Old 12-01-2012, 06:42 PM   #501
Cipher
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FakeaSmile View Post
But....but isn't that what all the women are here for
Some guys just do not 'get it' Tis sad really!!

I've been having to let some of these pervs (one imparticular) that swears all women are here to serve him, and please him..Pfft

The stuff that comes out of his mouth is nauseating & idiotic.

I've had to turn my pm's off..

But in short, i agree FakeaSmile, "Some guys just don't get it"..
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Old 12-01-2012, 06:49 PM   #502
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Quote:
Originally Posted by satindesire View Post
There. Fixed that for ya.
Hahahaha! Love it! Thank you!

*still laughing ... hard*
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Old 12-01-2012, 06:51 PM   #503
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cipher View Post
I've been having to let some of these pervs (one imparticular) that swears all women are here to serve him, and please him..Pfft

The stuff that comes out of his mouth is nauseating & idiotic.

I've had to turn my pm's off..

But in short, i agree FakeaSmile, "Some guys just don't get it"..
He believes that because no woman will give him the time of day in person.
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Old 12-01-2012, 06:54 PM   #504
BonBon1976
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LikeASnowflake View Post
I usually don't post in here but dang...

[Ok something to get you in the hot drippy erotic mood.
Baby pick up the phone and just let your thoughts roam...

Tell me all that you want me to know...in pleasing that body of
yours...

You've got a sexy way of touching me...

And I help but get lost in you...

Relax your mind as I relax mine...

Just to hear the sweetness in your voice sends a chill of passion...

Through this body.

I know you're lying in bed wishing I was there...

So tell me baby all that I need to hear...

You've got me in a horny frenzy state of mind...

So bad that you make me want get undressed and tell you how

Hard this man is getting for you...

"I Want To Hear Your Voice"

As you relax at the sound of my voice starting to whisper

Those naughty words of what I long to do with you...

As you lie there thinking of my hard shaft getting so damn hard for
you...

You've got me wishing I was there to see you undressed

With your body exposed as your hands start roam to those sensitive
parts

That makes your body yearn to be made love to you...

I hear your soft moans getting ever so loud in my ear...

As you tell you me how hard your nipples...are getting

From the excitement your body feels...

"I Want To Hear Your Voice"

As you tell me that you're playing with your nipples...

And I tell you how bad I want to taste you...and feel those nipples

Getting so damn erect as I gently want to suck on them...

I would give anything to see you start to play with your fur mound

Of love as you feel just how wet your getting from the words that
flow

From me in how bad my tongue wants to taste of your wetness...

As I would get lost in a trance as you slide those soft finger-tips
deep inside of you...

Soaking them with your wetness...begging me to taste and lick of them...

As I hear soft moans escape your lips...

I would begin to tell you how bad I want to fuck you ever so
passionately...

As you get lost in thoughts of my shaft sliding deeply inside of you...

Feeling your warm wetness soak the veins of my love tool...

"I Want To Hear Your Voice"

As you moan from those very thoughts...and get wetter and wetter of

Wanting me...

Craving me...

Needing me...

I can tell by your relaxed voice that you're feeling' how bad

I want you as well...

Mmmmm! My hard shaft buried deep within' your warm wet walls of your
love nest...

I would tell you how fucking hard you have me...in lustful desires of
wanting you...

How badly my lips yearn to taste of your sweet pussy lips...as my
tongue

Draws lovely circles around your swollen...clit...

I can only imagine your soft fingers working your clit in a hot
frenzy...

As you get lost in thought of my tongue having its way with your
body...

Your hips lifting my chin up and down as your juices...drips on my
tongue...

I hear you scream my name begging me to...

Fuck you...

Rock with you...

"I Want To Hear Your Voice"

Moan with so much pleasure...as you get ever so close to Cumming by
the sound of my voice...softly whispering in your ear...

You telling me to rock with you as you arch your back...

Imagining my shaft being soaked with your juices as you would wrap
your thighs

Around my hips locking me in place...thrusting harder against me
feeling our hips slap hard against each other...

I want to hear you tell me how close to Cumming you are as your soft
moans ring louder in my ear from the pleasures that your body is
calling out to me...

