Go Back   Literotica Discussion Board > Main Literotica Forums > Authors' Hangout

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools

Old 12-18-2006, 11:00 PM   #1
The_Darkness
Ascending Demon
 
The_Darkness's Avatar
 
The_Darkness is offline
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: wishing I was in most of my stories...
Posts: 6,787
The Author's Hangout Vending Machine

Here's the deal.

One of the other forums I haunt has this "vending machine" thread. You put in something and the next person tells you what you get. They put in something and the person responding tells them what they get....and on and on and on. Let's see how long this one goes....

I put in an old stuffed animal.
__________________
Realist: We've got a serious problem here.
Optimist: There are no problems. Only opportunities to excel.
Realist You're a fucking douchebag.

The Darkness's dirty, filthy smut:

Last story submission accepted: 6-29-09 hit the link: Appalacia - Chapter 4: Pappa and Sally Mae take a ride in the truck.

Chapters five through eight are in the works!

If you've got time, don't forget to stop by

Cherry Hill

to read a collaborative effort from Redhairedandfriendly and myself!
 

Old 12-19-2006, 12:06 AM   #2
Zeb_Carter
...
 
Zeb_Carter's Avatar
 
Zeb_Carter is offline
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: In a state...
Posts: 10,317
And you get a brand spanking new security blanket!


I put in a copy of the LP News.
 

Old 12-19-2006, 12:07 AM   #3
The_Darkness
Ascending Demon
 
The_Darkness's Avatar
 
The_Darkness is offline
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: wishing I was in most of my stories...
Posts: 6,787
And you get a year of NPR Political debates on CD.

I put in a Beta Max player
__________________
Realist: We've got a serious problem here.
Optimist: There are no problems. Only opportunities to excel.
Realist You're a fucking douchebag.

The Darkness's dirty, filthy smut:

Last story submission accepted: 6-29-09 hit the link: Appalacia - Chapter 4: Pappa and Sally Mae take a ride in the truck.

Chapters five through eight are in the works!

If you've got time, don't forget to stop by

Cherry Hill

to read a collaborative effort from Redhairedandfriendly and myself!
 

Old 12-19-2006, 12:09 AM   #4
The_Fool
smiling for the camera
 
The_Fool's Avatar
 
The_Fool is offline
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 17,419
Quote:
Originally Posted by The_Darkness
And you get a year of NPR Political debates on CD.

I put in a Beta Max player
And got back a lifetime supply of eight-track tapes.

I put in an old used stylus from my record player.
__________________
Foolish Rants Redux

saying something foolish


Writing poetry is kind of like being a husband. You have to learn when to shut up and call it done.
 

Old 12-19-2006, 12:10 AM   #5
Zeb_Carter
...
 
Zeb_Carter's Avatar
 
Zeb_Carter is offline
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: In a state...
Posts: 10,317
Quote:
Originally Posted by The_Darkness
And you get a year of NPR Political debates on CD.

I put in a Beta Max player
And you get repeats of Nixon campaign speeches.


I put in a can of silly string, unused.
 

Old 12-19-2006, 12:12 AM   #6
The_Darkness
Ascending Demon
 
The_Darkness's Avatar
 
The_Darkness is offline
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: wishing I was in most of my stories...
Posts: 6,787
You get a can of old nacho cheese

I put in the redhead from my last summer fling.
__________________
Realist: We've got a serious problem here.
Optimist: There are no problems. Only opportunities to excel.
Realist You're a fucking douchebag.

The Darkness's dirty, filthy smut:

Last story submission accepted: 6-29-09 hit the link: Appalacia - Chapter 4: Pappa and Sally Mae take a ride in the truck.

Chapters five through eight are in the works!

If you've got time, don't forget to stop by

Cherry Hill

to read a collaborative effort from Redhairedandfriendly and myself!
 

