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Old 01-05-2005, 01:59 PM   #1
Quoll
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Depression. Anxiety. Panic Attacks. etc

Was going to write long spiel about why start this thread.
A lot of people have started their own self help threads and I think they are essential, but it couldn`t hurt to have a place to discuss general issues.

CBT

Natural Panic Attack Treatments

Anti-anxiety Meds

Agoraphobia

Drug Information

Depression description

Symptons

Depression/Thyroid

Anxiety Symptoms

Information for Friends and Family Members

How Family and Friends Can Help the Depressed Person

WHAT IS A DEPRESSIVE DISORDER?

Depnet

Moodgym

Am I depressed? Do I have anxiety?

Self-Safe Hypnosis

Books:
1) " Life without limits " , by Lucinda Bassett
2) " From Panic to power " , also by Lucinda Bassett
( Lucinda Bassett is the founder of the Midwest Center for Stress and Anxiety)

Genetic links?


PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder):
http://www.ncptsd.va.gov/ncmain/index.jsp

http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topic...sd/index.shtml

http://www.ptsdinfo.org/

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/pos...sorder/DS00246

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Old 01-05-2005, 02:08 PM   #2
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Too early for me to make sense.
When I was finally diagnosed it wasn`t "Oh shit depression"
It was more "You mean I`m not going crazy, I`m just sick"

Anyway we will see where this goes, just thought we could crawl out of the darkness together.
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Old 01-05-2005, 02:59 PM   #3
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You are definitely not alone.

I was diagnosed several months ago, although I think I've been battling this disease for most of my adult life. I was resistant to taking medication for it, until the time came when I felt like my very survival depended on doing something, anything. The pain was just too great.

The medication has made a big difference in the quality of my life. Is it a magic bullet? Not at all. There's a lot of hard work involved in recovery, and I know I'm not there yet. But the anxiety is gone for the most part, and that is such a blessed relief.

Congratulations on taking the first step. I wish you well.

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Old 01-05-2005, 03:19 PM   #4
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I've been on meds for nigh 25 years. It's genitic; my father has it worse than I, and at least two of my kids are headed down the same road. My 13 year old is on meds and my 15 year old should be too.

So while I'm very grateful for modern chemistry, I'm wondering what the fallout of a lifetime of chemicals are. Very few studies run more than a couple of months, and the manufacture always has a "ong time use" disclaimer.
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Old 01-05-2005, 05:17 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally posted by ReadyOne
I've been on meds for nigh 25 years. It's genitic; my father has it worse than I, and at least two of my kids are headed down the same road. My 13 year old is on meds and my 15 year old should be too.

So while I'm very grateful for modern chemistry, I'm wondering what the fallout of a lifetime of chemicals are. Very few studies run more than a couple of months, and the manufacture always has a "ong time use" disclaimer.
I've been on meds for about 8 years, altho I've been battling my disease for most of my life. I'm diagnosed with severe clinical depression, with secondary panic/anxiety disorder, and was suicidal off and on for years.

I probably should have been on meds most of my life, as the uncontrollable mood swings and other stuff have been a major part of me since I was about 10 or so. As with ReadyOne, my disease is genetic as well, but with the meds, we've been able to pretty much get it under control.

Nope, you're definitely not alone.
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Old 01-05-2005, 06:35 PM   #6
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A combination of work and health issues have thrown me into a downward-spiral of anxiety. Thank goodness i haven't had any panic attacks lately. I finally made an appointment with a psychotherapist because it has been so debilitating. I was in therapy a while back and quit prematurely b/c it was so difficult. I hope I can stick with it this time.

I've chosen to avoid meds as much as possible, but I do have tranquilizers that I can take in case I feel a panic attack coming on. It's a comfort just knowing that I have that.

Yesterday, I went for a full-body massage, and it was so great. I highly recommend it. It was the first time in weeks i was able to just completely zone out and relax...and I feel much less tense today.

Y'all aren't alone!
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Old 01-05-2005, 08:32 PM   #7
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Have any of you tried self hypnosis or Yoga for your panic attacks?