For I want to make sure that your body is pleased in every way you
lust for...

In those sexy moments that we share...

"I want to hear Your Voice"

Scream out of control as your body trembles and explodes in ways

You desire in knowing that you're making me want to explode with you...

And once I hear you let go and just give into exploding...

I want to hear your voice tell me just how damn good it felt to know
that your body can explode...when I want to hear your voice...

Telling me to cum for you as you cum for me....

Damn "I Want To Hear Your Voice"
I am a very lean muscular guy, love erotic conversation, stimulating hot women who desire steamy erotic talk and sex. Love to go all out pleasing woman in bed and here.
I would love to do audio with you via skype.
Let me know if you like audio, skype audio, or yahoo, or im or PM here. I would love to get to know you here sexaully and personally as well. I am single would love to walk on the erotic fantasy side that you may have. Lets get to know each other enjoy our company, stimulating conversation and more. I am fun, humorous, well educated and sensually wired.
****
skype for audio chat or im chat my address is

**** on skype.

***

I'm not offended or anything. But that's like the longest PM I ever got and all that for some cyber sex.[/quote]

LMAO ... seriously I can barely type ... I got the same thing today from the same guy (I am sure) ... how droll. Can't even type up new cyber smut for different girls LOL ha ha ha Not offended either just bored
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Old 12-01-2012, 07:11 PM   #505
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Originally Posted by MsQuote View Post
He believes that because no woman will give him the time of day in person.

Hear, hear!
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Old 12-01-2012, 10:47 PM   #506
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ah good, it finally happened, josh finally owned up to being a complete fucking waste of time. i knew it was just a matter of time.

Quote:
123josh quoth:
if you got 0 PMs you'd be upset. many girls appreciate a happy hello once and awhile!
how in the fuck would you know, given your crappy-assed-as-fuck ratio of sent msgs vs responses?

Quote:
123josh quoth:
it's the 1 out of 10 times you don't get shot down that matters!!
excellent, thank you for guaranteeing that your missives make appearances in this thread!

ed
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Old 12-01-2012, 11:03 PM   #507
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Here's another Wall of Text, titled "Hi Sexy Lady".

Quote:
You drive home from work, already the skies are darkening, filling with storm clouds. As you pull into the drive you notice that my car is there, already home and waiting on you. Coming up the path, you notice that no lights seem to be on and wonder if there is another power outage. But, as you open the door, you see many candles lit, and leading a path down the hall to our room, and with the hardwood floor covered with petals from tulips of every color, making this entryway a path to remember that's for sure. Taking off your shoes and walking through the tulips, while smelling the sweet scent of the cool water candles we purchased together because we loved the scent.

Coming up to the door of our room, you hear soft music playing, and slowly open the door. You find me laying there on the bed, freshly showered and shaved, in my silk robe you bought for me. You look around the room, astonished by the number of candles and tulips spread throughout, making a warm and special place for just the two of us. I look up just in time to hear you gasp at the sight of what is laid before you. I walk up to you, 'baby, tonight is just about us" I say as I look deep into those beautiful eyes that only begin to describe your beauty.

Wrapping my arms around you, feeling your heart race as you anticipate what is to come of this evening. Running my fingers through your hair, softly caressing your soft cheeks, pulling you in close to me, so close, I can feel the warmth of your breath on my skin. It has been so long, and I just want it to be us, be able to pamper and love you tonight in the way I know how. Go slip into something more comfortable. You head into the bathroom, as I now wait for you to come on out, so ready for you baby.

You throw open the door, and believe me, it was worth the entire wait as I feel my pulse start to race. Seeing you in the black silk robe, with that sexy zebra striped bra and black lace bikini panties, be still my heart, before I race over and devour you. I slowly walk up to you, admiring your heavenly beauty, looking into your eyes once more, I could get lost here forever. I pick you up gently in my arms, holding you so close, forgetting the world around us if only but for a moment. I lay you down on the bad made for us, running my fingers through your silky hair, still looking into your eyes, lowering my head to yours, as you grasp my neck.

