Conditioning / Cumming on Command

Hi all -
I would love to be able to cum on command. Thanks to Allyourbase who, in posting links to articles in another thread, turned me on to the one below (the link to the full article is at the very bottom of this post).

I would like to hear from anyone who can cum on command - how did you get there? How long did it take? Tips? Does it only work if you are already highly sexually aroused, or can you go from like zero to sixty in a few seconds flat? Please share your experiences. Thanks!

Also, if you tried conditioning and it didn't work, I would like to hear about that too...

-PF-

Conditioning (part II)

Another fun and kinky way to play with the mind's incredible flexibility is to use good old-fashioned operant conditioning in the bedroom.

Pick a word, or a name, and say it when your partner reaches orgasm. Keep saying it as your partner comes. Continue to do this every time you have sex; gradually use the word just the instant before your partner comes, then a little bit longer before orgasm, then a little bit longer...

With work and practice, it's often possible to train your partner to orgasm whenever they hear that word. Like, in the mall, in the office, anywhere.

http://www.xeromag.com/fvbdsm_scenarios.html

Sounds like somebody's wet dream, to me.

I could be wrong though, and hope I am.

agree with twister here

There have been plenty of posts here where people have referred to this, so I am looking for them to talk about it here, please.
So if you have ACTUALLY tried this and succeeded or failed - please post. Thanks.

ff

I have succeded as a paraplegic I cant cum normally but certain aspects of my rehab have triggered it.
Being told to take a deep breath, somehow sets every light off

.....................

sdineen said:

I have succeded as a paraplegic I cant cum normally but certain aspects of my rehab have triggered it.
Being told to take a deep breath, somehow sets every light off

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So do you know why it happens?? Was there anything associated with you being told to take a deep breath in the past that you can think of that might have influenced this? Did it just happen one day, or did you notice yourself building up to it? And does that only happen in your rehab setting?, or can you make it happen anywhere?
Ok, and I hope I am laughing with you here... what happened the first time somebody told you to take a deep breath and you got off? I can only imagine there were surprised faces all around

raffi_sandoval said:

I used to have a mistress who would/could make me cum on her demand. I would get very excited just hearing her voice. She told me in advance that this was something she could do, but at first I just blew it off.

She would leave me messages that would get me very excited...nothing explicit in the messages. Just hearing her voice.

I'm not sure if it was conditions or learning how to cum on command, but I would really be interested into exploring this more.

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Hi Raffi -
That sounds awesome... if you want to share anything else - like did she have a special word that she would use? Or would she just tell you to cum for her? Maybe just her telling you that she could do this got her hooks into your brain and made it happen over time? If you explore it any more please let me know how it goes!!

I used to be able orgasm on voice alone.
My ex could lower his voice, speak very quietly and calmly and I would be gone.

The first time it happened shocked us both, it was very unexpected.
He did not need to talk in a sexual way, it was about his tone and volume level (he did post about it in the oral thread under the name Andante).

I think I have a high sex drive, and loathe many aspects of vanilla foreplay.
Perhaps that is part of the reason I could do that.
I can also orgasm through nipple/breast pain and by giving him oral.
For me, fucking is an optional extra in relation to orgasms.

shy slave said:

I used to be able orgasm on voice alone.
My ex could lower his voice, speak very quietly and calmly and I would be gone.

The first time it happened shocked us both, it was very unexpected.
He did not need to talk in a sexual way, it was about his tone and volume level (he did post about it in the oral thread under the name Andante).

I think I have a high sex drive, and loathe many aspects of vanilla foreplay.
Perhaps that is part of the reason I could do that.
I can also orgasm through nipple/breast pain and by giving him oral.
For me, fucking is an optional extra in relation to orgasms.

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I envy you ridiculously.

I never managed to condition the orgasm on a word alone, there was at least another physical trigger (slap on the ass etc.) required. And they already were affected by my voice before. I don't think training itself, without matching preconditions, is enough.

Isn't Homburg a practitioner of this?

And hasn't Wenchie been the subject of it? (Quite separately from the Homburg thing, I hasten to add!)

lovebound said:

I envy you ridiculously.

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Lol
Thank you!

Primalex said:

I never managed to condition the orgasm on a word alone, there was at least another physical trigger (slap on the ass etc.) required. And they already were affected by my voice before. I don't think training itself, without matching preconditions, is enough.

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An ex of mine could get me pretty wet just by running a finger along the crook of my arm, that crease inside the elbow. Unfortunately neither of us thought to pair that with conditioning orgasms at the time... This was my pre-BDSM days. (Not that many days currently are BDSM days...)

Still, I wish I'd tried it.

Training and conditioning for this takes a lot of time and patience. There is no way this can also be achieved through online communication alone. You need the physical aspect and closeness for it to work, anyone that claims they have done from an entirely cyber aspect it bullshitting you, or they have be lied to by their significant other about cumming.

Has anyone claimed to have it happen from an online encounter?

I think that's called masturbating

shy slave said:

Has anyone claimed to have it happen from an online encounter?

I think that's called masturbating

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No I wasn't addressing any one post here, just had heard it said before.

Aggressive One said:

No I wasn't addressing any one post here, just had heard it said before.

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Thanks for explaining.

It's true, on the 'net anyone will try and make you believe anything.

I think the Lit bullshit meter works well though!

shy slave said:

Thanks for explaining.

It's true, on the 'net anyone will try and make you believe anything.

I think the Lit bullshit meter works well though!

