Old 01-29-2013, 05:38 PM   #1051
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Originally Posted by MsQuote View Post
From the files of "Just When You Thought You'd Seen It All"

I've decided there are worse things than poor spelling and grammar. I had a PM today in which the writer addressed me by another name.

I couldn't resist. I replied, "You might want to consider calling someone by their correct screen name if you want a response."

I swear to God, I shit you not. This is the reply I got in return: "Oops. Sorry. Well, thanks for responding despite an incorrect name. Are you interested in talking still?"

I guess I really should give him extra points for tenacity, but I'm not particularly feeling all that generous at the moment. Before somebody gives me shit about losing my cool, I'm actually laughing at the whole thing. (Sorry, that's in reference to another thread. lol) But I swear, honestly, how ridiculous can one person get?

Fate, scratch that; I did not just ask that question. I didn't mean it as a dare or a challenge, so please don't think you have to show me just how ridiculous people can get.

*shaking my head in amazement and amusement*
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Old 01-29-2013, 10:10 PM   #1052
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Originally Posted by BeachMomma View Post
From the files of "Just When You Thought You'd Seen It All"

I've decided there are worse things than poor spelling and grammar. I had a PM today in which the writer addressed me by another name.

I couldn't resist. I replied, "You might want to consider calling someone by their correct screen name if you want a response."

I swear to God, I shit you not. This is the reply I got in return: "Oops. Sorry. Well, thanks for responding despite an incorrect name. Are you interested in talking still?"

I guess I really should give him extra points for tenacity, but I'm not particularly feeling all that generous at the moment. Before somebody gives me shit about losing my cool, I'm actually laughing at the whole thing. (Sorry, that's in reference to another thread. lol) But I swear, honestly, how ridiculous can one person get?

Fate, scratch that; I did not just ask that question. I didn't mean it as a dare or a challenge, so please don't think you have to show me just how ridiculous people can get.

*shaking my head in amazement and amusement*
Well played on the player!
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Old 01-29-2013, 10:55 PM   #1053
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I got this gem today.....

Quote:
Originally Posted by xxx

So you don't need instructions for eating cum Babe? I would love to see you doing that, most especially if it were my load.

I have been requesting that women on Lit send me pictures of themselves for my jack-off collection. Love to have some from you to enjoy.

I'm just a horny 58yo guy who recently got busted by this wife for fucking a 29 yo, so now I'm (sadly) back to jacking-off for sweet relief.

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Old 01-29-2013, 11:18 PM   #1054
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Originally Posted by Edensgarden View Post
I got this gem today.....
Oh, brother.

How many pictures did you send??
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Old 01-30-2013, 12:21 AM   #1055
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Originally Posted by Edensgarden View Post
I got this gem today.....
Am I the only one who wants to respond and ask if this strategy has been working for him?

[laughs]

Can't help it, I am curious.
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Old 01-30-2013, 07:33 AM   #1056
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Originally Posted by blulilacgrl View Post
Am I the only one who wants to respond and ask if this strategy has been working for him?

[laughs]

Can't help it, I am curious.
Wouldn't it be hilarious if, unbeknownst to him, his wife is also a Litster - and he accidentally sends the same PM to her?
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Old 01-30-2013, 07:59 AM   #1057
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oh..my. How did I not know about
this thread??? This could be better than the blurt thread for me..
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Old 01-30-2013, 08:31 AM   #1058
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I keep getting PM's from a bloke claiming to be an english professor. Going by the grammar and punctuation, I think not!
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Old 01-30-2013, 08:34 AM   #1059
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Originally Posted by Sweetdaisymae View Post
I keep getting PM's from a bloke claiming to be an english professor. Going by the grammar and punctuation, I think not!
A play on words, perhaps? Maybe he thinks English professor is a nice way to say he professes to be English?

Nah. That requires wit.
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Old 01-30-2013, 10:04 AM   #1060
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JoyDyan View Post
Oh, brother.

How many pictures did you send??
Quote:
Originally Posted by blulilacgrl View Post
Am I the only one who wants to respond and ask if this strategy has been working for him?

[laughs]

Can't help it, I am curious.
Quote:
Originally Posted by BeachMomma View Post
Wouldn't it be hilarious if, unbeknownst to him, his wife is also a Litster - and he accidentally sends the same PM to her?

I thought it was interesting that he referred to his wife a "this wife". I wonder which number "this wife" actually is.

Maybe I should send him someone's cock pic to jizz all over.
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Old 01-30-2013, 10:13 AM   #1061
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Originally Posted by Edensgarden View Post
I thought it was interesting that he referred to his wife a "this wife". I wonder which number "this wife" actually is.