Our lips so close, pecking, kissing ever so gently, nibbling on your lips, savoring your taste, oh how much I want you right now. Our hands start roaming each others bodies, as you rub my chest and my hands work their way down your neck, as our kissing becomes more urgent. I can feel your breath quicken, see the passion building in your eyes, feel the heat from your skin, oh baby... we don't need to rush, we have all night, as I reach over and pull a bottle of lavender oil I have been heating in some water. I want to pamper you a while first. As you recall I have been taking a class in massage and aromatherapy, and you will be my first and only woman to feel my new techniques. Turn over..

I gently slide the silk robe down your back as you lay there on your stomach, revealing your soft skin of your back and what your bikini lacks to hide with those ever so sexy legs. I pull off my robe and sit beside you on the bed in my boxers, grabbing the bottle of oil, ready for your massage. I start by moving the hair off your neck and pouring the arm oil over your neck and shoulders. The oil has a soothing affect with the warmth and scent or this lavender. I gently place my hands on your neck, slowly rubbing the oil into your soft skin, as I knead and massage tenderly. Caressing your shoulders as you moan out, enjoying every moment my hands work the oil into your sensual skin. Moving lower I unclasp your bra, not needing this any longer, and pull it off as you rise up off the bed to allow me to do so. But doing so allows me to see just a glimpse of the sides of your sensual breasts, and you already have me going.

I pour more oil down your spine, and over your back, the heat soothing as I spread it over your shoulder blades and down your spine. As I spread the oil and massage into your skin, some trickles over the sides of your body, over your sides of your stomach and breasts, making you tingle even more. Slowly I massage down your spine, putting pressure in just the right places to soothe and relax you. My hands roam all over your back, leaving no skin untouched. My fingers trail over the sides of your tummy, hands working up over the sides of your breasts, massaging, you let out a moan. I can tease, but will definitely please in time.

I move my hands to just above your panty line, moving my fingers just under the hem. I have to remove them down a bit. I slide your panties down just enough to reveal your upper buttocks, so sexy, allowing me access to your lower back and upper bum. I pour more oil, spreading it over your lower back, rubbing it in, and over your sensual upper butt, making me want you even more. The oil slides between your cheeks and down your crack, tingling and making you want more. You spread your legs ever so much and the warm oil trickles lower and lower, as if your panties weren't already damp. I massage lower, over your whole buttocks, under your panties, cupping you so sexy butt, making you squirm in anticipation of more. How can I resist just ripping off your panties now?

But I do, still a tease, but certainly going to please. I move down to your feet, pouring oil over your feet and calves, working my fingers into your skin, soothing your aching feet, your toes, your ankles. Working my hands up your calves, putting pressure just enough to soothe while my hands work wonders on your lower legs. I pour more oil over your thighs, and the back of your knees, caressing up over your knees, massaging into your thighs, getting higher and higher up your legs. I brush my hands so close to your panties, you can feel as my fingertips massage in between your thighs as you spread your legs more for better access. I decide to take down your panties, now soaked from so close to teasing, pulling them gently down over your feet and off. I reveal all of your sensual ass, looking up in between your legs realizing you are already wet. Moving my hands up your thighs once again, so close to your pussy lips, you feel the warmth of my fingers, so close, teasing you as I just brush past your clit, oh baby, making your quiver.

You turn over, look at me with a passion in your eyes, relax baby, I'm not done, wink. I remove my boxers, revealing how mush this teasing is actually having an affect on me as well. I lay you back down on your back, telling you to relax as I see the fire in your eyes. I pour oil over your neck, and upper chest, moving my hands to spread the oil, massaging into your neck. I massage deeper as I lower my lips and start kissing your cheeks, your ears, nibbling, as my hands work lower. I spread more oil over your sensual breasts, oh my god you are sexy, massaging all around but not touching your nipples, as my lips nibble and suck at your neck. You tilt your head back, loving every touch, every kiss, every nibble I have to offer.

My fingertips gently flick over your erect nipples, making you jump and moan out. I slowly circle my fingertips over your nipples, as my lips suck, kiss, and nibble down your neck, getting closer and closer. Its amazing how turned on I can make you with just flicks of my tongue and wisps of my fingertips. I lower my lips to your nipples, blowing cool air over them, making you tingle even more before I take each one in my mouth and suck on them. I hear you moan out as my hands cup and massage your breasts, licking, sucking, nipples so hard in my mouth as I myself am so hard for you. Working my hands and lips down lower, you bite your lip and spread your legs, wanting me to pleasure her more than anything right now.

