Old 07-11-2013, 01:21 PM   #2051
RjThoughts
they call me The Rojodi!
 
RjThoughts's Avatar
 
RjThoughts is offline
Join Date: May 2001
Location: New York state
Posts: 21,251
Quote:
Originally Posted by Emerson40 View Post
You know, most made up words (good ones and bad ones) are portmanteau words. And there are some good ones.

Even "ginormous" is one of these. I've used Fantabulous (I took Fantastic and Fabulous, and voilą) on these boards recently.

In a recent conversation someone used "gymtimidation" when describing a bad experience at a gym, where muscle-heads and folks far fitter than this person shot disapproving looks and made him feel unwelcome. I thought it clever at the time.

There is a time and place for being creative, clever, and cute. I wouldn't drop "stiplificate" during a job interview.

The ones I do take issue with - and I'm sure some of the folks involved in education see more than I could imagine - are the words that are just bastardized, and then defended as right.

example: Suffercate - "Yes, it's a word. 'Cause the dude is sufferin' from not breathing"

I've also heard adults use "bob wire", "expresso", axe / aks instead of ask, mannaise, and jewlery.
Add "mayernaisse", "paseghetti/sgettis", "tor Till a", and "Fill et" to what I've heard adults say.
  Reply With Quote

Old 07-11-2013, 07:24 PM   #2052
dangersexqueen
Literotica Guru
 
dangersexqueen's Avatar
 
dangersexqueen is offline
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: The Lone Star State
Posts: 601
Back to the asshat messages you can get.

I got this a couple of weeks ago.. First Contact mind you.. From a Virgin on the forum.

Quote:
Adrenaline

Hey, turns out you really caught my eye now and I'd really love to explore more of you now, driving you crazy just by making you moan from pleasure making you go crazy as my tongue slithers all in your wet clit with the feeling that you'd just explode any second, to bite your hard nipples and tease you as i suck on those nice breasts and again go lower as my lips kiss your curvacious waist while my hand gropes your perfect ass in need for spanking!

Really? He wants to bestow upon me that honor.. LOL

He cannot say he was not warned that I would post this on this thread..

Hmm...
__________________
I know that one day your goal is to ruin me for any other living man, imagine that!
I am aware that you think I am so very innocent, but I will never be your doormat.
I want your body, in every way imaginable, I burn ever brighter than a fire burns.
I love that all of this is a secret that only your body can coax, fuck and discern.


My Poem

Curiosity often leads to trouble.~~ I am Dangersexqueen, Nice to meet you..

DISCLAIMER: Asshat PMs will probably earn you a starring role in the PM Asshattery thread.

  Reply With Quote

Old 07-12-2013, 02:05 AM   #2053
NippleMuncher
Masticatus Nipplicanis
 
NippleMuncher's Avatar
 
NippleMuncher is offline
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Lost in Imfamy
Posts: 3,594
Quote:
Originally Posted by dangersexqueen View Post
Really? He wants to bestow upon me that honor.. LOL
Well, with an av like that, can you blame him? You've only brought this on yourself . . .

<ducks for cover>
__________________
Boobies are like toy trains ... They are meant for kids but big boys like playing with them too!
  Reply With Quote

Old 07-15-2013, 10:26 AM   #2054
davro
Really Experienced
 
davro is offline
Join Date: Oct 2004
Posts: 116
Quote:
Originally Posted by UCanBLeafinMe View Post

When you're trying to convince someone to "cyber", it's annoying
True,nothing stuffs a great orgasm like sloppy grammar.
  Reply With Quote

Old 07-15-2013, 02:06 PM   #2055
UCanBLeafinMe
Crabby
 
UCanBLeafinMe's Avatar
 
UCanBLeafinMe is offline
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Somewhere in NY, near Albany
Posts: 2,125
A "member" PMed me, 0 posts but on the forums since 2005?
Like really I'm going to chat with him?
__________________
Why yes, I am a bitch! Deal with it!
  Reply With Quote

