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Old 05-16-2010, 04:06 AM   #26
DaneCopenhagen
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tan43215 View Post
they all do sometimes in my experience - so harder then others - and some just once in a while - and some all the time -- and of coarse it must be consensual
I think your experience is somewhat like mine - that's probably what makes it so interesting...and confusing...
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Old 05-16-2010, 04:09 AM   #27
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Originally Posted by DVS View Post
Yes, it's not unusual to want this kind of sex, but by far, it isn't totally across the board with all women.

And I'm sure some would enjoy it, if they could better understand the woman within. Upbringing and socialization of the sexes has a lot to do with it. Some would enjoy it from time to time, but feel it's not right or correct. Some might enjoy it, but frown on any kind of violence in their lives, controlled or otherwise.

The different levels of experience and desire are very wide spread. The human race is full of diverse individuals and the explanations given by women as to why they'd enjoy it or wouldn't enjoy it are just as diverse and individual.
Thanks for your interesting thoughts - I'm sure upbringing and socialization is a big part of it and that experience and desire is very wide spread...we strive to understand...
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Old 05-16-2010, 04:10 AM   #28
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Originally Posted by Stella_Omega View Post
Maybe they understand the woman within very well, and that woman does not enjoy it.

My 'woman within' is a man. He likes bottoming rough. He does not like to be thought of as a submissive woman. That would just piss him off.

My GF's 'woman within' is a woman. She will take it rough from me, but never from any man.
What an interesting twist ...I'll have to think about that...
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Old 05-16-2010, 04:13 AM   #29
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Originally Posted by Netzach View Post
I've only met one man in my life who gave the forcefully-treated-sexually prospect a pass. Most people like letting the other person do the work of driving the encounter, getting them off, doing things *to* them. The fact that I enjoy doing the work as much as I do makes me a minority. The dirty secret isn't how many women like this (almost all do at some point) it's that almost all men do.
Maybe you are right - since man has started to go upright it's a common notion that the man was the provider and the woman was at home takig care of children and home, so maybe that's where it started.....
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Old 05-16-2010, 04:14 AM   #30
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rosco rathbone View Post
Once they go rough, they never go back.
You might be right - on the other hand to me it's not violence, it's a sexual play to give both pleasure, so if that is not the case I guess the play will stop...
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Old 05-16-2010, 04:16 AM   #31
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Originally Posted by midwestyankee View Post
Hence the popularity of talk-radio shows where you're invited to check your mind at the door. [/hijack]
We don't have radio shows like that in Denmark, so I'm not sure I understand what you mean, so if you could explain just a bit more...
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Old 05-16-2010, 04:17 AM   #32
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Originally Posted by bambikiller View Post
Wow what a statement.
I listen to both sides and I like to hear all the opinons.
Of course I don't agree with half thats said by eather side.

But I won't change the course of this thread.

Love that rough sex!
I'm also a bit in limbo....
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Old 05-16-2010, 04:19 AM   #33
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Originally Posted by kittyn_ View Post
Personally, I love it. Just don't expect me to be completely compliant in the process or let the guy to have all the fun.

Now, if we're talking about me with another girl, I can't get into anyone being demanding or 'in control'. I have a very defined sense of what I like with people of either gender, and the two don't overlap in many places.
Again interesting with this duality being with men or women - interesting - I would love to hear more about that....
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Old 05-16-2010, 04:20 AM   #34
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Originally Posted by msjuicypussy View Post
Absolutely. Take me.
Clear statement!
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Old 05-16-2010, 04:21 AM   #35
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Originally Posted by texan4836 View Post
DaneCopenhagen

Hope you got my PM. Let me know what you think.
I got it and read it - I'll PM you!
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Old 05-16-2010, 04:21 AM   #36
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RawHumor View Post
Sometimes a woman enjoys knowing that you're so aroused by her, that your animal side takes over. It's not so much a submissive thing as confirmation that she can turn you on to that degree.

Sometimes.

Other times, a woman's just a submissive slut and wants you to use her as a fuck toy.

I kinda like those times.
I'm both of those things... sometimes. The former more than the latter.

