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Old 08-05-2014, 09:01 AM   #1
handyandy666620
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dilemma of a teacher

my wife is a teacher and one of her students has a crush on her...any ideas how she can dissuade him from his advances?
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Old 08-05-2014, 10:02 AM   #2
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*shrug* Kick him in the nuts? That always dissuaded me...

She should tell him frankly and calmly that she has no interest in him, that she's happily married, that such behavior on his part is inappropriate and unacceptable, and that life will be easier for the both of them if he just lets it go.

Simple, calm, straightforward...done.

You don't say how old he is, but I'm guessing high school. She needs to be the grown-up here and take charge of the situation by confronting it and making it clear where they both stand. And make it stick.
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Old 08-05-2014, 10:13 AM   #3
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Old 08-05-2014, 10:15 AM   #4
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I second BurningMonkey's advice on this but would add that she should probably bring this to her administrator's attention as well just to cover her own arse in the matter. Even has not behaved inappropriately herself or done anything to encourage this student's infatuation, there's always the danger of the student attempting to retaliate by claiming she came onto him if his advances are spurned.
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Old 08-05-2014, 10:56 AM   #5
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Definitely talk to HR first, before confronting the lad. She needs to make certain that there is not even a whiff of inappropriate or surreptitious behavior.

And you might want to ask the mods to move this thread to How To or some other forum. Unless you are trying to turn this into a story.
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Old 08-05-2014, 12:02 PM   #6
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Originally Posted by Carnevil9 View Post
Definitely talk to HR first, before confronting the lad. She needs to make certain that there is not even a whiff of inappropriate or surreptitious behavior.

And you might want to ask the mods to move this thread to How To or some other forum. Unless you are trying to turn this into a story.
This.

Any advances, whether innocent or not, must be handled by HR to protect her. It is much too easy to turn the table against her.
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Old 08-05-2014, 12:03 PM   #7
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Certainly have her discuss it with the administration to make them aware of the issue. They might also have ideas for how to handle it or depending on the student, may have other teachers that have experienced the same thing with the same student.

The best thing that she can do is to not tolerate any of his advances. I know a few male teachers and they have ways of making sure that nothing can ever be said about them and those things should be work for your wife as well. Make sure that she is never alone with the student. And if for some reason she must be, leave the classroom door open and make sure she stands in view of the door at all times.

Should he make comments, let him know that they are NOT acceptable and do not be afraid to write him up for anything against the code of conduct.

My best friend is a teacher and he get's all kinds of flirtatious banter from 8th grade girls and basically just doesn't acknowledge it. It's likely a little different because they are 8th grade girls who mostly just get giggly but ignoring it and not giving the student the attention that they are wanting might work for an older male student as well.
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Old 08-05-2014, 02:31 PM   #8
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I'm not sure where you are but here the school year has really just gotten started.
She should go and talk to the admin about the situation and see if the kid can be moved to another class.
Removing him from the situation will likely cool whatever infatuation he's got going (out of sight out of mind) and avoid ever having some unpleasant confrontation. I can't see that ending well especially if the kid is going to have to spend the rest of the year sitting in her class.
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Old 08-05-2014, 05:00 PM   #9
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I had to address this during the last school year. Something that seemed harmless escalated until I was uncomfortable and rightfully concerned. I did begin by speaking with my principal, which I highly suggest your wife do, as well.

With the guidance of my principal, I did speak with the student. We spoke in a large and public area, with my principal within sight but not involved; our goal was to protect all involved. To sum up my statements to the young boy, I told him that I found him a great participant in class, his writing voice and contributions were among the best. But, I was worried that he felt too comfortable with me and emphatically stated that our relationship was strictly student and teacher. I did not accuse him of "liking" me or flirting with me.
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Old 08-05-2014, 05:08 PM   #10
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Definitely talk to HR first, before confronting the lad. She needs to make certain that there is not even a whiff of inappropriate or surreptitious behavior.
This. A lot of schools will have some sort of rules on how to handle situations like these, and you want to be sure you're following the rules.
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Old 08-05-2014, 05:52 PM   #11
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I had to address this during the last school year. Something that seemed harmless escalated until I was uncomfortable and rightfully concerned. I did begin by speaking with my principal, which I highly suggest your wife do, as well.

