Old 09-18-2004, 12:27 AM   #151
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17/09.

my first review... be gentle with me LOL

John by Angeline I loved. The image and abstract way she placed her words really made this a gripping poem.

It's through time by lil_fire She has a few submissions, but this is by far my fave.

Abortion by Reltne Short, but very powerful words.

Battle Cry by irishcatsmeow Worth the read. I'm biased, I love dragons

Forbidden Love by harley23 I just loved this. The images were fantastic.

anamneses by ferociouskittycat Well I couldn't do my first review without a plug LOL

Understanding Salem's Witch Trials by Uncle Pervey Well worded, and a touching subject. I really liked this one.

Dancing Wildly by Belegon Just loved this.

Grapevine by Remec Very abstract, yet well worth the read.
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Old 09-18-2004, 01:37 PM   #152
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I saw this one bloom earlier in the week, and loved it then. Now I think Beginnings is perfect.

A really difficult subject when you aren't involved. knowing Ange like I do makes this a terriffic poem.

Thank you, Angeline Extraordinaire!!
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Old 09-19-2004, 12:16 PM   #153
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Sunday, September 19

There are nineteen new poems posted today. I'm reading 'em now and will be back with my favorites shortly.

Ok. I have returned.

Right off the bat, I read two poems by Liar, and--this will come as no surprize to fans of the dishonest one--they are both excellent.

To Wipe Tears is an apology that manages to be at once heartfelt and flippant. Who wouldn't smile and forgive someone who puts it this way?

Apology, mark my words,
not excuse.
Cuz it ain't no use
to sing that song
when I know
as the rest of the room
that I'm just plain
ding dong wrong.


His other poem, Equilibrium Intruded, which he claims to have writ on a long mind-numbing work night, is a wild tour de force of a brain fart. It gets a big, meaningless A from me. It's my must read recommendation of the day. The job is good for your poetry, dear Liar.

Slick and stinky,
sweet and soft
it lingered on confused buds,
sending scrambled signals back
up to my super ego,
unable to forego
it's own reaction
and sickening satisfaction
in all fruity forbidden fabulous
fuckitall fanfare
fanatic
fantasmagoria
fnah fnah fnah...


**********

There are also two wonderful poems from lostandfounder. I really like them both, so can't recommend one over the other, so just read them both. Hell, it's Sunday--what else are you doing?

The two poems sort of work together. Help Me is an urgent cry of a write, begging for release from too much what? World, life I think. We've all been there and can relate, I'm sure.

Let me lose myself
in a deep, obscene sea.
Ravish me. Fuck me.

Make me feel nothing
else! Make me scream your name

through these tears I shed.


That energy segues into the turning away of Apathy, which explains the poet's desparate need for diversion, and tells the reader where it all ends up. There are some interesting things happening with presentation here, too, which layers meaning. This is a rather spare poem, but very touching imho.

It’s the sWord and the bible
of the holy warrior.
Tired of thumping.
Tired of fighting
the god-damned good fight.
Dropping to his knees
To get his head chopped off.


**********

Two goodies also from annaswirls, whose anger in both is chemical and, in one of her submissions, scientifically accurate, rendering a sort of poetic alchemy. The woman is a wizard.

There's Amino Acid, which sciences up anger with anna's usual tongue-twisting sorcery:

spilled into boiling pot
my enzymes denatured, curled
into coils of egg white solid
their twisting tertiary structure
cannot be reversed


and then there's clench, which is too short to break up and give you a piece of here, so just read it, aight? In spite of its brevity, it has the effect of nails on a chalkboard.

**********

wildtiger has two submissions today. One of them, Her First Child could do--it seemed to me--with some editing, but it is a strong, wrenching piece of writing.

he was a handsome little boy
just in them 20 short weeks he brought her so much joy
she had a card with his hand and foot print
at the bottome was his name
but it will not be the same
with out him.


**********

Finally, I love PatCarrington's poem, Eagle Eyes, and not just cause of the title either. It's a beautiful piece, filled with strong imagery that speaks to the senses, and is presented (which I--technical dope--cannot recreate here) so as to suggest the soaring flight of an eagle.

and survive. The birth of earth and flight,
the nutrition of time and stomach, are

theirs,
to remember and cherish,
to flaunt,
to burn the air.


**********

These are just my recommendations. You may find other poems that speak to you, as these did to me. Be sure to read, vote, and comment or send feedback. We love you for it.

Happy Sunday & to tungtied


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Old 09-19-2004, 02:51 PM   #154
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Ahem.....our Sunday reviewer neglected to mention three very different and worthy poems.

First an erotic romp with bubbles.Sparacuous then a meditation on Fall and remembered youth Her Shadow Speaks and, last but not least Things to Do on Tuesday - a wry diary of a work day.

All well worth reading, more than once here.
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Old 09-19-2004, 03:08 PM   #155
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Of Angeline's three, my favorite is Her Shadow Speaks which is vintage Angeline in image quality, flow, and evocative memories.
Quote:
...
My shadow smiles at me.