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hmmmm have done it online. video chatting but still online *shrug*

I would like to hear from anyone who can cum on command - how did you get there? Does it only work if you are already highly sexually aroused, or can you go from like zero to sixty in a few seconds flat?

Yes I do cum on His command,but this is an unusual situation. I do not cum on just anyone's command. There have been others in my life whose command could bring me to orgasm but in each case my submission was always the key.It is not something that happens in casual play , it requires a very special connection.The stronger the connection the faster I am able to cum on command Master's voice can make me come in seconds or even moments. This can sometimes be quite painful if my body is not primed to cum, if Master catches me unawares the cramping spasms can be very intense as well as obviously very pleasurable.

The reverse is also true that in some cases with some of my submissives over the years they too can cum on command.One particular submissive who has been with me for many years can cum with in the space of 60 seconds when I simply lay my hand against her face and ask her to cum for me. And I say 'simply' when really it is not, we have a very close bond that has developed over the years.

How long did it take?

With Master it took almost no time at all.
The first person who was able to command my orgasm was a long time ago and it took quite some time before the situation developed. But that was more about my then inexperience and a trust needing to build than anything in particular that he did.

Tips?

From anecdotal evidence I see that this is much easier for me that it appears to be for other people. It may be that my ability to cum by thought alone with no physical contact at all has made this somewhat easier.But it is always about the fact that I wish to please Master with every part of me and in every possible way to the utmost of my ability.
As I have said before 'what writes strongly in the mind, writes strongly in the body'.
In the case of my submissives however it has always simply been that when our relationship develops in intensity ,my request of 'cum for me'pushes my submissive's body to follow their need to obey.

I know it is possible to train someone like 'Pavlov's dog'but I wouldn't want to.
Hmm tapping my chin, that's not entirely true there are some conditioned responses that I deliberately set out to achieve in my submissives by the use of ritualistic or repetitive behaviour: tapping a flogger against my boot to escalate anticipation, my breath in a submissives ear when they are blindfolded to raise apprehension or even something as simple as the use of clothing or accoutrements to set the scene. But I don't believe I deliberately set out to induce orgasm on command, I find this a gift not to be taken lightly but that is my personal view and obviously many others don't hold it.

shy slave said:

...
My ex could lower his voice, speak very quietly and calmly and I would be gone.
...
He did not need to talk in a sexual way, it was about his tone and volume level (he did post about it in the oral thread under the name Andante).

Click to expand...

Interesting! I will see if I can search that out. I'm guessing this was just him talking in general, and not a pre-set word?

Primalex said:

I never managed to condition the orgasm on a word alone...

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So you tried specifically using a single word?

Primalex said:

there was at least another physical trigger (slap on the ass etc.) required. And they already were affected by my voice before. I don't think training itself, without matching preconditions, is enough.

Click to expand...

Can you upload a sample of your voice?

Cattypuss said:

Isn't Homburg a practitioner of this?

And hasn't Wenchie been the subject of it? (Quite separately from the Homburg thing, I hasten to add!)

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Thanks Catty! *Looks around* Must find Wenchie...

Aggressive One said:

Training and conditioning for this takes a lot of time and patience.
...
You need the physical aspect and closeness for it to work
...

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Hi AO -
I expect to put my time in here. Hell, cumming with contact can take time and patience I am wondering if physical proximity is strictly necessary, though... If it's all in our heads, and I close my eyes, what's the difference on who is in the room?? Though I certainly have to admit, having someone physically there does seem like it would be much easier...

Kajira Callista said:

hmmmm have done it online. video chatting but still online *shrug*

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Hi KC -
Can you elaborate? From my original post:
I would like to hear from anyone who can cum on command - how did you get there? How long did it take? Tips? Does it only work if you are already highly sexually aroused, or can you go from like zero to sixty in a few seconds flat? Please share your experiences. Thanks!

switchbitch said:

Yes I do cum on His command, but this is an unusual situation. I do not cum on just anyone's command. There have been others in my life whose command could bring me to orgasm but in each case my submission was always the key.
...
I know it is possible to train someone like 'Pavlov's dog' but I wouldn't want to.
Hmm tapping my chin, that's not entirely true there are some conditioned responses that I deliberately set out to achieve in my submissives by the use of ritualistic or repetitive behaviour:
...
I find this a gift not to be taken lightly but that is my personal view and obviously many others don't hold it.

Click to expand...

SB -
Agreed - the mindset has to be there. I feel that already.
I don't think we can truly be compared to Pavlov's dogs, as anyone in a situation like this wants to be there. while Pavlov's dogs were just fucking hungry
A gift not to be taken lightly, so true! I hope I get there one day...

Pleasure_Fan said:

Agreed - the mindset has to be there. I feel that already.
I don't think we can truly be compared to Pavlov's dogs, as anyone in a situation like this wants to be there. while Pavlov's dogs were just fucking hungry
A gift not to be taken lightly, so true! I hope I get there one day...

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He also horribly mutilated/dissected/opened them up while they were alive and drooling or eating.

But as for the topic at hand, I'm curious as to this phenomenon as well, though I'm fairly certain I could never get anywhere close to it.

KoPilot said:

He also horribly mutilated/dissected/opened them up while they were alive and drooling or eating.

But as for the topic at hand, I'm curious as to this phenomenon as well, though I'm fairly certain I could never get anywhere close to it.

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Wondering why?

Pleasure_Fan said:

So you tried specifically using a single word?

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What else? Cumming during phone sex is an innate ability of women anyway.

Can you upload a sample of your voice?

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Sure.

Can you pay the price for it?