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Old 11-18-2017, 09:38 PM   #1
sissy_traci
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New writer needs editor

I'm a new writer and I'm looking for someone to edit my work. It's transsexual/crossdressing. It has been sent back to me and I need help with my dialogue between my characters as well as other editing suggestions.
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Old 11-18-2017, 10:29 PM   #2
HeyAll
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Can you post a sample of your dialogue?
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Old 11-18-2017, 10:48 PM   #3
sissy_traci
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Dialogue

As summer started to approach I realized I had to find a summer job. One afternoon while I was surfing the want ads my phone lit up it was a text from Texi saying “Hey”.

I ignored it and went back to looking through the ads my phone buzzed again.

It was her again this text said, “stop ignoring me and answer.”

I picked it up and said, “what do want.”

Her response shocked me, “I just wanted to ask if I could come by and talk to you about what happened over Christmas break as I deserved a true apology and explanation.”

“That’s probably not a good idea as I really don’t want old feelings coming up,” I replied.
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Old 11-19-2017, 12:00 AM   #4
HeyAll
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Try this:


As summer started to approach I realized I had to find a summer job. One afternoon while I was surfing the want ads, my phone lit up it, and it was a text from Texi with the message: 'hey'

I ignored it and went back to looking through the ads my phone buzzed again.

It was her again with another text: 'stop ignoring me and answer.'

I picked up the phone and finally mustered the courage to call her.

“What do you want?" I asked, frustrated

Her response simply came as a shock to me.

“I just wanted to ask if I could come by and talk to you," she said softly. "What happened over Christmas break was wrong and you deserve a true apology and explanation."

“That’s probably not a good idea as I really don’t want old feelings coming up."

Last edited by HeyAll : 11-19-2017 at 12:03 AM.
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Old 11-19-2017, 12:01 AM   #5
HeyAll
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You put things in italics by putting the words in this bracket form: <i> </i>

Put the words inside that, then when you preview it before submitting, you'll see that the words become italics. Use 'b' instead of 'i' then it becomes bold.
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Old 11-19-2017, 01:50 AM   #6
oldnakeddad
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This is what I'd do

As summer started to approach, I realized I had to find a summer job. One afternoon, while I was surfing the want ads, my phone lit up...it was a text from Texi saying, 'Hey'. I ignored it and continued looking through the ads until she texted, again, 'Stop ignoring me and answer.'

I picked it up and texted, 'What do you want?'

Her response shocked me! 'I only want to ask if I can come by and talk to you about what happened during Christmas break, as I deserve a true apology and explanation!'

'That’s probably not a good idea, as I really don’t want old feelings coming up,' I replied.
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