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Old 09-25-2017, 11:27 PM   #1
curiousaboutkink is offline
Join Date: Sep 2017
Posts: 1
Need help bridging the gap between my partner and me


I am relatively new to BDSM. My boyfriend has had a lot more experience and has introduced me to his kinks, some of which I had interest in before and some which are new to me. I am usually open to trying things and we communicate often about our sex life, but we are obviously coming from different viewpoints and it can be a challenge. I feel like the pacing of things is going a bit fast for me, and probably too slow for him. I feel a bit overwhelmed at times which makes it harder for things to progress, but I'm sure he's frustrated as we have been talking about this for a while and still have a lot to explore. For reference, he is into humiliation and me being dominant. Does anyone have experience with bridging the gap between an experienced and an inexperienced partner? I want us both to be happy and fulfilled. TIA.

Old 09-26-2017, 09:33 AM   #2
MeekMe is offline
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 4,431
Since you're worried about this and feeling overwhelmed you should talk to him about it. It's great that you're exploring and here asking questions, how awesome to find a partner with similar interests. Don't be afraid of repetition. It probably feels like you need to always introduce something new, but in my experience that makes every time somewhat awkward. Repeating things may seem "boring" but I found that it really isn't (and there's nothing wrong with adding some variation here and there). Taking time to get comfortable with one thing before moving on to the next is good practice and means that you'll have a chance to grow more comfortable and confident instead of rushing through to the next thing which tends to feel overwhelming.

Tell him you need him to be patient while you get comfortable. He's probably pretty excited you're even giving it a try.
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