Even if I can't see it,
I know it's wry
because this must be
how Peter Pan felt
when he grew up.
- How did she know? How did she find me? I changed my name when I left the island and sold it to Michael Jackson.

Reltne (aka Pete)

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a Peom? buy Reltne: Missed Migration - 318 views, but only 8 votes and 4 comments.


What's another word for thesaurus? . . .for synonym?
What's another word for cliché? . . .that isn't trite or hackneyed?
What if there weren't any hypothetical questions?

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Old 09-21-2004, 09:46 AM   #156
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new poems, Monday

okay you all, I am still trying to post the thing here, having no luck. There werent many new poems yesterday, read them all but I will keep trying...


Angeline blessed us with 3 poems, of those, terzanelle Espana is my favorite. Her descriptions made me want to shuck my flannel shirt and grab a gauzey linen dress and just languish on those steps in catalonia. This is a beautiful piece from a very talented poet, read and enjoy

my only suggestion would be to move that comma from the edge of smokey blue, to the edge of painted,

also check our her summer Sonnet and Bye Bye Bluesbird ( which I do not feel qualified to comment on anyway!!)

~~~~
The Willow is a Woman by PatCarrington is a must read. I have yet to read anything by Pat that I didnt enjoy and this one, well, it feels as though he plucked it right out of my very own soul. excellent poetry
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Old 09-21-2004, 09:59 AM   #157
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TUESDAY REVIEWS 9/21/04

Good morning, boys and girls, and significant others.

There are 11 New Poems this morning. That makes me happy, because my hair is an untamed, unfixable mess, and I needed something to balance the scales.

DISCLAIMER I am not responsible for anything I say or do on bad-hair days.

The first poem on the list is Tathagata's Morphine Rain , which our master of letters decided deserves an E. I do not agree, but that's nothing new. The only E I can remember agreeing with was Angeline's Nightingale.

I love Tath's work, but in my opinion, this is not a good effort from him. I read a poem from him last week that needed an E next to it. Here it is. Mad Poet: Lynn Mass. 1980's

This poem has some nice moments, particularly the final stanza, but there are so many hyphen and formatting errors (I count a dozen or so), and some hazy imagery not typical of Tath.

All in all, it is certainly well worth reading.

And we nod,
blissful and benign,
and acquiesce
to the enthralling hymn
of surrender.



Early Freeze by champagne1982 is a beautifully-written poem about an early Septemeber frost, superbly handled by the poet in terse and controlled language. A MUST READ.

Did the aurora dance gleefully
across the starlit sky,
as the cold front slipped in beneath
the glowing mantle
flung across her shoulders?



Liar , in a 4 am goodnight vow makes tender and wistful promises to himself. It is lovely. Read it.

tomorrow
I will try
to fall
in love

and do my very best
to bask in still
veiled glow



A brand new poet, twobear, gives us I Came To Celebrate. There are many, many wonderful lines and thoughts here, but the poem is not well-structured, and needs a major haircut. This has the makings of a powerhouse piece of poetry if properly compressed and built. Read it. I promise you will see many lines you love.

I came to celebrate

after everything there is to be said
there are the songs the blood sings; the light, the darkness,
a sort of gorgeous mess.



Framed Perspective by Catbabe is a wonderfuly-written narrative of a man seriously injured in a flood, trying to save a piece of art work precious to his wife. It is a MUST READ.

He covers internal chasms
with a mix of pride and love, and
nobody hears the pain, only the
plastic pillows crinkle
in the quiet, filling
the prescribed pause, while
rubber fingers feel for the pulse
in the paling room.



PatCarrington's Chipped Mountain is a beautifully-written and balanced story of a mountain preacher and his building of a small church. I am not a religiously-oriented person, but religious or not, the gorgeous alliterative flow and superb language make this a MUST READ.

When those tones of devotion echo
through the canyon, into the valleys,
and they climb and fly in flocks
from their lost and lonely houses
to share these sacred stones



You Listen by dreamsweet is a nice read about the difficulties of communication between lovers. Give it a try.

My life is hinged on your world,
involuntarily.
For every time that I try to disconnect,
something (the tiniest thing) subtly intervenes,



A Kiss! by Uncle Pervey is a switch from his usual style, and a shift that I like.


That's it....unless more poems pop up (shhhhhh!)

Anna has been kind enough to offer to take my place reviewing next Tuesday, and probably the Tuesday after that also, while I travel. Thank you, dear friend Anna.

Those of you who have not seen Anna's new website, mannequin envy , give it a try. Anna has the MOON CHALLENGE POEMS there. I recently read them all, and they are wonderful....every one!!

peace, love, and white wishes Tara
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Old 09-21-2004, 02:38 PM   #158
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Jeez, thanks for the plug Tara! I was going to PM you-- I missed a poem, a good good poem, if you could check it out, I feel awful that you missed it -- it was all my fault.


I stopped in to second one of Tara's recommendations:

[color=[purple]I Came To Celebrate [/color]


two bear
two bear
two bear


please give a welcome, I really want this poet to stay.


Mannequins naughty sister site is in the works. My AV is a little pre-view.


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Old 09-21-2004, 05:11 PM   #159
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The first poem on the list is Tathagata's Morphine Rain , which our master of letters decided deserves an E. I do not agree, but that's nothing new. The only E I can remember agreeing with was Angeline's Nightingale.

I love Tath's work, but in my opinion, this is not a good effort from him. I read a poem from him last week that needed an E next to it. Here it is. Mad Poet: Lynn Mass. 1980's


Thank you sweety. I kinda feel that way about Eve's Into the Mountains--anyone who hasn't read it should. Now. lol.

And I'd have given 5 Es to Tath's Mad Poet poem. It's an incredible piece of writing, obviously written by a mad monkey--er poet.




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Old 09-22-2004, 12:42 PM   #160
