Submissive Positions

My Dom and I are in a long distance relationship, and while we have been in a relationship for many years and have always played with the idea of D/s, we recently deepened our exploration, and are now making an active effort to define and expand our D/s relationship.
Due to our professional careers we are away from each other months at a time, and as His submissive I would like to learn and train as much as possible on my own under His direction, of course, so that our play time together is not wasted on correction.
To this end, I was wondering if there were any websites with submissive positions, checklists, and exercises for submissives in training? Any help would be greatly appreciated as I am actively trying to learn more about my submissive side and define it.
While my journey into D/s began more than 9 years ago, I have just recently decided to begin really exploring my desires to submit and how to become the perfect submissive for my Dom. I greatly desire to please Him, and I recently discovered how much personal satifaction I get from obeying Him.
Thanks, again for any feedback.

Ihla said:

My Dom and I are in a long distance relationship, and while we have been in a relationship for many years and have always played with the idea of D/s, we recently deepened our exploration, and are now making an active effort to define and expand our D/s relationship.
Due to our professional careers we are away from each other months at a time, and as His submissive I would like to learn and train as much as possible on my own under His direction, of course, so that our play time together is not wasted on correction.
To this end, I was wondering if there were any websites with submissive positions, checklists, and exercises for submissives in training? Any help would be greatly appreciated as I am actively trying to learn more about my submissive side and define it.
While my journey into D/s began more than 9 years ago, I have just recently decided to begin really exploring my desires to submit and how to become the perfect submissive for my Dom. I greatly desire to please Him, and I recently discovered how much personal satifaction I get from obeying Him.
Thanks, again for any feedback.

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Hi Ihla and welcome to Lit!

My suggestion is that you ask him what he'd like you to do and how, rather than follow exercises off a website. It might be that his idea doesn't match the website's idea and your effort is moot.

Ihla said:

My Dom and I are in a long distance relationship, and while we have been in a relationship for many years and have always played with the idea of D/s, we recently deepened our exploration, and are now making an active effort to define and expand our D/s relationship.
Due to our professional careers we are away from each other months at a time, and as His submissive I would like to learn and train as much as possible on my own under His direction, of course, so that our play time together is not wasted on correction.
To this end, I was wondering if there were any websites with submissive positions, checklists, and exercises for submissives in training? Any help would be greatly appreciated as I am actively trying to learn more about my submissive side and define it.
While my journey into D/s began more than 9 years ago, I have just recently decided to begin really exploring my desires to submit and how to become the perfect submissive for my Dom. I greatly desire to please Him, and I recently discovered how much personal satifaction I get from obeying Him.
Thanks, again for any feedback.

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Do you mean, like the Gor positions and stuff?

And secondly, have you checked in with your dom that he wants you to learn this stuff? Seems to me it would be a bit of a waste to learn to be 'perfect' in the way other people perscribe, if he doesn't like/want it?

I'm assuming there's some basics and things that could be common to people, but personally, I would think that your submissive self is defined in direct relation to his dominant self, and how you combine as a couple.

I'd let him instruct, and let you grow organically.

PS: Seela, that's the seond time in as many weeks you and I have posted the exact same thing in the exact same minute. Get outta my head, woman!

Lizzie_Borden said:

PS: Seela, that's the seond time in as many weeks you and I have posted the exact same thing in the exact same minute. Get outta my head, woman!

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Nah, your head is a good place to be.
*goes off to look for Lizzies dirty fantasies*

seela said:

Nah, your head is a good place to be.
*goes off to look for Lizzies dirty fantasies*

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No! They're mine, goddamnit! No share-sies!

My Dom and I are both novices (Though, He is a natural Dom and I am not a natural submissive, as in, it is not my instinct to be submissive, but I absolutely can't get enough of it) and He has instructed me to find sites with detailed positions (not Gora), and He will choose which positions he deems necessary for me to learn and add modifications where He sees fit.

I understand that each D/s relationship is unique and everyone has their own unique desires. I am simply having a difficult time finding sites for novice subs in training that introduce common decorum, etc.
We are currently having very thorough discussions about eye contact and speech restriction. The more we explore, the more I have realized that we will create our own unique D/s relationship, which I love.
Thanks for the replies!

Ihla said:

My Dom and I are both novices (Though, He is a natural Dom and I am not a natural submissive, as in, it is not my instinct to be submissive, but I absolutely can't get enough of it) and He has instructed me to find sites with detailed positions (not Gora), and He will choose which positions he deems necessary for me to learn and add modifications where He sees fit.