I had a friend who was practically housebound and having frequent panic attacks till she tried Yoga and self hypnosis to relieve some of the worst panic attacks.

Learning to breathe properly helped her too.

http://www.healthyplace.com/Communit...lternative.asp

At her Drs and therapists suggestion she tried these things.
Next port of call was meds.



It worked wonders for her.

But always consult your Dr and discuss with them what is going on.
We all need a bit of help every now and then.
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Old 01-05-2005, 11:30 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally posted by Debbie
Have any of you tried self hypnosis or Yoga for your panic attacks?

I had a friend who was practically housebound and having frequent panic attacks till she tried Yoga and self hypnosis to relieve some of the worst panic attacks.

Learning to breathe properly helped her too.

http://www.healthyplace.com/Communit...lternative.asp

At her Drs and therapists suggestion she tried these things.
Next port of call was meds.



It worked wonders for her.

But always consult your Dr and discuss with them what is going on.
We all need a bit of help every now and then.
This sounds very interesting, as I have all three, and many other health issues as well. I'm on 5 meds that I have to take daily, and several more that are as needed. Without them, I'd be hospitalized. Therapy never did me much good because all she wanted me to talk about was today, not what made me the way I am and how to cope with it.

Getting help is a wonderful and brave thing to do. Bless you.
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Old 01-06-2005, 01:36 AM   #9
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"Too early for me to make sense."
Oops, I meant that literally, it was about 5.00am when I started this thread. I had been thinking about doing it for a while and the more I read here the more I was sure.
Last night was a particularly bad night, (fucking dreams) seemed the perfect time.

I`ve been on the meds for about three years, had severe depression for about three years before that (now there was a person I didn`t like) and have had anxiety and panic attacks on an off since my teens.


bobsgirl,
You`re right it`s not a magic bullet, but by hell it makes life worth living. I just wish they had told me that I would be a fucking zombie that first day, great time to visit friends, I think they all thought I was mad


ReadyOne,
Probably genetic in my family too, one of my older brothers certainly has it and I suspect a few of the others do too.
My oldest son (7) looks like he is heading the same
way.

babydoll2u,
Like the meds or not, we all know what life would be like without them. Would any of us even have bothered to come here. I couldn`t even remember what a sex drive was.

dollface007,
Massage, ooh massage, that has got to be one of lifes great pleasures. Not sure if it`s just the relaxation or also the fact that some stranger (preferably opposite sex for me) is rubbing their hands all over you.
Hell I even feel good when they wash my hair at the hairdressers. (or is that just me).
More power to you if you can get by without the meds, I worry about the long term affects, but I suspect without them I wouldn`t be here for the long term.

Debbie,
For anxiety I do try to talk myself through it and sometimes make myself do what I don`t want to do.
Some days it works great I can charge in like I own the world.
For panic attacks, run and hide.



intrigued,
*hugs* I hope some of the stuff here can be of use.


Thanks for all the help, it`s nice not to have to do this on your own.
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Old 01-06-2005, 04:17 AM   #10
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I'm another that doesn't function without meds. I've been on them for six years or so now, and when the pharmacy screws up and I can't get them, I become someone very scary.

I have a pretty bad case of social anxiety disorder. You used to hear about it all the time when Paxil first came out. I suppose a lot of people think it's bull. However, when I was first diagnosed, I couldn't leave the house alone, or without someone "safe." Couldn't answer the phone. In fact, I still can't unless I know who it is, and I'm okay with talking to that person. That, though, maybe be a holdover from the five years I worked in tech support before I had any treatment. It's cost me more jobs than I care to think about, either from not being able to get out of bed in the morning to the almost-predictable yearly nervous breakdown I'd have.

Hugs to everyone here. It's a rough life, but we'll all get through. Somehow.
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Old 01-06-2005, 07:26 AM   #11
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It wasn't until a couple of months ago that I went to my doctor saying I knew I'd been and was still depressed. I'd battled with it for some time...my anxiety levels made things harder to deal with and I've had a few panic attacks. I decided I wanted to talk with my doctor first and get some contact names and phone numbers for counsellors she recommends. I've been to counselling once since then and at the moment I'm very happy.

