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How do I loosen my vagina?

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PrettyProse

Experienced
Joined
Feb 3, 2011
Posts
72
Seems like a strange question, I know...most guys like tight vaginas. And my husband is not an exception to that rule. But mine is ridiculously tight. It seriously feels like he's taking my virginity every time we have sex and it's painful for both of us if we have sex more than a few times a week. Which sucks because we both have very active sexual appetites. There's plenty of natural lubrication, so that isn't an issue. And we've used lube before but it's still rather painful. Condoms help him, but not me. Help please? D:

And yes, this is a serious inquiry. It may seem like a troll post, but it isn't. I'm at a loss here, I have no idea what to do. I've gone to my gynecologist and asked him about it and he says everything looks normal so...I have no idea where to turn. I figured you all might have some advice.
 
There are three allen-screw bolts recessed into the vaginal wall, about 2 1/2 inches in.

No, wait. That's for my water heater flow valve. I'll have to get back to you.
 
I had the same problem, and I can honestly tell you that it does get better.

What did the trick for me was regular practice with a dilator. A dilator looks kind of like a small vibrator or dildo that has graduated parts so you can use increasingly larger sizes. Use this with plenty of lubrication (don't rely on natural lubricant - use an artificial one). Go slowly and give it a few weeks and see if it works for you.

The dilator I use (yes, I still use it to keep things in order) is Dr. Laura Berman's set (http://www.amazon.com/Berman-Center-SE-9711-14-3-Dilator/dp/B00121B0H8) and I use a silicone based lube with it like Astroglide X (http://www.amazon.com/Premium-Silic...ef=sr_1_1?s=hpc&ie=UTF8&qid=1327489536&sr=1-1) . There are many different places to buy either / both, I just tried to provide Amazon links since they're generally safe.

Best of luck!!!
 
Stop using it.

Use it or lose it applies to that area as well...it's a muscle thing.




Now, if you'll excuse me, I gotta grab a paper towel and wipe up my Coke I spewed all over my keyboard when I saw this thread title! :D
 
It came out my nose.

I can understand the issue of it being painful but other than that, I was astonished any female would ever ask a question like this so had to come see why! :D
 
Gradual dilation is definitely something to try, but I'd also recommend getting a second opinion from a female sexual health specialist. If you're in WA, check out the Virginia Mason Sexual Health Clinic in Seattle. Last year, I saw a doctor there who was able to diagnose my condition very quickly, even though my OBGYN had blown it off as normal multiple times. The VM doc said even great gynecologists frequently misdiagnose or ignore conditions that cause pain with intercourse and other sexual issues.
 
I'm glad you got some good responses. This is a very hard thread to resist cracking jokes so that's all I'm going to say.
 
PrettyProse said:
Seems like a strange question, I know...most guys like tight vaginas. And my husband is not an exception to that rule. But mine is ridiculously tight. It seriously feels like he's taking my virginity every time we have sex and it's painful for both of us if we have sex more than a few times a week. Which sucks because we both have very active sexual appetites. There's plenty of natural lubrication, so that isn't an issue. And we've used lube before but it's still rather painful. Condoms help him, but not me. Help please? D:

And yes, this is a serious inquiry. It may seem like a troll post, but it isn't. I'm at a loss here, I have no idea what to do. I've gone to my gynecologist and asked him about it and he says everything looks normal so...I have no idea where to turn. I figured you all might have some advice.
Click to expand...
That sounds like such a drag. I'm sorry that you're having so much pain. I agree with the dilator idea. I don't like that your doctor sort of blew it off. At the risk of sounding sexist, if I were you I'd try to find a female doctor. I think there might be another layer of compassion/understanding from a woman. Perhaps the idea of a tight vagina being a problem to a man is an oxymoron? Good luck. Hope it gets better.
 
PrettyProse said:
I have no idea where to turn. I figured you all might have some advice.
Click to expand...

Go start having lots of sex with everyone you can. That's what ended up working for my wife. If you're not sure where to start, PM me... I can hook up a one man train for you if you're cute. ;)
 
The answer is very simple. Use a vaginal dilator kit.

Dr. Berman's Dilator Kit has the added advantage of being a vibrator. You can order the kit from Walgreen's drug store website: walgreens.com. Just click on "Sexual Wellness".
 
I have a similar problem. Recently lost a tampon up there and my own doctor was asking me if I was a virgin. That was embarrassing.

A slut friend told me to try using the super sized/biggest tampons..forgot what brand..during my period to help stretch it out because some brands say best for women who have given birth.. but that didn't do anything whatsoever.
 
My experience

my ex wife was very tight when we first met, I was young and frustated and managed to 'break' my penis once when we tried to get it inside her, and god that was painful.

What worked for us was a lot of foreplay. lots of licking and fingering to arouse and relacx her beforee we even attempted entry.
It didn't always work but over a year we got to where we needed to be.

And some memories are still amazing, she suddenly came so hard once that I came with her without even being touched.

