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Old 04-29-2011, 11:40 AM   #1
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The Men Suck (and not in a good way) Thread - WARNING: Serious Ranting Involved

Okay, maybe it's Freaky Friday or something, but it seems like every dude I have talked to this week is a fucking asshole-ish dickwaffle. So just for my own mental health, I am going to clarify a few things (and any other chicks are welcome to join if you wish:


NO! You do NOT have "an inner lesbian", dude! I don't care if you like pussy too. That does NOT make you a lesbian. Lesbians are WOMEN who love other women. We don't want your dick OR your attitude. You don't have a pussy, get it? You also don't have a fucking clue as how to please a woman so just shut the fuck up, okay?


NO! We don't need men to have babies! I live on a farm and I have a chicken coop. Chickens produce eggs. They are stupid, self centered animals that I have no desire to have sex with. Men are stupid, self centered animals that I have no desire to have sex with. Men produce sperm. There is no reason I can't have a man coop. A half dozen head of men should produce enough sperm to impregnated several states worth of women. (plus the fact that most fucking men would willingly and gladly stick their dicks in a milking machine). I figure less than a dozen "man ranches" would be needed for the whole country. There is no need for the rest of you hateful, war-mongering testosterone crazed asses!


NO! I don't secretly really, really want you! You suck. I . DO . NOT . LIKE . YOU! I have 0% fucking desire to have you stick your dick in me. Why would I? I make love to other women who know what they are really doing and they have an assortment of different shaped and sized things to use if I want something inside of me. Your sorry ass man dick just can't compare. Plus, like I said = you suck.


NO! I don't want to be your buddy! I know you hope that I will go with you to help you pick up chicks, but that ain't gonna happen. I have no desire to inflict your maleness on any of my sisters. Oh, and if I happen to hook up: HELL NO you can't watch you fucking sick perv!


NO! I don't wish I was a man! Are you kidding me? Why would I want to be stupid and smelly? Why would I want to think only with my dick? Why would I want to think scratching my balls was a fucking meditation technique? Just STFU already!


NO! Hanging out at Lesbian bars is NOT a cool thing to do! We go there to get the fuck away from people like you, asshole! Stay the hell out, K? (same goes for lesbian threads)!


NO! Two fake plastic titted porn actresses kissing is not lesbian sex! All that is is two fake plastic titted porn actresses kissing for money. Good for them for if you are stupid enough to pay to see them do it. (but we know you do).


*******

Okay, that's all I got for the moment, Ladies. PLease feel free to add your own (and I WILL be back!)
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Old 04-29-2011, 11:47 AM   #2
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I hope you feel better now !

Hello ,
Sorry your having such a bad week !!
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Old 04-29-2011, 12:14 PM   #3
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AMY!! You took all the good ones.

But here's mine from a slightly less lesbian point of view.

I am not your own personal fanatsy come to life~no seriously. I'm not. I am not gay for pay or queer for beer. I eat pussy cuz I am motherfucking GOOD at it. Don't think for two seconds that because I had a man for years and years before...that I am gonna make you and your lil bi-curious girly happy. If I make her happy? Nine times outta ten, she ain't gonna wanna fuck YOU. And it's for damn sure that I AIN"T GONNA DO IT>

Your penis in not the be all and end all~There. I said it. I walked away from a man who gave me three beautiful kidlets because I loved women MORE. You dig it? I gave up penis to play on the other side. I have no plans on ever returning but if I do? It won't be because YOUR DICK is so FUCKING AWESOME that I am droolin just thinking about it.

(Those were the two I heard last night after some dude tried to hit on me at work...fucking stupid ass...)

For the record. I like men. I adore them. I have a rack of guys that are some of my very best friends~all of that being said~

I don't CHEAT~not for your penis, not for the alcohol you keep trying to buy me, not for the nice car you drive. If I am WITH a woman, really with her? She is ALL I want. You offering your dick for a test drive will make me shank you.
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Old 04-29-2011, 12:44 PM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Luna_Wolf72 View Post
AMY!! You took all the good ones.

But here's mine from a slightly less lesbian point of view.

