I have finally deduced the true meaning of abuse
- Thread starter Marquis
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HottieMama
Notta Domme
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BULLSHIT!
Christ, it's no where near that fucking simple.
sanjuaneros
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Agreed.
Marquis
Jack Dawkins
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OK, the gist is that the person ends the relationship.
Marquis
Jack Dawkins
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It's not?
Care to break down the groundwork of the metaphysics of this shit for me? I happen to think this golden rule is solid as a rock.
myinnerslut
His chains. His lash.
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or those mentally unable to care for themselves who cannot leave?
DeservingBitch
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If this is supposed to be a joke, it is so not funny.
If this is really what you think, it's fucking scary.
If this is really what you think, it's fucking scary.
Marquis
Jack Dawkins
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You'll have to define this situation a little better for me.
There is a difference between CAN'T leave and WON'T leave. But truthfully, outside of the most extreme examples, "can't" usually means "won't."
graceanne
iteroticalay urugay
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The three year old who's daddy thinks she's sexy. The two year old with the broken are. CAN NOT.
You know.
Never mind, silly me. This is one of your 'get a rise out of people' threads you do when you're bored. I'm outta here.
Marquis
Jack Dawkins
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If they're mentally unable to care for themselves, these people better be damn happy they have someone willing to do it at all!
Boggles the mind, doesn't it?
LittleJade
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See, now, here's the problem with this reaction, for me-
I can understand where Marquis is coming from on this one. I can understand the thought process that might lead to that conclusion, and I can understand how defensible it is, given the exclusion of children, or those who are mentally or physically unable to care for themselves.
The problem is that this is not how it SHOULD be. Abuse SHOULD be defined as anything that harms another, against their will... or something as strongly idealistic as that. But in the end, for adults, for those who CAN care for themselves... what's keeping them in situations where they feel abused?
Money? Poor self confidence? A job? Family ties? Are all of those things really worth the continued abuse? What would make you leave? Something horrible enough to kill you? Because if you stay for the small things, chances are you'll stay for things a little bigger, then a little bigger, then a little bigger... at what point is it enough to make you leave?
I'm not arguing that those things are or are not worth it, I'm just trying to outline my thoughts on Marquis' remark.
Marquis
Jack Dawkins
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The three year old who's daddy thinks she's sexy. The two year old with the broken are. CAN NOT.
You know.
Well, if you CAN'T leave that's something altogether different, isn't it?!
If you won't leave it's a choice!
MY HYPOTHESIS HAS SEEN NO SOLID COUNTERARGUMENT AS OF YET
LittleJade
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I'd like to add that, despite my previous post, I agree with those who said it's not that simple.
I've been in that type of situation, and the things that kept me there were stupid... so I suppose I was lucky. There are complications to simply leaving, and for those who agonize over those complications, my heart goes out.
I've been in that type of situation, and the things that kept me there were stupid... so I suppose I was lucky. There are complications to simply leaving, and for those who agonize over those complications, my heart goes out.
BiBunny
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The burden of proof is on the person posing the hypothesis. Just sayin'. *Shrug*
Marquis
Jack Dawkins
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It's not that complicated.
Empirical evidence suggests that all BDSM relationships end upon one of three conditions:
1. The Dom was abusive
2. The Sub was not a real Sub
3. Death
Who has ever heard of a sub calling their dom abusive while they are still together? She will imply the shit out of it, but once she uses the word, she has to break up with him.
Marquis
Jack Dawkins
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I've been in this type of situation as well, and it can indeed be agonizing.
Of course, it had occurred to me that I was being abusive before she left, but only her leaving confirmed it.
Res ipsa loquitur, bitch.
DeservingBitch
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Maybe you could start by educating yourself about what women who are abused go through and what their life look like.
Then maybe you should consider the fact that being abused IS often the reason why women don't leave.
Or maybe consider the ridiculously high number of women (and often their children) who are killed by their abusive partners every year for trying to leave.
But yes, lets put the blame of the women who are being abused. Because this is what you're doing by saying that if they don't leave, it's their choice. You're either putting the responsibility of the abuse on them, or denying that there's abuse.
And why i'm not the least fucking surprised that this bullshit is coming from a dude?
Here, in case you feel like educating yourself. That's just a start. Google is your friend:
Why doesn't she leave?
myinnerslut
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so your really saying that
WITHIN A BDSM RELATIONSHIP Abuse is what makes a person leave, break-up, cut off, whatever.
If you don't leave, it's not abuse.
WITHIN A BDSM RELATIONSHIP Abuse is what makes a person leave, break-up, cut off, whatever.
If you don't leave, it's not abuse.
the_pet
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BiBunny
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If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, etc., etc.
LittleJade
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You had failed to stipulate 'BDSM relationship' in your opening post.
Had you included that, my answer may have been different.
the_pet
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...i'm curious why you felt the need to share your revelation with us
pet
....there must be some story that drives this blurt of Marquis....
twysted73
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Ok, Hijack for mental pause and re-grouping. But m.i.s., what are those marks on you from?
They look unhappy.
*reaches instinctively for astringent*
Maybe if I knew what caused them I'd appreciate them more.
Enlighten?
