The Author's Hangout Vending Machine

[TE999]

Originally Posted by slyc_willie

And you get back a complete set of hubcaps for a 1974 Caddillac Coupe DeVillie

I put in a bottle of asprin

And you get back a bottle of after-shave.

I put in a bag of roasted peanuts.

[TE999]

Originally Posted by glynndah

And you get someone to appreciate that silky skin.

I put in a cup of thick and creamy home-made eggnog.

And you get back a brimming tumbler of Captain Morgan Rum.

I put in a 'Get Out of Jail Free' card.

[RogueLurker]

Originally Posted by TE999

And you get back a brimming tumbler of Captain Morgan Rum.

I put in a 'Get Out of Jail Free' card.

And you get OJ Simpson ....

I put in a big bag of pistachios ...

[TE999]

Originally Posted by RogueLurker

And you get OJ Simpson ....

I put in a big bag of pistachios ...

And you get the DVD of 'The Muppets Do the Nutcracker'.

I put in a porcelain seahorse.

[RogueLurker]

Originally Posted by TE999

And you get the DVD of 'The Muppets Do the Nutcracker'.

I put in a porcelain seahorse.

And you get an aquarium of sea monkeys

I put in the mystery box from our move that has not been unpacked (we moved in six years ago).

[kiten69]

Originally Posted by RogueLurker

And you get an aquarium of sea monkeys

I put in the mystery box from our move that has not been unpacked (we moved in six years ago).

And you get that double ended dildo you thought you misplaced

I put in all of my Christmas receipts (damn I spent too much )

[The_Fool]

Originally Posted by kiten69

And you get that double ended dildo you thought you misplaced

I put in all of my Christmas receipts (damn I spent too much )

And get out a recipe for an overly nasty fruitcake.....(that is truly redundant)


I put in all the used cell phones I've been saving for some stupid reason.

[The_Darkness]

Originally Posted by kiten69

And you get that double ended dildo you thought you misplaced

I put in all of my Christmas receipts (damn I spent too much )

You get an over-sexed mid-westerner.

I put in a shredded fishnet stocking.

[RogueLurker]

Originally Posted by The_Darkness

You get an over-sexed mid-westerner.

I put in a shredded fishnet stocking.

you get the lamp from A Christmas Story

I put in set of silk pajamas ...

[The_Darkness]

Originally Posted by RogueLurker

you get the lamp from A Christmas Story

I put in set of silk pajamas ...

You get the Fool's cell phones

I put it in....er put in.....my assistant from work.

[glynndah]

Originally Posted by The_Fool

And get out a recipe for an overly nasty fruitcake.....(that is truly redundant)


I put in all the used cell phones I've been saving for some stupid reason.

And get back a pink Princess phone.

I put in a Christmas mug "1999 - Party of the Century"

[The_Darkness]

Originally Posted by glynndah

And get back a pink Princess phone.

I put in a Christmas mug "1999 - Party of the Century"

You get a Mayan Calendar for the year 2013.

I put in three dirty pennies.

[glynndah]

Originally Posted by The_Darkness

You get a Mayan Calendar for the year 2013.

I put in three dirty pennies.

And get 3 seconds of dirty talk.

I put in a box of ribbons.

[The_Darkness]

You get a package of bent scissors

I put in my old computer.

[glynndah]

Originally Posted by The_Darkness

You get a package of bent scissors

I put in my old computer.

And get back an AM transistor radio.

I"d put in two cats but the slot isn't big enough, so I'll drop in the mouse they were chasing and the vase they broke while doing it.

[The_Darkness]

Originally Posted by glynndah

And get back an AM transistor radio.

I"d put in two cats but the slot isn't big enough, so I'll drop in the mouse they were chasing and the vase they broke while doing it.

You get a bottle of superglue

I put in my shredded financial statements for the last year.

[glynndah]

Originally Posted by The_Darkness

You get a bottle of superglue

I put in my shredded financial statements for the last year.

And get a brand new $2.00 bill.


I put in a bottle of pink sparkly nail polish.

[The_Darkness]

Originally Posted by glynndah

And get a brand new $2.00 bill.


I put in a bottle of pink sparkly nail polish.

And you get a CD of Ralph Nader's political speeches

I put in three used ink cartridges

[glynndah]

Originally Posted by The_Darkness

And you get a CD of Ralph Nader's political speeches

I put in three used ink cartridges

And get a calliraphy pen set.

I put in a brand new key.

[TE999]

Originally Posted by glynndah

And get a calliraphy pen set.

I put in a brand new key.

And you get a CD of "Melanie's Greatest Hits'.

I put in a broken alarm clock.

[glynndah]

Originally Posted by TE999

And you get a CD of "Melanie's Greatest Hits'.

I put in a broken alarm clock.

And you get incense and peppermints.

I put in a white rabbit.

[TE999]

Originally Posted by glynndah

And you get incense and peppermints.

I put in a white rabbit.

And you get an autographed copy of 'Gracie Slick: My life and times".


I put in a orange bean-bag chair.

[glynndah]

Originally Posted by TE999

And you get an autographed copy of 'Gracie Slick: My life and times".


I put in a orange bean-bag chair.

And got avocado shag carpeting in the back of your van.

I put in 96 tears.

[TE999]

Originally Posted by glynndah

And got avocado shag carpeting in the back of your van.

I put in 96 tears.

And you get '?', minus the Mysterians.

I put in a pink Nehru jacket.

[glynndah]

Originally Posted by TE999

And you get '?', minus the Mysterians.

I put in a pink Nehru jacket.

And you get love beads and a peace sign pendant.

I put in my Make Love, Not War bumper sticker.