I am not your own personal fanatsy come to life~no seriously. I'm not. I am not gay for pay or queer for beer. I eat pussy cuz I am motherfucking GOOD at it. Don't think for two seconds that because I had a man for years and years before...that I am gonna make you and your lil bi-curious girly happy. If I make her happy? Nine times outta ten, she ain't gonna wanna fuck YOU. And it's for damn sure that I AIN"T GONNA DO IT>

Your penis in not the be all and end all~There. I said it. I walked away from a man who gave me three beautiful kidlets because I loved women MORE. You dig it? I gave up penis to play on the other side. I have no plans on ever returning but if I do? It won't be because YOUR DICK is so FUCKING AWESOME that I am droolin just thinking about it.

(Those were the two I heard last night after some dude tried to hit on me at work...fucking stupid ass...)

For the record. I like men. I adore them. I have a rack of guys that are some of my very best friends~all of that being said~

I don't CHEAT~not for your penis, not for the alcohol you keep trying to buy me, not for the nice car you drive. If I am WITH a woman, really with her? She is ALL I want. You offering your dick for a test drive will make me shank you.


Did not! (as you just proved!)



Matter 'o fact, here's one more:



NO! dude, It's not a complement to a dyke when you say "You look sexy in that blouse"! I don't WANT you to be trying to look down my fucking shirt, either. I know I don't have a bra on and that I have nice nipples, but they ain't there for you to look at, K? If you went to the aquarium and ogled Flippers titties people would treat you like the perv you are cuz she's a different species then you. SO THE FUCK AM I!!!!
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Old 04-29-2011, 12:46 PM   #5
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Damn, girl!

At the risk of suffering the "rath of amy", here's my 2 cents. "Men are this, Men are that", are you under the fucking impression that we all come straight out of the box with the same wiring? That just because one is, we all are? Hating someone just because they pee standing up is no different than hating someone just because of the color of their skin or their religion is different that yours! If you would have called this "Most Men Suck" thread, I would have chuckled and clicked the mouse, but here's a clue for you bitch, WE ARE ALL NOT ASSHOLES THAT ARE STUPID AND SMELL! Why don't you try judging people as individuals, not as a gender! And I almost forgot, with a attitude like that, I seriously doubt if the chicken would want to have sex with you either!!!!!!!!!
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Old 04-29-2011, 12:47 PM   #6
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Originally Posted by Safe_Bet View Post
Okay, maybe it's Freaky Friday or something, but it seems like every dude I have talked to this week is a fucking asshole-ish dickwaffle. So just for my own mental health, I am going to clarify a few things (and any other chicks are welcome to join if you wish:


NO! You do NOT have "an inner lesbian", dude! I don't care if you like pussy too. That does NOT make you a lesbian. Lesbians are WOMEN who love other women. We don't want your dick OR your attitude. You don't have a pussy, get it? You also don't have a fucking clue as how to please a woman so just shut the fuck up, okay?


NO! We don't need men to have babies! I live on a farm and I have a chicken coop. Chickens produce eggs. They are stupid, self centered animals that I have no desire to have sex with. Men are stupid, self centered animals that I have no desire to have sex with. Men produce sperm. There is no reason I can't have a man coop. A half dozen head of men should produce enough sperm to impregnated several states worth of women. (plus the fact that most fucking men would willingly and gladly stick their dicks in a milking machine). I figure less than a dozen "man ranches" would be needed for the whole country. There is no need for the rest of you hateful, war-mongering testosterone crazed asses!


NO! I don't secretly really, really want you! You suck. I . DO . NOT . LIKE . YOU! I have 0% fucking desire to have you stick your dick in me. Why would I? I make love to other women who know what they are really doing and they have an assortment of different shaped and sized things to use if I want something inside of me. Your sorry ass man dick just can't compare. Plus, like I said = you suck.


NO! I don't want to be your buddy! I know you hope that I will go with you to help you pick up chicks, but that ain't gonna happen. I have no desire to inflict your maleness on any of my sisters. Oh, and if I happen to hook up: HELL NO you can't watch you fucking sick perv!


NO! I don't wish I was a man! Are you kidding me? Why would I want to be stupid and smelly? Why would I want to think only with my dick? Why would I want to think scratching my balls was a fucking meditation technique? Just STFU already!


