Old 01-25-2006, 07:19 AM   #1051
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Wednesday...

There are 24 new poems on this early mid-week morning for your enjoyment.

A brief review...

he might have said
by annaswirls

Awarded that elusive 'E', the pacing of this is vigorous and grabbing. Try reading it just once, and you'll find yourself sucked back in for more.

The Geography of Cobblestones
by TheRainMan

snippet...

The streetlights come on, and Iím
alone again. There must be
something here that satisfies

beyond my reckoning. I think
Iíll try a lullaby to lighten
their black blanket, so they know

the weight of my knees.


I enjoyed seeing the evolution of this, and very much enjoy what it's become. The differing images, from fruit women to jackhammers, hits home.

kneel and confess
by maria2394

Go and read this. Simply put.

Topless Under My Sweater
by SaraCrewe

An interesting premise that I had to mention. Some of the phrasing could use some tuning, but overall, clever and original.


Keep your eyes open for Tzara's take on Wednesday's new poems.

Have a great day, y'all.
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Old 01-25-2006, 11:24 AM   #1052
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Quote:
Originally Posted by duckiesmut
Wednesday...

Topless Under My Sweater
by SaraCrewe
....
I'll second this-- the handling of the metaphor in this poem is worth studying. Her touch is light but directive, and she never loses sight of the trope. So many poems here either force a metaphor into an ill-fitting box or develop a good one incompletely-- Sara avoids both of these pitfalls.

The poem is not perfect (in my myopic opinion), but in this one characteristic it is pretty damn close. Study it.

----

And if you want a poem that will stay with you all day/week/therestofyourlife, read
Quote:
Originally Posted by duckiesmut
he might have said
by annaswirls

Awarded that elusive 'E', the pacing of this is vigorous and grabbing. Try reading it just once, and you'll find yourself sucked back in for more.
I don't know how many reads this one has gotten, Anna, but half are mine.
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Old 01-25-2006, 07:07 PM   #1053
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SEARCHING FOR CARRIER

CARRIER FOUND... LOCKED

TRANSMISSION STARTING

(Mumbled sounds. Tapping noises.)

Is this thing on?

(Tap. Tap.)

Uh, hello.

Sorry I'm late. We had to rig up special transmission gear here.

(Clears throat. Noise of paper rustling.)

Um, there are twenty-four new poems today. Several good ones. Here's my report:
  • he might have said by annaswirls is an emotional poem about love and protection. The skittery style fits the subject matter well. Lit's Editor Gods have indicated their approbation by granting it a well deserved 'E'. This one deserves several reads, folks. Get cracking.
  • TheRainMan takes us on a nostalgic trip to Noo Yawk, albeit on hands and knees, in The Geography of Cobblestones. The poem features TRM's polished and intricate style and also teaches us about the city. I never knew Joe D had problems with heel spurs, for example. You learn something new ever day.
  • One of our excellent newer poets, Sara Crewe, has some coffee with a typically clueless guy in Topless Under My Sweater. Others have remarked on the fine use of metaphor in this poem. There are also some pretty good lines, like

    .....................................Itís odd

    that naked people make me think
    of clothes but they sound like outfits
    he tried on and then changed his mind

    when they felt too tight.


    Another must read in my judgment.
  • I quite like Knife Edge Moments by SelenaKittyn though I can't really tell you what it's about. Probably not a broken thermostat, though. Nice ending to this poem.
There are also several interesting short poems. Check out kneel and confess by Maria2394, Not a Real Blonde by LeBroz, and Winter by wildsweetone. What the hey. Check out all the new poems. It was a pretty good day for submissions and I'm sure there's probably more that you'll like (and will vote and comment on, right?).

Over and out.

(Click. Mild buzzing noise.)

END TRANSMISSION

CARRIER LOST
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Old 01-26-2006, 01:21 PM   #1054
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Thumbs down No Review by Me Today

Quote:
Originally Posted by flyguy69
"Miss Krabapatra? Clear my afternoon; I'm going to be reading the New Poems list top to bottom."

I'm not going to steal the reviewer's thunder, but there are so many excellent poems today that you might as well brew an extra pot, put on slippers, and cancel that haircut. It's that good.

:happy cat:
Please help yourself to the poems that please you! And may anyone else with a favorite today jump in with a recommendation.

