Go Back   Literotica Discussion Board > Main Literotica Forums > BDSM Talk

Reply
 
Thread Tools

Old 09-25-2008, 05:38 PM   #1
Younginlondon
Experienced
 
Younginlondon is offline
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: London. UK
Posts: 79
Orgasm Denial

Although I have never experienced it on me or had the opportunity to deny anyone else (in person, the idea sounds amazing to me.

Does anyone else like this kink or is it just me? Also is it just a male thing or do women also like it?
  Reply With Quote

Old 09-25-2008, 05:54 PM   #2
Yang4yin
Bored by the Critics
 
Yang4yin's Avatar
 
Yang4yin is offline
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Fantasy Land
Posts: 20,002
Quote:
Originally Posted by Younginlondon View Post
Although I have never experienced it on me or had the opportunity to deny anyone else (in person, the idea sounds amazing to me.

Does anyone else like this kink or is it just me? Also is it just a male thing or do women also like it?
Believe me, you are not alone!


.
__________________
.
.

  Reply With Quote

Old 09-25-2008, 08:14 PM   #3
EmpressFi
Mama Bear
 
EmpressFi's Avatar
 
EmpressFi is offline
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: OH
Posts: 4,622
eh.. its ok.. but deny it too long and I no longer have a sex drive .. just how I'm wired.
__________________

It's not kinky unless you have a feather duster in your ass
  Reply With Quote

Old 09-26-2008, 12:39 AM   #4
Zoots_owner
Really Experienced
 
Zoots_owner is offline
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 182
I've used it many times, but mostly fairly briefly, as preparation for something that was to come after. *evil grin*
  Reply With Quote

Old 09-26-2008, 03:54 AM   #5
Lizzie_Borden
Real & Spectacular
 
Lizzie_Borden's Avatar
 
Lizzie_Borden is offline
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Australia
Posts: 4,168
Ugh

Total love/hate relationship with that.

I know it makes me cum bigger and harder when I'm forced to wait, the actual being made to wait cos someone else is in control of that is really hot, and I do kinda enjoy the squirmy horny feeling.

But god I hate waiting :P I love my orgasms.
  Reply With Quote

Old 09-26-2008, 04:49 AM   #6
Lady_Midnight
Literotica Guru
 
Lady_Midnight's Avatar
 
Lady_Midnight is offline
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 678
I do enjoy denying someone else their orgasms
  Reply With Quote

Old 09-26-2008, 05:21 AM   #7
castagnus
Literotica Guru
 
castagnus is offline
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: 26.6 N- 81.8 W
Posts: 515
Quote:
Originally Posted by Younginlondon View Post
Although I have never experienced it on me or had the opportunity to deny anyone else (in person, the idea sounds amazing to me.

Does anyone else like this kink or is it just me? Also is it just a male thing or do women also like it?
It sounds so hot - but in reality, I've only pulled it off a few times when it was soooo exciting - but more often, it has caused emotional upsets - very unerotic.
__________________
There is no nonsense so arrant that it cannot be made the creed of the vast majority by adequate government action Bertrand Russell
  Reply With Quote

Old 09-26-2008, 08:26 AM   #8
ecstaticsub
Literotica Guru
 
ecstaticsub's Avatar
 
ecstaticsub is offline
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 3,383
I don't get into orgasm denial. (neither does my PYL thankfully) What we both do enjoy is the simple art of teasing. It is one of the things that got me interested in him to begin with. He wasn't easy. LOL I met him on-line and on the site we were on I was used to being able to pick out any man I wanted and tease and cyber with him anyway I wanted. My PYL when I first met him wasn't so easy. I like a challenge and I like being made to wait sometimes. Not for orgasms so much as attention. Once we are into the middle of play we are both multiorgasmic so why deny something that is so good for both of us.
__________________
I'm looking for kinky girlfriends-My Lit Personal Ad

"Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them you are a mile away from them, and you have their shoes."~~~Frieda Norris The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants
  Reply With Quote

