Do you have any limits in your play?

Appologies for this being a bit of a one liner, but i'm feeling lazy this afternoon. I have two questions though

1. Do you have any limits in your play,(play being a very generic word I know) and if so, what are they?

2. What fantasy session/situation have you imagined but haven't been able to create or fulfill yet.

Thanks

Max

Maximumtest said:

Appologies for this being a bit of a one liner, but i'm feeling lazy this afternoon. I have two questions though

1. Do you have any limits in your play,(play being a very generic word I know) and if so, what are they?

2. What fantasy session/situation have you imagined but haven't been able to create or fulfill yet.

Thanks

Max

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Depends. With my Domme, I have no limits. With other play partners, I have many. Some are my own limits, some are enforced limits.

My own limits include blindfolds (I'm deaf and taking away that much of my senses is too much with casual partners), canes (my fav implement, but a bad past experience has left it something only particular people can do to me), ageplay (squicks me), gags (asthma). There are others, I can't think of them ATM.

Enforced limits include being touched sexually without my Domme's permission, orgasms (orgasms belong to her and only her, always...I'm not even allowed to give myself one), vaginal penetration (again, belongs to her and only her), and biting (her sign of ownership).

I don't include things like scat, animals, etc in my limits list because I think of them as entirely separate fetishes outside of BDSM, thus, I don't even consider them. If they were something I wanted, I would seek out people that also advertise those same interests.

As to your second question....serving my Domme sexually, being fucked with a strapon...are some fantasies that will likely happen but I have not been allowed as of yet.

general: scat, compression-based breathplay, breathplay to passing out, anything I generally deem unsafe bad karma or feel uncomfortable doing.

I can't do some of the things I used to love because I am on drugs that regulate my immune system, so, sadly with all but my most intimate contacts, enemas, assplay, piercing, etc. are all out, basically any body-invasive play.

Anal sex. Not to brag about what a lucky little sub I am, but my Dom's fairly well-endowed and every time we tried it, it just hurt miserably and left me crying for about five minutes afterwards.

Also scat, swallowing urine (for some reason I was able to do this for a few days but I think I did too much too soon and now I can't do it anymore), drawing blood, breathplay, being temporarily given away to another man (women are okay)... just to name a few.

I think we all have limits, athough somtimes it doesn't feel that way. I hate scat and it makes me puke but it's not a limit. Death isn't a limit either, although I wouldn't give that away casually (i.e. to just anyone). Very extreme prolonged torture before death would be a limit for me, however. Inquisition-style torture, bone-crushing, washed in acid, that sort of horror. Pain is much harder to take, I think, if you see extreme direct results from it--like your body disintegrating in front of you. I also have an irrational fear of irons. Don't want to have a hot one pressed against me! :/

I've done a lot but there's a great deal I haven't gone near that I'd like to some day. Going to be brief here, because it'll ruin some of my stories to give too much of this stuff away. An "as-close-to-rape-as-possible" scene. Forced dry anal. Affixed with nails, large and small, to a fallen tree trunk: I imagine tongue, both nipples, both labia, maybe the webbing between the fingers and then whipped very hard. I love to thrash around and scream when I'm tortured, but the consequences of not holding perfectly still in this case would be pretty bad. It'd be quite a challenge! I'd enjoy some activities that involve humiliation and forced sluttery, i.e., taken to a gloryhole booth and put in service for the night or maybe even forced to pretend I'm a hooker and pick up some strange repulsive stranger and give him a blow job or more for a humiliatingly low fee while my "pimp" observed it all. That would be fun! OK, last one: the matches. I think it would be interesting, if not particularly enjoyable, to be tied on my back to a table, tight so I couldn't wiggle, and have someone drop lighted matches on my belly. Of course, he'd put them out if they managed to remain lit after they hit my skin, but when exactly to put them out would be up to his discretion.

My imagination

http://aaotracker.4players.de/Images/smilies/angel.gif

My limits...eeerrmm.....all the above mentioned fetishes that I don't particualry feel are of a BDSM nature solely, ie scat. Breath play, exhibishionism, public humiliation.

Too be honest, limits I think can change with time, and the person you are experiencing them, so I guess my answers would change over time.