There are 27 new poems today, and many of them are by writers whose work I know and respect. However today I can find nothing that interests me. I guess this flu/bug is worse than I thought. I can't even taste my tea. - I am going back to bed. The reviews are up for grabs today.

Pax
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Old 01-26-2006, 03:25 PM   #1055
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rybka
Please help yourself to the poems that please you! And may anyone else with a favorite today jump in with a recommendation.

There are 27 new poems today, and many of them are by writers whose work I know and respect. However today I can find nothing that interests me. I guess this flu/bug is worse than I thought. I can't even taste my tea. - I am going back to bed. The reviews are up for grabs today.

Pax
Ok, I'll fill in with the ones that stood out to me.

Desperation by neonflux. He had a whole set up today, and this is the best one. Some smart lines elevates it far above average without losing the down to earth feel of the language.

One Thread by Sara Crewe shares some metaphor themes with the one above. A strong poem for laundry day.

Grandma, Jesus and Buddha by Tristesse leaves a warm and lovely feeling behind. Go read, and smile.

crow bait by Maria2394 is a beautiful, sad little thing. Made me caw in sympathy.

A Conrad Dimple Poem I by WickedEve. I just have to go Google for Conrad Dimple now...

and finally...

i am 2-6-0 by recklesschild. A really cool sonnet.
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Old 01-26-2006, 04:22 PM   #1056
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Liar forgot to mention Kiss The Right Note, which will not only entertain you, but if you skip down to the comments you'll get handy advice on where to shop for whores.

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Old 01-26-2006, 04:29 PM   #1057
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Missed one:

Wind of the Shyest Wing by TheRainMan

It takes a certain kind of poet to make the opening stanzas fly instead of turning into clichť heaven, but TRM knows how.
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Old 01-27-2006, 09:28 AM   #1058
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Stones
by JCSTREET

You simply need to go read this poem.
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Old 01-27-2006, 12:13 PM   #1059
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New Poems review for January 27, 2006

Remember when you were 16 and for your birthday your family all gathered for dinner and there were presents from your little brother that he made in boyscouts that were supposed to be snowshoes but looked more like gates and there were socks from your grandma and a record from your sister that she always wanted to listen to and you smiled and thanked everyone politely even as you picked up the little box from Mom and Dad but when you opened it you couldn't believe what you were looking at because it was a set of car keys and even if it was for a used Pinto it was a car a car a car and it was yours?

That's what the New Poems list is like today.

Don't get me wrong, there are some very good poems all through the list. Neo, for instance, offers the illustrated Down, which manages to do much more than simply show a photo and write a poem about it.

And I quoteÖ (revererent pause) by Decayed Angel is a wonderful concatenation of thoughts and quotes, nicely illustrated.

I even read and enjoyed recklesschild's i am 2-6-0 before I realized I had slipped past the end of the list.

But in the middle of the today's list I found Stones by JCSTREET and shouted A Car! A Car! A Car!

JC was a prolific poet here a couple years back and was one of those poets whose work you printed out for study. Then, he hit his head on a rock or something and disappeared. The wounds have apparently healed because he returns today with a tour de force. Stones is a poem that defies convention and label. It is a poem that ignores any advice I or others have given about how to write poetry and brazenly wanders where it will. It stumbles. It breaks badly. It tramples rules. And it delights. Read this poem, and experience the thrill of a poem that discovers itself as it wanders through the labyrinth of love.
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Old 01-28-2006, 11:18 AM   #1060
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new poems review
for Saturday

the list is small today...

A Conrad Dimple poem II by Wicked Eve... I think the poem has dimples, check out Eve's continuing saga.


go read/vote and comment on todays poems.
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Old 01-29-2006, 12:12 AM   #1061
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A new poet by the name of Una Ryce has been a member since Jan. 26th. She has a couple new poems up that I really think are worth reading. It sounds as if she'd like some constructive criticism. She sent me a "thank you" email today saying how much she appreciated it. I didn't say much but what I did say was taken wonderfully. I do believe there's some need of improvement in her line breaks which I didn't get a chance to say yet. I'm going to let her know that I mentioned her as well as her poems after I'm done babbling here.

