is it possible to find a real relationship

[bird154]

I live in Atl, am a African American submissive female and am into this kink...is it possible to find a real relationship in this lifestyle?

[midwestyankee]

Originally Posted by bird154

I live in Atl, am a African American submissive female and am into this kink...is it possible to find a real relationship in this lifestyle?

Of course it is, depending on what you mean by "real" above. What makes you question whether this is possible?

[Loverskitten]

Originally Posted by bird154

I live in Atl, am a African American submissive female and am into this kink...is it possible to find a real relationship in this lifestyle?

I don't see how "African American" factors in here, there are Dominant and submissive types in all ethnicities. It's finding the right partner for you that is the hard part.

[Loverskitten]

Join Fetlife and look for kink communities in your area. I've heard Atlanta has a large, active community.

[VladHarkonnen]

Maybe it does factor in.

Bird, when you say "this kink" are you referring to some sort of race play? I could see that narrowing your choices a little but not eliminating them.

[Sir_Winston54]

Originally Posted by bird154

I live in Atl, am a African American submissive female and am into this kink...is it possible to find a real relationship in this lifestyle?

To answer your initial question directly: Yes.

Good luck to you, and welcome to BDSM Talk and the BDSM Café. There are many folks who hang in this forum and discuss BDSM-related topics, issues and questions (Talk) on a pretty constant basis, and wander over here into the Café to discuss just about anything, sometimes from a BDSM view, sometimes from the point of view of practicing/interested BDSMers, and sometimes just from our own warped sense of humor.

If you have questions/concerns/issues about BDSM culture, Talk is a great place to get some very considered, very experienced, and very thoughtful responses (as well as the occasional snark, because very few of us have no sense of humor at all, lol!). Many of our "regular" posters have been involved in BDSM for years and years, and many for decades, and while their experiences may not relate *directly* to your questions or issues, the posters there are generally doing their best to be honest, direct and helpful.

Another resource you might find helpful and informative in finding out more about the possibilities of both the BDSM culture and relationships in it in the "real world" is Fetlife.com (sign-up page). It's free and pretty much worldwide. The current status page lists "41,929 Kinksters living in Georgia," and shows "130 Upcoming events in Georgia" on the Georgia page.

ETA: Vlad's response to Loverskitten's question is valid, as well. It may be a factor in making your quest a *little* more difficult to resolve, but not by any means impossible. I've seen many interracial BDSM relationships in my 40+ years of doing this thing, from M/f to F/m in either race, to multiples of one or both genders and multiples of one or multiple races (poly relationships). Few of them who took the time to learn about each other had any noticeably higher "failure" rate than I've seen of heterogeneous racial relationships.

[bird154]

Originally Posted by midwestyankee

Of course it is, depending on what you mean by "real" above. What makes you question whether this is possible?

Thank you all for your responses...I indicate AA because if anyone is looking who sees this I want them to know what ethnicity I am...I ask about real because I have met alot of men who play at this or that but dont seem to have any genuiness...and I will go to fet, thank you again,
Peace

[midwestyankee]

Originally Posted by bird154

Thank you all for your responses...I indicate AA because if anyone is looking who sees this I want them to know what ethnicity I am...I ask about real because I have met alot of men who play at this or that but dont seem to have any genuiness...and I will go to fet, thank you again,
Peace

I'm glad you got some help here. So do check out the many discussions and groups at Fet as well as the happenings in and around home.

But also come back here and join in the conversation here. These two sites are a little different and we like to think that we're a pretty friendly bunch around here.

[query]

Looking at the thread title I wasn't even considering even though I was in a sub-fora the subtext of her question.

I dunno..... it seems like the possibility of realistically seeking any sort of in depth relationship As classically defined whether formalized through marriage or not seems a fleeting pursuit to me.

Now granted I haven't actively pursued such a thing and or given much thought as the how one would do that but just people in general observing anecdotally relationships; ones that I think have got a shot don't seem to make it 3 or 4 months these days.

Course I live in a town with a highly skewed gender differential.

To the OP's question though I would think that somebody with dominant tendencies has no more or less likelihood of being good relationship material.

I do think that though there anything that narrows the field of potential candidates that are compatible with your needs and desires obviously makes the search tougher.... I would think that in your case the object would be to get out there and find men who suck eggs if it dont minute traits and then as you find that you've developed enough of a friendship to delve someone into specifics of kink qualify your candidates at that time but first you gotta find a guy then you gotta find a guy then determine if you suitable rather than look for men who have suitable kings and try to find the one that you have a mutual chemistry with.

The reason for my thinking on that is from a basic sales perspective... if you find a canidate thatt meets all of your requirements you're going to try to pound that round peg into a square hole