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Wednesday, Sept 22—New Poems

Morning Poets -

I'm going to keep this short.


21 poems today on the New Poems page to read and enjoy.



~ ~ ~


one wish by normal jean ©
I don't think one wish is too much to grant for someone as deserving as miss jean—I would if I could. The whole poem has such wonderful imagery that I actually saw it come true (some where in my imagination).
Quote:
one wish

and it’s a June rain, barefoot thing
past the undertow into the waves,
and foamy surf licks up against
pilate girls' knees, it looks like fun,

but all I want to do is run,
and run and run,
and run
dimensions by Senna Jawa ©
Senna Jawa earned his first little editor's "E" on his sharp and lean poem. He aslo submitted: she peacefully..., threeway, and a care*free song


Dragon Princess by The Mutt ©
Is a fairy tale-like narrative poem with colorful, textured language.


mahogany autumn by echoes_s ©
This poem was also very colorful in imagery, as well as a piece with some powerful tone—which was on the dark side.
Quote:
mahogany autumn
sighing in darkened shadows
a willing captive
tender, eager, hungry
Before The Inhale by Liar ©
On two occasions I had to refer to my trusty pop-up Webster in this potent hard-as-a-rock tactile imagery poem. (The bold, "diabase" is now added to my vocab)
Quote:
So now,
I will incarcerate
my incandescence,
suffocate the flames

and lull a raging mountain
to sleep.

Anchor this tundra soul,
granite and diabase tether.
What Madness by tungtied2u ©
We all know the back story on this poem—a piece that I'm sure channeled the dark theme and tone it was born. Again, Tung, my condolences and thoughts are with ya.
Quote:
This is personal
Impersonal
Two people in one person
One, so gentle
Adoring
The other, a beast unleashed
One Window by Angeline ©
In the two years I've been a member at Lit, I've rarely read a poem by Ange with such a heavy-hearted tone as the forementioned, sharp metaphoric piece. Perhaps I read it wrong—it's been known to happen... a lot. Count the various metaphors she used in this piece, and look up their definitions—it's something worth learning from this poet. (Is there a website to look up such symbols and metaphors?)
Quote:
I am among a world of foreigners,
struggling through days that shift
underfoot. Moments toll like prayer,
sway invitation like fields of seaflowers,
beautiful as they are deadly to navigate.

They cut me, blood wells
even as the ocean sings love songs,
sparkling sharp in sapphire pools.
carved wood by annaswirls ©
Were you on one of your vintage shopping sprees, miss anna? You find such interesting things to write and take photos of. I'd like to see this wooden carving you wrote about...

if it doesn't exist—you sure fooled me
Quote:
always having envied
carved circus figures
that never had to leave

wished flesh into wood
and a pose that would turn his
into the same.
~ ~ ~


That's it, my opinion of what I thought was good and/or interesting reading for Wednesday. Please take your time and support your own kind.


- neo

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Old 09-23-2004, 05:00 PM   #161
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New shtuff Thursday Sep 23

Ok, hello Thursday. Let's see what we've got here...19 new poems counted. And dayum what a collection. Hold onto yer hats...


______________

What Is and What Is Not by Toward A Word is an intriguing look into a disturbed mind. A poem starting in comfortable decadence, and then descending...
scrawled graffitti
brutal decadence
naked need
pleading for pain
if only to feel something
anything

pity them
pity himself


_____

flyguy69 shows us in Night Breeze how erotic poetry should be done. As some comments already state, this could be a haunting memory, a dream, an alluring fantasy...but for all I know it just might be the real thing, clouded in the veil of half sleep. Either way, it's a beautiful write and sensuality in words when it's as good as it can get.
Across the water, the mainland
Greece. I know it's there
I see it in the morning
When the sun shines


_____

The View is Whisky7up first poem on Lit, after a handful of well written stories. It's an elegantly restrained piece that shows off a good grasp for descriptive imagery.
Across the water, the mainland
Greece. I know it's there
I see it in the morning
When the sun shines


_____


Tears on a Red Oak is another solid effort by PatCarrington. A lush homage to trees and by proxy, the circle of all things living. This is not his best effort, and one that could to with some pruning. But even then it still kicks ass. And on the other hand, maybe it should be allowed to grow just as wild as the trees it's about?
You grew together, burning in the sun,
using the pleasant shade, sparkling
with royalty and wearing the leaves
of his rounded crown to sit and court
a sky-eyed princess to marry.


_____



BooMerengue goes iambic. The Fall is a villanelle, or something similar - I can never tell those thingamabobs apart. Whatever it is called, it is one of those terribly restraining forms in which you (read 'I') simply can not write good poetry. But she does. Here is a strong, poignant story told with a tangibly rich language, flirting with (but never actually becoming) hyperboles. It has, through the chills of what's told, a very warm and distinct style that has become Boo's signum in my eyes.
One cannot know what depths a soul may seek.
The days unwinding leaves its tortured mark
As night looks on, yet does not dare to speak.

This wearied traveller, though his heart is weak
Will stumble blindly, groping in the dark.
One cannot know what depths a soul may seek.


_____

Voice Of The Ages by hippiedude succeeds where almost every tourist brochure fails, to capture the grandeur and essence of nature in mere words.
But it is difficult to speak of such things,
how the presence of wilderness lays bare the soul
and speaks truth about the nature of beauty,
the privilege to embrace what you can not hold,
to possess what you will never own,


_____

natural_indigo is a new poet here on Lit, and one that shows some real promise. In Nature's Motion simple words and basic structure, is giving something as basic as wind enchanting, sensual dimensions. Well penned, and I hope to see more from this poet soon.

_____

& last but not least, jd4george has three very different poems up for grabs today.

* Whispers at Two Lights is short, sharp, beautiful and haunting.

* First Jump tells the story of an adrenaline rush and a creeping panic colliding. Madlib humoristic wit with a twist.