Take B's response, copy it, and subtract the badassity, and that's me. I don't have any hard and fast limits anymore...it's all situational and what I can take. Sometimes that's really not very much--recently, plain ol' vaginal sex has been tearing me (have NO idea why) and he lets me stop at that point. Sometimes the line is much closer to the unsafe and he pushes it further. I feel comfortable enough with his morals so that I don't have to draw a "no kids" line, and I trust that if ever he were to push the scat thing, it would be for a damned good reason and with damned fine prep work, so I just kind of do what he wants. Doesn't mean I don't ever "red" out, just that it's all based on what's going on at the time.

Anything that would necessitate a hospital stay or involve non-consenting folks

I concur with an earlier post about limits being dependent upon the energy with the Dom/me/Top. However, as a general rule, anything that will warrant seeing a Doctor/going to the Hospital, or involving non-consenting folks, of whatever age, is a limit. And, without question, kids are out, Mikey Jackson has become my new best lead for a horror movie. Scat, piss, blood, depending on the context and RACK aspect, are all most certainly things I would and have pursued. While I'll do it and be grumpy about it, regardless of how wonderful the Dom/me/Top, I loathe wax.

I wouldn't say I have many personal limits.

I would do just about anything to a person if they wanted me to, I'm not sure if I have it in me to nail someone to a tree trunk and whip them, but I dont have a moral objection to it.

Like TB, I guess death would not even be a limit for me if I knew the person was down. This seems a really sick thought, but I actually had a dream the other night of a sub so docile that she lay down calmly so I could stab her in the chest and videotape it.

There are, however, a much more limited set of things I will coerce or force someone to do. I have no problems with minor pain, no problem with any form of humiliation that doesn't involve danger and no problem with forced bi or other sorts of behavioral change. Anything above that requires the expressly shown interest of the bottom.

Quint said:

Take B's response, copy it, and subtract the badassity, and that's me.

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AHem! And just what does bad-assity mean, young black wizard? :/ Also, what is "redding out?" New term for me.

It's like tapping out, only using your safeword.

KLA KLOW BIATCH!


(just happy to "get" something about bdsm that tb didn't)

Marquis said:

KLA KLOW BIATCH!


(just happy to "get" something about bdsm that tb didn't)

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Ok you win! I surrender. And... (blush) I have to ask yet another question. WTF is "tapping out?"

TaintedB said:

Ok you win! I surrender. And... (blush) I have to ask yet another question. WTF is "tapping out?"

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Tapping out is done in organized fighting when one fighter willfully submits to the other. Ususally done by tapping the ground three times, this means the fight is over and the ref is to step in before said fighter breaks something.

Also good to use as a safeword when the mouth is otherwise occupied.

Ah I see. In the professional fights I've watched (I'm a boxing fan) sometimes the fighter is far too groggy and gozno to remember to tap (also he's usually still on his feet, so there's nothing really to tap against), not that I've ever seen boxers tap, to tell you the truth. Maybe it's not traditional for that sort of fight. But it's the ref's job to watch for too-spaced-to-defend-oneself syndrome and stop the fight. No refs in bdsm though.

I'm kind of old-fashioned in some ways. I've never been given a safeword in the past, and probably wouldn't enjoy playing with someone who insisted on one. I figure if he isn't experienced enough to know how to read me for at least generic sub distress and if I'm incapable of just stating what specifically is going on with me ( as in: I'm going to throw up now, this pain feels like more than I can bear, bad emotional memory has reared its ugly head, I have a leg cramp, careful, I'm very fertile at this time of month, I hate this fucking song, etc.) then we probably shouldn't be playing together.

TaintedB said:

Ah I see. In the professional fights I've watched (I'm a boxing fan) sometimes the fighter is far too groggy and gozno to remember to tap (also he's usually still on his feet, so there's nothing really to tap against), not that I've ever seen boxers tap, to tell you the truth. Maybe it's not traditional for that sort of fight. But it's the ref's job to watch for too-spaced-to-defend-oneself syndrome and stop the fight. No refs in bdsm though.

I'm kind of old-fashioned in some ways. I've never been given a safeword in the past, and probably wouldn't enjoy playing with someone who insisted on one. I figure if he isn't experienced enough to know how to read me for at least generic sub distress and if I'm incapable of just stating what specifically is going on with me ( as in: I'm going to throw up now, this pain feels like more than I can bear, bad emotional memory has reared its ugly head, I have a leg cramp, careful, I'm very fertile at this time of month, I hate this fucking song, etc.) then we probably shouldn't be playing together.

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Tapping out is done in forms of fighting that utilize grappling.

I like safe words, I've always found subs have been willing to farther when they know they have an out if they really need to use it.