Old 07-15-2013, 10:21 PM   #2056
NippleMuncher
Masticatus Nipplicanis
 
NippleMuncher's Avatar
 
NippleMuncher is offline
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Lost in Imfamy
Posts: 3,594
Quote:
Originally Posted by UCanBLeafinMe View Post
A "member" PMed me, 0 posts but on the forums since 2005?
Like really I'm going to chat with him?
By "member", of course, we assume that you mean some dick!
__________________
Boobies are like toy trains ... They are meant for kids but big boys like playing with them too!
  Reply With Quote

Old 07-18-2013, 04:32 PM   #2057
SweetSam42
Everyday Pinup Girl
 
SweetSam42's Avatar
 
SweetSam42 is offline
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 2,684
Quote:
Originally Posted by annayarnkitten View Post
Got this "Gem" this morning. Seriously WTF!!

14m here,. How are you? hope your having a great night would luv to chat with you on yahoo

*hugs*

...excuse me while I vomit. I know some people have a kink but really!?
Even if he is pretending....

I got this exact PM. Twice. WTF is right.
  Reply With Quote

Old 07-23-2013, 01:01 AM   #2058
NippleMuncher
Masticatus Nipplicanis
 
NippleMuncher's Avatar
 
NippleMuncher is offline
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Lost in Imfamy
Posts: 3,594
Just to let you ladies know, you're not the only one to get PMs from leg humpers.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Asshat of the day
Any naughty pics I could see of you?
Quote:
Originally Posted by NippleMuncher
So you're into cock, are you?
Was going to include a bit of CBT for the crap stain, but decided not to. Maybe some granny porn would get his motor revving?
__________________
Boobies are like toy trains ... They are meant for kids but big boys like playing with them too!
  Reply With Quote

Old 07-23-2013, 01:06 AM   #2059
NippleMuncher
Masticatus Nipplicanis
 
NippleMuncher's Avatar
 
NippleMuncher is offline
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Lost in Imfamy
Posts: 3,594
And so the conversation continues:

Quote:
Originally Posted by Asshat of the Day
You a guy?
Quote:
Originally Posted by NippleMuncher
No, I'm a lesbian trapped in a man's body. You're not going to let that stop you from an awesome time, are you?
__________________
Boobies are like toy trains ... They are meant for kids but big boys like playing with them too!
  Reply With Quote

Old 07-23-2013, 01:15 AM   #2060
NippleMuncher
Masticatus Nipplicanis
 
NippleMuncher's Avatar
 
NippleMuncher is offline
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Lost in Imfamy
Posts: 3,594
Apparently he wants to up the ante:

Quote:
Originally Posted by AHOTD
You have pics
Quote:
Originally Posted by NippleMuncher
Ok, but just one, because I like you.
__________________
Boobies are like toy trains ... They are meant for kids but big boys like playing with them too!
  Reply With Quote

Old 07-23-2013, 01:24 AM   #2061
NippleMuncher
Masticatus Nipplicanis
 
NippleMuncher's Avatar
 
NippleMuncher is offline
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Lost in Imfamy
Posts: 3,594
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hundojoe
How did you post that pic on here like that?
Step 1 - take pic
Step 2 - upload pic
Step 3 - send pic to PM amore
__________________
Boobies are like toy trains ... They are meant for kids but big boys like playing with them too!
  Reply With Quote

Old 07-23-2013, 01:28 AM   #2062
NippleMuncher
Masticatus Nipplicanis
 
NippleMuncher's Avatar
 
NippleMuncher is offline
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Lost in Imfamy
Posts: 3,594
And so it goes . . .

Quote:
Originally Posted by AHOTD
What's pm amore?
sorry I'm new to this
Ooh, a virgin!
__________________
Boobies are like toy trains ... They are meant for kids but big boys like playing with them too!
  Reply With Quote

Old 07-23-2013, 01:31 AM   #2063
NippleMuncher
Masticatus Nipplicanis
 
NippleMuncher's Avatar
 
NippleMuncher is offline
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Lost in Imfamy
Posts: 3,594
And he's SMART too!