* Salvador Dali is dead is the real gem though. In today's very strong competition this is the best poem of the day. I'm not even going to try and describe it. Just read the damn thing.
Salvador Dali is dead
and 'neath the melting clocks
and kept time of these sallowed things
no body seemed to notice
blue shirts sweat and one woman's smile
mourning it was -- morning
that glistened
chainlink speckles and lost fantasies
rainbows that are sucked into
the soaked blue shirts
with grimaced smiles



#L
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Old 09-24-2004, 06:37 PM   #162
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September 24, 2004

I counted 26 new poems today. These are the ones that I liked best.

Grandma’s Vines by PatCarrington is just good in every way, up to and including a perfect ending. Pat writes poetry that is lush with image and metaphor. It’s very sensuous stuff, his writing, and a gift to the reader who is so easily afforded the sight, taste, feel of his words.

Digits gnarled and knotted
like mature Italian grapevines,
her purple veins are the juice
of time and precision
flowing from her spouts
and their knobbed knuckles,
skin shaded by Tuscan plums
and wrinkled with its figs.


**********

Crumbs by irishcatsmeow is a strong sustained metaphor. I especially like that it’s not maudlin in the least. This poem delivers its message with an acerbic bite that’s tangy but not bitter. (Maybe I should start dinner soon. lol).

You don’t understand
why the scraps once held,
no longer serve me.
A ravenous appetite
demands satiation.
Credence gives hope
for a feast never before known.


**********

OpheliaQuieroz’s poem, Savage Jewels, on the other hand transcends angry into dangerous. It’s excellent writing, imo, because its very disturbing message is delivered with precise control--it’s a cold anger. That somehow makes it even more shocking.

Gentlemen, read on at your own risk of leg-crossing.

Later we can dry them in the oven
till they’re hard and black
then bind them in chains of silver
and hang them
savage jewels
from my ears
I’ll wear them with my mother’s pearls
for luncheon at the Ritz-Carleton
with Mila and the girls


**********

Ask Alice by SelenaKittyn is tongue-in-cheek (well you know what I mean…I think) erotic; a strong sexy piece of writing that plays off Alice in Wonderland with wonderful imagery.

Taste those words
in your distant mouth.
They're hot,
jalapeno, salsa, wasabi
Yeah, that kind of heat--
your tongue goes numb
your throat's on fire
your chest burns.
No liquid courage,
no Alice-drink
will open this door,


**********

That’s my opinion. You may find others that grab you. Read, vote, and feedback/comment, you poets. Take care of each other and have a happy weekend.


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Old 09-24-2004, 07:21 PM   #163
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Ange forgot (I wonder why) one of the very best poems of the day.

So here Memory Like Skin it is.

es to you, sweet Angeline.
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Old 09-25-2004, 07:15 AM   #164
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My Mentions...

Good morning, everyone! It's a fine day to read poetry, and I have some good ones to tell you about!

A little humor from a new poet...

Ode To Daisy Jones by Lloyd2004

and 9 from BloodieKisses

And then Liar gives us some HOT erotica in Half Moon Spell
my favorite...
"between a raven black sky
and a crimson black sea."
Those lines seem to be another magical poem starting, imho.

Frosted Moon by Tristesse is packed with imagery "I have watched her dance beside me
as I ride through the trees"
I love this!

Lunchtime at Angeline's is like nowhere else... Listen to the 12 O'Clock Muse

And then Ange takes us to Lodz on a journey of validation that takes us back in time;
With these words
"There is no offering but this
to validate your existence."

they will exist forever, Ange. How beautifully heartbreaking this is- making a history lesson so
personal.

Go read, vote and comment!
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Old 09-26-2004, 08:04 PM   #165
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Sunday New Poem Reviews 9/26

Good evening one and all.....finally home and poems read, 15 I count.

There were several poets either posting for the first time, or who I am unfamiliar with.

The best of these efforts IMHO is kerra with embers.
This poem has nice pacing, reads well and presents some original images.
If I could do to you,
What spring does to cherry trees,
what sunlight does to orchid blooms,
I'd keep you in a hot house,
I look forward to seeing more from this poet. Give her a read, and some input.


I also liked http://www.literotica.com/stories/sh... Hearst</font>,another first post, this by
[color=crimson]LoreleiLong[COLOr].
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Old 09-26-2004, 08:33 PM   #166
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Sunday New Poems- oops!!!

You can see I've missed a week. I'm a bit rusty. Sorry....now back to business.....hopefully better.

One more note on On Hearst by LoreleiLong . I thought it could have been edited down, perhaps used a bit more metaphor, but I liked the pacing....and what she was trying to communicate. Keep trying Lorelei, it will come.

Odd day in that the erotic poetry outweighs the non-erotic. The two best are Everytime I look up and see you by Steve Porter and Drought, by our long lost prodigal son jthserra. Jim's is my favorite of the day- it's good to see him posting.
From Drought-
a dry protuberance
of chance – to fail
on an unmade bed
desire extinguished
in wrinkled folds of living

Read his poem, vote and say hello.

Steve's is a very lovely, wistful read as well. Don't miss it.

annaswirls has 2 short poems, another bullfrog, and the somewhat scary
centripetal force of inspiration
.

As usual anna's imagery is original, humorous and somewhat confounding....at least where I come from.

anna- I need some private tutoring!

the rest of you read, enjoy, vote and comment......that's it for me for today.



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Old 09-27-2004, 10:10 PM   #167
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monday new poems

sorry so late, it has been storming here all day and I do believe it has stopped for the time being. I 'm doing this in bits in case I lose the post...


New poems

First I want to say that reading the new poems of today ( and the past week) has truly humbled me. I am amazed at the talent I read here, from people who just want to share or "practice" or whatever reason, I have to saw we are all blessed to have this place as a resource, and I for one am very grateful for everyone here

