Pick your number please

StrayKat · 12-10-2011, 05:32 PM

I am very happy to be back on Lit after 3 years, but my prolonged absence somewhat hindered my ability to deal with my rapidly filling inbox.

Therefore, until I get back in shape, I decided to set up a small recording machine to make it possible to answer everyone as soon as I can, as you all so well deserve.

So there goes *beep*

- For telling me to get on my knees like a cocksucking bitch I am - press 1
- For telling me to get on my knees like a cocksucking bitch I am but coming back with "Ok Ma'am then I will get down on mine" if I answer with "No way in hell" on your first offer - press 2
- For inquries about color and size of my underwear - press 3
- For stories about your sexually repressed wife and reasons why should I tell you all my fantasies so you can apply them to your marriage, because woman is a woman after all - press 4
- For telling me for the 23rd time we are a perfect match even though I said "No thank you" and stopped answering around your 2nd message - press 5
- For sending me a 2 pages filled with incoherent and illiterate porn story full of cliches (I promise not to steal your work of art and publish it under my name) - press 6
- For one-liners without capitals and punctuations with 7 spelling mistakes in 3 words - press 7
- For questionnaire about my childhood, favorite pets, cooking and eating habits, dressing preferences and wet dreams after which, if I answer, you will never send me another message again - press 8
- For asking if I want to log on Yahoo and see you wanking on cam, after I specifically told you I genuinely hate Instant Messengers and have none installed on my PC - press 9
- For all your assumptions about my needs, wants and fantasies, both conscious and unconscious, based on my profile picture or my avatar - press 0

Thank you for your cooperation and have a nice day

e2-e4 · 12-10-2011, 05:34 PM

you better have some good hold music

daringleis · 12-10-2011, 05:36 PM

LMFAO. This is some of the funniest sh*t I've seen on here in a while. Thanks for the afternoon laugh

.

thickdick016 · 12-10-2011, 05:49 PM

8 but we will message back
Crystal n Kevin

creamofthecrawp · 12-10-2011, 05:56 PM

but you never said if i should read carefully as menu options may have changed!

NoWon01 · 12-10-2011, 06:05 PM

"Representative" ... damit I hate these automated phone trees

niv78 · 12-10-2011, 07:35 PM

I'm pressing # for phone sex.

Kudram123 · 12-10-2011, 07:52 PM

What number do I press to speak to an opperator?

I'd like to leave a message saying this has made me grin ear to ear!
I look forward to seeing more of you round the forums!

Dph6187 · 12-10-2011, 07:52 PM

three

StrayKat · 12-11-2011, 03:32 AM

Oh cammon guys, 9 is getting ahead and hardly any 1s...
Wtf happened to the Lit I used to know?

BKD140 · 12-11-2011, 03:42 AM

A very detailed Three please

And I'd be more than happy to give you 'One'

StrayKat · 12-11-2011, 04:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kudram123

What number do I press to speak to an opperator?

Just leave a note you have "gaming" as first listed in your interests.... operator will get back to you asap

avery11 · 12-11-2011, 05:15 AM

your soooo sweet I could eat you

1, 2, 0

LMFAO

NeonSubtlety · 12-11-2011, 05:20 AM

sveen me butiful

StrayKat · 12-11-2011, 05:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NeonSubtlety

sveen me butiful

Should I add a Lolwut

number?

ganner · 12-11-2011, 05:40 AM

Presses * for help...

I would opt though for a gaming mention if the rumors were true!

nwnnguy · 12-11-2011, 06:03 AM

[pressing random digits till someone answers the phone]

StrayKat · 12-11-2011, 07:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ganner

I would opt though for a gaming mention if the rumors were true!

Definitely adds a + to your number

pairodoxxx · 12-11-2011, 07:36 AM

Do I need to press * to listen again?

ravi64 · 12-11-2011, 07:38 AM

What do i press to speak to an operator

Shadoweyes · 12-11-2011, 09:08 AM

"presses 1, calls back presses 2 and calls back again and presses 3"

StrayKat · 12-11-2011, 09:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shadoweyes

"presses 1, calls back presses 2 and calls back again and presses 3"

Keep going, almost there

BeEfToFu · 12-11-2011, 09:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nwnnguy

[pressing random digits till someone answers the phone]

I'm unsure this would work if ALL the numbers correlate to something as it may just take the first tone press. You may just receive the, "your fingers are too fat.." message a la The Simpsons.

Alternatively, usually waiting long enough or repeatedly hitting hash may result in an operator.

Shadoweyes · 12-11-2011, 09:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by StrayKat

Keep going, almost there

No those three are enough thanks! Anything more would be more then I care for.

Kudram123 · 12-11-2011, 11:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by StrayKat

Just leave a note you have "gaming" as first listed in your interests.... operator will get back to you asap

Haha, bit of a gaming addict yourself too éh?

What games do you get into then?

Or are you more a community gal?
For me, any game with friends is fun.