NO! Hanging out at Lesbian bars is NOT a cool thing to do! We go there to get the fuck away from people like you, asshole! Stay the hell out, K? (same goes for lesbian threads)!


NO! Two fake plastic titted porn actresses kissing is not lesbian sex! All that is is two fake plastic titted porn actresses kissing for money. Good for them for if you are stupid enough to pay to see them do it. (but we know you do).


*******

Okay, that's all I got for the moment, Ladies. PLease feel free to add your own (and I WILL be back!)
So, is it safe to assume that asking for a naked webcam session is out of the question? I'm just trying to clarify for all of us guys - your post left a lot of loopholes.
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Old 04-29-2011, 12:48 PM   #7
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Originally Posted by Safe_Bet View Post
Did not! (as you just proved!)



Matter 'o fact, here's one more:



NO! dude, It's not a complement to a dyke when you say "You look sexy in that blouse"! I don't WANT you to be trying to look down my fucking shirt, either. I know I don't have a bra on and that I have nice nipples, but they ain't there for you to look at, K? If you went to the aquarium and ogled Flippers titties people would treat you like the perv you are cuz she's a different species then you. SO THE FUCK AM I!!!!
I swear this is SOOOO goin in my fuckin siggy...it is. Don't try to stop me either!!!!

*gigglin my ass OFF*
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Old 04-29-2011, 12:50 PM   #8
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Originally Posted by luv2serve View Post
At the risk of suffering the "rath of amy", here's my 2 cents. "Men are this, Men are that", are you under the fucking impression that we all come straight out of the box with the same wiring? That just because one is, we all are? Hating someone just because they pee standing up is no different than hating someone just because of the color of their skin or their religion is different that yours! If you would have called this "Most Men Suck" thread, I would have chuckled and clicked the mouse, but here's a clue for you bitch, WE ARE ALL NOT ASSHOLES THAT ARE STUPID AND SMELL! Why don't you try judging people as individuals, not as a gender! And I almost forgot, with a attitude like that, I seriously doubt if the chicken would want to have sex with you either!!!!!!!!!

Number 1 example of why this thread exists [see above]


P.S. I ain't your "girl", you condecending asshole.

P.P.S. Here's your change. That wasn't worth 2 cents.
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Old 04-29-2011, 12:53 PM   #9
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So, is it safe to assume that asking for a naked webcam session is out of the question? I'm just trying to clarify for all of us guys - your post left a lot of loopholes.

I know I left a lot of loopholes. I did that on purpose. It is my hope that guys will stick their heads in them and hang themselves...
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Old 04-29-2011, 12:58 PM   #10
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So, is it safe to assume that asking for a naked webcam session is out of the question? I'm just trying to clarify for all of us guys - your post left a lot of loopholes.
Dude, I like you. Seriously. That was some funny shit right there. Made me snort Monster out my nose and that's sayin something.
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Old 04-29-2011, 12:58 PM   #11
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I know I left a lot of loopholes. I did that on purpose. It is my hope that guys will stick their heads in them and hang themselves...
I've asked around and we've decided that you left the loopholes because, deep down, you didn't really mean it.
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Old 04-29-2011, 12:59 PM   #12
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Dude, I like you. Seriously. That was some funny shit right there. Made me snort Monster out my nose and that's sayin something.
Funny? I was trying to be serious. :|

(Hey, it's Friday. A little levity doesn't hurt, does it?)
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Old 04-29-2011, 01:02 PM   #13
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Number 1 example of why this thread exists [see above]


P.S. I ain't your "girl", you condecending asshole.

P.P.S. Here's your change. That wasn't worth 2 cents.
You are EVIL!!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Safe_Bet View Post
I know I left a lot of loopholes. I did that on purpose. It is my hope that guys will stick their heads in them and hang themselves...
*cracks up* I friggin adore you! BUT, lemme interject~there are some good guys and even hard core dykes like you know it. Just seems like...there are fewer of em the more girls go out and *dyke off* for the crowd or a party favor or whatever.

Like I said before it's why I chose queer a LONG tiome ago to describe me. Bi has FAR too many negative connotations.