~~~
As Boo said that she doesnt review, per se, she offers recommendations, I think I will do the same. I do not feel qualified to attempt to point out anything in any of these poems, except that they affected me, or touched me in some way that make them pleasurable, and worth reading.

so I begin with my disclaimer and ask anyone of you who was maybe hoping that I could offer some help, ( yes I flatter myself) You people are great already, thanks for letting me read your work

The Helga Pictures of Andrew Wyeth, by JD4George, is another example of a poet with a wonderfully profound way of painting word pictures. JD, youre really good, this poem touched me, that you seem to have reached into the works and plucked out beauty and put it into words, thank you for this, its lovely. My favorite part are these few lines at the end:

[I...]The orchard now green and flecked with leaves
communion seeped into the subconscious
as once again you look away
forty years of fury captured in
a peasant dress trimmed with black velvet[/i]
I like that you didnt use any punctuation, I am not a big comma fan, unless they are absolutely necessary and I realize that sometimes they are, I would like to ask your reasoning for this
~~~
Orchid Promised to the Sun, also by JD4George.I really like the way you have used the sun as the enchanted, and with a mere flower!!I almost get the feeling that you and the sun are vying for the lovely orchid and thus, I feel like a sort of voyeur reading this, you made me blush another beautiful offering!

Sun awaits the pink dawn,
face flushed, anticipation
holding back its breath
lest the breeze disturb this promise
of scented delight.

