Advice: Orgasm Denial - Teasing Her Until She Can't Take It....

Hi there people....

I wanted to post here to get some opinions.... I should probably first explain that I'm a guy and love the idea of orgasm denial, (both having it done to me and the idea of getting a woman stupidly horny with plenty of foreplay - followed by slowly licking her clit & pussy to edge of orgasm, only to pull away before she can cum) - it never fails to get me extremely turned-on!

I've never actually had it done to me, but have done it to a lady on a few occassions. I usually like to have her tied to the bed, and sometime for her to be blindfolded.

Both the women I've tried this on really did seem to love it, although they hadn't really tried any BDSM previously.

My first question therefore is: Obviously all women (and indeed people) are different, but is this something that you feel that most women would enjoy? Or would this just plain annoy some/a-lot of women?

Another question I have is; Is there such a thing as too much denial? I just adore doing it over & over - and to be perfectly honest also enjoy a laughing a little when she's in a state where she begins to beg me etc.

I also enjoy (after having teased her for ages taking her close over & over), followed by telling her that I'll let her 'come this time babes', only this is often a lie, as I like her to think she's going to orgasm 'this time', only for me to deny her again.

I always let her cum - eventually, but love taking hours end before making her cum for me.

I'd love to hear from any ladies here that love having this done to them, even if it drives them mad. It'd also be great to hear what drives them particularly wild, in terms of what there partner does to them. Indeed, any guys who enjoy doing this - I'd also love to find out what you do that drives her crazy.


For instance, I often enjoy licking and sucking her clit until she gets real real close, only to change to tongue-fucking her pussy - or perhaps licking across her ass, as this seems to particularly maker her really really desperate to cum... Although, doing this (or playing with her nipples) can cause her to orgasm - so tend to do this very gently, then stopping for a minute or two - until she settles down so I can begin again - very slowly.

Any tips or advice would be much appreciated - thanks...

I've had guys do this to me to the point where I get really pissed off and sometimes a little turned off... although when I get pissed off the attitude is usually "Ugh just fuck me already" so maybe that's the point?

Sangsuesub said:

I've had guys do this to me to the point where I get really pissed off and sometimes a little turned off... although when I get pissed off the attitude is usually "Ugh just fuck me already" so maybe that's the point?

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Hey there 'Sangsuesub', thanks for posting. I wondered if that'd be the case for some. If you don't mind me asking; how would you feel if after being brought close to cumming, you were spanked instead - and perhaps alternating between the two - orgasm denial & spanking.

I've always wondered what this would do to someone who's realling into having their ass spanked (as you appear to be). I guess this might run the risk of making you orgasm when spanked?

Ooo spanking!

I think alternating denial and spanking would be hot/frustrating. I've had a dom make me masturbate and when it wasn't going fast enough for him he started spanking me, which definitely sped things along. Admittedly I haven't had a lot of experience with denial, at least to the extent that you describe, but I think the spanking combo sounds promising.

tease2pleaseu said:

I always let her cum - eventually, but love taking hours end before making her cum for me.

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Me, you would lose after about 30 minutes.
I get pissed off too but not in a good way. I would probably kick you out of the bed.

StrayKat said:

Me, you would lose after about 30 minutes.
I get pissed off too but not in a good way. I would probably kick you out of the bed.

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I get punchy. *nods*

Sangsuesub said:

Ooo spanking!

I think alternating denial and spanking would be hot/frustrating. I've had a dom make me masturbate and when it wasn't going fast enough for him he started spanking me, which definitely sped things along. Admittedly I haven't had a lot of experience with denial, at least to the extent that you describe, but I think the spanking combo sounds promising.

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Yeah, definitely seems some experimenting between spanking and denial is warranted! Certainly the thought of it certainly seems hot enough. Thanks for your thoughts Sangsuesub - after all experimenting is half the fun (at least)!

StrayKat said:

Me, you would lose after about 30 minutes.
I get pissed off too but not in a good way. I would probably kick you out of the bed.

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Hi StrayKat,

perhaps this idea isn't as popular as I thought it might be, thanks for posting.. I guess just teasing slowly all the way to orgasm perhaps better for some women?

Not sure how feel about being spanked, if so, and of course if you don't mind me asking - how about your thoughts on alternating between bringing you close to orgasm and then switching to being spanked for a while?

Thanks for posting.

Lizzie_Borden said:

I get punchy. *nods*

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Hi Lizzie, as I mentioned this is proving to be less popular than I anticipated, thanks for your thoughts.... Although I have to ask you the same question, of course (if I may).... Would it do more for you if you were brought really close followed by having your ass spanked?

Although it sounds as if this is isn't something you'd enjoy (being denied over & over), how about once or twice before orgasm - is this something you'd be more receptive to?

Or would you prefer being being teased slowly to orgasm? I'd be interested to find out....

Thanks for posting.

tease2pleaseu said:

Hi StrayKat,

perhaps this idea isn't as popular as I thought it might be, thanks for posting.. I guess just teasing slowly all the way to orgasm perhaps better for some women?

Not sure how feel about being spanked, if so, and of course if you don't mind me asking - how about your thoughts on alternating between bringing you close to orgasm and then switching to being spanked for a while?

Thanks for posting.

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I know if I delay the orgasm too long I get extremely pissed off and lose interest. It takes me a while to cool off then. When I am angry I am not interested in any form of sex apart from kicking someones balls repeatedly.

As far as spanking goes, no experience with that.
Considering my mood right now I would rather spank you though.

StrayKat said:

I know if I delay the orgasm too long I get extremely pissed off and lose interest. It takes me a while to cool off then. When I am angry I am not interested in any form of sex apart from kicking someones balls repeatedly.

