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Old 01-23-2018, 11:47 AM   #1
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Advice Thread

Free advice on almost any topic available here.

Guaranteed to be worth what you pay for it or double your funny back.
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Old 01-23-2018, 11:50 AM   #2
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Been pretty gassy lately and don't have a wife to give a dutch oven to. What can I do?
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Old 01-23-2018, 11:50 AM   #3
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How to attract real women to the GB?

Thanks.
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Old 01-23-2018, 11:52 AM   #4
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Been pretty gassy lately and don't have a wife to give a dutch oven to. What can I do?

A: Find a nice woman who will pull your finger.
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Old 01-23-2018, 11:53 AM   #5
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How to attract real women to the GB?

Thanks.

A: There are many beautiful women here posing as angry white men over 50. Try them; you'll be surprised!
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Old 01-23-2018, 12:04 PM   #6
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How to attract real women to the GB?

Thanks.
Leave.
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Old 01-23-2018, 12:12 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PollDancer View Post
A: There are many beautiful women here posing as angry white men over 50. Try them; you'll be surprised!
You wish.
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Old 01-23-2018, 12:12 PM   #8
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Leave.
IBID.
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Old 01-23-2018, 12:12 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PollDancer View Post
A: There are many beautiful women here posing as angry white men over 50. Try them; you'll be surprised!
Ken, your post is ironic.
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Those hard, hard women make an easy man out of me.

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Old 01-23-2018, 12:15 PM   #10
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IBID.
YAAI.
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Old 01-23-2018, 12:15 PM   #11
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I'm thinking of getting a new puppy..

Should I get the crunchy peanut butter or just the creamy stuff?
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48/m/married Midwest USA.. Just here to chat and friends. Anything else ask away...
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Old 01-23-2018, 12:23 PM   #12
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I'm thinking of getting a new puppy..

Should I get the crunchy peanut butter or just the creamy stuff?

A: Limiting licks to your guitars might be the safer move.
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Old 01-23-2018, 12:27 PM   #13
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A: Limiting licks to your guitars might be the safer move.

Impressive. I'm not that good. I'll just continue to play with myself.
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48/m/married Midwest USA.. Just here to chat and friends. Anything else ask away...
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Old 01-23-2018, 12:43 PM   #14
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Advice?

My advice is simple: Don't ask for advice on the General Board.
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Oggbashan's long list of stories
Jeanne D'Artois' few


electricblue66:
It's like [oggbashan] is writing for the third puffin over there by the sixth rock, when everyone else is an emperor penguin in the Antarctic, where there's tens of thousands of the bastards.
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Old 01-23-2018, 12:48 PM   #15
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Advice?

My advice is simple: Don't ask for advice on the General Board.
This thread will be the most Exceptional Exception to your otherwise sage post.
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Old 01-23-2018, 01:07 PM   #16
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Whatever anyone advises here, do the opposite. Or another opposite.

Visiting any visual attraction, turn around and take a picture in the opposite direction.

Listening to any vocalization, play it backwards and detect the backmasking.

Drive opposing the one-way arrows on your road. Once.

Contradiction for contradiction's sake -- that's the path to success.
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Old 01-24-2018, 10:12 AM   #17
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Open to answering your requests for advice.
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Old 01-24-2018, 10:19 AM   #18
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Open to answering your requests for advice.
I have a question. Why did Lance get ogg to post his lame goodbye to lit, never to return with a lame alt, only to return with several lame alts?
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Old 01-24-2018, 10:32 AM   #19
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I have a question. Why did Lance get ogg to post his lame goodbye to lit, never to return with a lame alt, only to return with several lame alts?
A: My advice in this would be to focus on yourself.
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Old 01-24-2018, 10:34 AM   #20
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^not a request for advice.

I can use some advice. Iím stuck in a situation that confuses me, consumes everything, exhausts me. I canít figure out the right thing to say or do. Iíve tried everything I can think of and nothing helps. What should I do?
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Old 01-24-2018, 11:00 AM   #21
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Nevermind saying or doing the right thing, sweet girl. How boring. I think you should make some really big, like monumentally huge, mistakes instead. Regrets make better stories.
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Old 01-24-2018, 11:03 AM   #22
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^not a request for advice.

I can use some advice. Iím stuck in a situation that confuses me, consumes everything, exhausts me. I canít figure out the right thing to say or do. Iíve tried everything I can think of and nothing helps. What should I do?
A1: Agreed.

A2: Put it aside and stop thinking about it. Revisit after engaging in something else for a while to check for fresh insights. Repeat as necessary.
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Old 01-24-2018, 11:08 AM   #23
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AlotLikePsyche View Post
^not a request for advice.

I can use some advice. Iím stuck in a situation that confuses me, consumes everything, exhausts me. I canít figure out the right thing to say or do. Iíve tried everything I can think of and nothing helps. What should I do?
Leave and seek out relationships that better fit your mental and physical ability to cope. We all enter into relationships with desires and expectations for the future. You have to decide how much of both you're willing to sacrifice in the pursuit of any long term relationship that would bring you to this particular point of frustration. There could be a lot of reasons why moving on might be difficult or impossible but maybe it's time to explore the possible.
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Old 01-24-2018, 11:10 AM   #24
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Old 01-24-2018, 11:19 AM   #25
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Why is BB such a

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Why is a carrot oranger than an orange?

< ~~~: Silently Enraged :~~~ >
No, I'm not OK.


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