With the guidance of my principal, I did speak with the student. We spoke in a large and public area, with my principal within sight but not involved; our goal was to protect all involved. To sum up my statements to the young boy, I told him that I found him a great participant in class, his writing voice and contributions were among the best. But, I was worried that he felt too comfortable with me and emphatically stated that our relationship was strictly student and teacher. I did not accuse him of "liking" me or flirting with me.
How did the boy react? Did it put an end to the issue? It seems that sometimes that is almost the start of the trouble. I don't teach but i did do some coaching of highschool kids. There were a few minor issues that arose but nothing serious thankfully. But I was aware of other instances with other teachers that were problematic. And in our area there were a few major news "student/teacher" relationship stories that hit the national news.
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Old 08-05-2014, 07:50 PM   #12
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my wife is a teacher and one of her students has a crush on her...any ideas how she can dissuade him from his advances?
That is a zillion kinds of disaster just waiting to unfold. If she values her career and even her freedom I would suggest she take action. She needs to bring this to the attention of someone before the student does. Whispers have killed lots of careers and even her just trying to be nice can be interpreted differently by him. Teen boys are a hormonal mess and she of all people has to be aware of this and the mine field it presents in her profession.
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Old 08-05-2014, 09:31 PM   #13
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How did the boy react? Did it put an end to the issue? It seems that sometimes that is almost the start of the trouble. I don't teach but i did do some coaching of highschool kids. There were a few minor issues that arose but nothing serious thankfully. But I was aware of other instances with other teachers that were problematic. And in our area there were a few major news "student/teacher" relationship stories that hit the national news.
He did handle it well and stopped being flirtatious. For this particular kid, this was the right way to handle it. Different kid, different action could be needed. Regardless, the first step has to be to seek help from an administrator.

Side note: he did send me a FB friend request almost immediately upon "graduating" 8th grade and leaving our school. I declined, of course.
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Old 08-05-2014, 10:42 PM   #14
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If your wife can't work this out on her own she has no right to be a teacher!

So why did you really ask this question?
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Old 08-05-2014, 11:14 PM   #15
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If your wife can't work this out on her own she has no right to be a teacher!

So why did you really ask this question?
You got that vibe, too?
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Old 08-06-2014, 12:26 AM   #16
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You got that vibe, too?
If I am not sure I will check the post history first - this time I was sure. I have only now just looked at his post history - he has even written a little story about it - one of those poorly written masturbation fodder things.
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Old 08-06-2014, 05:51 AM   #17
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Quote:
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If your wife can't work this out on her own she has no right to be a teacher!

So why did you really ask this question?
Yes to this, actually.

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Originally Posted by NightL View Post
If I am not sure I will check the post history first - this time I was sure. I have only now just looked at his post history - he has even written a little story about it - one of those poorly written masturbation fodder things.
Ugh... I really need to check post history before commenting. My replies were genuine, but I'm thinking the OP was hoping for something more like, "She should fuck him!" (Well, with more detail of course.)
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Old 08-06-2014, 10:09 AM   #18
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If your wife can't work this out on her own she has no right to be a teacher!

So why did you really ask this question?
It was in Story Ideas originally. Past posts of his have been requests for stories of his wife. Perhaps "the wife" really didn't need advice?
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Old 08-06-2014, 10:23 AM   #19
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I just dug deeper, and his original story (that he posted in Author's Hangout) had the boy at age 13. Hopefully he edited that out before submitting it to Lit.
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Old 08-06-2014, 10:38 AM   #20
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Yes to this, actually.



Ugh... I really need to check post history before commenting. My replies were genuine, but I'm thinking the OP was hoping for something more like, "She should fuck him!" (Well, with more detail of course.)
I fall for this almost every time. People wonder why we're so unwelcoming of idiocy.
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Old 08-06-2014, 04:01 PM   #21
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my wife is a teacher and one of her students has a crush on her...any ideas how she can dissuade him from his advances?
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Originally Posted by handyandy666620 View Post
i love this website but my only regret is that im no good at writing stories.is there anyone out there who can write some erotic stories for me.
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Please help me i have some great ideas about stories but have no idea about how to write them and would love for you to create some stories for me.
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this is my first post on this website...me and the wife have been avid fans of this website for years...is their any story writers out there who could write a personnal story for me and my wife...intimate details can be provided as well as plots..
look forward to feedback
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any authors out there want to write a story for me?
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looking for a lady who will be a mother to me and do all those motherly things for her son. xx

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Old 08-06-2014, 04:41 PM   #22
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JtohisPB has it right... she has to bring it to the attention of her principal, just to protect herself.. and then be firm in letting the student know that this is not going to happen.. and there is no chance of it happening. Mary Kay Latourneau was preyed upon by her student.. she was at a weakened state emotionally and the kid used it to fit his desire to be with her. Even now that she is married to him, her life was destroyed by a child who was the sexual aggressor.. but the Law doesn't allow any exceptions.. the adult is always at fault and will be punished under the law..
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Old 08-06-2014, 06:49 PM   #23
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Gees literotica peeps...only posted to get a debate going..didnt expect people to go crawling the depths of previous posts...I welcomed the input by many..but some of you need to lighten up and not take things to seriously!!! Rant over .
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Old 08-06-2014, 07:06 PM   #24
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I welcomed the input by many..but some of you need to lighten up and not take things to seriously!!! Rant over .
So, you're saying you lied about "your wife's dilemma"? She doesn't "need help dissuading a student"?
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Old 08-06-2014, 07:20 PM   #25
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So, you're saying you lied about "your wife's dilemma"? She doesn't "need help dissuading a student"?
Great, here I was getting my posse together to go and kick his little ass and now I find out that the whole thing is wank fodder? dammit

I was really looking forward to the rump thumping.
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