Old 09-26-2008, 01:16 PM   #9
subwannabe
Literotica Guru
 
subwannabe is offline
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Southeast USA
Posts: 2,872
I find it extremely hot as long as it's not done to the ridiculous. I love orgasm denial for periods of days or for a week or two as long as I can get hard several times in between. I wouldn't want to do it for months at a time. I like to be the slave and I am much more attentive and follow orders better while in this condition. I love somone else being in total control of me and my orgasms, making me do whatever they want and if I don't obey them to the letter my orgasm is put off longer and longer. If I want an orgasm I have to earn it by being a good slave. My orgasm is not automatic and it only comes when she decides I have obeyed her to her complete satisfaction for whatever time frame she chooses (only known to her). My slavery would include things both in and out of the bedroom.

Last edited by subwannabe : 09-26-2008 at 01:19 PM.
  Reply With Quote

Old 09-26-2008, 01:24 PM   #10
Fauna
Experienced
 
Fauna is offline
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: Northern California
Posts: 79
I love controlling my slaves orgasm, but not for more than a day or two. I do it just to tease him, to remind him who own him. I love hearing him beg me let him cum.

Sometimes I let him work up to the point that he's going to cum and them distract him to break his concentration. I'll do that a few times and he has an amazing orgasm. Or, I'll tell him I'm not interested and we can try again tomorrow...
__________________
Miz Kit

  Reply With Quote

Old 09-26-2008, 01:42 PM   #11
Toa_lin
Literotica Guru
 
Toa_lin's Avatar
 
Toa_lin is offline
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 875
that control, if used at the just the right length of time, will send them wild, and gives me (top) the enjoyment of absolute control.
__________________
Toa-Lin The Shadow Patron...
  Reply With Quote

Old 09-26-2008, 02:12 PM   #12
Nipples4U
Virgin
 
Nipples4U is offline
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 22
I have trouble getting my intimate partners to accept that orgasm is not what I seek. In fact, it is imperative to my health that orgasm be denied me. It is not difficult since I cannot achieve it with general methods of intercourse alone. The act of sexual intercourse in and of itself, any way the man wants it, pleasures me so much more deeply than an orgasm ever could.

The dismay comes from those who want a full explanation of this. Why can't men just accept it without conversation?
  Reply With Quote

Old 09-26-2008, 02:14 PM   #13
Kajira Callista
Empty
 
Kajira Callista's Avatar
 
Kajira Callista is offline
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: In the shadows
Posts: 19,347
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nipples4U View Post
I have trouble getting my intimate partners to accept that orgasm is not what I seek. In fact, it is imperative to my health that orgasm be denied me. It is not difficult since I cannot achieve it with general methods of intercourse alone. The act of sexual intercourse in and of itself, any way the man wants it, pleasures me so much more deeply than an orgasm ever could.

The dismay comes from those who want a full explanation of this. Why can't men just accept it without conversation?
because it sounds like BS until it is explained?
__________________
My stuff
“Too long a sacrifice
Can make a stone of the heart."
William Butler Yeats


Take the love that comes to you today, embrace it for all it is worth, and return it threefold, tenfold, a hundredfold. Take the joy that comes to you today, embrace it for all it is worth, and return it. Take even the sorrows that come, for not all of life can be wondrously fine and happy and laughing, and embrace them for what they're worth...
And give tomorrow unto tomorrow, for we never know if it will come at all.
Sir Winston


I don't like copycats.
  Reply With Quote

Old 09-26-2008, 02:32 PM   #14
MaleSlut47
Literotica Guru
 
MaleSlut47 is offline
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: NJ on the Barnegat Bay
Posts: 597
I love having this done to me within reason. Being made to beg to cum for a woamn is very hot for me...
  Reply With Quote

Old 09-26-2008, 02:35 PM   #15
Nipples4U
Virgin
 
Nipples4U is offline
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 22
deleted for better input below.

Last edited by Nipples4U : 09-26-2008 at 03:02 PM.
  Reply With Quote

Old 09-26-2008, 02:45 PM   #16
FurryFury
Addict of Sensation
 
FurryFury's Avatar
 
FurryFury is offline
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: The Deep South
Posts: 29,284
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nipples4U View Post
I have trouble getting my intimate partners to accept that orgasm is not what I seek. In fact, it is imperative to my health that orgasm be denied me. It is not difficult since I cannot achieve it with general methods of intercourse alone. The act of sexual intercourse in and of itself, any way the man wants it, pleasures me so much more deeply than an orgasm ever could.