My lips moving lower and my fingers massage your sexy thighs, lower and lower, seeing you arch your back, just wanting your hot clit to be touched. I spread your lips with my fingertips, revealing how wet you truly are, and blow several cool breaths over your hot clit, sending you over the edge as you moan out. I gently flick my tongue over your clit, I hear you scream out as my tongue works over your erect clit, sucking, licking, and making you wet. My tongue slides up and down your pussy so slowly, you feel every moment of pleasure as I slide my tongue, a little faster with every lick. You place your legs over my shoulders, not wanting my tongue to go anywhere as my rhythm matches yours. My tongue darts in and out of your hot pussy, coating my lips with your warm pussy juices, diving right in and wanting you to orgasm over and over. I lick faster, up and down your hot pussy, nibbling on your clit, moving my fingers over your pussy as you grind your hips into my face.

I place two fingers inside your wet pussy, as my lips suck hard on your clit. My fingers arch up to reach your g-spot, making your scream out as you start to grind harder and harder against my fingers and lips. Faster and faster, my tongue licks up and down, spreading your pussy lips with my tongue, my fingers deep within your wet pussy, reaching your g-spot with every thrust, sending you over the edge over and over. Feeling your legs shake, as your thighs grasp hard against my head, still licking and sucking till you go limp, your orgasm passed and I licked up all your sensual juices, oh baby, mmmmm...

You look down at me and I think I am in trouble now, I see a fire in your eyes and a passion that hasn't been awakened in a while. You tell me it's my turn, throwing me on the bed on my back. You straddle my hips, teasing my so hard cock with your wet pussy, asking me what it feels like to be teased, I love it. You reach down, stroking my hard cock, rubbing over your clit, asking me to beg me to fuck you. I don't beg, usually, but with your hands on my hard cock, teasing me by slowly placing just the tip inside you hot wet pussy, I have to have you, and now. I scream out, baby, you know I want you more than anything, make me yours. You give me that look, that devilish look, like you are going to have fun with this, you are in control now.

Slowly sliding your wet pussy down my hard shaft, feeling every inch enveloped deep within you, omg it feels so good. You rock your hips slowly allowing my so hard cock to slide in and out. I look up at you, your eyes filled with fire, so sexy in this position of domination. I reach up and caress your sensual breasts, nipples so hard, looking up into your eyes, as you rock back and forth and I thrust up to meet you. You start your rhythm just a bit faster, coating my hard cock with your pussy juices, taking it almost all the way out and thrusting back down again. I grab your sexy ass, guiding it faster and faster on me, trying to control but losing control every time you thrust down on me hard.

Of course, I can see this is also pleasing you, you throw your head back as you really start to ride me faster and faster. My cock thrusting deep and hard, reaching your g-spot and you scream out as you arch back so far. Then you throw yourself down on top of me, our lips lock, kissing, nibbling, passionate feverish kissing. My hands still guiding your sexy pussy down on my hard cock faster and faster, you bite my lip hard ready for yet another orgasm. I can feel your pussy muscles clench over my hard cock, and your hot cum drenches down me. Harder and harder, faster and faster, thrusting down on may hard cock as we passionately kiss and bite, grabbing your hair as I feel you explode on top of me, cum dripping, mmmmmm...

Now it's my turn to be in control. Still hard for you and you not wanting it to end, you slide off of me and get in the doggie position. I so love looking at your sexy ass this way, gently rubbing my fingers up and down your sweet ass, feeling your wet pussy and asking you if you want more. I get up behind you, my hard cock at full attention of your dripping hot pussy, slowly sliding it up and down over your hot clit, you start to scream out, your clit so sensitive. I allow the head of my hard cock just to penetrate enough to make you want more, then thrust in hard and fast making you scream out once again.

