how do i start?

[Curioustallis]

I'm a curious 45 yo male That has been trying to have a discreet male to male experience in the Milwaukee, area. I've tried craigslist but I get some liner responses even though I specifically say that I won't reply to them. Dudes want instant hookups and I want to exchange conversation so I can see if it'll be a person compatible but I get one or two emails in and then nothing. Any Advice?

[gayTopher]

Yeah, stay away from CL

There are more popular websites that cater to gay men looking for whatever. (Coffee dates to LTRs to hookups of various styles and fetishes. )

Google is your friend. Shop around make a profile or two. Be honest be yourself and welcome.

The other thing, visit a gay bar or restaurant/bar that is frequented by gay men in your area. You'll meet gay men for conversation in a neutral and public setting. That is usually the best way. And be honest and upfront about your curiosity. If the guy you start to chat with isn't into you, he'll probably know someone who is.

Topher

[Mantra23a]

That's great advice, I'm also in a similar situation and have been trying to meet someone for a first time experience. I thought it would be fairly easy but I guess I've probably been too indirect.

[Curioustallis]

I'd have to go to a gay bar in some other town because I know too many people here. I'd be in an awkward situation if I satisfied my curiosity just to find out it's not to my liking and then I'm "out" for.no reason. Seems like good advice though.

[Stella_Omega]

Yeah well anyone you meet there is outed too. Everyone takes the same risks.

And you can out yourself as a straight ally, and stand alongside your GLBT fellow human beings.

[southern_gal]

Originally Posted by Mantra23a

That's great advice, I'm also in a similar situation and have been trying to meet someone for a first time experience. I thought it would be fairly easy but I guess I've probably been too indirect.

Believe it or not, women have the same kind of problem. At least I seem to. I am in a smaller town and have to travel a bit to keep from becoming gossip fodder. I thought that once I worked up the nerve to try this, that it would be far from difficult. CL for me is simply not ever gonna happen. Heard too many bad stories to even think about that. We have no gay bars in my city that I know of and unfortunately people talk so to even ask around gets the tongues wagging. I am patient however and hope you are as well. Good things come to those who wait right? Then again I imagine that you, like I, feel that we have waited long enough.

[klippert]

There are thousands of site for this... CL has become home to bottom feeders (no pun)....

You may have to be very specific in your web search. Men seeking a first time, you could try squirt dot org... listed as a 'gay' site... but, when you enter the chat room, you find the Married/ bi room the most full...

Most sites your going to have to sign up, and most are free. fill out the profile..no different than here on lit. Be very direct in what your looking for.

For the first time in over 20yrs I hooked up. Last yr. through squirt. If you really want it to happen it will...

[Wade1986]

adultfriendfinder and silverdaddies are pretty good sites.
be patient. I never meet a guy until we've chatted, exchanged email and in some cases cammed.
I've been to a very discreet gay bar not far from where I am and was amazed at the number of bisexuals there. it was nice to converse with like minded guys - we're all nervous, but are there for the same reason. I connected with a great guy there once and we've become 'special' friends. no one would ever guess what we do together.
there are lots of curious guys (and gals) who want to experiment. some end up liking it, some don't. find someone you're comfortable with and you'll probably have a good experience.
good luck!

[Tiger1978]

Originally Posted by Stella_Omega

Yeah well anyone you meet there is outed too. Everyone takes the same risks.

And you can out yourself as a straight ally, and stand alongside your GLBT fellow human beings.

This might be a more difficult excuse to adopt if he's chatting up a dude at the bar.

[Tiger1978]

Originally Posted by Curioustallis

I'm a curious 45 yo male That has been trying to have a discreet male to male experience in the Milwaukee, area. I've tried craigslist but I get some liner responses even though I specifically say that I won't reply to them. Dudes want instant hookups and I want to exchange conversation so I can see if it'll be a person compatible but I get one or two emails in and then nothing. Any Advice?

There are so many websites. Just be patient, ind one you like, chat online before you meet up and be careful. If you've the impulse, do it.

[Jd69wts]

Re: squirt dot org. Good spot, have met some great guys there...

Like others, CL kinda skeeves me out...I find it frightens me a bit.