The dismay comes from those who want a full explanation of this. Why can't men just accept it without conversation?
I think it's because our society tends to think men who come without making sure their partner does too, are stupid selfish bastards. It also teaches men that women don't mean what they say or speak that special double talk language. KWIM?

Thankfully, when I couldn't come, my husband was able to get past it. That in turn allowed me to get past it as well. For me it was an emotional block more than a physical one.

__________________
FurryFury

"I ask nothing but what you would freely give me. I honor you as you are, not as something to change." ~ Me

Helping people is one of my drugs but the overdose can be a real bitch. ~ Me

Warning: Steroids make me snappish. ~ Me

The stories I have here at Lit: Vote if you like the stories!
http://english.literotica.com/storie...ge=submissions

Fury's Filthy Stories: http://www.literotica.com:81/forum/s...d.php?t=400253
  Reply With Quote

Old 09-26-2008, 03:01 PM   #17
Nipples4U
Virgin
 
Nipples4U is offline
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 22
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kajira Callista View Post
because it sounds like BS until it is explained?
Coital cephalalgia. Look it up.
  Reply With Quote

Old 09-26-2008, 04:13 PM   #18
ecstaticsub
Literotica Guru
 
ecstaticsub's Avatar
 
ecstaticsub is offline
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 3,383
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nipples4U View Post
Coital cephalalgia. Look it up.
I get those, too. I take Inderal for it everyday and it helps. I have an appt with a neurologist to have the med changed to something else due to side effects and a mildly significant drug-drug interaction with something I am already on.

Without the medication the pain is so bad I feel like my head is going to explode.
__________________
I'm looking for kinky girlfriends-My Lit Personal Ad

"Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them you are a mile away from them, and you have their shoes."~~~Frieda Norris The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants
  Reply With Quote

Old 09-26-2008, 04:42 PM   #19
bwallard
Really Experienced
 
bwallard's Avatar
 
bwallard is offline
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 162
The master or mistress is mistress or master because he or she is, actually, a mistress or master.

A sub, in a properly functioning relationship, is learning the skills of mistressy or mastery.

This is how this stuff should work. Simply indulging complementary kinks is pretty much like hanging out because you like the same television shows.

And! An essential component of mastery or mistressy is the ability to sustain heightened arousal while performing tasks such as calculus, coding in C, or writing a family-friendly short story about fishing with your Dad.

Subs begging for orgasm, as appealing an outcome that might be to naive, power-deprived Ds, is simply not acceptable. It doesn't matter how horny you are, you must remain fully functional, or at least maintain decorum.
  Reply With Quote

Old 09-26-2008, 05:14 PM   #20
Zoots_owner
Really Experienced
 
Zoots_owner is offline
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 182
Quote:
Originally Posted by bwallard View Post
A sub, in a properly functioning relationship, is learning the skills of mistressy or mastery.

This is how this stuff should work.
Well, that is one of the older POVs, taken from the 1950 gay bikers that pretty much all organized BDSM (in North America, anyway) can trace its origins to. But it's not universal. Another perspective is that some people are naturally dominant, others submissive, and that there's no point in trying to make people into something that's against their nature. Yet others, like Goreans and some Femdoms, mostly feel that D/s has a natural basis in gender, so might not approve of someone switching roles short of a sex change. There isn't just one way of looking at D/s.

But this is going way off topic, isn't it?
  Reply With Quote

Old 09-26-2008, 06:57 PM   #21
Fauna
Experienced
 
Fauna is offline
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: Northern California
Posts: 79
Quote:
Originally Posted by bwallard View Post
The master or mistress is mistress or master because he or she is, actually, a mistress or master.

A sub, in a properly functioning relationship, is learning the skills of mistressy or mastery.