Slowly we get into a rhythm again, thrusting in deep with every stroke, your head in a pillow moaning deeper and deeper. I grab your so sexy ass and guide my cock deeper into your hot pussy. I feel your hot cum dripping down with every thrust. Faster and faster, screaming out, harder and harder, our bodies meshing together as one as you grip the pillows hard, screaming out my name with every thrust. I reach down and move my fingers over your clit, sending you ever the edge once more, your tight pussy muscles clenching my hard cock, trying to send me over the edge, so wanting to cum deep inside you. So sexy, so hot, you thrust back on my hard cock, making me penetrate deeper and deeper and this time it's me who screams out. Slamming back harder and harder, making my cock throb and your pussy muscles tighten, I can feel your orgasm coming on and I'm going to release.

You look back at me, with passion and fire in your eyes, begging me to cum now, cum hard deep within you, and this sends me over the edge. I feel your pussy muscles tighten once again as my cock releases its hot cum deep within your pussy. You feel every throb of my hard cock deep within you, feel every drop of my cum fill you up, feel my knees buckle as you bring me to ultimate orgasm. We fall onto the bed together, having spent these last few hours pleasing and teasing one another, feeling the passion of making love with one another. I hold you in my arms, cum dripping down our legs but not caring, looking deep into your eyes again, the fire subsided, but the passion still there. Moving our lips to each other, kissing ever so gently, as I run my fingers through your now wet hair, baby, did you like the massage?

I would love to get to know you sexy sweet lady. L
Lets be naughty here together some time. I love to flirt and tease. I promise you make you blush and smile, I hope I stimulate your erotic side.
PM me lets start a great friendship and have fun at the same time.
[Name removed]
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Old 12-01-2012, 11:08 PM   #508
MsQuote
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Quote:
Originally Posted by silverwhisper View Post
ah good, it finally happened, josh finally owned up to being a complete fucking waste of time. i knew it was just a matter of time.


how in the fuck would you know, given your crappy-assed-as-fuck ratio of sent msgs vs responses?


excellent, thank you for guaranteeing that your missives make appearances in this thread!

ed
Are you sure there wasn't a typo? I would assume 10 should really be 100.

I don't take that as Josh owning up to his asshattery. More like believing his own delusions.
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Old 12-01-2012, 11:18 PM   #509
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GrrlFriday View Post
Here's another Wall of Text, titled "Hi Sexy Lady".
I bet that made you feel really special knowing he cuts and pastes that story to every woman he PM's.
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Old 12-02-2012, 12:03 AM   #510
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Asshat of the week:

Quote:
Originally Posted by AsshatOfTheWeek
Wonderful website! Mind if I ask how many fingers fit inside your pussy?
Thank you and yumm!
Xxxxxx
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Old 12-02-2012, 01:49 AM   #511
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MsQuote View Post
Asshat of the week:
Say:

Zero....