I look back and see I should've gone to a counsellor well before I actually did. When I was at my worst would've been an opportune time for that! I also spoke to a phone counselling service once and that helped at the time too.

BUT...hindsight is a wonderful thing

I would like to add that it was a nice surprise to find this thread here tonight
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Old 01-06-2005, 11:16 AM   #12
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Quote:
Originally posted by geishaGirl


I would like to add that it was a nice surprise to find this thread here tonight
You are very welcome

It took me three years before I finally worked out that I should see my doctor. I just went in and said "Somethings very wrong up here" *tapping head* he basically said "Hmm I think you have depression try these tablets"
*smack self on forehead* You mean I nearly destroyed my marriage and all I had to do was come here.

I am sure there will be lots of things we can find to help each other.

WV,
My anxiety is not as bad as yours, I just break out into a sweat, get a bit paranoid and decide I really don`t need to be here, it`s time to go home.
I spent eight years in a job that I really didn`t like, but that was easier than fronting for interviews.


Oh there is so much more

So how many of us actually had a sex life/desire before we realised what was going on.?
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Old 01-06-2005, 06:06 PM   #13
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Quoll, in regards to the sex life/desire aspect - after my husband and I got married my libido just plummeted to absolutely nothing! I think it was a good 3-4 months of "not tonight honey". Not only did I not feel like sex, I didn't want to touch myself, I didn't get ANY feelings of arousal when my husband touched me and I would describe it in a way that I read in a story once - my pussy was dead!

Initially, I just didn't feel like having sex and that didn't bother me so much, I did feel guilty though Then it got to the point where I didn't feel any arousal and I started getting very frustrated I don't remember vividly what my mental state was like at the time, I do know I was still depressed then and I would assume that having just been married for some reason may have had something to do with it - the low after the high maybe?

to everyone here
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Old 01-06-2005, 07:01 PM   #14
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Quote:
Originally posted by quoll

<snip>

So how many of us actually had a sex life/desire before we realised what was going on.?
First, thank you for your reply to me. I don't often see support for this issue at Lit, so I really do appreciate it.

As for a sex life, mine was and yet wasn't existant until I met the man I've been with for 2 and a half years now. When I met him, I was in one of my many untreated cycles, in which I thought I could heal myself. About a year and a half into the relationship, he convinced me that I couldn't. Throughout the entire relationship, I was always ready to jump him, and still am. The meds have had an adverse effect on me, but he plays things just right and it always cuts through all the side effects that kill the desire. He is the first man I've been with that my love for him just seems to cut through any and everything and I want to be intimate with him in every way possible, 24/7.

Before him, because of issues in my past that I couldn't shake no matter how much help I got, I was like a robot, yet I could have won an oscar for the way I covered my true feelings. You would have thought I was a sex goddess to watch me, but what I was really doing was trying to be so good that they couldn't last because that would put an end to it. Well, atleast until the next time my guilt got the better of me and I'd give in again. There was a time it was so bad, I would hyperventilate and feel like I was dying, just because a man was on top of me.

Between the issues I had all my life and then the depression and panic attacks, going off and on meds repeatedly, I had zero sexual desire. It's just a part of it all, sadly. But there is help and there is hope, but you have to work really hard and be willing to fight for a life.

I wish something better for all of you.
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Old 01-06-2005, 07:19 PM   #15
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I found this article and thought it might help someone.

http://my.webmd.com/content/article/64/72548.htm
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Old 01-06-2005, 09:04 PM   #16
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Quote:
Originally posted by intrigued
First, thank you for your reply to me. I don't often see support for this issue at Lit, so I really do appreciate it.

As for a sex life, mine was and yet wasn't existant until I met the man I've been with for 2 and a half years now. When I met him, I was in one of my many untreated cycles, in which I thought I could heal myself. About a year and a half into the relationship, he convinced me that I couldn't. Throughout the entire relationship, I was always ready to jump him, and still am. The meds have had an adverse effect on me, but he plays things just right and it always cuts through all the side effects that kill the desire. He is the first man I've been with that my love for him just seems to cut through any and everything and I want to be intimate with him in every way possible, 24/7.