As she started to loosen up we would find that she would orgasm being touched or licked and then couldn't stand being touched again. She was exhausted and sated and I was left stiff as a board. At first I used to wait for her to fall asleep then jerk off but she realised what I was doing and insisted on returning the favour, That was actually very bonding.

Soon we got a routine which worked for us it was hard work and frustrating a lot at times but so much fun as well. keep at it and you'll get what you need.
I never thought about a Dilator and it still seems impersonal to me when evolution / God gave us different sized digits lol.
 
Now this is a problem I'd like to help with :D

PrettyProse said:
Seems like a strange question, I know...most guys like tight vaginas. And my husband is not an exception to that rule. But mine is ridiculously tight. It seriously feels like he's taking my virginity every time we have sex and it's painful for both of us if we have sex more than a few times a week. Which sucks because we both have very active sexual appetites. There's plenty of natural lubrication, so that isn't an issue. And we've used lube before but it's still rather painful. Condoms help him, but not me. Help please? D:

And yes, this is a serious inquiry. It may seem like a troll post, but it isn't. I'm at a loss here, I have no idea what to do. I've gone to my gynecologist and asked him about it and he says everything looks normal so...I have no idea where to turn. I figured you all might have some advice.
Click to expand...
 
subwannabe said:
I'm glad you got some good responses. This is a very hard thread to resist cracking jokes so that's all I'm going to say.
Click to expand...

Seriously, I know right :rolleyes:

It's taken an incredible amount of self control to keep from offering my services to the poor girl, one night should do that trick:rose::devil::rose:
 
Ask your ob/gyn for a referral for obstetrics and gynecology physical therapy for women.
 
Thank you!

Thank you all for your replies! :D (And yes, even the funny ones. Made me giggle.)

I'll have to try the dilator kit because my husband's going off to Basic Training for the Army soon and then straight to AIT. Without much..ahem...use, I'll have to make sure he doesn't tear me apart when he gets back. (Although, that might be an interesting experience and fine if we just wanted to have sex once, that probably won't be the case.)

I've already taken some of the advice and tried relaxing the muscles down there. I subconsciously clench them most of the time. And then the lots-of-foreplay-to-get-things-better-relaxed advice, I have not had an issue with! XD
 
PrettyProse said:
Thank you all for your replies! :D (And yes, even the funny ones. Made me giggle.)

I'll have to try the dilator kit because my husband's going off to Basic Training for the Army soon and then straight to AIT. Without much..ahem...use, I'll have to make sure he doesn't tear me apart when he gets back. (Although, that might be an interesting experience and fine if we just wanted to have sex once, that probably won't be the case.)

I've already taken some of the advice and tried relaxing the muscles down there. I subconsciously clench them most of the time. And then the lots-of-foreplay-to-get-things-better-relaxed advice, I have not had an issue with! XD
Click to expand...
This may sound strange but Kegels might help in addition to the other advice. It will help you get better muscle control so you are more aware of when you are clenching and get better at unclenching so to speak.
 
Dr. Berman's Vaginal Dilator Kit

This will work wonders if you use it faithfully twice a day. It has the added advantage of being a vibrator too. Use Astroglide with it and I slip a condom onto the shaft to minimize clean up time with it.

A couple of months and you will only need it to use as a vibrator.

Order the kit from Walgreen's online.
 
PrettyProse said:
Seems like a strange question, I know...most guys like tight vaginas. And my husband is not an exception to that rule. But mine is ridiculously tight. It seriously feels like he's taking my virginity every time we have sex and it's painful for both of us if we have sex more than a few times a week. Which sucks because we both have very active sexual appetites. There's plenty of natural lubrication, so that isn't an issue. And we've used lube before but it's still rather painful. Condoms help him, but not me. Help please? D:

And yes, this is a serious inquiry. It may seem like a troll post, but it isn't. I'm at a loss here, I have no idea what to do. I've gone to my gynecologist and asked him about it and he says everything looks normal so...I have no idea where to turn. I figured you all might have some advice.
Click to expand...

I'm glad you asked this question, I was just writing up a similar question about this issue to post so I can get some help. Vaginal penetration is extremely difficult for me but my gyno told me structurally I don't have any issues. I never heard of a dilator before, so I think I will get one.
 
My first wife suffered from vaginismus, which is a painful contraction of the muscles when physical contact occurs (ie, penis trying to get in). It can be fixed, but it was a contributing factor in ending our marriage. I'd find a good female doctor and have a good talk about it. Don't let this drag on.
 
PleasePeesMe said:
My first wife suffered from vaginismus, which is a painful contraction of the muscles when physical contact occurs (ie, penis trying to get in). It can be fixed, but it was a contributing factor in ending our marriage. I'd find a good female doctor and have a good talk about it. Don't let this drag on.
Click to expand...

fixed like she stopped having pain at all or fixed like it got bareable enough to have sex? I just ordered the dilator thing . . . I hope it works.
 
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