Quote:
Originally Posted by AHOTD
Yea, that didn't help me out

Didn't reply, I'm too tired to play.
__________________
Boobies are like toy trains ... They are meant for kids but big boys like playing with them too!
  Reply With Quote

Old 07-23-2013, 09:58 AM   #2064
Saucyminx
Putting it all away
 
Saucyminx's Avatar
 
Saucyminx is offline
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 3,158
Quote:
Originally Posted by NippleMuncher View Post
And he's SMART too!




Didn't reply, I'm too tired to play.
Are you alright honey? You. . . too tired to play? WTF? Btw--that looks much dif from the pic you sent me.


I had a RL Asshattery moment. I was thrust into the wingman position for my friend when we were out on Sat night. Being the polite woman that I am, I was chatting with his friend, who had quite the thick and chunky accent so I was getting about 6 words out of 10 average. Most of my half of the conversation consisted of "What?"

He was leaning in to talk into my ear because the music was loud and suddenly he said, "You divorced. I divorced. We get rid of your married friend and you go back to room with friend and me, yes?" And then tried to kiss me. Let's just say, that didn't end well for him. I took hold of my married friend by her ear, and we got the hell out of dodge.

Was anyone else aware that if you have divorce in common, it means you are up for a threesome? I mean I've been divorced for 3 years now, and that was a first for me.
__________________
My first new story in 3 long years

Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional. -- Kathleen Casey Theisen

Some days it just doesn't pay to gnaw through the leather straps. --Emo Philips

Don't think about it, just swallow. --my friend Eileen

She went around with a broken heart, and she wasn't sure who'd broken it. She thought it was herself, mostly.
― Ann Brashares


Come on in--the smut is fine
  Reply With Quote

Old 07-23-2013, 01:02 PM   #2065
NippleMuncher
Masticatus Nipplicanis
 
NippleMuncher's Avatar
 
NippleMuncher is offline
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Lost in Imfamy
Posts: 3,594
Quote:
Originally Posted by Saucyminx View Post
Are you alright honey? You. . . too tired to play? WTF?
When it comes to asshat PMers, yes, especially when beaten into submission by a very long day. When it comes to one of my favorite Litsters, I can go all night!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Saucyminx View Post
Btw--that looks much dif from the pic you sent me.
I wanted to send this asshat something special.
__________________
Boobies are like toy trains ... They are meant for kids but big boys like playing with them too!
  Reply With Quote

Old 07-23-2013, 09:08 PM   #2066
UCanBLeafinMe
Crabby
 
UCanBLeafinMe's Avatar
 
UCanBLeafinMe is offline
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Somewhere in NY, near Albany
Posts: 2,125
Received this...

Quote:
Originally Posted by XYZ
Hey Honey,

I just saw your profile and my god! You've gotten me so hard and horny, I suddenly found myself wishing that you wanted a fun young guy to have a good time with and maybe teach a few things? Wishful thinking I know!

I'm NamedChanged, I'm a 22 year old guy from the UK who absolutely adores sexy women and loves to excite them just as much as they excite me. I'm currently studying at Oxford (so, rest assured, I'm not your typical male) and can never resist the opportunity to converse with a gorgeous, sultry minx.

I'm 6 foot tall, around 75 kg, slim, athletic figure with blonde hair and blue eyes. If you'd like to chat and maybe (I certainly hope so...) more, let me know. You sound delicious and I would love for us to broaden our horizons together... and get you so hot and flustered that your hands furtively start to creep into your knickers... seeking to satisfy your dripping, swollen desire...

Kisses
NameChanged
He wrote that he wasn't "your typical male", yet said exactly what many others have.
__________________
Why yes, I am a bitch! Deal with it!
  Reply With Quote

Old 07-24-2013, 09:48 AM   #2067
NippleMuncher
Masticatus Nipplicanis
 
NippleMuncher's Avatar
 
NippleMuncher is offline
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Lost in Imfamy
Posts: 3,594
Quote:
Originally Posted by UCanBLeafinMe View Post
He wrote that he wasn't "your typical male", yet said exactly what many others have.
He's right, your typical male doesn't/didn't go to Oxford.
__________________
Boobies are like toy trains ... They are meant for kids but big boys like playing with them too!
  Reply With Quote

Old 07-27-2013, 10:16 AM   #2068
RedheadedSlutL
Experienced
 
RedheadedSlutL is offline
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: mid-west
Posts: 76
I can't remember what "her" first message was bit it sounded like a 14 year-old boy wrote it.

