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Old 02-08-2015, 10:07 AM   #1
michael2956
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How to have an affair

I've tried Ashley Madison and Craigslist, but no takers. I NEED to meet a discrete woman who, like me, is trapped in a loveless, sexless marriage that she can't leave. How/where do you meet a such a woman? Any advice will be appreciated.
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Old 02-08-2015, 10:21 AM   #2
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You have my sympathies. I've been in your situation myself, minus the seeking an affair part. I won't patronise you with a list of suggestion to fix your situation. As I'm sure you've already exhausted all possibilities to do something about it. Certainly there are plenty of threads that explore your options.

If however you do decide to meet up with someone words of caution. Firstly I have a friend who engages in that kind of activity all the time. True, he isn't the sharpest tool in the box but he has to date been caught many times, indeed every time. There's always fall out, either from his wife or the mistress.

Secondly, if you do find someone you connect with and who is everything you've ever missed in your existing marriage there's a good possibility that she could quickly beco,e the object of your affections and that occasional meet ups quickly become unfulfilling a d you'll want or she'll want more.

Just something to keep in mind. But like I say, I do sympathise with your situation and hope you find what you're looking for.
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Old 02-08-2015, 03:09 PM   #3
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I first want to offer my sympathies for your situation, as it must be incredibly difficult to feel as if you are stuck.

That said, I did want to caution you that historically, the culture of HT is such that cheating on one's SO isn't an option that is typically endorsed. The common stance is that it is better to leave the relationship than it is to cheat.

This is most likely not the advice you wish to hear, but given the type of people who regularly congregate here, this is the type of advice you will most likely hear (with a few exceptions). Most HT regulars are pretty sexually open minded, but cheating goes against the ethics most seem to hold, and you are more likely to receive more replies as to why you shouldn't.

In closing, I'll wish you luck in finding a way out of such an unfulfilling marriage.
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Old 02-08-2015, 03:48 PM   #4
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Just to clarify, Are you are a woman trapped in a loveless, sexless, marriage that you can't leave and you are looking to meet a discrete woman or are you a man trapped in a loveless, sexless marriage and you are looking for a woman in the same boat?
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Old 02-08-2015, 04:13 PM   #5
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Just to clarify, Are you are a woman trapped in a loveless, sexless, marriage that you can't leave and you are looking to meet a discrete woman or are you a man trapped in a loveless, sexless marriage and you are looking for a woman in the same boat?
Not understanding why gender would need to be clarified?
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Old 02-08-2015, 04:32 PM   #6
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Not understanding why gender would need to be clarified?
Maybe subwannabe is interested in the OPs request.

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Old 02-08-2015, 04:40 PM   #7
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Originally Posted by michael2956
I've tried Ashley Madison and Craigslist, but no takers.
How's your game? When you contact women, do you actually send a message worth responding to, or are you a "Hi, how are you?" kinda guy?
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Old 02-08-2015, 05:38 PM   #8
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How's your game? When you contact women, do you actually send a message worth responding to, or are you a "Hi, how are you?" kinda guy?
Very valuable point.
Those short messages won't get you much answers. I dare say most women delete them instantly.
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Old 02-08-2015, 06:43 PM   #9
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I NEED to meet a discrete woman ...
Unless conjoined, most women are discrete. But discreet women won't blab on you.
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Old 02-08-2015, 08:54 PM   #10
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Old 02-09-2015, 03:42 AM   #11
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Old 02-09-2015, 04:46 AM   #12
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How's your game? When you contact women, do you actually send a message worth responding to, or are you a "Hi, how are you?" kinda guy?
Would also like to know the OPs answer to this one. We all might have tips for you on things women are looking for.
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Old 02-09-2015, 05:04 AM   #13
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Females want you or they don't. And what they want is already decided.
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Old 02-09-2015, 05:27 AM   #14
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Unless conjoined, most women are discrete. But discreet women won't blab on you.
I love knowing I'm not the only pedant in the village.
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Old 02-09-2015, 07:58 AM   #15
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I love knowing I'm not the only pedant in the village.
I know, right?
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Old 02-09-2015, 08:01 AM   #16
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Very valuable point.
Those short messages won't get you much answers. I dare say most women delete them instantly.
Quote:
Originally Posted by SweetSam42 View Post
Would also like to know the OPs answer to this one. We all might have tips for you on things women are looking for.
But I also understand why some men don't want to put the effort into a more original approach/greeting. There's often very little return on the investment. It's a numbers game; any woman who doesn't appear to be a bot or spammer is going to be overwhelmed with messages.
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Old 02-09-2015, 08:08 AM   #17
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But I also understand why some men don't want to put the effort into a more original approach/greeting. There's often very little return on the investment. It's a numbers game; any woman who doesn't appear to be a bot or spammer is going to be overwhelmed with messages.
I've noticed that, it seems if you are female and have a pulse you better baton down the hatches as a storm of PM's approach! I've seen so many guys grow despondent at the lack of replies whilst women bemoan the utter scale of messages. I have been a touch more fortunate in that almost every message I send gets a reply, but then I am not actually looking for nakedness or a sly meeting in a hotel.