Maybe I should send him someone's cock pic to jizz all over.
It sounds like she may be his next ex-wife.
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Old 01-30-2013, 10:49 AM   #1062
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Originally Posted by RubenesqueAphrodite View Post
oh..my. How did I not know about
this thread??? This could be better than the blurt thread for me..
Oh, I'm laughing! I love the sig pic!
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Last edited by JoyDyan : 01-30-2013 at 10:56 AM.
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Old 01-30-2013, 10:59 AM   #1063
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I got a very cute, unsolicited PM this morning that actually brightened my day. To the writer, please don't think I'm outing you as an asshat, because I'm not. It was a very sweet PM.

He made a joke about the pearl necklace in my av, then asked me not to consider him an asshat. He just couldn't resist the opportunity to tease me a little.

This was one of the few unsolicited PMs that made me smile. Mr. Not-an-Asshat, thank you.
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Old 01-30-2013, 11:01 AM   #1064
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Originally Posted by Edensgarden View Post
I got this gem today.....
I have a feeling mine was from the same sender..

I;m asking the women of Lit to email me some jack-off material. Do you have any pictures of your bare ass, tits and cunt? So would love to see you spread wide and ready, and licking and sucking your titty. Ya, I know I'm a dirty guy, but what can I say.
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Old 01-30-2013, 11:02 AM   #1065
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Originally Posted by BeachMomma View Post
I got a very cute, unsolicited PM this morning that actually brightened my day. To the writer, please don't think I'm outing you as an asshat, because I'm not. It was a very sweet PM.

He made a joke about the pearl necklace in my av, then asked me not to consider him an asshat. He just couldn't resist the opportunity to tease me a little.

This was one of the few unsolicited PMs that made me smile. Mr. Not-an-Asshat, thank you.
I got one yesterday in the same vein - nice to know that somebody is paying attention!
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Old 01-30-2013, 11:19 AM   #1066
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Originally Posted by BeachMomma View Post
That's a highly technical term - it's more than a shit-ton but less than a gazillion.
I do not like that it was a metric fuck-ton. I'll take the queen's measurements thank you very much. None of this metric bullshit. My water boils at 212, not 100. My water freezes at 32, not 0. My cock weighs one stone, not 6kg. Makes far more sense than that metric bullshit.

I'll take things in the Queen's FuckTon. None of this voodoo metric shit.
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Old 01-30-2013, 11:22 AM   #1067
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Originally Posted by Edensgarden View Post
I got this gem today.....
That is a classy request. I'll bet you felt special. I mean, he got caught so he wants to jack off to YOU? Be still my heart.
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Old 01-30-2013, 11:27 AM   #1068
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I do not like that it was a metric fuck-ton. I'll take the queen's measurements thank you very much. None of this metric bullshit. My water boils at 212, not 100. My water freezes at 32, not 0. My cock weighs one stone, not 6kg. Makes far more sense than that metric bullshit.

I'll take things in the Queen's FuckTon. None of this voodoo metric shit.
I speak metric and standard measurements equally well. I can look at a container of liquid and tell you within 10 mLs how much is there. So don't try to tell me you cum a gallon; I will know for a fact that it's more like 15mLs.

Think of it like this: in standard measurement, you might have a 6" cock, but in the metric system, it's a 15cm cock. Which sounds better?
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Old 01-30-2013, 01:53 PM   #1069
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Asshat repellent ...

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Old 01-30-2013, 02:25 PM   #1070
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I speak metric and standard measurements equally well. I can look at a container of liquid and tell you within 10 mLs how much is there. So don't try to tell me you cum a gallon; I will know for a fact that it's more like 15mLs.

Think of it like this: in standard measurement, you might have a 6" cock, but in the metric system, it's a 15cm cock. Which sounds better?
My cock is measure in meters, silly.
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Old 01-30-2013, 04:37 PM   #1071
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Oh, I'm laughing! I love the sig pic!
LOL, SOOOOO Glad I could make you laugh, my dear. And for all the asshats, YES THAT IS MY ASS... purty, huh?

Love the crackle effect I got with the art program, too
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Old 01-30-2013, 06:11 PM   #1072
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I want to thank all of you for inspiring me to write this how-to blog post for the asshats ... even though most of them don't know they're asshats.

Advice for the Guys: Chatting it up with the Ladies
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Old 01-30-2013, 06:18 PM   #1073
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I want to thank all of you for inspiring me to write this how-to blog post for the asshats ... even though most of them don't know they're asshats.

Advice for the Guys: Chatting it up with the Ladies
don’t send a dick pic
*snort*
That's awesome, MsQuote!!
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Old 01-30-2013, 06:47 PM   #1074
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Originally Posted by JoyDyan View Post
don’t send a dick pic
*snort*
That's awesome, MsQuote!!
Thanks.

I'll never understand why some men send dick picks. I've never known a single woman who gets turned on by them. Haven't these asshats gotten the memo?
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Old 01-30-2013, 07:13 PM   #1075
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Well, I'M not going to tell him how offensive his sig line is....but ewwww!

Whew, just had to get that off my chest. I don't even need a PM to know he's an asshat!!
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