Can you help me make him cum?

[xxLadyJxx]

Hey guys,

I just can't seem to get my bf to cum with my mouth. I have made him cum with my hand and also during sex. And before you say that the problem may not be me, it is me. Other girls have made him cum from bj so it's all down to me IMO. It's really starting to affect my confidence which is actually quite low anyway.

My mouth is very small I feel and I can't fit a lot of him in. A lot of the time he lies there so quiet and I wonder if it feels good, I also can't help feeling that he's bored when I'm down there. I'll be honest and say that this is actually making me not want to do it even though I really want to make him cum with my mouth so bad.

We have talked about it and he says I slow down too much and he gets frustrated. The other night I was licking him and stopped for a second and he got frustrated and annoyed at me and then pushed me away when I tried to go back down there. It wasn't the fact that he got mad that hurt me, it was the fact that he pushed me away.

I love him with all my heart but this is really getting me down. I need some tips on how to get him to cum and how to stop myself being so scared to go down on him again after what happened. I know there are a million and one threads on oral sex but I felt like I needed to start my own.

Help.

[EroticApology]

Sounds like you might be stopping when he's really enjoying it. That is probably ruining his almost orgasm. If your mouth is getting tired then you need to know how to pace yourself. If you have no problem with making his orgasm with your hand then use your hand too. You might want to use your hand first...and when he's approaching orgasm then apply your mouth over the head but keep using your hand.

[xxLadyJxx]

That probably is what I'm doing. He's told me that he doesn't like it as much when I use my hand so I'm not sure what to do because I can't fit him all in.

This has been an issue for a while but since the other night I feel like I'm not enough.

[EroticApology]

Originally Posted by xxLadyJxx

That probably is what I'm doing. He's told me that he doesn't like it as much when I use my hand so I'm not sure what to do because I can't fit him all in.

This has been an issue for a while but since the other night I feel like I'm not enough.

If you can't fit him all the way in then don't try to fit him all the way in. Try to focus on what areas on his penis would turn him on more and then focus on those areas. Are you using enough saliva? Also, how does he like his oral...some men like it sloppy with lots of saliva and some men don't want that.

[xxLadyJxx]

Along with having a small mouth, I do feel he's quite big. He's about 7 inches erect I think. I'm always paranoid of gagging because it did happen a couple of times. I used to used my hand to try to combat this but he didn't like it. wouldn't say he likes it very sloppy but he does like a good bit of saliva.

It's always in my head that I won't make him cum and this is holding me back I think. I don't know how to stop this.

[EroticApology]

Originally Posted by xxLadyJxx

Along with having a small mouth, I do feel he's quite big. He's about 7 inches erect I think. I'm always paranoid of gagging because it did happen a couple of times. I used to used my hand to try to combat this but he didn't like it. wouldn't say he likes it very sloppy but he does like a good bit of saliva.

It's always in my head that I won't make him cum and this is holding me back I think. I don't know how to stop this.

The problem might be you are too concerned with the end result rather than enjoying yourself. I can honestly tell you the best way to approach oral sex is to do it with enjoyment. If you love it then you are doing it to pleasure yourself...and soon you will find he's being pleasured in the process. He has to help you too to relax...but do it because you want to and love it. Don't worry about making him cum...worry about how it feels good in your mouth and can't wait to have it in your mouth again.

[billrichards41]

Okay... come to nyc and practice on me. I won't push you away and I will let you know what works
Besides that use your hand and keep the head in your mouth, if doesn't like it I would say stop doing it and see how things go.
Sad if he doesn't appreciate your efforts.

[xxLadyJxx]

Originally Posted by EroticApology

The problem might be you are too concerned with the end result rather than enjoying yourself. I can honestly tell you the best way to approach oral sex is to do it with enjoyment. If you love it then you are doing it to pleasure yourself...and soon you will find he's being pleasured in the process. He has to help you too to relax...but do it because you want to and love it. Don't worry about making him cum...worry about how it feels good in your mouth and can't wait to have it in your mouth again.

Yes that's true actually. I am very hung up on the fact that he doesn't cum. I do enjoy it, I probable seem like I don't but I do. Or at least I try to. But this has become a hang up of mine and it makes me feel down about myself. It is my attitude I need to change.

Actually I should probably say that I was a virgin before I met him, I'd actually never even kissed anyone so he's my first everything - first kiss, first bj, he's the person who I gave my virginity to, etc.