(I could name at least 10 straight dudes off the top of my head that would have added to this list and then went and started a women suck thread just to spite you. True they are MY peep's but that shouldn't count against em)
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Old 04-29-2011, 01:09 PM   #14
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I've asked around and we've decided that you left the loopholes because, deep down, you didn't really mean it.
Nope for the most part, she means it. Her gorgeous woman of a wife was just about the same way. The point is this thread was for women of any stripe to get their rants off.

Quote:
Originally Posted by RandallKinds View Post
Funny? I was trying to be serious. :|

(Hey, it's Friday. A little levity doesn't hurt, does it?)
No the levity doesn't hurt and I am glad you tried to interjet some lightness, but let's be real here for just a moment. There are always going to be people who don't dig other people because of something~ whether it be color, gender or an accent. I know plenty of real lesbians who feel like the thread starter but they aren't militant enough to go balls to the wall with it like Amy does or like smiley girl will once she sees this thread.

That's the plain and simple truth. Hell, until 4.5 years ago, I still dealt with women and men equally...and there were times I wanted to smash a guy's face in. Imagine how gross it must be for a woman who has NO sexual interest, never had a sexual interest and couldn't develop one if you paid her.

THAT is the point of her ranting...
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Old 04-29-2011, 01:13 PM   #15
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Originally Posted by Luna_Wolf72 View Post
You are EVIL!!!



*cracks up* I friggin adore you! BUT, lemme interject~there are some good guys and even hard core dykes like you know it. Just seems like...there are fewer of em the more girls go out and *dyke off* for the crowd or a party favor or whatever.

Like I said before it's why I chose queer a LONG tiome ago to describe me. Bi has FAR too many negative connotations.

(I could name at least 10 straight dudes off the top of my head that would have added to this list and then went and started a women suck thread just to spite you. True they are MY peep's but that shouldn't count against em)

And my reply is that if they are straight dudes why are they reading posts in a GLBT forum????? Something makes me think they ain't exactly Mr. "0" on the Kinsey scale!

and yeah, the "I kissed a girl once when I was drunk in college so I'm Bi" crowd is a little whacked.

You on the other hand are a LOT of whacked.
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Old 04-29-2011, 01:21 PM   #16
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And my reply is that if they are straight dudes why are they reading posts in a GLBT forum????? Something makes me think they ain't exactly Mr. "0" on the Kinsey scale!

and yeah, the "I kissed a girl once when I was drunk in college so I'm Bi" crowd is a little whacked.

You on the other hand are a LOT of whacked.
Well at least 5 of em are definite 0's~ the other 5~I would place in the cock fetish crowd. (And one of the completely straight one's would be my baby daddy. When I told him I wanted to be with women for real, he kissed me, told me he loved me...and never came at me again...ever. He is one of my VERY best friends.)

And to hell with you, woman!! I am not whacked, just a lil...a lot...a whole bunch...BENT..

Also~

(because I thought of something I was asked once)

YOU can NOT compare oral styles~you can not ask me for tips, advice or a demonstration. You can not say that you eat pussy like a woman and ask me if I want to find out. You CAN NOT DO IT. It is wrong and nasty and makes me want to punch you in the face, repeatedly.
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Old 04-29-2011, 07:59 PM   #17
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Gosh, I hope you guys aren't done...can't remember being this entertained.
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Old 04-29-2011, 08:03 PM   #18
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Ok, first off, I do agree with you that, as some prick said, hell is other people. But the idea of the male lebian is something that I've been thinking about recently.

I think that what guys who say that, are trying to get across is that they don't necessarily identify with the hegemonic notion of male sexual identity. They don't feel that the idea of "conquering" women and so forth describes who they would wish to relate to the fairer sex.

Unfortunately for them, this leaves them bereft of a cultural refernece point by which to deliniate their sexual identity, no labels to identify themselves by, thus they are drawn to that which they feel closest to, women who also defy gender stereotype. I think alot of strait male crossdressers fit into this category, wishing to feel closer to the feminine, but unsure of precisely how to do so.