Old 12-19-2006, 12:21 AM   #7
Selena_Kitt
heartbroken
 
Selena_Kitt's Avatar
 
Selena_Kitt is offline
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Born Free
Posts: 12,329
Quote:
Originally Posted by The_Darkness
I put in the redhead from my last summer fling.
And you get me!


I put in my bellybutton lint...
__________________
*~*~Selena~*~*

Blog Yahoo Group Lit Stories MySpace Facebook Twitter Website

"Welcome to the AH. Now quit being a fuckwaffle!" -lilredjammies
 

Old 12-19-2006, 12:22 AM   #8
Rumple Foreskin
The AH Patriarch
 
Rumple Foreskin's Avatar
 
Rumple Foreskin is offline
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Down so low in Austin, bottom looks like up
Posts: 11,109
And you get a scratched LP with Barbara Steisand singing, "Memories."

I put in a used but not-to-abused (or stained) January 1968, issue of Playboy.

Rumple Foreskin

ps: Dang Selena's cute hide. That was for The Darkness. Now I've gotta try again.

And you get a life-time supple of Q-tips.

I'll put in that same beat-up old Playboy.

rf
__________________
Don't take life so serious, son-it ain't no how permanent. - WALT KELLY

COLLY: ...only needs a hayseed and gun to get a part in any low class American movie that needs a small town idiot sheriff --- ABS: I still love him like an old dog that lies on the floor and farts --- VELLA: RumpleForeskin...was instrumental in saving the world --- KILLER MUFFIN: You know how to write smut --- ENGLISH LADY: I luv Rumple --- BLACK TULIP: worshipping the Rev. R. Foreskin.

Rumple's Reading Rubbish

Last edited by Rumple Foreskin : 12-19-2006 at 12:26 AM.
 

Old 12-19-2006, 12:52 AM   #9
slyc_willie
Captain Crash
 
slyc_willie's Avatar
 
slyc_willie is offline
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: In the flesh
Posts: 17,300
Cool

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rumple Foreskin
I'll put in that same beat-up old Playboy.

rf
And you get a one-day pass to Playboy Mansion.

I'll insert the handcuffs that used to hang from the rear-view mirror of my '69 Chevy Impala.
 

Old 12-19-2006, 02:04 AM   #10
3113
Colorful
 
3113's Avatar
 
3113 is offline
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Pluto
Posts: 13,631
Quote:
Originally Posted by slyc_willie
I'll insert the handcuffs that used to hang from the rear-view mirror of my '69 Chevy Impala.
And you get a dominatrix named Mistress Trixie

I'm putting in a Batman comic book.
__________________
3113




"You don't go up there to fish!"
--Brokeback Mountain
Why do writers write? Because it isn't there.
--Thomas Berger
 

Old 12-19-2006, 02:35 AM   #11
inlovewithyourghost
Literotica Guru
 
inlovewithyourghost is offline
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 1,259
Quote:
Originally Posted by 3113
And you get a dominatrix named Mistress Trixie

I'm putting in a Batman comic book.
And you get a snazzy imitation utility belt.

I put in a ball of rubberbands.
 

Old 12-19-2006, 02:56 AM   #12
3113
Colorful
 
3113's Avatar
 
3113 is offline
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Pluto
Posts: 13,631
Quote:
Originally Posted by inlovewithyourghost
And you get a snazzy imitation utility belt.
Cool!
__________________
3113




"You don't go up there to fish!"
--Brokeback Mountain
Why do writers write? Because it isn't there.
--Thomas Berger
 

Old 12-19-2006, 03:31 AM   #13
slyc_willie
Captain Crash
 
slyc_willie's Avatar
 
slyc_willie is offline
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: In the flesh
Posts: 17,300
Cool

Quote:
Originally Posted by 3113
And you get a dominatrix named Mistress Trixie
Oh, she whipped me dearly, thanks, 3113 . . . . I shall name one of the welts after you, LOL . . . .

You get the key to the lock on the handcuffs.
 