Marquis said:

Tapping out is done in forms of fighting that utilize grappling.

I like safe words, I've always found subs have been willing to farther when they know they have an out if they really need to use it.

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Gotcha about the tapping out. Now I have a keyword that I can use to impress other fighting fans with, should I ever need to.

Something I don't quite get: if the sub _doesn't_ have a safe word then theoretically they can go much farther than one who can, because they can't say no. Are you saying that if the sub doesn't have a safeword, you'll stop yourself long before she might if she had that word?

TaintedB said:

Gotcha about the tapping out. Now I have a keyword that I can use to impress other fighting fans with, should I ever need to.

Something I don't quite get: if the sub _doesn't_ have a safe word then theoretically they can go much farther than one who can, because they can't say no. Are you saying that if the sub doesn't have a safeword, you'll stop yourself long before she might if she had that word?

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No, I'm saying the sub will panic earlier and begin showing the "stop" signs prematurely.

AngelicAssassin said:

http://aaotracker.4players.de/Images/smilies/angel.gif

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You keep scaring me AA.

Marquis said:

No, I'm saying the sub will panic earlier and begin showing the "stop" signs prematurely.

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Exactly. And thank you for explaining my terminology in my absence. Next we will be working on dictation. Marquis, pen in hand?

B, we're getting better about reading body language accurately, but as I'm still pretty new to all this myself, sometimes what my body says can be deceptive--if I'm really freaking out but I can still take more, it's damned hard to catch the nuances, so it's nice to have code words to let him know when I'm REALLY really freaking out.

And it really ought to have been "badassidity..." on the pH level, you're far higher than I am. I'm quite often in awe; much of what you describe as either real life or probable future is what my darkest, "never to be" fantasies are made of. I'm a neophyte in comparison.

Exactly. And thank you for explaining my terminology in my absence. Next we will be working on dictation. Marquis, pen in hand?

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Yes, but can you guess what I'm going to do with it?

And it really ought to have been "badassidity..." on the pH level, you're far higher than I am. I'm quite often in awe; much of what you describe as either real life or probable future is what my darkest, "never to be" fantasies are made of. I'm a neophyte in comparison.

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TB is about as real as it gets for a rational and intelligent person.

To be honest I think you and I keep it pretty gangsta for our age, we'll get to the TB/AA level one day. Remember it only really seems kinky the first time...

Miss Diva said:

You keep scaring me AA.

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Why darlin'?

Quint said:

Exactly. And thank you for explaining my terminology in my absence. Next we will be working on dictation. Marquis, pen in hand?

B, we're getting better about reading body language accurately, but as I'm still pretty new to all this myself, sometimes what my body says can be deceptive--if I'm really freaking out but I can still take more, it's damned hard to catch the nuances, so it's nice to have code words to let him know when I'm REALLY really freaking out.

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I see what you mean about the code words (although I'm not going near your introductory statement. Nor do I need to, I get the feeling someone can do that just fine all by his lonesome. . FWIW, Marquis's comments got me into the right ballpark, at least. I was imagining "redding out" to be that situation where things in front of your eyes sometimes turn this kind of hazy red just prior to blankout.)

I was lucky in some ways, Quint, my first partner had been reading nuances for years before he met me so he had it down to a science; all I had to do was relax and be myself. I realize now what a luxury that was. I still can't deal well with safe words, though, (although I see and appreciate the distinction you're making between a safeword and a codeword) because they take out an element of unpredicatble control that is very erotic for me and for the people I tend to seek out, but there is one realistic situation in which I would "submit to" one: if my mind was going to be so strongly altered by some chemical that I thought my verbal abilities would be pretty much shot, I'd like to have some way to explain with something other than words or body language (which might be as psycho as my mind) that I thought something serious was going on.

But I don't know maybe not, even then. If you're going to be an intrepid traveller and all, there's some sense to the idea that've you've got learn to trust in yourself to deal with whatever you might encounter in strange lands.

I don't see myself as very bad-assity in the way you've described it. There's a whole lot of stuff, very simple stuff, that would be really hard for me to handle. One example is that mind-game Marquis described once doing to his subs: making them beat him. That would get me into 19th Nervous Breakdown territory in about five seconds flat. He's given an order, you can't disobey, and besides he clearly likes it and wants it. And yet to do it is so unnatural and wrong feeling inside your own psyche that it's tearing you to shreds. Non-consensual switching: shudder!