread was "I wish I was Her/Him," and that is my orientation. I want to be a beautiful woman, and if you believe Blanchard, then the impulse to have a male, and male sexual attentions, as the ultimate feminizing accessory is completely predictable for someone like me. I don't identify myself as a woman, my male genitalia don't bother me psychologically. On the other hand I don't identify myself as a manly man, either. but that has nothing at all to do with physicality, since I am lean, muscular, and not at all sissified. It's a mental/emotional thing. I cry at movies, I like shopping for clothes, I look at other women to admire (or deplore) their attire, I like wearing makeup and the kind of women's clothes which let me blend or pass, boxing matches horrify me, I'd go to an art show instead of an NFL game without a second's thought, etc.

I think we agree that whatever a person needs to do to reach self fulfillment, within the law and her budget, is what she should pursue. I just think that the use of labels such as transgender, transsexual, transvestite, crossdresser, and andorgynephiliac can be helpful in a general way, but that one shouldn't define oneself by their use. And my first post was intended, perhaps ineffectively, to bolster StacyTG's self-esteem when she was questioning whether she was "truly transgendered."

Anyway, gotta sign off. Have a good one!

Starr

Quote:
Originally Posted by stickygirl View Post
I really wish academics would take the sex out of transexual - people like Blanchard & Freund have taken the huge amount of raw data from the Kinsey report and thought they really ought to do something with it. Too much emphasis is placed on the sexual and fetish aspects of trangenderism. I for one do not wake up in the morning thinking about sex - its guys who do that! For me sex is about 20% of being TG - it's about being a woman and living a fulfilling life as a woman. Maybe that's just me? Is it just me?! Do write and say!

I may just be being a weenie bit cynical here but academic research has to be funded and headline-grabbing sex stories won the funding for Kinsey. Kinsey as a sex expert? That's like saying a heroin addict is an expert: not wrong, but not exactly true either huh?

Sorry Starr - I wasn't having a go at you at all! It's those academics that press all my buttons grrrr!
...and I'm no expert in that kind of research - just a lab-rat
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Old 10-22-2012, 07:23 PM   #49
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Thanks Starr - some interesting thoughts there and obviously you have looked into those reports far more than my woeful cursory skims. Maybe there's a language-culture thing behind my reaction because in the UK, we tend to frown on the use of the word transexual, because it suggests a sexual angle to the topic. Sure enough sex is just a word, but it comes loaded huh?
As for SRS, bear in mind it isn't just the surgery but the hormones that offer relief to so many of us and being rid of so many contrary male impulses is such a blessing, quite apart from the more obvious physical changes they produce. But yes, you're right, it is aimed at mental well-being.
Blanchard uses a category to describe MtF who seek a male partner as a homosexual transexual and I have to say I find that a very …unfortunate use of language. I can't help but feel that despite his extensive work he may have lost the plot or at least his perspective in that respect. But that's just my personal reaction.

But thank you so much for explaining your orientation: I've only ever heard vague references before so I found it really interesting. Hey - I'll go to that art show with you that next NFL game ( err… is that, what, a baseball team… God, sorry - I haven't the faintest )
Anyway, like all these other fab posts, I feel I'm learning so much about the rest of the community and that so valuable!
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Old 10-22-2012, 07:56 PM   #50
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Just found this on Tumblr. Wait for the last woman to speak up!

What would you do?
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