Old 12-19-2006, 03:33 AM   #14
slyc_willie
Captain Crash
 
slyc_willie's Avatar
 
slyc_willie is offline
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: In the flesh
Posts: 17,300
Cool

Quote:
Originally Posted by inlovewithyourghost
I put in a ball of rubberbands.
And you get a lifetime supply of 'spray-on' prophylactic.

I put in the never-used condom that sat in my wallet for 6 years.
 

Old 12-19-2006, 04:33 AM   #15
arienette
starving artist
 
arienette is offline
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 7,888
Quote:
Originally Posted by slyc_willie
And you get a lifetime supply of 'spray-on' prophylactic.

I put in the never-used condom that sat in my wallet for 6 years.
And you get a blow up doll.

I put in a pair of old slippers.
 

Old 12-19-2006, 06:09 AM   #16
S-Des
Comfortably Numb
 
S-Des's Avatar
 
S-Des is offline
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Is boredom a place???
Posts: 6,944
Quote:
Originally Posted by arienette
And you get a blow up doll.

I put in a pair of old slippers.
And you get a leather corset & panties

I put in all my video tapes that I had to record, but never watch...
__________________
.


"You know what music is? It's a harmonic connection between all living things. Robin Williams . . . August Rush


"...There are plenty of more important things going on in the world: Alberto Gonzalez, Darfur, the Genesis reunion tour... Stephen Colbert
 

Old 12-19-2006, 06:25 AM   #17
rachlou
Ice maiden
 
rachlou's Avatar
 
rachlou is offline
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Amidst chaos
Posts: 1,514
Quote:
Originally Posted by S-Des
And you get a leather corset & panties

I put in all my video tapes that I had to record, but never watch...
And you get my old rabbit vibrator that doesn't do the rotating beads bit anymore! But hey, its clean...

I put in the porno DVD i didn;t like, featuring the man with the skanky ponytail and grey socks ...
__________________
Current submissions My AH Profile MySpaceMy Website



That Love is all there is,
Is all we know of Love...
~ Emily Dickinson ~
 

Old 12-19-2006, 06:33 AM   #18
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Quote:
Originally Posted by rachlou
And you get my old rabbit vibrator that doesn't do the rotating beads bit anymore! But hey, its clean...

I put in the porno DVD i didn;t like, featuring the man with the skanky ponytail and grey socks ...
and you get an 8" black and white tv with no vertical hold.

i put in 3 darts with dull tips but great fins
 

Old 12-19-2006, 07:17 AM   #19
The_Darkness
Ascending Demon
 
The_Darkness's Avatar
 
The_Darkness is offline
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: wishing I was in most of my stories...
Posts: 6,787
Quote:
Originally Posted by vella_ms
and you get an 8" black and white tv with no vertical hold.

i put in 3 darts with dull tips but great fins
And you get a worn out puppy chew toy.

I put in an extremely used set of bed sheets.
__________________
Realist: We've got a serious problem here.
Optimist: There are no problems. Only opportunities to excel.
Realist You're a fucking douchebag.

The Darkness's dirty, filthy smut:

Last story submission accepted: 6-29-09 hit the link: Appalacia - Chapter 4: Pappa and Sally Mae take a ride in the truck.

Chapters five through eight are in the works!

If you've got time, don't forget to stop by

Cherry Hill

to read a collaborative effort from Redhairedandfriendly and myself!
 

Old 12-19-2006, 07:35 AM   #20
Rumple Foreskin
The AH Patriarch
 
Rumple Foreskin's Avatar
 
Rumple Foreskin is offline
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Down so low in Austin, bottom looks like up
Posts: 11,109
Quote:
Originally Posted by slyc_willie
And you get a one-day pass to Playboy Mansion.
Nice, but in the year 2525?

Let's see, second shot at The Darkness:

And you get a Magic-Fingers bed with a lumpy mattress straight from the Hot Springs Motel and Massage Parlor.

I'll put in a bag of quarters (okay, so it's a very, very small bag, so what?).