One of my favorites is She brushes my hair at midnight

Quote:
<snip>
How I want her
To brush out my demons
And untangle my dreams
Straighten my thoughts
And let me shine
Check her out. I'm sure she'd love to read some comments. Be nice.
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Old 01-29-2006, 12:03 PM   #1062
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Straight up, must reads:
pink gown by annaswirls


achilles by Senna Jawa


many others, but it's not my job
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Old 01-29-2006, 01:39 PM   #1063
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Quote:
Originally Posted by twelveoone
Straight up, must reads:
pink gown by annaswirls


achilles by Senna Jawa


many others, but it's not my job

I think it's everyone and anyone's job on Sunday. Isn't Sunday open review day?

I'm on the run, but I read all the poems today. Here are the ones that caught my eye (in varying degrees of quality), that I plan on rereading for the purpose of comment, if I have the time later. . . a pretty good day of poetry, I think.

In reverse order of appearance ( it's a good idea to read bottom up, so as not to miss anything, and also to give the poems that are at the river bottom as much chance to see some light as the ones near the surface. . . YDD taught me that. )


Lost Youth by bogusbrig

achilles by Senna Jawa

i lie awake by DeepAsleep

Sleepy Wonder by Saldne

Peer to Peer by lexitopoi

Deliberate Scars by Exitable Boy

Vintage by Sara Crewe

pink gown by annaswirls

The Stones of Carnac by f-cynyr

She Dreams in the Lavender Night by eagleyez

wet cement by dorksicle

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Old 01-30-2006, 10:24 AM   #1064
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Its a Patheticaly unmannerly Monday for some...

With such comments flaring, I am a butterfly of trepidation in a review world of
less than perfect...

So...
Not many poems today...
First
Surgery by bogusbrig
Not the kind of twisted world I would like to be tangled up in ...but, the words are well matched and makes for an interesting tale...
***
Writhing
by klingongal ©

This pen provides some touching erotic images ..joining ,trembling...its all good..
***

Return
by tungtied2u ©
Other than the line separation breaking my thoughts...I found the images of home quite refreshing...
***
Do You Believe?
by LuciousBi-Writes4U ©
Reminds me of the Tim Allen Santa Movies and the wee elf lass making hot coco and what she said..."believing is seeing not seeing is believing"..a sweet holiday pen..

Sorry ,invalidating another poets work is not my cup of tea...I would much rather motivate than denigrate....after all that's what Anonymouse voting is for

ďA man's own manner and character is what most becomes himĒ
Marcus Tullius Cicero quotes


p.s. as I see it mentioning a poem is reviewed or making a comment .should be voted 5..just not to break the writers actual voting count.....just a perk...for me...
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Old 01-30-2006, 03:22 PM   #1065
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One you neglect to mention, blue. A timely little piece by an oft' passed over poet.

Last edited by Tristesse : 01-30-2006 at 05:27 PM.
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Old 01-30-2006, 07:17 PM   #1066
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here is a poem I enjoyed today

it is by a new poet, ( I think). Some good imagery and it comes with an atmosphere that I enjoyed, overall, in my opinion, a pretty good piece!!

The Last Dozen Oysters on Duval by Decayed Angel.
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Old 01-31-2006, 09:39 AM   #1067
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It's Tuesday

* * * Good morning Poets. Last night I didn't see any poems post so I thought maybe my review day would be no more that a 'good morning Poet's' and a 'no poems today' But I wake to find thirty-one poems waiting for me. So before I'm late for work I'd like to say that overall the poems on the New Poem's page were good and am glad they were waiting for me.



I've been catching vampiredust's work and he has a fresh twist I like. His futuristic horror-like poem today is and interesting piece. Check it out: Life At The Centre Of The Universe

Much to learn from TheRainMan. Any aspiring poet should study his work. His poem Finding the Sound of Oak is an exceptional piece that I found to be the best of thirty-one poems I read today. Thank you
Quote:
I lost it long ago to the ax
of my neglect, like the pictures
of a man I passed from frame
to scrapbook to shoebox
and locked in a closet

like a skeleton. I return
to these woods with no tongue
and barefoot. To walk quietly,
listening for his risen bones.
Thanks for the hot Encounter, scarlet_kate! This erotic poem can be cleaned up, trimmed a little and still earn my

Maria2394 does a wonderful job in showing emotion in her poem snap. This poem has strong word choices and I really appreciate reading work like Maria's poem instead of weak, flowery overly thesaurus-sized words that leave me...well, limp.


