Old 12-10-2013, 10:31 PM   #1
UnderYourSpell
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Humorous Poetry

I have just written a humorous Poem which I intended to submit in the usual way (and perhaps I still will) but to tell you the truth I was put off doing so by certain members who come over all high falutin' about what is and what isn't poetry, and I wasn't sure if I was in the right state of mind to be torn to shreds for what after all is a bit of nonsense.
I'm all for writing a bit of humour now and then and it never did Edward Lear or Lewis Carroll any harm!

Tongue aided tittilations

Old age isn't for sissies
when it comes to the marital bed,
what once swung from the chandeliers
now cowers in fright in your head.
Raising her expectations
is never a good idea
although tongue aided tittilations
without false teeth raise a cheer.
Anything Kama Sutra
is definitely chancing your arm,
not to mention rheumatic joints
bound to come to great harm.
So although you're no longer twenty
but the urges are still just as deep
make sure your actions are gentler
and your athletic frolics less steep.
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Blessed are the cracked for it is they that let in the light
They say a smile is a gift which is free to the giver and precious to the recipient.
But giving the finger is free, too, and I find it more personal and sincere.
If at first you don't succeed....skydiving is not for you ....
If you don't pay your exorcist .... do you get repossessed?
I shall always decide not to decide, unless of course I decide to change my mind.
....But I, being poor, have only my dreams, I have spread my dreams under your feet,Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.......
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Old 12-10-2013, 10:52 PM   #2
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titillations (sp)
and the beat is off
make the most of it
the beat is off

what's that you said?
you never did Edward Lear or Lewis Carroll?
Christ Annie, you can't be that old to care about them, even if Lewis Carroll did fancy the young ones, I think it was before your time.
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Old 12-10-2013, 11:02 PM   #3
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plus if you have been over in New Poems lately, you would realize some of the words you use are bigger than average.
chandeliers, tittilations (sp), and rheumatic clearly are beyond the knowledge of some, perhaps
light thing, clit vibes. and creaky might be better.
I hope to fuck you realize, I'm just kidding around.
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Old 12-11-2013, 02:55 AM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by UnderYourSpell View Post
I have just written a humorous Poem which I intended to submit in the usual way (and perhaps I still will) but to tell you the truth I was put off doing so by certain members who come over all high falutin' about what is and what isn't poetry, and I wasn't sure if I was in the right state of mind to be torn to shreds for what after all is a bit of nonsense.
serious answers
Currently there are about four people over in New Poems that leave comments, it is doubtful any one of them will tear it to shreds. A9 (Kama Sutra) will probably high-five it. What the others think I don't know.
Your poem is obliviously meant to be funny, again I don't know, however I suspect it will probably be warmly received by at least two of them. You may have the anon, the anon is not capable of tearing anything to shreds including his own toilet paper, his mother is still wiping his ass.
Most of the people in the threads (including you) don't go over into new poems, you will probably get a few friends.
The high falutin' talk about what poetry is and isn't; at best there are maybe five here, one or two may be friends of yours, one is inactive and probably would not comment anyway, one is Senna and that is doubtful also, so that leaves maybe one other suspect. Currently, I am in serious fuck off mode, so I am defaulting to is it funny, and I've already had my fun so if I see it I would leave a lame comment like "commented on in thread" and since I corrected a spelling, it absolves me of any further guilt and leave a 5. I had do so earlier on something rather quite lame, solely because it amused me and he wasn't a serial submitter.
It would not get a rave, few do.
That would be my guess as to what will happen. However, me saying what I just said may create a backlash effect, that would probably work in your favour.

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and as Shakespeare never said
much ado, adieu
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Old 12-11-2013, 06:48 AM   #5
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12's right about your typo, annie.