I understand that each D/s relationship is unique and everyone has their own unique desires. I am simply having a difficult time finding sites for novice subs in training that introduce common decorum, etc.
We are currently having very thorough discussions about eye contact and speech restriction. The more we explore, the more I have realized that we will create our own unique D/s relationship, which I love.
Thanks for the replies!

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There's been a few sites linked to recently, but I didn't pay enough attention to them. I'm not aware of any positions etc that haven't had a basis in Gor, but I'm probably mistaken, and they're probably out there. I just worked the google-fu though, and plugged in 'bdsm slave positions' and found a host of links. Give that a whirl, and choose out what you like.

And while there *is* such a thing as 'common decorum' you don't have to apply it to yourselves if you don't want.

I think then, what you probably need are the checklists, to use as seed germs for ideas of the stuff you want to do.

On that front, I've found the checklists on bondage.com itself to be fairly solid and all-encompassing.

Ihla said:

My Dom and I are in a long distance relationship, and while we have been in a relationship for many years and have always played with the idea of D/s, we recently deepened our exploration, and are now making an active effort to define and expand our D/s relationship.
Due to our professional careers we are away from each other months at a time, and as His submissive I would like to learn and train as much as possible on my own under His direction, of course, so that our play time together is not wasted on correction.
To this end, I was wondering if there were any websites with submissive positions, checklists, and exercises for submissives in training? Any help would be greatly appreciated as I am actively trying to learn more about my submissive side and define it.
While my journey into D/s began more than 9 years ago, I have just recently decided to begin really exploring my desires to submit and how to become the perfect submissive for my Dom. I greatly desire to please Him, and I recently discovered how much personal satifaction I get from obeying Him.
Thanks, again for any feedback.

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Good posture

Know how to look pretty

Hands to yourself and being low enough to have to look up will do it

Ihla said:

I understand that each D/s relationship is unique and everyone has their own unique desires. I am simply having a difficult time finding sites for novice subs in training that introduce common decorum, etc.

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Perhaps this is because as some have said, there is not really anything which is common to all, or even most, as it is about fulfiling the needs of those involved, and as individuals this means there are more ways of doing than of not. Mind you, you will come across people and sites which will sell you the idea they can tell you just how it is supposed to be done, and what you both should and shouldn't do and feel, but you will find they are more about self importance and being right, than being right for you.

Ihla said:

We are currently having very thorough discussions about eye contact and speech restriction. The more we explore, the more I have realized that we will create our own unique D/s relationship, which I love.
Thanks for the replies!

Click to expand...

Exploring is good, and what you both may find is there is much to be learned by both of you about each other and what fits you both, through the process of training. While I understand you not wanting to waste time training in the limited time you have together, it helps you in the long term both in defining and getting to know what to expect from each other in various situations...sort of like trying to learn to drive from a book or DVD...it migth seem like you have all the necessary knowledge until the moment when you get behind the wheel and turn the engine on, then it becomes very different to what it seemed. As you may have already heard, it is more about the journey than rushing to the final destination....to rush to the destination robs you of a wealth of knowledge, experience, sharing, intimacy, and often, fun. Enjoy every moment as they all have their value.

Catalina

I didn't used to have much time for set positions. Not one that somebody else has specified are the 'right' ones anyway.

Having said that, I've borrowed a few from here... Maybe you both can do the same.
www.restrainedelegance.com/preview/lexicon1/icons/index.php

A personal favourite
www.restrainedelegance.com/preview/lexicon1/re6IMG_9105d.jpg

Thanks for the link!

Ihla said:

My Dom and I are both novices (Though, He is a natural Dom and I am not a natural submissive, as in, it is not my instinct to be submissive, but I absolutely can't get enough of it) and He has instructed me to find sites with detailed positions (not Gora), and He will choose which positions he deems necessary for me to learn and add modifications where He sees fit.

I understand that each D/s relationship is unique and everyone has their own unique desires. I am simply having a difficult time finding sites for novice subs in training that introduce common decorum, etc.
We are currently having very thorough discussions about eye contact and speech restriction. The more we explore, the more I have realized that we will create our own unique D/s relationship, which I love.
Thanks for the replies!

Click to expand...

Ihla, when I began my journey as a submissive an experienced Master/Dom sent me to the below website. He told me that it provided VERY useful information for both novice submissives and those that had been in the lifestyle for sometime who might be looking to garner additional information. I have found it extremely informative.

Hopefully, it will provide you with some useful info.

http://www.asubmissivesjourney.com/pageb.html

SNT4U