Before him, because of issues in my past that I couldn't shake no matter how much help I got, I was like a robot, yet I could have won an oscar for the way I covered my true feelings. You would have thought I was a sex goddess to watch me, but what I was really doing was trying to be so good that they couldn't last because that would put an end to it. Well, atleast until the next time my guilt got the better of me and I'd give in again. There was a time it was so bad, I would hyperventilate and feel like I was dying, just because a man was on top of me.

Between the issues I had all my life and then the depression and panic attacks, going off and on meds repeatedly, I had zero sexual desire. It's just a part of it all, sadly. But there is help and there is hope, but you have to work really hard and be willing to fight for a life.

I wish something better for all of you.
Hi Intrigued

It`s surprising not to see more support for it here, when I read a lot of the posts, little bits and pieces keep popping up (no pun ) that I recognised, and I found myself thinking that there must be a lot of us here that are suffering in one way or another. How else are you going to talk to complete strangers without leaving your house or breaking into a cold sweat .

I had a great sex life and a disgustingly high libido before the darkness, (I stole that from somewhere)
but when it came it was like someone turned off a switch, there was just nothing.
This just about killed my wife, who has her own problems and being rejected by me was the last thing she needed.
I used to look at porn online to try and kindle something, I might as well have been reading the newspaper.
Things are a lot better now, I`m not back to what I was, but my wife is learning to compensate,
(I`m going to bed and if you`re not there within 10 mins I`ll start without you)
I usually wait about 12 mins. Hey I`ve got depression but I`m not dead

There is nothing more reassuring than being with your soulmate, we should count ourselves lucky.

This is the beautiful lady on Lit that spurred me on,please take time to drop in.

Suggestions, pretty please

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Old 01-06-2005, 11:34 PM   #17
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Quote:
Originally posted by quoll
When I was finally diagnosed it wasn`t "Oh shit depression"
It was more "You mean I`m not going crazy, I`m just sick"

Quoll -- What a great thread. KUDOS to you!

bobsgirl -- I hear ya on the "hard road to recovery." It ain't easy.

I was just diagnosed with mild depression and anxiety a few months ago. Have been on anti-depressants since then and it's helped immensely.

I never noticed any problems before hand, but once my Docs started trying to figure out why I wasn't having a period for oh, say...6 months and not being pg...they figured out it was my thyroid. Come to find out, my inactive thyroid had something to do w/ the depression symptoms. I didn't notice any sexual issues. Hubby and I had both been so busy with work & school, once or twice a week was "good."

It wasn't a "manic" type of symptoms for me. More a "my skin is too tight." You know, nothing fits right - life, work, school, family, spouse/significant other, sex, hobbies. Just nothing fits and you're on edge but don't know why.

On a side note, I took a final elective for college, which was a holistic health class. We had to do a research paper on a disease or something health-related that impacted us personally. I picked women and depression. I DID find out that Yoga does help with depression and other depression-type symptoms. I'll see if I can find the titles of the books I used in my research.
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Old 01-06-2005, 11:52 PM   #18
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That is an interesting point about the thyroid cricketbug. My mother is on the "borderline" for having problems with hers which may contribute to her extreme anxiety. There are other factors and I think even that environment may have contributed to me emulating my own mother's depressive behaviour...to a point.

But the thyroid is certainly something that can impact on a person greatly - as you would know!
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Old 01-07-2005, 12:19 AM   #19
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One thing I'm finding is helping me feel better is exercise. But that might be some of the "doing something for myself" thing, which is all too rare in my life.

I was wondering if anyone else had horrible insomnia with their problems. I think it might be my medicines, but I'm not sure. Good thing I'm not working right now, I'm going through a really rough patch of it lately.

Hugs all around.
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Old 01-07-2005, 01:56 AM   #20
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Quote:
Originally posted by WarmVanilla
One thing I'm finding is helping me feel better is exercise. But that might be some of the "doing something for myself" thing, which is all too rare in my life.