apart from that, publish and be damned! it's clearly just a fun piece and you, as its author, don't need to fear submitting it. in fact, i'm at a loss to why you should be concerned. there's room for all kinds of poetry; content, style, layout . . . variety's the spice of life and make mine spicy
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Old 12-11-2013, 09:02 AM   #6
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Blame my spellchecker for not picking up the typo! I didn't just open the thread to have a whine, but for myself and others that may want to add bits of whimsy as and when they feel like it. Yes I do admit I haven't been over to new poetry to comment but I have been voting so obviously have been reading.
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Blessed are the cracked for it is they that let in the light
They say a smile is a gift which is free to the giver and precious to the recipient.
But giving the finger is free, too, and I find it more personal and sincere.
If at first you don't succeed....skydiving is not for you ....
If you don't pay your exorcist .... do you get repossessed?
I shall always decide not to decide, unless of course I decide to change my mind.
....But I, being poor, have only my dreams, I have spread my dreams under your feet,Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.......
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Old 12-11-2013, 11:16 AM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by UnderYourSpell View Post
Blame my spellchecker for not picking up the typo! I didn't just open the thread to have a whine, but for myself and others that may want to add bits of whimsy as and when they feel like it. Yes I do admit I haven't been over to new poetry to comment but I have been voting so obviously have been reading.
Humorous poetry is given the widest licence possible with regard to meter and rhyme, so I see no reason not to extend this to spelling as well.
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Old 12-11-2013, 11:26 AM   #8
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The kind of people who look down on "light verse" also tend to be the people who draw sharp distinctions between poetry and popular culture--people who, for example, think lyricists of popular music or theater cannot, by definition, be poets--i.e. the kinds of people who are the reason that poetry is a very niche thing in our society. They're best ignored and/or mocked.
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Old 12-11-2013, 12:32 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bronzeage View Post
Humorous poetry is given the widest licence possible with regard to meter and rhyme, so I see no reason not to extend this to spelling as well.
unintentional, ah, no, however I just point it out if I catch it, primarily to let them know I read it.
licence (sp?)
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Old 12-11-2013, 12:33 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bronzeage View Post
Humorous poetry is given the widest licence possible with regard to meter and rhyme, so I see no reason not to extend this to spelling as well.
I beg your pardon for having a typo and grovel mightily
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Blessed are the cracked for it is they that let in the light
They say a smile is a gift which is free to the giver and precious to the recipient.
But giving the finger is free, too, and I find it more personal and sincere.
If at first you don't succeed....skydiving is not for you ....
If you don't pay your exorcist .... do you get repossessed?
I shall always decide not to decide, unless of course I decide to change my mind.
....But I, being poor, have only my dreams, I have spread my dreams under your feet,Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.......
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Old 12-11-2013, 12:35 PM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Setanta84 View Post
The kind of people who look down on "light verse" also tend to be the people who draw sharp distinctions between poetry and popular culture--people who, for example, think lyricists of popular music or theater cannot, by definition, be poets--i.e. the kinds of people who are the reason that poetry is a very niche thing in our society. They're best ignored and/or mocked.
I've always held that Rap is rhyming poetry but was chastised for that on a past thread
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Blessed are the cracked for it is they that let in the light
They say a smile is a gift which is free to the giver and precious to the recipient.
But giving the finger is free, too, and I find it more personal and sincere.
If at first you don't succeed....skydiving is not for you ....
If you don't pay your exorcist .... do you get repossessed?
I shall always decide not to decide, unless of course I decide to change my mind.
....But I, being poor, have only my dreams, I have spread my dreams under your feet,Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.......
Nil Caborundum illigitimi
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Old 12-11-2013, 12:38 PM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Setanta84 View Post
The kind of people who look down on "light verse" also tend to be the people who draw sharp distinctions between poetry and popular culture--people who, for example, think lyricists of popular music or theater cannot, by definition, be poets--i.e. the kinds of people who are the reason that poetry is a very niche thing in our society. They're best ignored and/or mocked.
I shall do so likewise with you, unless I see comments from you in new poems.

Now, annie, just who where you referring to with that stray piece of demagoguery?
Voting without a name does nothing for either you or the writer.

And BTW, in NP, two threaders GM and BB, so maybe it is breaking a bit.

Pox
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Old 12-11-2013, 12:46 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by UnderYourSpell View Post
I have just written a humorous Poem which I intended to submit in the usual way (and perhaps I still will) but to tell you the truth I was put off doing so by certain members who come over all high falutin' about what is and what isn't poetry, and I wasn't sure if I was in the right state of mind to be torn to shreds for what after all is a bit of nonsense.
I'm all for writing a bit of humour now and then and it never did Edward Lear or Lewis Carroll any harm!

Tongue aided tittilations

Old age isn't for sissies
when it comes to the marital bed,
what once swung from the chandeliers
now cowers in fright in your head.
Raising her expectations
is never a good idea
although tongue aided tittilations
without false teeth raise a cheer.
Anything Kama Sutra
is definitely chancing your arm,
not to mention rheumatic joints
bound to come to great harm.
So although you're no longer twenty
but the urges are still just as deep
make sure your actions are gentler
and your athletic frolics less steep.