Saying that, it doesn't take THAT much effort to send a message that's a little bit more thoughtful than show us your tits!
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Old 02-10-2015, 10:37 AM   #18
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Would also like to know the OPs answer to this one. We all might have tips for you on things women are looking for.
I can relate to the opening post. Currently on AM and of the many messages sent only had one reply back.

Certainly interested in hearing the lovely tips offered from a female perspective.
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Old 02-10-2015, 10:50 AM   #19
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Originally Posted by michael2956 View Post
I've tried Ashley Madison and Craigslist, but no takers. I NEED to meet a discrete woman who, like me, is trapped in a loveless, sexless marriage that she can't leave. How/where do you meet a such a woman? Any advice will be appreciated.
Regardless of whether it's an affair or not, finding a lover for any kind of relationship is not like ordering a hamburger, there has to be at least some compatibility/attraction. You meet a woman for an affair like you meet a woman for any kind of relationship. How did you meet the wife you have now? Stop ordering hamburgers on Craigslist and start getting to know the people around you. Friends first, lovers later.
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Old 02-10-2015, 10:56 AM   #20
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Plenty of women sell it online. I caught my CPA neighbor selling pussy after she lost her job. Her driveway was always fulla cars, many stayed all night. Plenty were cops. I got curious, went looking, and found her website. $500 all nite, $150 an hour. A good piece of ass is worth $200. Dates cost that much and you gotta feed the bitch.
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Old 02-10-2015, 03:34 PM   #21
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Plenty of women sell it online. I caught my CPA neighbor selling pussy after she lost her job. Her driveway was always fulla cars, many stayed all night. Plenty were cops. I got curious, went looking, and found her website. $500 all nite, $150 an hour. A good piece of ass is worth $200. Dates cost that much and you gotta feed the bitch.

".....and you gotta feed the bitch." Aren't you the smooth talker? I find it soooooo hard to believe that you would ever have to resort to paying for it.
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Old 02-10-2015, 04:35 PM   #22
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I can relate to the opening post. Currently on AM and of the many messages sent only had one reply back.

Certainly interested in hearing the lovely tips offered from a female perspective.
What kinds of messages are you sending?
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Old 02-10-2015, 05:14 PM   #23
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".....and you gotta feed the bitch." Aren't you the smooth talker? I find it soooooo hard to believe that you would ever have to resort to paying for it.
I pay to eat out, I pay for taxis, I pay for lotsa things I already got. I've bought lotsa pussy in my life. Dinner and a movie costs about the same as sex. Sometimes I just wanna buy fish at the market and skip the fishing trip.
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Old 02-10-2015, 08:16 PM   #24
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I pay to eat out, I pay for taxis, I pay for lotsa things I already got. I've bought lotsa pussy in my life. Dinner and a movie costs about the same as sex. Sometimes I just wanna buy fish at the market and skip the fishing trip.
I dunno. I just can't get on board with paying a woman for something she supposedly enjoys as much as I do. And if she isn't enjoying it, that's a turn off for me too. For me, the seduction is a big part of sex. I guess I just like the chase!
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Old 02-11-2015, 03:51 AM   #25
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I dunno. I just can't get on board with paying a woman for something she supposedly enjoys as much as I do. And if she isn't enjoying it, that's a turn off for me too. For me, the seduction is a big part of sex. I guess I just like the chase!
Many enjoy sex with sundry partners, and the money is good if her alternative is minimum wage and part-time hours. If you think about it few people enjoy the work they do for us but we're plenty satisfied with the results.
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