This is how this stuff should work. Simply indulging complementary kinks is pretty much like hanging out because you like the same television shows.
bwallard, I'm not sure where your ideas are coming from or why. "This is how stuff should work" is like doing the same thing we've always done, because that's the way we've always done it. New ideas or ways of doing things don't come from that mentality.

Not everyone wants to be a Domme or a Top and not everyone wants to be a sub or a bottom. I know people who want to start from the "bottom" and work their way up, but who says being a bottom is the place to start?

I'm into orgasm denial as a way to show dominance, as I understand other people use this technique. There are websites devoted to it. Its a kink into itself, not a complimentary kink.

There is no one right or wrong way to have a BDSM relationship even though there are groups of people who think they know the one true way.

I wish you the best on your path.
__________________
Miz Kit

  Reply With Quote

Old 09-26-2008, 08:32 PM   #22
Younginlondon
Experienced
 
Younginlondon is offline
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: London. UK
Posts: 79
ummmmmmmmm

Quote:
Originally Posted by FurryFury View Post
I think it's because our society tends to think men who come without making sure their partner does too, are stupid selfish bastards. It also teaches men that women don't mean what they say or speak that special double talk language. KWIM?

Thankfully, when I couldn't come, my husband was able to get past it. That in turn allowed me to get past it as well. For me it was an emotional block more than a physical one.

Sorry, i do not understand how we hot here, this thrread was not not about society or men making women cum. Its a thread to see if people like the KINK: ORGASAM DENIAL. I do I know people who do... but siomply want to hear views of others. Lets not use threads to let off about any ol thing.
  Reply With Quote

Old 09-26-2008, 08:37 PM   #23
Nipples4U
Virgin
 
Nipples4U is offline
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 22
Quote:
Originally Posted by ecstaticsub View Post
I get those, too.

Without the medication the pain is so bad I feel like my head is going to explode.
I appreciate that another poster here is aware and has personal experience with it. In my case, medication is out of the question. Therefore, orgasm is completely out of the question. Fortunately, no man can engage in intercourse with me and just intercourse and bring it about. That is also why oral cannot be performed on me.

It's so frustrating that men want to know all the details of a condition I have rather than accept that I don't want them to work on bringing me to orgasm.
  Reply With Quote

Old 09-26-2008, 10:07 PM   #24
mslv4Her
Literotica Guru
 
mslv4Her is offline
Join Date: Oct 2004
Posts: 2,317
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lady_Midnight View Post
I do enjoy denying someone else their orgasms
Someone like me, maybe?!?
__________________
Oral Service Provider #19 -- Visit the Official Registry
http://www.literotica.com:81/forum/s...7&page=1&pp=25
  Reply With Quote

Old 09-27-2008, 12:52 AM   #25
FurryFury
Addict of Sensation
 
FurryFury's Avatar
 
FurryFury is offline
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: The Deep South
Posts: 29,284
Quote:
Originally Posted by Younginlondon View Post
Sorry, i do not understand how we hot here, this thrread was not not about society or men making women cum. Its a thread to see if people like the KINK: ORGASAM DENIAL. I do I know people who do... but siomply want to hear views of others. Lets not use threads to let off about any ol thing.
When you start a thread people don't necessarily fall in line and only talk about what you had in mind. There are almost always side trips. If you can't handle that it's going to be a bumpy ride for you here.

On topic which I also thought my last comment was, btw, I hate orgasm denial. I wouldn't want to make someone NOT come and I wouldn't want them to make me not come. It just isn't my thing to deny myself or my lover.

However, I do like the idea of coming on command. It's something I've been working on for a while now.

__________________
FurryFury

"I ask nothing but what you would freely give me. I honor you as you are, not as something to change." ~ Me

Helping people is one of my drugs but the overdose can be a real bitch. ~ Me

Warning: Steroids make me snappish. ~ Me

The stories I have here at Lit: Vote if you like the stories!
http://english.literotica.com/storie...ge=submissions

Fury's Filthy Stories: http://www.literotica.com:81/forum/s...d.php?t=400253
  Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump



All times are GMT -4. The time now is 06:05 AM.

Copyright 1998-2013 Literotica Online. Literotica is a registered trademark.