I was wondering if anyone else had horrible insomnia with their problems. I think it might be my medicines, but I'm not sure. Good thing I'm not working right now, I'm going through a really rough patch of it lately.

Hugs all around.
Hang in there WV (excellent nick BTW)

Ooh yeah sleep and I didn`t get on very well, maybe three/four hours a night, but not all at once.
Many, many nights wandering the house going over what I had done or said to my family and then hating myself for it, and then blaming them and so on.

I sleep a lot better now, most nights anyway.
I take Zoloft for the depression and Zantac for gastric reflux/heartburn whatever, can`t help but think there is a link between these two.

I think your right about the "something for yourself thing" I had a very physical job, a lot of exercise, but it was pottering around the garden that made me feel better for a while.
Lack of interest in just about anything is fairly common.

There is a light at the end of the tunnel. (might be a bad analogy)
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Old 01-07-2005, 02:10 AM   #21
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Quote:
Originally posted by geishaGirl
That is an interesting point about the thyroid cricketbug. My mother is on the "borderline" for having problems with hers which may contribute to her extreme anxiety. There are other factors and I think even that environment may have contributed to me emulating my own mother's depressive behaviour...to a point.

But the thyroid is certainly something that can impact on a person greatly - as you would know!
Very very good points and a very good thread.

The thyroid effects everything. Even if it is off just a tiny tiny bit. It messes with short term memory, moods swings, hair loss, weight loss/gain, metabolism, headaches, fatigue, depression ( in such a big way), the skin,the way your entire body functions, depends on it.
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Old 01-07-2005, 03:18 AM   #22
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In my humble opinion, of course:

Depression and lack of sex drive go hand in hand, I find -- nominally, because intimacy requires opening yourself up to touching or being touched. An ability to accept pleasure -- instead of dwelling in the pain.

When I'm depressed, I don't want to be around people -- in my head, it's more of a factor of 'nobody wants to see me like this' or 'I need to figure out how to cope with this on my own' or the very deadly 'I just want to sleep until this is better.'

This is part of what killed my relationship with someone I was being intimate with regularly. If one of us wasn't depressed, the other was -- and being the 'up' partner, you recognize when the other Wants To Be Left Alone(tm), let alone being willing to oblige you in bed.

Too long of a disconnect, and one of you starts wandering away. And that can feed into feelings of being unloved/unwanted/unattractive -- which (drumroll) -feeds depression-.

Sometimes it takes someone dragging you unwillingly somewhere where you're out of the depressive environment -- or making you laugh (Coyote is famous for making people smile and laugh despite their despair) -- and that's before you get into the happy pills.

Pity not all of us have friends like that. I managed to distance myself from all of mine (friends are friends, but friends are not ready-made lovers), and consquently have spent large chunks of the recent past in an obvious oblivion. I won't call it 'depression' so much as 'despair' and 'inevitability', though, since it wasn't that bad.

I found that writing out my pain helped; and then I quit writing after I hit a writer's block and writing burnout at the same time.

I lost myself in my work.

Sometimes it just takes realizing you're out of your routine of feeding your soul that helps kickstart you back into a better wellness path.

Other times, it's a matter of asking the right folks for help -- and going with someone else's opinion outside of your own.

We can't always be up, I know -- but we can't always be down, either.

Variety is the spice of life, as the saying goes -- and Variety is the entertainment newspaper.

For me, though. it's just remembering that I have friends in near and far places, and taking the time to at least say hello. One step at a time; one post at a time, one re-acquainting with old friends across the world.

Tonight I called up a friend I haven't seen in five years for her birthday.

She said she was thinking of me today.

Now that's a good relinking.

Not surprisingly, I dropped in here after that.

All the steps are linked together; just one is enough, sometimes.

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Old 01-07-2005, 08:11 AM   #23
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Quoll...i thought about what makes people happy..sad..heres a few thoughts
So many people give definitions of success and argue over what makes one successful. I always thought the answer was rather obvious. To be successful, you must be happy. Okay, then what does it mean to be happy? This took some more thought. There are three main schools of thought about happiness. The first is that material goods bring happiness. I dismissed this theory immediately.