As far as spanking goes, no experience with that.
The way my mood is right now I would rather spank you though.

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To be perfectly honest, I've never had that done to me, at least not properly - although I definitely wouldn't be adverse to experimenting with that either!

Although, I'm sure if you want to spank me just because the idea of my post pissed you off, lol...

Either way, sounds like it's something you enjoy - giving a guy a good spanking!

tease2pleaseu said:

Although, I'm sure if you want to spank me just because the idea of my post pissed you off, lol...

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Not at all.
Me being moody has nothing to do with you.

StrayKat said:

Not at all.
Me being moody has nothing to do with you.

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Good, glad it wasn't me ... Anyway, who knows - receiving a good spanking, or being bossed around a little (by the right guy) might be just what you need in order to get you in a better mood!

Just sayin...

tease2pleaseu said:

Good, glad it wasn't me ... Anyway, who knows - receiving a good spanking, or being bossed around a little (by the right guy) might be just what you need in order to get you in a better mood!

Just sayin...

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Or maybe not - sorry hun that was a little forward - no offence intended.

I think it's all the talk of tying, teasing and spanking - got me a little carried away...

Well tease its a double edge sword if you find a lady that likes it. If you get a hold of one that doesn't your in for a world of hurt. It you find one that does you have to be very cautious you don't deny them to long or to many times. If you do it right you will be greatly rewarded but if you deny to long or to many times well its gonna get very nasty and ugly fast. Denying a orgasm to long or to many times can actually turn a woman of for hours to much more extended periods of time. You have to learn to read them and best thing to do is talk to your partner about it before you try it or just keep it to one or two denyals. Good rule if it takes a long time to get them there don't push your luck with the denying them.

For me the big thing is having control over her orgasm. I don't like to tease her for too long because I just start feeling cruel.

Denying an orgasm or forcing an orgasm gives me pretty much the same satisfaction. I think it's possibly the demonstration of control that's the thing.
Knowing she can't cum without me is enough for me.

I don't think I have ever teased her for more than about 10 minutes. Maybe I just like making her cum too much.

tease2pleaseu said:

Hi Lizzie, as I mentioned this is proving to be less popular than I anticipated, thanks for your thoughts.... Although I have to ask you the same question, of course (if I may).... Would it do more for you if you were brought really close followed by having your ass spanked?

Although it sounds as if this is isn't something you'd enjoy (being denied over & over), how about once or twice before orgasm - is this something you'd be more receptive to?

Or would you prefer being being teased slowly to orgasm? I'd be interested to find out....

Thanks for posting.

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No, that would just confuse me. I tend to like to keep my sex and pain as separate adventures.

I can handle being denied once or twice, as part of a build up. Much more than that though, and I'll go over the edge, but in a most unsatisfactory way. That gets me riled up in bad ways, I get very frustrated and very stroppy. :S

I'm going to chime in and say that, while a little bit of denial is fun, if you keep it up then I'm just going to get pissed. If you were dangling a treat in front of a dog (lets say it was a sensible dog, not something food-psychotic like a labrador), and you constantly jerked it away, the dog is eventually going to just walk away, or bite you.

And no, being spanked during this would not help. It'd probably only compound my anger.

This is where negotiation comes in, and also being very attentive to your partner...

If you're doing this with someone new, you should probably keep the first session short. Afterwards, let her tell you if she thinks she likes it enough to go for more cycles.

Personally. I can sometimes edge myself, masturbating, but my orgasm is a little iffy with partners. If I feel it go away, it probably won't come back again.

My wife gets pissed off if I tease and deny her for more than a half hour - it makes it harder for her to orgasm, and unlike me who likes to be denied, she likes cumming every time.

Personally I have to say where have u been all my life

My biggest fantasy is to be tied up and blindfolded. Then teased and brought to to the edge repeatedly. I also love love love being teased with a feather. The feeling is like nothing else. Of course a tongue would be good too. But I know be teased, tantalized and tormented is my dream. My husband has gotten pretty good at it without the blindfold and being tied up. I just think that being tied up and having a blindfold on would heighten the experience. If you like this thought we can talk about it some more if u like pm me. Dreamykitten2

johnnysmathers said:

My wife gets pissed off if I tease and deny her for more than a half hour - it makes it harder for her to orgasm, and unlike me who likes to be denied, she likes cumming every time.

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I'm with your wife. If I don't cum during a masturbation session, I have to re-negotiate with myself the next time before I let myself do that again.

Wow, I guess I'm in the minority here. I think being teased for hours sounds incredibly hot.

I would go absolutely NUTS for a guy that would tie me up and deny me for atleast an hour! Depending on the lover, getting me over the edge can be quick and easy or long and drawn out.....I've even faked it after a while with some when I knew I wasn't really going to get off so I could go do it myself ; )

There was one time that a guy tried denial with me that was really great, he would get me to that edge then slap me in the face and drag his finger nails over my legs and play with my nipples for a while. After I settled down, he would keep me tied and fuck my mouth until he got to the edge, then he would turn his attention back to me and cycle through like that for an hour or more. By the time he gave his permission I was thrashing around, writhing, and begging for it so violently that my voice was going hoarse lol!

As for teasing, I LOVE having my nipples played with for long periods of time, progressing to fingering and then some ass play and FINIALLY his mouth which ALWAYS gets me into trouble because sometimes he would make it my responsibility to remain still and relaxed while he played with me. This is UTTER TORTURE because everytime I would tense up, wiggle, or buck he would add an extra cycle into my denial or spanking depending on how long it took to get myself back under control and how powerfully I disobeyed him......now THAT was really good : )

I guess everyone is different. All of the women I have been associated with always get to a point where it is all downhill from there. In other words, I could only tease them for so long before it starts backfiring.