Forsaken ~ Closed for Scuttle Buttin'

"Congratulations girls, you have just won two VIP tickets to Glastonbury music festival, with stage-side access for Forsaken Gods' headline set..."

The DJ was completely drowned out as Lara and her best friend Nikki screamed at the top of their lungs. The next thing they new, a long suffering producer was on the line asking for their details.

Lara raised a glass of vodka redbull and toasted their win. "I cannot fucking believe that!" She grinned. It was the first good thing that had happened to her in a very long time.

"Oh my God, what are we going to wear?" Nikki squealed. "This means shopping."

Lara gazed around her tiny bedsit with its battered furnishings and tried to remind herself that Nikki lived on a different planet, where she got an allowance that could be spent on luxuries.


Lara had been born to a heroin addicted prostitute. Her father could literally have been anybody. Before her first birthday she was on a child protection register and Michelle, her mother, was subject to regular visits. She kept her drug use and her 'profession' from the authorities until Lara was eight or nine and began seeing the truth of her surroundings and the various men who visited. More than one of them had tried to make moves on her when Michelle's back was turned or she was too drunk and high to care. The first time Lara stole cash from her mother she used it to buy a bolt for her bedroom door, which she fitted herself.

As she descended into more extreme drug abuse, Lara's mother became volatile and abusive, branding her brat nothing more than an ungrateful mouth to feed. Lara heard nothing but that she was scrawny, ugly, useless and worthless. Lara repressed her anger because her mother was always stronger and always prepared to use more force.

Finally, the day came when Lara was ten years old and she unlocked her bedroom door one morning to find her mother comatose on the sofa, overdosed. The paramedics took one look at the squalid apartment, the drugs, Lara's bruises and cigarette burns and called in social services. Lara never saw her mother again.

A malnourished, undersized, withdrawn and disturbed child, Lara had no hope of adoption. She languished in a kids home until they kicked her out at 18. Now she had a tiny bedsit, no qualifications, a tiny weekly benefits payment and the rest of her life to get together. Nikki was one of the few friends she had made at school, what with her ill fitting second hand uniforms and the fact she was a care kid. Nikki had two loving parents in a happy marriage, a good childhood and though she sympathised with Lara, there was so much that she just could not comprehend.

Lara remained a virgin despite everything, mainly because she hated men. She immersed herself in hard rock and metal music. Her goth fashion covered up the fact that she simply couldn't afford decent clothes. Much of her money went on booze and cigarettes, so her thin frame was partly the product of being malnourished and having no clue how to cook.

When she started listening to Forsaken Gods however, the music really spoke to her, crystallising her despair and rage, helping her channel it. Remy "Father" Vaughan's voice had an incredible range, whether he was howling into the mic or whispering insidiously into her ear. The only time Lara ever felt remotely interested in sex was when Father Vaughan growled filth into her ear through her MP3 player.

You let me violate you, you let me desecrate you
You let me penetrate you, you let me complicate you
Help me I broke apart my insides, help me I’ve got no soul to sell
Help me the only thing that works for me, help me get away from myself
I want to fuck you like an animal
I want to feel you from the inside
I want to fuck you like an animal
My whole existence is flawed
You get me closer to god​

It was his voice she called from memory when she masturbated, his dark eyes boring into her from his album cover that she held in her mind. Lara was obsessed. Surely this was a man who had suffered as she had, a kindred soul?


"What do you mean you're not going?" Lara was appalled. She thumped her coffee mug down on her tatty little table.

"I really want to go but there's no way my parents are going to let me. They're still mental about my belly piercing." Nikki's voice reached the sulky, teenaged pitch that always pissed Lara off. She lifted the bottom of her hoodie and felt the slightly raised skin where she had got her tattoo done, shredded skin from hipbone to ribcage. Nikki had chickened out of a tattoo and instead got her belly done, watching wide eyed as Lara's tummy was inked.

She's never known pain. Give her a break. Lara told herself for the millionth time.

She tried asking a couple of other people but in truth Lara had really wanted to go with Nikki, so in the end she went by herself. It suited her dark mood, to wander amongst thousands of people and feel totally alone. She hung out in the 'VIP' area, which basically had a more expensive bar and nicer toilets, where no VIP with an ounce of sense would be seen dead, because they had their own bar backstage. She swigged from a smuggled in vodka bottle and waited to be called up to go stage-side for Forsaken Gods' set.

Then, she was finally there, watching the band walk on stage and warm up, swigging from beercans and obviously loaded. Of course Vaughan came on last, once the other guys had started playing and everyone was screaming his name. Lara yelled herself hoarse, tiny nipples hardening inside her khaki bikini top as she raised her hands above her head and clapped along with everyone else. Vaughan was even taller than she had imagined, his lean, muscular body prowling the stage restlessly before snatching up his mic stand. She watched transfixed as Father Vaughan stared down the screaming crowd before launching into one of Lara's favourite songs, snarling the lyrics into his mic.

This world rejects me
This world threw me away
This world never gave me a chance
This world's gonna have to pay

I don't believe in your institutions
I did what you wanted me to
Like cancer in the system
I've got a little suprise for you

Something inside of me has opened up its eyes
Why did you put it there did you not realize
This thing inside of me it screams the loudest sound
Sometimes i think i could

Burn​

Lara felt her head spinning and her chest getting tight. Her face flushed and she had to grab the rail in front of her to stay upright. Hyperventilating... she was breathing too fast. A rush of wetness dumped itself into the gusset of her thong, shocking her. Her clit suddenly felt swollen, aching against the rough denim of her tight jeans. She took a deep breath and made herself sing along. If she fainted they would drag her away. It was the most aroused she had ever been in her life.

"REMY!"

Not 'the priest' or even 'Father Vaughan,' she had yelled his christian name, right when the music died down, building up slowly towards a crescendo. He might have glanced her way for a fraction of a second and it might even have been more than coincidence but Lara was totally overcome. She sobbed her way through the rest of the song and took a pull on the vodka bottle to try and steady her nerves some.