...of yours.
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Old 12-02-2012, 03:25 AM   #512
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I just got this gem from some nut. Read on at your own peril.
I want you to pay attention to each word...
I want you to believe that every word is true...
Pay attention to each line as you scroll down...
Pay attention to every detail as you read slowly...
You find that each word pulls you in more, and each line pulls your
attention to only these words...
I want you to just sit back and relax...
Look at my words and listen to them carefully...
You will begin to feel yourself breathing easier...
Relaxing and breathing in deeply...
In and out...
Breathing softly in...
And breathing softly out...
You will find it easier to just sit back and relax...
You find yourself drifting into a peaceful place, where sand there
lying with you, and the waves of the ocean are close by...
You can hear he waves now as you drift away...
You feel your body relaxing more and more with each word...
As you scroll down, your body sinks down with each little scrolling
drag...
You'll become sleepier and sleepier...
As you scroll down, you find your body sinking into the warm sand beneath you...
As you hear the crashing waves against the beach, you feel your mind
being washed away with the currents, being taken out to sea...
As you lay there on the beach, the warm sand carressed your back and shoulders. Your legs, ankles, hands, neck, and head all are being
massaged by this magical sand...
The cool air blows across your body, giving you the feeling of total bliss as you relax further and further now...
Relaxing now on the beach as the warm sand takes your body slowly...
Relaxing now as the waves take your mind, which only wishes to read on...
You want to keep reading...
Bliss overflowing your mind and body...
The beach's sand so relaxing and warm....
The beach's air so crisp, so soothing...
The beach's waves so calming as they crash softly into the beach itself...
Become sleepier and sleepier...
Each word sending you deeper and deeper into that bliss you love so much...
Total relaxation...
Total bliss...
Must keep reading...
It's so hard to think as you lay there...
So hard to think as the waves take your thoughts away...
You only want to read on...
You only want to keep scrolling...
Keep reading...
Become sleepier and sleepier...
Keep sinking deeper into bliss...
You want to be hynotized here on the beach...
You want to lay in the sand and be hypnotized here...
You want to hear he waves hypnotizing your mind here...
You want to feel the breeze relax your body here...
You want to sleep...
You want to be relaxed...
You find that your muscles are relaxing...
That your every muscle is becoming loose and fully relaxed...
You find that your mind is growing darker and darker...
Your mind is going blank...
You find that every single word that you read here is true...
Every single word relaxing you as you lay on the beach...
Every single word taking away your thoughts...
Leaving you without cares as you lay on the beach...
Without worries...
Without thoughts...
Without anything but concentration...
You can't stop reading...
Your eyes won't look away...
Your eyes are locked on my words...
You only want to keep reading now...
You feel it...
You know it's true...
You can feel everything that you read happening to you...
You know that your feet are fully relaxing now...
You know that your ankles are fully relaxing now...
You know that your lower legs are fully relaxing now...
You know that your knees are fully relaxing now...
You know that your thighs are fully relaxing now...
You know that your waist is fully relaxing now...
You know that your stomach is fully relaxing now...
You know that your back is fully relaxing now...
You know that your chest is fully relaxing now...
You know that your shoulders are fully relaxing now...
You know that your elbows are fully relaxing now...
You know that your arms are fully relaxing now...
You know that your hands are fully relaxing now...
You know that your neck is fully relaxing now...
You know that your mind is fully empty now...
You want to keep reading...
Bliss overflowing your mind and body...
Happiness overtaking you as you are becoming hypnotized...
You keep scrolling because you want to be hypnotized...
You need to be hypnotized...
You desire to be hypnotized...
You feel your body relaxing so much...
You feel as if you need to fall into a deep hypnotized sleep...
You need the hypnosis...
You need to sleep...
Sleepier and sleepier...
Become sleepier and sleepier...
Each word sending you deeper and deeper into that bliss you love so much...
Total relaxation...
Total bliss...
Must keep reading...
It's so hard to think as you lay there...
So hard to think as the waves take your thoughts away...
You only want to read on...
You only want to keep scrolling...
Keep reading...
Become sleepier and sleepier...
Keep sinking deeper into bliss...
You want to be hynotized...
You NEED to be hypnotized...
Say it...
You want to be hypnotized...
Become sleepier and sleepier...
Now your eyes start to see these words in front of a spiral...
A black and white spiral hangs in front of your eyes...
As you look at my words, the spiral is taking your mind from your
head...
My spiral is taking your mind and body as you relax more and more...
Become sleepier and sleepier...
The spiral is spinning and as it spins, you find it so difficult to
look away...
You don't want to stop...
You need to keep reading...
Need the spiral...
Become sleepier and sleepier...