In the next message "She" says:
So what do you mean by mostly straight..? I'd love to hear about the times you weren't!

Something about 'her' just didn't ring true...so I said:
You first.

So the best "she" can do is:
hmm... I definitely enjoy the company of girls, it started with a drunken experience in college and has grown a lot since. Lots of fooling around with girlfriends, a few threesomes, and playing around with older couples. I find a lot of married women love being with younger girls and they're a lot of fun in the bedroom. All that being said, I've never been with a red head! I've heard they can be pretty crazy in bed too and I'd love to find out some day. Until then I'd love to hear some of your stories...

"All that being said?" you said nothing!

"She" should have gone with, "One time at band camp..."

So I said:
You want my "stories" and you give me generalities?

Be interesting to see if he just drops it or makes up something lame.
__________________
He should be careful what he wishes for!
  Reply With Quote

Old 07-27-2013, 10:19 AM   #2069
RedheadedSlutL
Experienced
 
RedheadedSlutL is offline
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: mid-west
Posts: 76
well that didn't take long:

so I get back this:
I'm definitely willing to give detailed stories but there have been a lot of experiences so you'd have to be more specific as to which you'd want to hear about. I was just giving you a general idea. I re-live most of my experiences with girls over and over in my head so I have no issues providing detailed stories, lol. Which would you like to hear about?



Edit:

I was going to let it lie...but NO i had to add:
I can understand that...as a general idea...I am "mostly straight"

So he says:

That definitely leaves room for interpretation... lol

I have a few friends that would probably fall into that category. They've fooled around with other girls, mostly above the waist and had threesomes with guy's where there is no real girl-on-girl action. I would say I'm pretty much fully bi but more experienced with guys just because they're naturally more easy to hook up with.


It's becoming torture.
__________________
He should be careful what he wishes for!

Last edited by RedheadedSlutL : 07-27-2013 at 10:34 AM.
  Reply With Quote

Old 07-27-2013, 10:29 AM   #2070
RedheadedSlutL
Experienced
 
RedheadedSlutL is offline
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: mid-west
Posts: 76
and as a general complaint...I lost count of how many, "Hey, how are you doing?" messages.

does that ever work?

I'm not sure if thats worse than the ones that say:

HI..Im married/single/don't say male 18/24/35/57/73 I am 4'/5'/6' tall I am a fireman/indian chief/superhero/wino, I live in Rome/paris/a trailer park/mansion, (bonus points if they include penis size)..I like redheads ..I was wondering if you wanted to chat?

its like a mass emailed personal ad from 2000.


Edit:
Is it the lunar phases doing this today???
I was warned me about the messages...first few days, not so bad...today??? weirdness...especially chicks.

I've browsed some bi-threads but havent posted anything about that at all...

so where did this one come from:
Hi are you into females? My daddy is looking for a second sub and a playmate for me. Would you be interested? This would be a long term thing

her profile says something like she is owned by so and so so dont even THINK of trying to talk to her...huh?

then i looked at her posts and something about knowing her owner for the last three weeks....a long term thing???
__________________
He should be careful what he wishes for!

Last edited by RedheadedSlutL : 07-27-2013 at 11:11 AM.
  Reply With Quote

Old 07-27-2013, 12:40 PM   #2071
Wide_eyed_Indulgence
Literotica Guru
 
Wide_eyed_Indulgence's Avatar
 
Wide_eyed_Indulgence is offline
Join Date: May 2013
Posts: 927
Quote:
Originally Posted by dangersexqueen View Post
Back to the asshat messages you can get.

I got this a couple of weeks ago.. First Contact mind you.. From a Virgin on the forum.