Yeah well, sucks getting older eh?

You do this sort of writing so well. The voice is conversational and the deadpan humor really comes across. I might have separated the stanzas so there is more of a pause between them, but that's me. And maybe change "athletic" to "amorous" but just my thought at the moment.

Humorous poetry can be great. I am a big fan of Shel Silverstein. Sick is one of my favorites of his.

Hope you keep exploring it Annie. Like I said, you are good at it. Your dung beetle poem is a perfect example--to me--of humor in a poem.
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Old 12-11-2013, 01:01 PM   #14
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Originally Posted by UnderYourSpell View Post
I've always held that Rap is rhyming poetry but was chastised for that on a past thread
Please give whomever chastised you a hearty 'fuck you' from me. I wouldn't qualify ALL rap as poetry--some of it is too reactionary to the music to have merit on that level when divorced from it--but I think it's just snobbery to go the other way on it.

Take Eminem, for example. His songs that deal with persona have been favorably compared to Robert Browning's work, which I actually think is fair, and his mastery of diction and the rhythms of modern usage in English is undeniable. (If you listen to interviews with him, he also speaks about the mechanics of language in terms that rival respected poets in the literary world, if he gets an interviewer who will go in that kind of direction.)

Given that, I think saying what he does cannot be considered poetry is as wrong-headed as ruling Bob Dylan or Stephen Sondheim out as a poet on the basis that their work appears somewhere other than literary journals and books.
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Old 12-11-2013, 01:10 PM   #15
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I made myself a snow ball as perfect as could be.
I thought I'd keep it as a pet and let it sleep with me.
I made it some pajamas and a pillow for it's head.
Then, last night it ran away.
But first...it wet the bed.
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Old 12-11-2013, 01:23 PM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BonBon1976 View Post
I made myself a snow ball as perfect as could be.
I thought I'd keep it as a pet and let it sleep with me.
I made it some pajamas and a pillow for it's head.
Then, last night it ran away.
But first...it wet the bed.
love it!

pyjamas?
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Old 12-11-2013, 01:30 PM   #17
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I made myself a snow ball as perfect as could be.
I thought I'd keep it as a pet and let it sleep with me.
I made it some pajamas and a pillow for it's head.
Then, last night it ran away.
But first...it wet the bed.
I do think you should point out that you didn't write this!!
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Blessed are the cracked for it is they that let in the light
They say a smile is a gift which is free to the giver and precious to the recipient.
But giving the finger is free, too, and I find it more personal and sincere.
If at first you don't succeed....skydiving is not for you ....
If you don't pay your exorcist .... do you get repossessed?
I shall always decide not to decide, unless of course I decide to change my mind.
....But I, being poor, have only my dreams, I have spread my dreams under your feet,Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.......
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Old 12-11-2013, 01:36 PM   #18
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Quote:
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I shall do so likewise with you, unless I see comments from you in new poems.

Now, annie, just who where you referring to with that stray piece of demagoguery?
Voting without a name does nothing for either you or the writer.

And BTW, in NP, two threaders GM and BB, so maybe it is breaking a bit.

Pox
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Angeline View Post
Yeah well, sucks getting older eh?

You do this sort of writing so well. The voice is conversational and the deadpan humor really comes across. I might have separated the stanzas so there is more of a pause between them, but that's me. And maybe change "athletic" to "amorous" but just my thought at the moment.

Humorous poetry can be great. I am a big fan of Shel Silverstein. Sick is one of my favorites of his.

Hope you keep exploring it Annie. Like I said, you are good at it. Your dung beetle poem is a perfect example--to me--of humor in a poem.
Thanks for that Ange
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Blessed are the cracked for it is they that let in the light
They say a smile is a gift which is free to the giver and precious to the recipient.
But giving the finger is free, too, and I find it more personal and sincere.
If at first you don't succeed....skydiving is not for you ....
If you don't pay your exorcist .... do you get repossessed?
I shall always decide not to decide, unless of course I decide to change my mind.
....But I, being poor, have only my dreams, I have spread my dreams under your feet,Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.......
Nil Caborundum illigitimi
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Old 12-11-2013, 01:40 PM   #19
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Give the Dung Beetle another airing

