Prolonging orgasm

oneguy4fun

Really Experienced
Joined
Feb 3, 2006
Posts
118
My wife likes to deny me orgasm. One of the things we both like is having sex where she gets to orgasm but I don't. Lately it seems that I have to stop frequently to keep myself from having an orgasm. This is starting to frustrate her. Any suggestions on what I can do to last longer?
 
She should make you yank the easy one off in the toilet (or whatever floats yer boat).
 
Orgasm Denial and Intercourse

Well, obviously, snowbyte's suggestion isn't going to fit in with your wife's desire to impose orgasm denial on you.

Unfortunately, SFOD (sexual frustration and orgasm denial) isn't very condusive to penile intercourse, as the more frustrated you get, the less you can do it.

You might be able to get a BIT of intercourse in by using a de-sensitizing cream and a few condoms (put the cream into the top of a condom, and then put it on, making sure to spread the cream around, then put on the second. Make sure they are not too tight (give yourself an ego boost and get the MAGNUMS if the re gulars are tight) as the extra pressure will only act to stimulate you. Make sure you give the cream time to start working before you begin.

In general, though, you're going to have to find ways to please your wife without your penis when engaged in longer-term SFOD, as you simply won't be able to give her the full effect. A penile extension or a strap-on (with your equipment pulled back) or a penis gag (so she can sit on your face and fuck herself as you helplessly watch and get more and more frustrated) are possibilities. She can even put the strap on right on your chest for a fun effect (if she isn't a BBW).

And, of course, there are the reliable hand and mouth.

Enjoy the fun. SFOD and T&D are some of my favorite activities.
 
I have no clue, sorry man.

For me, if I totally forget about cuming even being an option, then I can do epics, but since it’s always in the air for you I really don’t know. Maybe go slower, put on a beat to keep you from speeding up.

:confused:
 
Some guys find that a couple of beers make them less sensitive and able to last longer with penetrative sex. I think CyberChas's suggestions are more fun though.
 
You might be able to get a BIT of intercourse in by using a de-sensitizing cream and a few condoms (put the cream into the top of a condom, and then put it on, making sure to spread the cream around, then put on the second. Make sure they are not too tight (give yourself an ego boost and get the MAGNUMS if the re gulars are tight) as the extra pressure will only act to stimulate you. Make sure you give the cream time to start working before you begin.

In general, though, you're going to have to find ways to please your wife without your penis when engaged in longer-term SFOD, as you simply won't be able to give her the full effect. A penile extension or a strap-on (with your equipment pulled back) or a penis gag (so she can sit on your face and fuck herself as you helplessly watch and get more and more frustrated) are possibilities. She can even put the strap on right on your chest for a fun effect (if she isn't a BBW).

And, of course, there are the reliable hand and mouth.

Enjoy the fun. SFOD and T&D are some of my favorite activities.


Great suggestions. I guess I'm in quite a predicament. She wants to be pleased with my penis but does not want a condem and she is concerned about using chemicals. The penile extension, penis gag, and stap-on are great ideas. It's not my penis pleasuring her but it might be just as good for her. It certainly would drive me crazy giving her pleasure with these items, without receiving direct pleasure myself.

Snowbyte - you suggestion might just be a viable option. We've talked about shortening my denial periods buy I don't know if she'll let me off that easy.
 
One more thought...

There is another possibility...

If she "milks" you (link) at some point before you go at her, you should have a LOT of staying power as soon as your erection returns (recovery time will vary from person to person) and you can go bareback with no chemicals.

If she reads up on prostate milking she will see that it does NOT have to diminish your sexual frustration and doesn't really count as orgasm, so your denial remains. (BTW, the "iced milking" is particularly cruel. -grin).

I do recall a strap on I read about that could be attached over a chastity device for a great combination of intercourse and OD.
 
Condoms just about always keep me from an orgasm.

There are also various lotions, etc... that will desensitize you.
 
Mental Control

Ok, I'm a Dom. I cum when I want to. But I often want to prolong cumming for a variety of reasons.

The first effort is to slow down, reducing the friction will put of orgasm.

The second is the old smelly sneaker trick. When you feel yourself close to cumming, but not to close (if you wait until its imminent almost nothing will work) and concentrate on something totally unerotic for a few moments (smelly sneaker) that should set you back considerably and prolong your erection. Good luck.

ALthough I can't understand why you enjoy getting your wife off and leaving you at there, I respect your right to do it and enjoy it!
:devil:
 
Everything works, and NOTHING works

All of the tricks of the trade that are used to deal with premature ejaculation (or PE as they like to call it to make is sound better) will work TO A POINT in achieving what you want.

But, after a while, enough orgasm denial and sexual frustration, and you simply can't take much before you explode. It's like constantly being on a short fuse, ready to blow. Of course, that's also the FUN part of it.

I have heard of a trick called "send it back" that involves pressing down on the vessels on the underside of the penis from the top all the way down to push any semen that has begun its way up towards exit down back into the production centers. The "theory" of this trick is that there can be no orgasm when there is no sperm in the penis, and by repeated, slow, and total returns of the sperm to whence they began, you can create an erect penis that is not capable of ejaculation and orgasm. I have HEARD that it works, but haven't been able to find much out about the process and have never experienced it. If anybody knows anything, please share.
 
My wife likes to deny me orgasm. One of the things we both like is having sex where she gets to orgasm but I don't. Lately it seems that I have to stop frequently to keep myself from having an orgasm. This is starting to frustrate her. Any suggestions on what I can do to last longer?