Hey, turns out you really caught my eye now and I'd really love to explore more of you now, driving you crazy just by making you moan from pleasure making you go crazy as my tongue slithers all in your wet clit with the feeling that you'd just explode any second, to bite your hard nipples and tease you as i suck on those nice breasts and again go lower as my lips kiss your curvacious waist while my hand gropes your perfect ass in need for spanking!


Really? He wants to bestow upon me that honor.. LOL

He cannot say he was not warned that I would post this on this thread..

Hmm...

I got the same, word-for-word a couple of weeks ago. How could I have resisted?
  Reply With Quote

Old 07-27-2013, 08:02 PM   #2072
C5MiGuy
Literotica Guru
 
C5MiGuy is offline
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Michigan
Posts: 1,898
I'm just glad I haven't been mentioned here.

*whew*
  Reply With Quote

Old 07-27-2013, 08:13 PM   #2073
BeachMomma
Sweet n Innocent
 
BeachMomma's Avatar
 
BeachMomma is offline
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: In your wildest dreams
Posts: 3,974
Quote:
Originally Posted by RedheadedSlutL View Post
and as a general complaint...I lost count of how many, "Hey, how are you doing?" messages.

does that ever work?

I'm not sure if thats worse than the ones that say:

HI..Im married/single/don't say male 18/24/35/57/73 I am 4'/5'/6' tall I am a fireman/indian chief/superhero/wino, I live in Rome/paris/a trailer park/mansion, (bonus points if they include penis size)..I like redheads ..I was wondering if you wanted to chat?

its like a mass emailed personal ad from 2000.


Edit:
Is it the lunar phases doing this today???
I was warned me about the messages...first few days, not so bad...today??? weirdness...especially chicks.

I've browsed some bi-threads but havent posted anything about that at all...

so where did this one come from:
Hi are you into females? My daddy is looking for a second sub and a playmate for me. Would you be interested? This would be a long term thing

her profile says something like she is owned by so and so so dont even THINK of trying to talk to her...huh?

then i looked at her posts and something about knowing her owner for the last three weeks....a long term thing???
If you think that's bad, be happy you aren't a redheaded nurse. I wonder how much they'd fantasize about me if I start an IV on them?
__________________
My Literotica Submissions

Gentlemen may prefer blondes, but it takes a real man to handle a redhead.


I came to Literotica for the Eros. I stay for the Agape (LakeSailer_MI, 2013).
  Reply With Quote

Old 07-27-2013, 09:03 PM   #2074
UCanBLeafinMe
Crabby
 
UCanBLeafinMe's Avatar
 
UCanBLeafinMe is offline
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Somewhere in NY, near Albany
Posts: 2,125
Quote:
Originally Posted by BeachMomma View Post
If you think that's bad, be happy you aren't a redheaded nurse. I wonder how much they'd fantasize about me if I start an IV on them?
Redhead? Nurse?
I wonder if I can get in on the "Pr0n" fantasy, ship a PM off to you
__________________
Why yes, I am a bitch! Deal with it!
  Reply With Quote

Old 07-28-2013, 10:25 PM   #2075
BeachMomma
Sweet n Innocent
 
BeachMomma's Avatar
 
BeachMomma is offline
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: In your wildest dreams
Posts: 3,974
Was this you?

Quote:
Originally Posted by BeachMomma
Quote:
Originally Posted by *name removed*
I am a *age removed* yr old male, 6'2 200 pounds, abs, blonde hair and blue eyes. The other night I was jerking off and as I was about to cum I heard my door open. It was instinct to turn and I accidently came all over my moms tank. Idk what to do. Any advice?
Actually, yes, I do have advice.

Get a job. Get your own place. Problem solved.
__________________
My Literotica Submissions

Gentlemen may prefer blondes, but it takes a real man to handle a redhead.


I came to Literotica for the Eros. I stay for the Agape (LakeSailer_MI, 2013).
  Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump



All times are GMT -4. The time now is 11:33 PM.

Copyright 1998-2013 Literotica Online. Literotica is a registered trademark.