Of course, some (most) guys are just bellends and judging for the rest of your post you seem to have encountered an large number of them this weeek, for which I can only apologise on behalf of bellends everywhere.
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Old 04-29-2011, 09:09 PM   #19
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I think that what guys who say that, are trying to get across is that they don't necessarily identify with the hegemonic notion of male sexual identity. They don't feel that the idea of "conquering" women and so forth describes who they would wish to relate to the fairer sex.
Which on its own is a fabulous statement. And it's something that I hear (and witness, even better,) off and on.

But just as I would NEVER tell a casual gay male acquaintance that I ID as a queer man-- because I already know how appropriative and rude that is-- EVEN THOUGH IT'S TRUE -- men don't need to be so rude to casual lesbian acquaintances.

Really not.

Nope.

Do I say things like that? Yes, when it's appropriate. When yanno... the pants are going to come off and the dude already knows that my plumbing isn't his normally preferred variety. And he wants to roleplay, and knows that we have established some mutual trust. (Admittedly, dudes trust a lot faster than dames do)

Or, when it doesn't fucking matter. When my saying so is not a big fat privileged presumption on his identity.
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Old 04-29-2011, 10:24 PM   #20
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Originally Posted by Safe_Bet View Post
Did not! (as you just proved!)



Matter 'o fact, here's one more:



NO! dude, It's not a complement to a dyke when you say "You look sexy in that blouse"! I don't WANT you to be trying to look down my fucking shirt, either. I know I don't have a bra on and that I have nice nipples, but they ain't there for you to look at, K? If you went to the aquarium and ogled Flippers titties people would treat you like the perv you are cuz she's a different species then you. SO THE FUCK AM I!!!!

Errrrrm, I kinda get what you're trying to say but, probably being a little pedantic and literalist here, you kinda are the same species what with you being human n all. You could potentially have babies (as in it would be possible, not that you may want to) with these guys who look down your top so...you're not a different species. You're a human being. And a lesbian asking to be treated like a different species is being a little silly really considering how badly we human folk treat other species.

As a mostly straight guy I see no problem with admiring the female form, whether straight, lesbian or transexual. It's natural to take a peek at something that interests you, whether you're going to get a go or not so I really don't understand why you're getting all pissy about it considering you probably take a good long look at straight females who would have no interest in you either. But never mind. It's ok. You be how you want to be and I'll just sit around and say "meh, whatever" a lot
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Old 04-29-2011, 11:32 PM   #21
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There's a big difference between looking at women-- and telling them you've been looking.

There's a big difference between telling a woman she looks good in a blouse-- and telling her she looks sexy in it.

"meh whatever" is a better thing to say, really. Or... nothing. The whole world (And I say this as someone who had to learn it myself) does NOT need to know your every thought.
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Old 04-30-2011, 12:17 AM   #22
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Old 04-30-2011, 12:24 AM   #23
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Originally Posted by Missouribiguy View Post
Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed.
The wrong side of the week.
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An essay for BDSM Newbies; Top, bottom, dominant, submissive-- and the differences thereof Now rewritten with extra sparkle!
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Old 04-30-2011, 01:25 AM   #24
girlsmiley
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Rant...


This is not directed at men, ok?

Why are limp dick BOYS posting here?

You're curious, right? You disrespectful pieces of shit... You want to know why and how I can give your non existent girlfriend orgasms?

What is wrong with you? (We need a poll)

1. Your mother dropped you when you were a baby

2. A glutton for punishment?

3. Safe_Bet is correct and you REALLY ARE THAT STUPID


Trolling is so immature.
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Old 04-30-2011, 01:37 AM   #25
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Originally Posted by Tsoert View Post
Errrrrm, I kinda get what you're trying to say but, probably being a little pedantic and literalist here, you kinda are the same species what with you being human n all. You could potentially have babies (as in it would be possible, not that you may want to) with these guys who look down your top so...you're not a different species. You're a human being. And a lesbian asking to be treated like a different species is being a little silly really considering how badly we human folk treat other species.

As a mostly straight guy I see no problem with admiring the female form, whether straight, lesbian or transexual. It's natural to take a peek at something that interests you, whether you're going to get a go or not so I really don't understand why you're getting all pissy about it considering you probably take a good long look at straight females who would have no interest in you either. But never mind. It's ok. You be how you want to be and I'll just sit around and say "meh, whatever" a lot
So. You're a virgin and...
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