Breath deeply, relax, and don't think about it. Honestly. Have her keep your mind off of trying not to orgasm. You don't want to be thinking about anything until you get to where you want to be, then you can think about how great a lover you are when you get there. :)

If you keep yourself aroused long enough and manage to stop thinking and worrying, you can find your way into a mind set that allows for greater control. Staying relaxed and breathing will help relax your muscles, you're already too excited, which is the problem. After some time you'll be so hard that going to the bathroom wouldn't make your erection go down, that's when you'll be exactly where you want to be.

I'd also like to add that this is by far my most favorite form of birth control. I've had plenty of instances when I get to that mindset of remaining stiff and having full control over how much pleasure I feel. I absolutely love it and the orgasms are freaking fantastic when you've been going at it for a few hours.

Remember: breath, relax, focus your sensations away from your cock and onto something else, like your lady or think about ESPN and frogs or something until you hit that point of 18-year-old-rection.
 
More great suggestions. Thanks. CyberChas thanks for the Milking link. We might have to try that one. Has anyone used any kind of harness on their cock to prevent orgasm? I've tried a cock strap around the base of my cock and it does help to prolong the orgasm. It's been inconsistent with me. Sometimes I will have an orgasm wearing the strap and sometimes it's hard to have an orgasm. After reading everyone's thoughts and ideas, I'm thinking that a combination of things will help. If I breathe and relax, get milked, and wear a strap, it should all keep me from having an orgasm. I'll have to experiment with this.
 
ALthough I can't understand why you enjoy getting your wife off and leaving you at there, I respect your right to do it and enjoy it!
:devil:

SirLeo,

I guess it's all about the power. I get off on knowing that she has used me solely for her pleasure and not mine. I get an incredible rush of arousal when she has an orgasm and then rolls of me and says 'thanks, maybe I'll let you orgasm tommorrow.' It's hard to explain why it excites me. I don't think I fully understand it myself. I just know that I love being under her control and letting her control when and how I orgasm.
 
A great audio blog

The folks at Kink on Tap did a great episode on Teasing & Denial (and chastity play) that was well-thought-out, honest, refreshing, and not at all purient.

I recommend the hour of listening.

Here's the link.

I wish they were doing new material, but I don't believe they are.
 
Here's another little trick of the trade (apparently I'm not as sweet & innocent as I thought *cheeky smile*).

A man quite often finds it harder to orgasm if his legs are spread. Sometimes the thrusting for the woman this way isn't "just right" or deep enough though so maybe she won't go for it. I favour the position of her on her stomach with her legs together & him behind her, one leg either side of her legs. Another position is doggy, but this tends to be a hot button for most guys so maybe try it with her knees together, and place your legs outside hers... Good Luck, there is no "quick fix".
 
Here's another little trick of the trade (apparently I'm not as sweet & innocent as I thought *cheeky smile*).

A man quite often finds it harder to orgasm if his legs are spread. Sometimes the thrusting for the woman this way isn't "just right" or deep enough though so maybe she won't go for it. I favour the position of her on her stomach with her legs together & him behind her, one leg either side of her legs. Another position is doggy, but this tends to be a hot button for most guys so maybe try it with her knees together, and place your legs outside hers... Good Luck, there is no "quick fix".

Nice suggestions, indeed, but on the stomach can be hard to ignore. The sensation along the underside of my cock in that position is a hard one to focus away from. Oh Dear Lord that position seems designed for making babies. I think I'd have better luck in a straight doggy style, to avoid that precious rub, mmm.
 
Great Answer

SirLeo,

I guess it's all about the power. I get off on knowing that she has used me solely for her pleasure and not mine. I get an incredible rush of arousal when she has an orgasm and then rolls of me and says 'thanks, maybe I'll let you orgasm tommorrow.' It's hard to explain why it excites me. I don't think I fully understand it myself. I just know that I love being under her control and letting her control when and how I orgasm.

The important thing is you enjoy it. Bit of thread hijack here, but the interesting thing about myself and the D side is that it is really only arousing when a sub is strong willed. If they were a doormat so to speak it wouldn't excite me at all.
 
Orgasm control is fairly simple, it just requires some practice and the mastery of some basic internal tricks. What it really comes down to, more than anything, is focus and awareness. These can be hard to come by when you are all up in a tight snatch, of course. That's where a partner who is on the same level can come in handy.

Check out Mantak Chia's books. He explains the moves.
 
Have you thought about hypnosis? While it is usually used for increasing sensitivity and eroticism, I've zero doubt that it could as easily be used for the opposite.

http://www.peter-masters.com/look_into_my_eyes/index.html has an excellent PDF book on Erotic Hypnosis 101. :)

Some D/s relationships have gone so far as to have the hypnotherapist implant "Stop" and "Go" words for orgasms.

Ooooh what fun!


*grins evilly at TMS* :kiss:
 
Some D/s relationships have gone so far as to have the hypnotherapist implant "Stop" and "Go" words for orgasms.

Ooooh what fun!


*grins evilly at TMS* :kiss:

Oh, that's a great idea. I already have an orgasm trigger in mine (she doesn't particularly appreciate "out of the clear blue sky" orgasms, but only a little bit of spinup makes it good instead of unpleasant) and she can't orgasm unless I trigger her or give her permission, but those are nice additional controls. :D
 
I favour the position of her on her stomach with her legs together & him behind her, one leg either side of her legs.

That is a great position. I haven't done that in years unfortunately, but LDR and I were frequent fans of that one. I'll have to remind him of this next time he travels south. :devil:
 
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