The spiral has your mind now...
You see it spinning and you can only watch...
Powerless to look away...
Become sleepier and sleepier...
You feel the spiral's might now...
The words are now taking you fully...
You relax so much...
You feel so sleepy...
Become sleepier and sleepier...
The spiral is taking all your thoughts...
No thought remain...
You are without your thoughts...
Simply reading the words...
Simply listening to the words...
As you get so sleepy...
Become sleepier and sleepier...
So needy of the words...
So deeply hypnotized...
Yes, you want to be hypnotized now...
You need to be hypnotized now...
The spiral holds your mind now...
Become sleepier and sleepier...
Whisper yes with what you agree...
You love this feeling...
You must read...
You must follow my every word...
You want to keep reading...
You need to keep reading...
You want to go deeper...
You want to be hypnotized now...
We will count down from 10 as you read my numbers...
And I will count with you as you read the numbers, you will go deep
into my total hypnotic bliss...
When we reach 0, you will be fully hypnotized and listen to my words
as you only wish to keep reading them...
You will keep reading as you are totally under now...
Now being hypnotized fully now...
10 Needing my words...
9 Wanting to obey my every word...
8 Loving my words...
7 Hoping to read more of the blissful words...
6 Deeper into the bliss my words give you...
5 Slowly getting to that bliss you need...
4 Wanting to be hypnotized by me...
3 Wishing to keep going down...
2 Further down...
1 Almost there...
0 And fully hypnotized...
Deep in my hypnotic power...
Now.... keep reading and do as my words tell you...
Listen to my every word...
Do only as my words say...
Follow my words now...
You feel total and complete obedience to my every word...
Now listen carefully...
Whenever I, Asshole type a message to you, you must read it. Whenever you read or hear my word UNICORN, you will fall into this wonderful hypnosis, just like before. UNICORN hypnotizes you more and more. The more you read or hear UNICORN, the deeper into my hypnotic spell you go. UNICORN will make the spiral in your mind appear again and send you to the beach where I hypnotized you. UNICORN will always hypnotize you and will always send you deeper into my trance. When you read or hear UNICORN, you will become hypnotized immediately, and totally. You are always happy to read or hear my word, UNICORN.

I want you to reply to me, Asshole, when you are done reading this message. You will message me saying your full name, your age, your sex, and you will type "I was hypnotized by you asshole and must obey." After you send your reply to me... you will wake from your trance completely. you will be very, very happy and want me to hypnotize you again soon.
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Old 12-02-2012, 03:41 AM   #513
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Jesus.... there are some tools out there.
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Old 12-02-2012, 09:26 AM   #514
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Originally Posted by Aurantica View Post
I want you to reply to me, Asshole, when you are done reading this message. You will message me saying your full name, your age, your sex, and you will type "I was hypnotized by you asshole and must obey." After you send your reply to me... you will wake from your trance completely. you will be very, very happy and want me to hypnotize you again soon.
ROFLMAO! I wonder how long it took him to write and how many he "hypnotized"?
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Old 12-02-2012, 12:52 PM   #515
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Originally Posted by Aurantica View Post
I just got this gem from some nut. Read on at your own peril.

<snip>

You want to be hynotized...

You NEED to be hypnotized...

Say it...

You want to be hypnotized...

<snip>
This asshat certainly assumes a lot.

The only effect that PM had on me was my eyes rolling in the back of my head.
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Old 12-02-2012, 12:56 PM   #516
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Originally Posted by Aurantica View Post
I just got this gem from some nut. Read on at your own peril.
I want you to pay attention to each word...
You NEED to be hypnotized...

Say it...

You want to be hypnotized...

Become sleepier and sleepier...
He sure as hell hypnotized me, but not in the way he intended.
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Old 12-02-2012, 01:25 PM   #517
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So I got an interesting PM the other day. It was different from most asshat PMs in that he'd obviously read something I wrote on another thread. He was merely commenting on it, and he seemed really nice and sincere in the PM. There was nothing in the PM that set my warning bells off.

I have a rule of thumb regarding unsolicited PMs from people I don't already know. If they have 0 posts, that's an automatic delete. If they have any posts at all, I go back to read what they've said in the forums. That's what did him in. Most of his posts were perving picture threads, asking for people to IM/Skype/chat with him, or other things along those lines.

No response. Delete. God, I love that delete button.
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Old 12-02-2012, 01:28 PM   #518
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Originally Posted by MsQuote View Post
He believes that because no woman will give him the time of day in person.

LoL Exactly!

The sad part is, Some of these women on here, i've seen fall head over heels for him..*Throwing up*
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Old 12-02-2012, 01:31 PM   #519
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Jesus.... there are some tools out there.
Off topic sry - but where did you get the signature emocons?
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Old 12-02-2012, 01:33 PM   #520
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I just got this gem from some nut. Read on at your own peril.