The other two theories are more plausible. The second is that happiness is given by some thing. There are different sub-theories about what this thing is. The most common are love, religion, helping others, and your work. This theory seemed to be on the right track, but something was wrong. The third theory was that happiness was just a state of mind, and that to be happy you must simply think you are happy. I personally believed this was a load of horse droppings, but further speculation led me to believe that there may be some truth in it. However, if I was to find the answer, I believed I must delve deeper into the second theory.

I analyzed one of the sub-theories-religion. Priests tell us that we are given happiness by belief in God. If it doesn’t work, then the priests say your belief isn’t strong enough. That didn’t seem quite right. Of course it makes priests happy, I thought. That’s what makes them priests. I started to look at some of the other sub-theories and noticed a pattern. Authors said it was their work. Philanthropists said it was helping others. I had found the answer to happiness. There is one thing that makes everyone happy, but it varies from person to person.

Therefore, achieving happiness is a simple (on paper, anyway) four-step process. First, you must find what it is that makes you happy. This is actually easier if you are unhappy. If you are happy, enjoy it and stop reading this. If you are unhappy, then it is a simple process of elimination. Look at all the things you have. It’s not any of those. If you are not yet certain what it is that makes you happy, try some of the common things-love, religion, etc. You should have it narrowed down to one eventually.

Next you must get the thing that makes you happy. I cannot offer too much advice on this, because it will vary from person to person, but I will say to take risks and focus on your goal.

The next step is to affirm that this is what makes you happy. You will experience an unusual, but pleasant sensation, because for the first time in your life you will be truly happy. It should be rather obvious. If it is not, now is the time to start over. Otherwise, affirm that this is what makes you happy.

The final step should be obvious if you did step three properly. Strangely, this is where most people mess up. It shouldn’t be that way. You are now happy, you know what it is that makes you happy, and you know you need to hold on to that, or at least you should. You must remember what makes you happy, and not make stupid decisions. If it comes to a choice between this thing and anything else you must choose this. If you fail in this step, return to step two.

This is where the third theory comes into play. While you are keeping what makes you happy, BE HAPPY! Remember step three? This makes you happy. Stop worrying about everything else. There are also other factors that will stop you from being happy. The biggest, and least obvious, is morality. Unfortunately, I cannot give a clear definition of morality as I did for happiness, as this will vary widely. But I can give some guidelines. The basic definition of morality, at least to me, is that something is immoral when it causes someone else harm. Therefore, you need to think carefully before your actions. There are no clear-cut rules, such as “You shalt not lie!” because the truth may cause harm. Another rule I find helpful is to find one final rule to live by, so when all else fails and you wonder if you can live with yourself, you at least still have that. For example, I have my word. If I give someone my word one something, I will not break it. Period.

Well, what are you waiting for? I defined success, happiness, and morality for you. Now go and find what makes you happy!





now lets think of more sex slang
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Old 01-07-2005, 09:21 AM   #24
intrigued
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Posts: 13,161
Quote:
Originally posted by quoll
Hi Intrigued

It`s surprising not to see more support for it here, when I read a lot of the posts, little bits and pieces keep popping up (no pun ) that I recognised, and I found myself thinking that there must be a lot of us here that are suffering in one way or another. How else are you going to talk to complete strangers without leaving your house or breaking into a cold sweat .

I had a great sex life and a disgustingly high libido before the darkness, (I stole that from somewhere)
but when it came it was like someone turned off a switch, there was just nothing.
This just about killed my wife, who has her own problems and being rejected by me was the last thing she needed.
I used to look at porn online to try and kindle something, I might as well have been reading the newspaper.
Things are a lot better now, I`m not back to what I was, but my wife is learning to compensate,
(I`m going to bed and if you`re not there within 10 mins I`ll start without you)
I usually wait about 12 mins. Hey I`ve got depression but I`m not dead

There is nothing more reassuring than being with your soulmate, we should count ourselves lucky.

This is the beautiful lady on Lit that spurred me on,please take time to drop in.