Liar is a smart man when Sara chases him to the sofa instead of the other way around in, I chased Sara. Although I did find the parenthesis to be a bit distracting (maybe italics?), I liked this flash, topsy-turvy, jumbled thoughts that give the impression of playing chase.


Sara Crewe gives back her rib and bites her apple in her, I Have a Confession. I generally liked this poem, the idea of throwing back the proverbial Adam's rib, but stumbled a little on the poem's line breaks. Check it out for yourselves if you agree or disagree.


* Here are a couple of poems you might not want to miss on the New Poem's page : late blues by Senna Jawa, Breaking the Chain~~ ~~ by My Erotic Trail and Keep you safe by Una Ryce


* * * That's it folks. Get out there and support your own by commenting, voting, doing what you do. Have great Tuesday!

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Old 02-01-2006, 11:33 AM   #1068
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Wednesday's New Poems Reviews...

Even more brief than normal, as I am peeking at the new poems while mainlining a cup of medium roast amidst paperwork (on my desk, not in the coffee). Tzara will be along later, I'm certain, and will have more to say about these three, and perhaps a few others.

Sic Transit
by JCSTREET

Why I cannot love you
by Maria2394

Contraption
by bogusbrig
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Old 02-01-2006, 04:55 PM   #1069
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God, what a day. My internet connection has been down more than Google stock.

So let me snap to it.

There are sixteen new poems for your reading enjoyment today. You may want to sample these:
  • It seems that bogusbrig has been fiddling around in the basement, building some kind of Contraption, apparently with limited success.

    Guys. We never read the instruction manual.
  • Recently returned Lit poet JCSTREET tests our stamina with Sic Transit. I found the trip fascinatingly entertaining. But I must admit to a sharp pang of jealousy. I can't write this much in a month.
  • But my favorite of the day is Why I cannot love you by Maria2394, a rather steamy ode to a southern confection I'd never heard of before and a caboose with a will of steel.

    I'm hungry now. I wonder what's in the fridge?
Overall, a pretty good day for poetry, folks. There are several more poems to read today, so go check 'em all out and RVC.

Whew! Got all the way through before my internet connection dro...
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Old 02-02-2006, 06:38 PM   #1070
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New Poems of Thursday February 2, 2006

There are 15 new submissions on this February day, and as is my wont, I start off with a non-erotic "spinner" from the archives.
note: There is now a thread titled "Two Poems" that invites you to do your own "spinning" and then report back on what you have found. - Try it, you just might like it! There are more good 'OLD' poems out there than 'NEW' ones, even on the best of days!

Today's Golden Oldie:
This work was posted in May of 2002, and I found the poem by The Huntsman on spin number 11. This poet posted a dozen poems in 2002 and nothing since. This is the first piece by this poet that I have read. Since finding it I have looked at several other of his poems, and can only wish that he will see this and return to give us more.
Quote:
Know Me By Mine Iron Tread

Why now,
you recognise too slow,
the one danger you should know,
I am the madman in the stands,
and the marksman at the show;
I am the cripple in the cage,
and the roaring from within,
I am the desert full of rage,
I am storm bloated black
with sin-ful winds.

I was the dark god on the throne,
the woven bones below the door,
I was the weak one lying dead,
I was the leper on the floor -
in rags, enraged, in ruins posed,
the beaten bent on breaking more.

I will be waiting at the show,
warding the one thing you wonít know,
I have a dead hand in your lap,
Iíll be the faithful first to go;
and the huntsman at the wheel,
and the hateful one up here,
waiting with the scaling deeds,
the judgement drawing near.

I am a smiling mask of me,
painted wet on peeling clay,
I have the drive to disappear
and let the Others up to breathe.

Thereís only one thing that you know,
youíre all a part of Passionís show,
and I decide what you can hear,
and I decide what you can know,
and I decide what you can bear,
I ounce out pain-filled blow by blow.
You heard me,
Iím the only way,
you heard me,
Iím the only way,
you hear me,
Iím the only way,
heís let me be the only way.
***

There are new postings today from half a dozen familiar poets. They include:

Maria2394's Mexican Blanket.