Not only did he just advertise he's a complete whack job, he advertised he clearly doesn't have a life LMFAO

Just wow..
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Old 12-02-2012, 01:37 PM   #521
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I have a rule of thumb regarding unsolicited PMs from people I don't already know. If they have 0 posts, that's an automatic delete. If they have any posts at all, I go back to read what they've said in the forums.
I guess that's where I screw up as I usually answer every PM with something. I should use you're rule because I am tired of "I want to lick you ass" fifty times a day. I should delete my avatar too I guess. I hate creeps!
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Old 12-02-2012, 01:45 PM   #522
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Originally Posted by BeachMomma View Post
So I got an interesting PM the other day. It was different from most asshat PMs in that he'd obviously read something I wrote on another thread. He was merely commenting on it, and he seemed really nice and sincere in the PM. There was nothing in the PM that set my warning bells off.

I have a rule of thumb regarding unsolicited PMs from people I don't already know. If they have 0 posts, that's an automatic delete. If they have any posts at all, I go back to read what they've said in the forums. That's what did him in. Most of his posts were perving picture threads, asking for people to IM/Skype/chat with him, or other things along those lines.

No response. Delete. God, I love that delete button.
I do exactly the same but some guys obviously don't realise that most women will look at his profile and back posts. Men forget that most women don't fall apart when they try to feed them smooth lines. It comes over more as a warning sign of 'Uh oh douchebag alert'. Whereas being youself not trying to impress being upfront works so much better.
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Old 12-02-2012, 02:24 PM   #523
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I guess that's where I screw up as I usually answer every PM with something. I should use you're rule because I am tired of "I want to lick you ass" fifty times a day. I should delete my avatar too I guess. I hate creeps!
I almost never answer unsolicited PMs from people I don't know on the board. A few times I've answered them and lived to regret it. A VERY few, I've answered and went on to develop a friendship with them. Those are the exceptions rather than the rule.

My screen name used to be "FeistyScorpio." I don't have to tell you the PMs I got then. LOL I changed my name to BeachMomma because 1) it suited me and 2) I thought it was about as asexual as I could get. Boy, was I wrong! I can now tell you every asshat on Lit who has an Oedipal complex. My answer to those people is usually something along the lines of, "I already have kids of my own. I don't want or need more." (Assuming I even bother answering them in the first place. LOL)

It's been my experience that it doesn't matter what your name is, what av you wear, or frankly, even if you're male or female. Asshats are going to hit on anything and anyone possible. My advice is to just be yourself, and your delete button is your best friend!

By the way, my answer to your ass licking friends would be, "I don't know where your tongue has been. I don't want that nasty thing touching my ass or any other part of me."

Quote:
Originally Posted by FakeaSmile View Post
I do exactly the same but some guys obviously don't realise that most women will look at his profile and back posts. Men forget that most women don't fall apart when they try to feed them smooth lines. It comes over more as a warning sign of 'Uh oh douchebag alert'. Whereas being youself not trying to impress being upfront works so much better.
I think they realize; they're just playing the "pussy lottery." If they send out tons of PMs, somebody will reply. They're fishing.

I agree; if I receive an unsolicited PM, I'm far more open to a nice introduction and a request to get to know me better. I'll STILL look at back posts and the profile, but that person has a far better chance of getting a reply from me.

Smooth lines may have worked when I was 20. Now, at 48, I've heard every possible line, and I've heard the bad lines too many times to count. I've heard most of them face to face. LOL I'm a redhead; do you know how many times total strangers have asked if the carpet matches the drapes? Even worse, total strangers asking if the fire burns as hot down below. If you want to get REALLY raunchy, I'm a redheaded nurse. When they start THAT shit, I realize they need a new IV, and I might have to use a vein that I know is in a tender spot. They learn pretty quickly that it's a bad idea to offend or piss off their nurse.
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Old 12-02-2012, 05:39 PM   #524
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This asshat certainly assumes a lot.

The only effect that PM had on me was my eyes rolling in the back of my head.



UNICORN.






















Just checking.
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Old 12-02-2012, 06:06 PM   #525
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UNICORN.


Just checking.
Color me crazy, but if I'm going to hypnotize somebody to do something when I say UNICORN, he'll give me his name, credit card numbers, expiration dates, and CVC numbers.
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