[xxLadyJxx]

Originally Posted by billrichards41

Okay... come to nyc and practice on me. I won't push you away and I will let you know what works
Besides that use your hand and keep the head in your mouth, if doesn't like it I would say stop doing it and see how things go.
Sad if he doesn't appreciate your efforts.

He doesn't really like me using my hand tbh and I always keep the head in my mouth. I don't actually want to stop doing it because I do actually enjoy it. It's just lately I'm hung up on the end result.

[EroticApology]

Originally Posted by xxLadyJxx

Yes that's true actually. I am very hung up on the fact that he doesn't cum. I do enjoy it, I probable seem like I don't but I do. Or at least I try to. But this has become a hang up of mine and it makes me feel down about myself. It is my attitude I need to change.

Actually I should probably say that I was a virgin before I met him, I'd actually never even kissed anyone so he's my first everything - first kiss, first bj, he's the person who I gave my virginity to, etc.

If you were a virgin then he should be more understanding. You must approach oral with desire. If you do it only to please him then its a job...he can feel your insecurity and men get turned off by insecure women. Nothing is wrong with the size of your mouth...its all in the attitude. Think of yourself as a vixen...

[blksoldier]

Originally Posted by xxLadyJxx

Hey guys,

I just can't seem to get my bf to cum with my mouth. I have made him cum with my hand and also during sex. And before you say that the problem may not be me, it is me. Other girls have made him cum from bj so it's all down to me IMO. It's really starting to affect my confidence which is actually quite low anyway.

My mouth is very small I feel and I can't fit a lot of him in. A lot of the time he lies there so quiet and I wonder if it feels good, I also can't help feeling that he's bored when I'm down there. I'll be honest and say that this is actually making me not want to do it even though I really want to make him cum with my mouth so bad.

We have talked about it and he says I slow down too much and he gets frustrated. The other night I was licking him and stopped for a second and he got frustrated and annoyed at me and then pushed me away when I tried to go back down there. It wasn't the fact that he got mad that hurt me, it was the fact that he pushed me away.

I love him with all my heart but this is really getting me down. I need some tips on how to get him to cum and how to stop myself being so scared to go down on him again after what happened. I know there are a million and one threads on oral sex but I felt like I needed to start my own.

Help.

Being a man I can give you some tips stop concentrating on what's going wrong and keep doing the things that are going right. while you're stroking him take time to stroke his ego we men like that make him feel like its the biggest and best cock you ever had. moan ans make it wet very wet. tell me if it helps.

[xxLadyJxx]

Originally Posted by EroticApology

If you were a virgin then he should be more understanding. You must approach oral with desire. If you do it only to please him then its a job...he can feel your insecurity and men get turned off by insecure women. Nothing is wrong with the size of your mouth...its all in the attitude. Think of yourself as a vixen...

He is very understanding but this has been an issue for a while so I guess he's just frustrated and wants it to happen like I do. I do realise now that it's my attitude that's wrong.

[pmann]

Your boyfriend sounds like a douche. I know you love him, but the guy has a serious problem if he has a girl willing to blow him and he's being impatient.

DTMFA

[xxLadyJxx]

Originally Posted by pmann

Your boyfriend sounds like a douche. I know you love him, but the guy has a serious problem if he has a girl willing to blow him and he's being impatient.

DTMFA

Your opinion. He's far from a douche. You'd be getting impatient too if your gf of almost 2 years couldn't give you a blow job.

[pmann]

Originally Posted by xxLadyJxx

Your opinion. He's far from a douche. You'd be getting impatient too if your gf of almost 2 years couldn't give you a blow job.

It's my opinion based on what you've written so far. You seem really willing to please him. You said you stopped for a second and he got mad and pushed you away. That's douchie. He makes you feel insufficient (your claim). He doesn't want you to use your hand despite the fact that you have a small mouth. You blame yourself.

I think my assessment was bang on.

[xxLadyJxx]

Originally Posted by pmann

It's my opinion based on what you've written so far. You seem really willing to please him. You said you stopped for a second and he got mad and pushed you away. That's douchie. He makes you feel insufficient (your claim). He doesn't want you to use your hand despite the fact that you have a small mouth. You blame yourself.

I think my assessment was bang on.

It's not the first time I've slowed down/stopped. Your assessment is wrong.