Suggestions, pretty please
Oh, I agree with your first statement completely. I spent two years online after my little breakdown, it's what saved me from completely shutting down. I was able to let people in a little at a time, have a voice when I lived in silence, and not feel so shut off from the world because I really didn't want to be, it just happened.

Soulmates and friends and family are our greatest gifts. It drains them and leaves them feeling lost and helpless, but they never walk away. I work my tail off letting them know just what they mean to me and how deeply they are loved and appreciated. You have to keep on loving, you just have to.

edited because I never claimed to be a typist.

Again, thank you for being you, and for starting such a helpful thread.

Last edited by intrigued : 01-07-2005 at 09:27 AM.
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Old 01-07-2005, 09:44 AM   #25
Quoll
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Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: That's where I live.
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Quote:
Originally posted by DLL
Quoll...i thought about what makes people happy..sad..heres a few thoughts
So many people give definitions of success and argue over what makes one successful. I always thought the answer was rather obvious. To be successful, you must be happy. Okay, then what does it mean to be happy? This took some more thought. There are three main schools of thought about happiness. The first is that material goods bring happiness. I dismissed this theory immediately.

The other two theories are more plausible. The second is that happiness is given by some thing. There are different sub-theories about what this thing is. The most common are love, religion, helping others, and your work. This theory seemed to be on the right track, but something was wrong. The third theory was that happiness was just a state of mind, and that to be happy you must simply think you are happy. I personally believed this was a load of horse droppings, but further speculation led me to believe that there may be some truth in it. However, if I was to find the answer, I believed I must delve deeper into the second theory.

I analyzed one of the sub-theories-religion. Priests tell us that we are given happiness by belief in God. If it doesn’t work, then the priests say your belief isn’t strong enough. That didn’t seem quite right. Of course it makes priests happy, I thought. That’s what makes them priests. I started to look at some of the other sub-theories and noticed a pattern. Authors said it was their work. Philanthropists said it was helping others. I had found the answer to happiness. There is one thing that makes everyone happy, but it varies from person to person.

Therefore, achieving happiness is a simple (on paper, anyway) four-step process. First, you must find what it is that makes you happy. This is actually easier if you are unhappy. If you are happy, enjoy it and stop reading this. If you are unhappy, then it is a simple process of elimination. Look at all the things you have. It’s not any of those. If you are not yet certain what it is that makes you happy, try some of the common things-love, religion, etc. You should have it narrowed down to one eventually.

Next you must get the thing that makes you happy. I cannot offer too much advice on this, because it will vary from person to person, but I will say to take risks and focus on your goal.

The next step is to affirm that this is what makes you happy. You will experience an unusual, but pleasant sensation, because for the first time in your life you will be truly happy. It should be rather obvious. If it is not, now is the time to start over. Otherwise, affirm that this is what makes you happy.

The final step should be obvious if you did step three properly. Strangely, this is where most people mess up. It shouldn’t be that way. You are now happy, you know what it is that makes you happy, and you know you need to hold on to that, or at least you should. You must remember what makes you happy, and not make stupid decisions. If it comes to a choice between this thing and anything else you must choose this. If you fail in this step, return to step two.

This is where the third theory comes into play. While you are keeping what makes you happy, BE HAPPY! Remember step three? This makes you happy. Stop worrying about everything else. There are also other factors that will stop you from being happy. The biggest, and least obvious, is morality. Unfortunately, I cannot give a clear definition of morality as I did for happiness, as this will vary widely. But I can give some guidelines. The basic definition of morality, at least to me, is that something is immoral when it causes someone else harm. Therefore, you need to think carefully before your actions. There are no clear-cut rules, such as “You shalt not lie!” because the truth may cause harm. Another rule I find helpful is to find one final rule to live by, so when all else fails and you wonder if you can live with yourself, you at least still have that. For example, I have my word. If I give someone my word one something, I will not break it. Period.

Well, what are you waiting for? I defined success, happiness, and morality for you. Now go and find what makes you happy!





now lets think of more sex slang
Dear Luscious Lady you have cured me, no longer am I depressed, confused as all shit, but not depressed.
When I get up off the floor I am going to have my favourite 3 course meal, Hair pie, hot crumpet and self saucing pud.
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