~~~

children of the lake
by tarablackwood22. I am so thrilled that tara has posted on my day, and a poem so filled with devotion it made my heart sing. I hope you dont mind that I printed this out and showed to my family
this part brought tears to my eyes, we shoudl all make memories for our children with or children so that have something to hold on to, i wish tara would be MY mom!!
take us to the water, mommy……

and I showed them my lake, showed them
its life, how it breathes and thinks
and whispers wonders in your ears,
telling and teaching, revealing things,

its perfect as far as I can tell

~~
Audio poems
there are three audio poems today, none of which had text with them, so once again, I feel as though I have cheated someone in an awful way and I hate that. I hope that you who can listen, will do so. There are 2 by beckman, Venus andvenus Rising ( slow and steady mix) and this author requests FB or I would have left it at that.
Also, one by SoundsErotica, sounds of Erotica with no special requests for FB, but listen and vote and offer some if you know this author would appreciate it I know most of us do, right?
~~
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Last edited by normal jean : 09-27-2004 at 11:32 PM.
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Old 09-28-2004, 09:03 AM   #168
annaswirls
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thirty something new poems


*I am going to do one section at a time and "edit" this post after each, so watch out, this is about to grow.*

I see some people hare already read and left some very thoughtful comments. I have read them- many quite good, many new names that reminded me of a certain 20-28 year old woman and how she wrote, felt, thought of course the new ladies here are much more poetic than I was! And I am not so sure how I write now is better, just different.

I am thankful that it was my day to take taras place or I might not have read these! Time is so short.
~


The first two new poets hit us with pounding images, raw poetry in the flesh. Nothing pre-packaged or over-processed. I am not feeling like I want to give suggestions on how to make these poems more traditionally accepted, I think that these writers can take their own paths. However, if she puts it out there that she wants some suggestions, I would be more than happy to share some. Please email or pm me as I don't always get to the boards.


Gothrockboheme
and
Purity Corrupted


Gothrockboheme list:

Androgyny
Dancing Naked
Diamonds
Underneath
High Again


From Underneath:

Quote:
Or do you want to be captured forever?
Photographed? Drawn?
Do you talk till dawn?
Whisper?
The other "new" to me poet is Purity Corrupted

She added two new poems to her growing list today:

A Moment
Fire and Light
*I Am Yours
My Blood
My Soul
*Transparent
Untitled


Another carnal honest writer. Check out her stuff and see what you think!


From
Transparent

Quote:
This girl curls at your feet.
Unnoticed.
She is transparent.
Permeable, thin and shallow.
She is transparent.

Okay next:
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"To be without some of the things you want is an indispensable part of happiness." Bertrand Russell

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Old 09-28-2004, 09:59 AM   #169
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catastrophe has an impressive list of stories you might want to check out if you like her poetry: Today's poem shows pain- emotional and physical.

crushing and erotic
by catastrophe ©

Quote:
my wrists are still bruised
from last night
from the wrestling
the tension
the sex that should have
happened
but didn't.


Senna Jawa © has two poems to share with us today, make sure to read both.

silver in the air
by Senna Jawa ©


Quote:
if they win it will be chablis
if they loose it's beer
His second offering watches poetry go down the drain. I love its simplicity and fitting metaphor. I know we are not the only ones who have felt this. Check it out.

1991-03-17/18 -- [came...]
by Senna Jawa ©




flyguy69 brings us another intelligent poem-- emotionally based without being sentimental or sappy-- thoughtful and new.



Coffee in Wartime

contrasts the coffee sipper safe in denial sitting in a coffee shop, planning her domesticated day with the raw reality of the war that rages outside of her world, but it isn't outside of her world. I am not sure what else to say, this is a great poem that restirred my own experiences of feeling frantic and helpless and looking cold. Just living.




Quote:
Blood-red roof tile erupts

like a flock of pigeons, banks
and flutters to the iron-stained street
around her; an RPG threat neutralized, delivered
to the God on call that day....


......
She blows

on the surface to cool the emotion, wipes
blood-red lip prints
from the plastic lid, then folds
the war in half.

Finally, three poems from three poets we can count on to share their best with us on a regular basis. There are great comments on these, and there will be more, I have to keep mine short. Finding Nemo book and CD are almost over and I must go take my son to the coffee shop.

Licentious Liturgy
by Tathagata ©


gotta love the sex and religion connection, and if you don't read it anyway, good read!


Quote:
I find no shame
in commiting capitulation
at your exaulted lower extremities,
prone and preoccupied
with your pleasure.
~
PatCarrington © has proven to be an impressive poet here at lit, and today's offering might just be my favorite. I have been on this bridge, clinking my wedding ring against it's metal railing. I never felt this experience being shared before. Hopefully it touches you as well. It would be hard to imagine how it wouldn't.

Brooklyn Bridge Goodbyes

Quote:
dark
slippings and spillings of the heart,
delaying our intercourse
with apology, postponing
my adultery with stories
she cannot tell, secrets poured
from cathedrals like confessions,
from newsstands where lovers
left her dry, looked and teased
and turned away.







Last but not least, we are taken cross country through dreams and life inbetween. I feel ill-equipt to comment on this poem. Please read it. I think jd4george © knows the answer at the end of this poem. I think I do.
Wonderful write. Thank you-

On the Back of a '57 Indian

Quote:
Somewhere, between making the promise
and chasing the dream, I tried being
a carpenter. A writer. A fool.
I folded my wallet too thinly
and counted lovers like my paychecks,
cashing kisses for ten dollar bills.
I stand in that place, now, wondering

how it was that I never started
on that cross-country sojourn,


I think I am done.