Ode to a Dung Beetle

Higgledy piggledy everso squiggerdly
rolls the dung beetle all over the land
picking up masses and even morasses
making the most of whatever's at hand.
Little dung beetle, oh little dung beetle
why does your heart sing for buckets of it
life rolling onwards backwards and forwards
shoveling up elephants bit after bit.
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Blessed are the cracked for it is they that let in the light
They say a smile is a gift which is free to the giver and precious to the recipient.
But giving the finger is free, too, and I find it more personal and sincere.
If at first you don't succeed....skydiving is not for you ....
If you don't pay your exorcist .... do you get repossessed?
I shall always decide not to decide, unless of course I decide to change my mind.
....But I, being poor, have only my dreams, I have spread my dreams under your feet,Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.......
Nil Caborundum illigitimi
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Old 12-11-2013, 02:32 PM   #20
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Originally Posted by UnderYourSpell View Post
Give the Dung Beetle another airing

Ode to a Dung Beetle

Higgledy piggledy everso squiggerdly
rolls the dung beetle all over the land
picking up masses and even morasses
making the most of whatever's at hand.
Little dung beetle, oh little dung beetle
why does your heart sing for buckets of it
life rolling onwards backwards and forwards
shoveling up elephants bit after bit.
LOL! This poem never gets old for me. It makes me laugh every time I read it.
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Old 12-11-2013, 02:32 PM   #21
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Quote:
Originally Posted by UnderYourSpell View Post
Give the Dung Beetle another airing

Ode to a Dung Beetle

Higgledy piggledy everso squiggerdly
rolls the dung beetle all over the land
picking up masses and even morasses
making the most of whatever's at hand.
Little dung beetle, oh little dung beetle
why does your heart sing for buckets of it
life rolling onwards backwards and forwards
shoveling up elephants bit after bit.
You do know how to start some shit.
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Old 12-11-2013, 02:34 PM   #22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Setanta84 View Post
Please give whomever chastised you a hearty 'fuck you' from me. I wouldn't qualify ALL rap as poetry--some of it is too reactionary to the music to have merit on that level when divorced from it--but I think it's just snobbery to go the other way on it.

Take Eminem, for example. His songs that deal with persona have been favorably compared to Robert Browning's work, which I actually think is fair, and his mastery of diction and the rhythms of modern usage in English is undeniable. (If you listen to interviews with him, he also speaks about the mechanics of language in terms that rival respected poets in the literary world, if he gets an interviewer who will go in that kind of direction.)

Given that, I think saying what he does cannot be considered poetry is as wrong-headed as ruling Bob Dylan or Stephen Sondheim out as a poet on the basis that their work appears somewhere other than literary journals and books.
You know how to start some shit too.
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"Words have the power to both destroy and heal. When words are both true and kind, they can change our world."- The Budda
"I'll never be a poet" - The Harry
"You are not the whim of a careless creator, experimenting in the laboratory of life... you were made with a purpose"."-Og Mandino
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Old 12-11-2013, 03:19 PM   #23
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You do know how to start some shit.
You need to look first two letters and last two on the last line
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Blessed are the cracked for it is they that let in the light
They say a smile is a gift which is free to the giver and precious to the recipient.
But giving the finger is free, too, and I find it more personal and sincere.
If at first you don't succeed....skydiving is not for you ....
If you don't pay your exorcist .... do you get repossessed?
I shall always decide not to decide, unless of course I decide to change my mind.
....But I, being poor, have only my dreams, I have spread my dreams under your feet,Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.......
Nil Caborundum illigitimi
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Old 12-11-2013, 03:31 PM   #24
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Originally Posted by UnderYourSpell View Post
You need to look first two letters and last two on the last line
Ha!..
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"Words have the power to both destroy and heal. When words are both true and kind, they can change our world."- The Budda
"I'll never be a poet" - The Harry
"You are not the whim of a careless creator, experimenting in the laboratory of life... you were made with a purpose"."-Og Mandino
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Old 12-11-2013, 04:10 PM   #25
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jasper was the dearest, sweetest moggie i've ever known

working out with Jasper

oh fuzzy-faced, contented cat
preferring cushions to the mat;
rotund, we both need exercise
I touch my toes - you roll your eyes;
you stretch, I jog till oh so hot;
I sweat - you scratch an awkward spot.

determined to burn calories
I twist and lunge, bend at the knees;
you flick your tail and preen a whisker,
lick a paw and deign to risk a
little shake, and then you drop
down cushionwards just as I flop
exhausted, wondering if I'm thinner;
you eye your empty bowl - where's dinner?
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