Originally Posted by lovecraft68
I won't look at non con, but the sentence Bramblethorn posted had two issues
Almost is a weak and often inaccurate word. How do you almost whisper? You whispered or you did not. Most often that word should be dropped.
Perfume threw me as well as I associate it with the feminine. Not sure how it would unnerve her either, unless it was the musky scent of his sweat, I don't know, just doesn't seem to fit.
That's a good point. It should be cologne.
You know, when you're talking to someone, and suddenly you realize they're too close- you get a sudden whiff of their perfume- and in the story, the character is already wary of the person, so the whole situation feels 'unnerving' to her.
Almost whispered? Hmm.. Sorry, I can't explain myself- it just went well with the flow.
It was supposed to be at a normal volume- she asked the question at a normal volume- you'd expect the answer back normally, but something in the way he said it made it seem like it was a secret, so it came out as a whisper?
I'm sorry 😂