[blulilacgrl]

Originally Posted by xxLadyJxx

Your opinion. He's far from a douche. You'd be getting impatient too if your gf of almost 2 years couldn't give you a blow job.

I'd be pissed at someone who couldn't be considerate enough to take the time to help. You're his girlfriend of 2 years and he cares this little for your feelings? In all these 2 years he hasn't sat down and said this is what I like. Or given you encouragement. His trick is to make you feel bad? Wow! winner.

No offense but you deserve more.

Moreover I'd be willing to bet he's never had a fantastic blowjob. He's had good blowjobs that due to a lack of experience must seem fantastic. But if he pushes your hands away then I really have to wonder...

But I will tell you this. Go do some research. There are 3-4 "hotspots" on the penis. They each take different moves and techniques, but each and every single one of them can lead to knee buckling and thigh trembling sensations. Although be warned 2 of them require your hands so.... good luck with that.

**edited to say it took me a little over a year to fully figure out my technique. And my hubby never complained of being my guinea pig. He now reaps the benefits even more as I love to give him blowjobs. So yeah, sorry, your boyfriend kinda pisses me off. **

[imemkay]

Originally Posted by xxLadyJxx

It's not the first time I've slowed down/stopped. Your assessment is wrong.

How long are you slowing down/stopping? Are you taking like a 30 minute break or just a minute to relax your jaw? When you stop, are you stopping all contact or are you at least still using your hand?

I think pmann's douche assessment is based partially on the fact that the guy actually pushed you away. I'm sorry, but that is douchie. You're making an effort, clearly trying to please him and that's his response? I'd of kicked in him the nuts!

[EroticApology]

Does he go down on you until you orgasm?

[pmann]

Originally Posted by xxLadyJxx

It's not the first time I've slowed down/stopped. Your assessment is wrong.

I don't care how shitty a blowjob it is. If you are blowing him and he pushes you away for anything other than biting his dick with vampire fangs, he's being rude.

Want to fix the bad blowjob problem? Get a nicer cock to suck.

Seriously, he's made you feel inferior. It's about trust and learning to work with someone to make the other person feel good.

You say my assessment is wrong. Why? What's wrong about it? What is not douchie about getting mad and pushing you away?

[EroticApology]

Originally Posted by pmann

I don't care how shitty a blowjob it is. If you are blowing him and he pushes you away for anything other than biting his dick with vampire fangs, he's being rude.

Want to fix the bad blowjob problem? Get a nicer cock to suck.

Seriously, he's made you feel inferior. It's about trust and learning to work with someone to make the other person feel good.

You say my assessment is wrong. Why? What's wrong about it? What is not douchie about getting mad and pushing you away?

PM...I think he could be a bit more understanding and patient with her. Its obvious she's not experienced. I'm curious if he's inexperienced as well.

[xxLadyJxx]

Originally Posted by pmann

I don't care how shitty a blowjob it is. If you are blowing him and he pushes you away for anything other than biting his dick with vampire fangs, he's being rude.

Want to fix the bad blowjob problem? Get a nicer cock to suck.

Seriously, he's made you feel inferior. It's about trust and learning to work with someone to make the other person feel good.

You say my assessment is wrong. Why? What's wrong about it? What is not douchie about getting mad and pushing you away?

I'd appreciate it if you'd actually try and help me instead of telling me to get a nice cock to suck.

He's apologised for that in case you didn't read my post.



No he isn't inexperienced.

Beginning to wonder why I bothered starting this thread.

[blulilacgrl]

Originally Posted by xxLadyJxx

I'd appreciate it if you'd actually try and help me instead of telling me to get a nice cock to suck.

He's apologised for that in case you didn't read my post.



No he isn't inexperienced.

Beginning to wonder why I bothered starting this thread.

Ummm... I just reread your posts and didn't see anywhere where you mentioned him apologizing.

And yes he is inexperienced if he thinks that frustration and guilt is the way to build up a lover's confidence.

[Sweetandsinful]

Originally Posted by blulilacgrl

There are 3-4 "hotspots" on the penis. They each take different moves and techniques, but each and every single one of them can lead to knee buckling and thigh trembling sensations. Although be warned 2 of them require your hands so.... good luck with that.

If you can recommend any particular place to do this research, it would be appreciated . I haven't had any complaints, but I'm always looking to improve.

[Bbb13]

One is right under the head