HOWEVER, sometimes I just like it nice and gentle.
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Old 05-16-2010, 04:22 AM   #37
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Quote:
Originally Posted by alwayslonely View Post
I like being taken forcibly... a little rough.. nice.......
Another clear statement...
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Old 05-16-2010, 04:24 AM   #38
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Quote:
Originally Posted by flasubm View Post
My wife is usually pretty conservative but when she get's in the right mood, she enjoys it rough, I can slap her around, abuse her ass and nipples and talk filthy to her. She loves having her hair pulled back while I am fucking her from behind. But this is not a regular occasion that I get to enjoy this side of her
I think we share the same experience - when do you know you have to be rough - is that something which happens during the sexact or something you decide before?
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Old 05-16-2010, 04:27 AM   #39
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mia_erotica View Post
I can't stand a submissive man. I equate it with laziness and I don't do lazy.
Fair enough, but I don't think the men here are submissive - I'm not at least, but being dominant is a role I put on, which is more difficult than just being your normal person making love to the one you love...
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Old 05-16-2010, 04:29 AM   #40
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Originally Posted by Kajira Callista View Post
Heh. Are we talking nilla forceful or BDSM forceful?
I'm not sure I understand the term 'nilla' - but it's not BDSM forceful in the sense I talk about it...
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Old 05-16-2010, 04:31 AM   #41
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Originally Posted by DeepGreenEyes View Post
So... I should tell my submissive that she's a lazy-assed bitch when she behaves submissively?



I think we'll have to tune in next week for another exciting episode.



Do it. She likes it. She told you she likes it. You like it. Increase the frequency and see what happens. Push it.
Thanks for the very concrete advise...I'll try that...
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Old 05-16-2010, 08:43 AM   #42
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I'm not sure I understand the term 'nilla' - but it's not BDSM forceful in the sense I talk about it...
Then why did you post it in a BDSM forum?
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Old 05-16-2010, 08:45 AM   #43
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Maybe it is simply control...
For myself I have an extremely demanding job and must tell people who are very Sr to me exactly what is wrong with this department or that department I put in long hours, demand excellence, and in return it is demanded of me to produce the best work possible. I then come home run the house, the dog, the kids, and anything else that comes up. I want one area of my life where I can simply loose myself and have no power...no choice no control over anything that happens.
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Old 05-16-2010, 08:47 AM   #44
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yeah pls....I'm always the instigator and slightly forceful one...
i wouldn't mind a little bit of love muscle...making me
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Old 05-16-2010, 08:52 AM   #45
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DaneCopenhagen View Post
... being dominant is a role I put on, which is more difficult than just being your normal person making love to the one you love...

As cute as I think that is, the fact that your "dominance" is a role, is no fun (for me at least , I bet your wife disagrees)


But well, to answer your question;
in general women like to end up getting a forceful fuck (so after the nice and sweet stuff). If you're willing to act, then fine...there's no timing issue really, just don't go into acting all the time.
makebelieve gets old if done too frequently.

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Old 05-16-2010, 09:15 AM   #46
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Originally Posted by DaneCopenhagen View Post
I think we share the same experience - when do you know you have to be rough - is that something which happens during the sexact or something you decide before?
It's in her eyes, usually after a few drinks and a few well placed comments. These let me know if she wants vanilla, me in control or her in control. If I try to plan something like this, it backfires one way or another. Spontaneity is the key to our best experiences.
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Old 05-16-2010, 02:11 PM   #47
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Netzach View Post
I've only met one man in my life who gave the forcefully-treated-sexually prospect a pass. Most people like letting the other person do the work of driving the encounter, getting them off, doing things *to* them. The fact that I enjoy doing the work as much as I do makes me a minority. The dirty secret isn't how many women like this (almost all do at some point) it's that almost all men do.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Netzach View Post
This jives with the common theory that people, given a chance, will be lazy.
Quote:
Originally Posted by DeepGreenEyes View Post
So... I should tell my submissive that she's a lazy-assed bitch when she behaves submissively?

Do it. She likes it. She told you she likes it. You like it. Increase the frequency and see what happens. Push it.
i keep picking up on this word laziness, and for some reason it is making me defensive. i guess it's because i like to feed the fire. responses, when raw, honest, animistic, guttural - and submissive - can feed the PYL's fire - increasing the intensity of the entire act. it's not about being a lazy bump on the log, waiting to be taken, and no, i'm not talking about topping from the bottom. it's the chemical reaction that occurs when two opposing elements meet. it's the glance that says i need You to consume me. the body language that portrays the vulnerability. the physical response to the force. the tightening of the body. the conflict between the desire, fear and pain feeding that fire like oxygen. rough sex that involves a full body work out and ends in multiple bruises is anything but lazy. that's my two cents.
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Old 05-16-2010, 03:21 PM   #48
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Submissiveness is anything BUT lazy in my reality.
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Old 05-16-2010, 03:29 PM   #49
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Submissiveness is anything BUT lazy in my reality.
I think submissive is sometimes confused with passive.

as to the OP. depends. I like to 'play' hard, but there is always a lot of very gentle and affectionate mutual 'bonding' before and after.
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Old 05-16-2010, 03:49 PM   #50
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Want to be dominated.....turns me on so much

I am craving BDSM to me. Will someone talk real dirty to me?
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