Rumple Foreskin
__________________
Don't take life so serious, son-it ain't no how permanent. - WALT KELLY

COLLY: ...only needs a hayseed and gun to get a part in any low class American movie that needs a small town idiot sheriff --- ABS: I still love him like an old dog that lies on the floor and farts --- VELLA: RumpleForeskin...was instrumental in saving the world --- KILLER MUFFIN: You know how to write smut --- ENGLISH LADY: I luv Rumple --- BLACK TULIP: worshipping the Rev. R. Foreskin.

Rumple's Reading Rubbish
 

Old 12-19-2006, 08:00 AM   #21
RogueLurker
gone
 
RogueLurker is offline
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 2,919
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rumple Foreskin
Nice, but in the year 2525?

Let's see, second shot at The Darkness:

And you get a Magic-Fingers bed with a lumpy mattress straight from the Hot Springs Motel and Massage Parlor.

I'll put in a bag of quarters (okay, so it's a very, very small bag, so what?).

Rumple Foreskin
And you get a Lotto649 (Canadian) /Powerball (US) ticket guaranteed to pay off big when you need the money most.


I put in all those cool organizing thingees that I've bought at Ikea but never actually used.
 

Old 12-19-2006, 08:43 AM   #22
SensualCealy
I do not know what the ..
 
SensualCealy's Avatar
 
SensualCealy is offline
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: future holds, but I DO know who holds my future!
Posts: 4,528
You get an accordian wall hanging cup holder!

I put in my 80s hair styles magazines and hairspray.
__________________
awesome
so then you'll be more like a waldorf...you only lack nuts
VELLA!

Sometimes it is better to have a "mindless" job.... Mcdonalds.. or whatever that you can leave behind...and save the creative stuff for yourself.~ Throbbs

I want to be friends with my children, right now is not the moment ~Amy Roloff
 

Old 12-19-2006, 08:43 AM   #23
cloudy
Alabama Slammer
 
cloudy's Avatar
 
cloudy is offline
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: neither here nor there
Posts: 37,964
Quote:
Originally Posted by SensualCealy
You get an accordian wall hanging cup holder!

I put in my 80s hair styles magazines and hairspray.
and you get the extra entertainment center that's been in the shed or the garage for the last year, because butthead won't get rid of it.

I put in 20+ pair of Tommy Hilfiger/Gap jeans that are a size too small for me now that I'm not working anymore.
__________________
Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart," all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart."

Dear politicians and/or assorted twats who are against immigration,

We would be glad to help you pack.

Sincerely, Native Americans
 

Old 12-19-2006, 08:51 AM   #24
SensualCealy
I do not know what the ..
 
SensualCealy's Avatar
 
SensualCealy is offline
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: future holds, but I DO know who holds my future!
Posts: 4,528
You get a years supply of stretchy pants by Vera Wang! lmao!

I put in white pickled beets and a can of spray cheese!
__________________
awesome
so then you'll be more like a waldorf...you only lack nuts
VELLA!

Sometimes it is better to have a "mindless" job.... Mcdonalds.. or whatever that you can leave behind...and save the creative stuff for yourself.~ Throbbs

I want to be friends with my children, right now is not the moment ~Amy Roloff
 

Old 12-19-2006, 08:54 AM   #25
Salvor-Hardon
A kiss is still a kiss
 
Salvor-Hardon's Avatar
 
Salvor-Hardon is offline
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: A sigh is still a sigh
Posts: 15,670
Quote:
Originally Posted by SensualCealy
You get a years supply of stretchy pants by Vera Wang! lmao!

I put in white pickled beets and a can of spray cheese!
And you get some wild funky hallucenogenic borscht, with cheese topping.

I put in 18 old PC100 sdram sticks just to clean up my office.
 
Closed Thread


Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump



All times are GMT -4. The time now is 07:38 AM.

Copyright 1998-2013 Literotica Online. Literotica is a registered trademark.