If I missed anything that you feel should be mentioned, please please do, this thread is for anyone to share their ideas about the new poems of the day.

Please join the regular volunteers in providing support and encouragement to the wonderful poets that live here, novice and experienced, smooth and rough, prepared into gourmet meals or raw and unprocessed. Everyone has a place here and a future of growth.

Best to you, thank you for letting me read your poetry, I feel fortunate, as always, to get a chance to comment.



anna
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"To be without some of the things you want is an indispensable part of happiness." Bertrand Russell

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Last edited by annaswirls : 09-28-2004 at 10:45 AM.
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Old 09-29-2004, 03:53 PM   #170
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Wednesday 9/29 New Poems

Good Wedesday, Poets

28 New Poems make up the list today—all of which I enjoyed very much and few stood out to me as I'm sure some will with you, fine poets.

I like to do reviews because it gives me more insight on human nature. In poetry I overlook small mistakes ( punctuation, superfluous words and some misspells), watch forms when they are there (although, I must admitt I know very little about forms), but mainly I look at the deeper meaning. The subject of the poem, the voice, imagery, and the delivery of the poem in total.

Today was a good example of what I like to see in poetry.



A fair number of illustrated poems are of good show, most note worthy are:
shadowlands by minsue ©, The Moment by lostandfounder ©, and Twice Blest by Angeline ©. Go check them out as they are definite visual treats for the day.


Kakariki Kinship by wildsweetone ©
This poet brings us a nature piece that is delivered with certain beauty.
Quote:
Ground ferns spawning
unfurling naïve
newborns, stretching
to dark green leaves.
Giverny Night and Day by Angeline ©
The tone in Ange's poem has a sensual, loving feel to it. It reads nicely. I especially like the simile of "It's safe as soup"
Quote:
It’s comfy there.
It's safe as soup when arms

open for legs to tango
tangled warmth, fingers kiss.
Laugh when words near miss.
Donna Marie by WickedEve ©
The form, terzanelle lends an airy, romanticized voice to this lavishly worded poem.
Quote:
Down there where the kudzu linger,
remember your Donna Marie,
wrapped around your deceitful finger,
past great lake, not over the sea.
Dissolve Into You by Savannah Skye ©
This poet submitted several poems today—one of which "I thought" to be one of the best reads of the day as it caught my eye and seduced me with it's pain, and honesty... just beautiful.
Quote:
Lying next to you
Lost inside your breath
Skin to skin
Vanities paper thin

Vulnerable without protection
I dissolve into you
Diffuse your pain
Dissipate your damage
Old Orchard Beach, 1962 by jd4george ©
Is a poem that sends some of us back on a nostalgic trip. And I say some of us with all due respect because after reading this poem, it shows me the rich sights, smells, and excitement I've missed being born too late in '77.

Fissures In A Texas Oil Field by hippiedude ©
Another of my favorite reads was this one. This is a powerful image with the mantis-like oil rig metaphor (and they look like praying mantis to me as well—especially that stretch along hwy 10.)
Quote:
But you want to talk about relationships,
forget the rise and fall of progress,
lament the many buried complexities
which rise to stain the surface
and fill the stalwart metal
of your resolve to leave,
left brain—
right brain—
no brain—
some nonsense about bipolar disease.
That's it folks, my opinion of good poetry.

Go out and spread your own


- neo


Last edited by neonurotic : 09-29-2004 at 04:54 PM.
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Old 09-30-2004, 07:08 PM   #171
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Thursday Sep 30

Been knee deep in work all evening, so I have to keep this brief today.

Only 11 new poems today. Here's my pick, Njoi.


The Fool by SelenaKittyn is my favourite of the day. A Tarot character play with a sultry richness to it.
Coyote howl and
quickchange chameleon,
he is all and nothing
in mercury motion.
He is jack of no trade
with so much potential,
an unsprung mousetrap
perched on the stairs.



Dead Poetry by PatCarrington describes him chasing the notion of his poetry, in poetry so fluent it looks easy.
Light
leads my shoes, hardens
the leathers of hollow search,
the beams of Betelgeuse
that burned their cloud-holes
to watch you move.



searching by BooMerengue is a wonderful, slightly magic read that had me silently nodding in recognition.
Can you tell me, please
where is the sandbox?
The one that wrapped around me
and shut out the fighting
and became the Cloud World
where girls and boys flew
and laughed and no one grew up?



Froot Loop Zen finds Tathagata reflecting over colors. The language and imagery is, to say the least, colorful.
These gasping colors,
bloodless,
struggle against the inevitable grave,
the fall to earth,
return.

dust mote flecks
of ragged beauty,
and in their endless sleep,
taken ,
by the winds
of transience.



Wanting Snow by Angeline gives us an ever shifting perspective on...snow. This four part poem is a cluster of individual styles and ideas on the theme. And each one very convincing.
White lines cross narrow surfaces,
delicate as pen-and-ink illustrations
that flow like a coda on the flight of birds,
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Old 10-02-2004, 05:11 AM   #172
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short mentions this morning, my friends...