Maria has received some excellent and constructive feedback on this mostly very strong poem. Go read this one and see how to create strong images and emotional longings with simple words and structure.

***

Scarlet's Web Part II. This is part two in a series by My Erotic Trail about a 'working girl'. I find this poem to be uneven. There are some pretty good lines, but they are interspersed with weaker ones. It is almost as if these poems are written in collaboration with a poet of different capability. I also must agree with a comment made yesterday about part one. I too find the inconsistency of the rhyme scheme confusing and distracting. Particularly when this could be a worthwhile poem without any rhymes at all.

***

One of my favorite Lit. writers, Liar, gifts us today with Serendip, which this poem clearly isn't. There is no chance nor luck involved in the choosing of phrasing and words like ". . . the consequences of
code sequences piled for moirť
truths . . . ". This Scandinavian author is always a pleasure, and often a challenge, to read!

***

Newcomer Una Ryce has two new poems up today Who you are and Ode to the Goddess. The latter one is the better of the two showing creativity in a novel viewpoint and a subtle twisting jab in the last line.

I find Who you are to be more letter than poem, or perhaps a first draft designed to sketch the theme with the intent to come back afterwards and fill in the colors and highlights with a palette of proper words and fresh phrases. - IMO this poem is one that could really benefit from some shelf-time and then a rewrite with an objective eye

***

standard fishy disclaimer:
Taste is always an individual thing so there certainly may be other poems out there today that you will thoroughly enjoy. If you find ones you really like on the New Poems page, please come back and tell us about them!

And please remember that our poets need your support, so Read Vote Comment Feedback. It wonít come back around if you donít send it out!

Regards, Rybka


To A Poet, Who Would Have Me Praise Certain Bad Poets. . .
You say, as I have often given tongue
In praise of what another's said or sung,
'Twere politic to do the like by these;
But was there ever dog that praised his fleas?
~ Yeats
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Old 02-03-2006, 12:18 PM   #1071
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Only one New Poem today. Not my cup of tea, but if you are a MET fan you may enjoy it.

Now get outside and enjoy this glorious day!
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Old 02-04-2006, 09:26 PM   #1072
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Quote:
Originally Posted by flyguy69
Only one New Poem today. Not my cup of tea, but if you are a MET fan you may enjoy it.

Now get outside and enjoy this glorious day!
Thank You Fly~

and today there is one poem posted as well <grin

read, comment, 'critique' and or feedback welcome.

Have a quality weekend
.....be sure to read and vote on the Sappho and Eros poem contest.
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Old 02-05-2006, 07:09 PM   #1073
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As a way of keeping my anxiety about the Super Bowl under some kind of control, I thought I'd read all the Sunday new poems and point out a few people might want to peruse. Y'all might want to sample these:
  • Iguana Friend by Decayed Angel is the latest in DA's series of Key West poems and pretty darn good in my opinion. Nice lizard picture is a bonus. DA has a couple other illustrated poems today as well.
  • SelenaKittyn has several illustrated poems today also. I found Valentine Honesty amusing. Should have been in the Valentine poetry contest, perhaps?
  • I think Sabina_Tolchovsky said she was going snowboarding today. Lovely day for it, actually. But in Metamorphosis she seems to have encountered a flash flood. Great last line.
  • JCSTREET perorates on old age (a topic I am getting ever more interested in) in My Ass Is Grass. I find it hard to sympathize with the "skinny ass" problem, though.
Hey. Still half an hour to kickoff. Plenty of time for you all to do some reading, voting, and commenting. Along with offering up those prayers for the God of Football to send us poor starvin' Seattleites an NFL championship.

Go 'Hawks!
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Old 02-05-2006, 07:21 PM   #1074
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In addition to Tzara's collection, I'd like to add Drink Ink, an illustrated piece by Decayed Angel. but the best thing about it is not how it looks, but how it sounds. Read it aloud.

Also, I'm Out by sandspike. Liberating thoughts with liberating eloquence. Or was that from yesterday's poems? <checks> No, that's today. Very well, go read.
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Old 02-06-2006, 02:49 PM   #1075
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Read meeting the Reaper by twelveoone. I dare ya.
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