I was just today talking to my SO about the story I'm currently writing, and I find that I need a female perspective on just how a large penis "feels" as opposed to a smaller one during intercourse. It's things like this that I fear can really come off as stupid in my writing. I mention this just as an example of the hazards of trying to "be" the other gender. But, these things are just something to be aware of and realize I don't really know... and try to find out. I personally feel it is easier to crossover in regard to the mental/emotional areas of the story...but I may just be deluding myself on that too
PS: Just a comment on the conversation about female appreciation of gay male erotica; Again, my SO has always enjoyed and been aroused by gay porn...I wouldn't attempt to say exactly why though...maybe I should ask, because now I'm curious.