Too long by Ancient117331 is a snapshot of a guy having a bad moment.


Don't Touch That Dial by denis hale is a great, funny read in true Cheech and Chong style. I remember having these type of disjointed conversations! Or should I say 'jointed'?


Lady's Blues In Winter by Angeline is another of the Diva's finger snapping walks through musical history. She makes me turn up the radio once again!

Have a nice day everyone, and remember... these are Mentions, not indictments! Go read, vote and comment on all the New Poems!

I just noticed... these are Saturday's. Where are Fridays?
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Old 10-03-2004, 07:01 PM   #173
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Sunday New Poem Reviews 10/3/2004

20 poems as I count 'em today.

Here goes.

Waiting for You by Goldie Munro is a nice effort- the repitition works well. If I could change one thing on this poem it would be the last word....I would have used "wanting". It would have added some emotion, I find wanting.

Is it just my paranoid imagination , or is annaswirls picking on me. She posts 3 poems today. again,firstabout not saying "I love you", but showing it.
The second i asked for v. has an incredible tempo which changes from from verse to verse, but each is off kilter....verse ii. seems to be the linchpin it all works from...at least for me....but you'll have to read it and decide for yourself.
The third and final from annaidiosyncratica is
why i don't write poetry anymore
.

All I can say about anna's poems with any certainty is I love how they read, find her always innovative and always want to read them again and again.

From
'i asked for v.
it I had a tab bar it would stomp us down down to the other side

return is all I can do

come save me you know how to make me shine
down the depths of blackpoint set somewhere half way to hell

silence of whispers is preferred

don't ask

don't ask me to stop pretending

___________________________

I'll be back....anna's worn me out.
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The world is too dangerous for anything but truth and too small for anything but love.....William Sloane Coffin
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Old 10-03-2004, 09:00 PM   #174
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More New Poem Reviews sunday 10/3/04

There is a verse in and the cows came by Maria2394 that stopped me stone cold:

I could have touched him one last time,
but somehow that touch would have been
akin to living stone, impossible.
Perhaps the cows knew my father
better that I ever did, and they whispered
their warm and sweet-breathed prayers
as he was lowered into the ground.

and the rest is damned good. Read it.

Tristesse shares The Ghosts of Storyville with us...a vivid, snappy look at an old time barbershop full of music and mood.
A little off the top:
They’re lurking
at Liberty and First.
where the hiss and slap of Buddy's strop
drifts out from the open door
of “N. Joseph’s Shaving Parlour.”
and the barber’s pole still squeaks.


Never Liked a Quicky by Celexxa is a humorous yet cautionary warning to all husbands who think a quick slap and tickle is satisfying enough for the wife.
It does lose its rhythm in a few places, but don't we all when we're in a hurry.


a liar's dessert
also by Maria2394

she bit, then swallowed
his words were still cold
when they came backup

you don't have to write a lot to say a lot.

I'm not commenting on
Naughty little boys....
by lushusboobs except to say I need to read it again....

That's it for me....sorry to post so late!

Remember to read, comment and vote...and if I missed one you liked....feel free to post on this here thread.

And thank you poets for all your hard work.....
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Old 10-04-2004, 11:17 PM   #175
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New Poems, Monday 10/04

sorry so late with the new poems. hubby was home all day and I just had not had a chance to get to them.
New Poems

the ones that caught my eye today,
first up, is Tathagata with Phantoms Tath uses his wonderful descriptive powers to wrestle with his ghosts, and shares the process and end result with us, for which I am grateful

~~

Michael on my Shoulders, by PatCarrington. I would joke about angels resting on shoulders and giving inspiration, but I will not do that , because I for one, believe that they do This poem has some wonderful imagery and well, I just thought it was a beautiful poem

~~~

In the Morning by spbgirl, deserves a mention, I think because she seems to have grasped the idea of "showing" but perhaps doesnt know just how to do that, instead she tells us, uses some interesting language. I believe if she worked on it a little, pared away a few extra words, she could uncover a lovely-(er) poem

~~~
Where Love Can be Found, by wildtiger. Its short, and simple, but I like the tone and the repetition of the beginning and end phrasing. This is another that would benefit from some further "tinkering"

~~~

'O' by doormouse. This is cute, made me smile. I dont know who Matriarch is, but I hope she appreciates this poem

~~

well Litsters, that's it from me, there were a few, "sexier" ones that some might enjoy, so as usual, read them if you have the time and inclination, till next week, vote, send FB and for goodness sakes,ya'll be nice to each other, I dont wanna have to open a spanking school for bad, I mean naughty, bad literotica poets

oh, and thanks to everyone who posted, I still cannot listen to the audio, and there were 2 offered today. They did, however, include text this time, enjoy!!

Last edited by Maria2394 : 10-04-2004 at 11:23 PM.
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