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CuteBrat said:
So then the answer is give up? And I don't quite get how gyms DON'T work for anyone. Its not rocket science to lose weight folks. Burn off more calories than you consume. Eat veggies and complex carbs. Don't eat white bread or white rice or white pasta. don't drink soda. That's it. Don't tell me there's some reason you can't do that.
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You are assuming that everyone can AFFORD a gym membership when you state it that way. Yes I am overweight but I am also unemployed at the moment so paying for a gym membership is not high on my list of expenditures. Due to the unemployment I am losing my house so I moved in with my son and daughter in law. I contribute to the grocery bill but their house so they cook what they want, yes they are heavy but they are comfortable with it so they don't always cook healthy meals. I cannot afford to go buy extra groceries to eat healthy, I do try to watch the amount of food I take in but that only goes so far. Just so you know I used to work in a production plant and warehouse worker and I was a lot skinnier but due to my knees starting to wear out I took an office job for the last 18 months which is where the weight gain came in, it was also a lower paying job than what I had before so I had to cut back on expenses.

MY point is though, that you would not even look my way since I don't wear the high dollar suits and I have a weight problem, you write me off as having a dysfunctional personality without ever getting to know me because you have judged the book by the cover. I happen to think I am a reasonably intelligent older male with a lot of redeeming qualities, you would never know that because you would look at me and see my stomach and judge me not worthy. The creepy thing was thrown about earlier and one of the things that was mentioned repeatedly was respect, well sadly I am not feeling very "respected" at the moment.

I guess I will go hang out on the overweight older men thread, I understand now what Grace meant when she said she was done here. I may read the thread but I am thinking seriously that I am done posting on it for a while.
 
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DaddyJohn said:
You are assuming that everyone can AFFORD a gym membership when you state it that way. Yes I am overweight but I am also unemployed at the moment so paying for a gym membership is not high on my list of expenditures. Due to the unemployment I am losing my house so I moved in with my son and daughter in law. I contribute to the grocery bill but their house they cook what they want, yes they are heavy but they are comfortable with it so they don't always cook healthy meals. I cannot afford to go buy extra groceries to eat healthy, I do try to watch the amount of food I take in but that only goes so far. Just so you know I used to work in a production plant and warehouse worker and I was a lot skinnier but due to my knees starting to wear out I took an office job for the last 18 months which is where the weight gain came in, it was also a lower paying job than what I had before so I had to cut back on expenses.

MY point it though that you would not even look my way since I don't wear the high dollar suits and I have a weight problem, you write me off as having a dysfunctional personality without ever getting to know me because you have judged the book by the cover. I happen to think I am a reasonably intelligent older male with a lot of redeeming qualities, you would never know that because you would look at me and see my stomach and judge me not worthy. The creepy thing was thrown about earlier and one of the things that was mentioned repeatedly was respect, well sadly I am not feeling very "respected" at the moment.

I guess I will go hang out on the overweight older men thread, I understand now what Grace meant when she said she was done here. I may read the thread but I am thinking seriously that I am done posting on it for a while.
Click to expand...

Oh poor you....you can't afford a gym membership. Can you not afford to walk a few miles every day either? Can you not afford to take up running? Can you not afford to do pushups?

And its interesting that you apparently CAN afford a computer and internet...but I understand priorities.
 
DaddyJohn said:
You are assuming that everyone can AFFORD a gym membership when you state it that way. Yes I am overweight but I am also unemployed at the moment so paying for a gym membership is not high on my list of expenditures. Due to the unemployment I am losing my house so I moved in with my son and daughter in law. I contribute to the grocery bill but their house so they cook what they want, yes they are heavy but they are comfortable with it so they don't always cook healthy meals. I cannot afford to go buy extra groceries to eat healthy, I do try to watch the amount of food I take in but that only goes so far. Just so you know I used to work in a production plant and warehouse worker and I was a lot skinnier but due to my knees starting to wear out I took an office job for the last 18 months which is where the weight gain came in, it was also a lower paying job than what I had before so I had to cut back on expenses.

MY point is though, that you would not even look my way since I don't wear the high dollar suits and I have a weight problem, you write me off as having a dysfunctional personality without ever getting to know me because you have judged the book by the cover. I happen to think I am a reasonably intelligent older male with a lot of redeeming qualities, you would never know that because you would look at me and see my stomach and judge me not worthy. The creepy thing was thrown about earlier and one of the things that was mentioned repeatedly was respect, well sadly I am not feeling very "respected" at the moment.

I guess I will go hang out on the overweight older men thread, I understand now what Grace meant when she said she was done here. I may read the thread but I am thinking seriously that I am done posting on it for a while.
Click to expand...

CuteBrat said:
Oh poor you....you can't afford a gym membership. Can you not afford to walk a few miles every day either? Can you not afford to take up running? Can you not afford to do pushups?

And its interesting that you apparently CAN afford a computer and internet...but I understand priorities.
Click to expand...

I had to come back because I knew you would try to pick apart what I wrote, I bolded the part about living with my son, I access the internet through them, and the computer is a 3 year old laptop bought when I was working in a warehouse. I also live in the midwest and this time of year it is tough to go for a walk when it is 20 degrees outside or colder and a windchill that can get into the negative teens, walking outdoors is not really advised. The knees kind of limit the running option but I see you missed that in my original post too. Pushups, not a problem but is that really going to eliminate a stomach problem? Last I knew it might......but that would build the arms first. Yes I can do situps and those will help, just so you know, I have exercise induced asthma I was diagnosed with that at the age of 4.

I guess I should concede the fact that no matter what I have proven you right, I guess by gaining weight I am a terrible person with NO redeeming values and just leave it at that since that is what you are stuck on......how a person looks.
 
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DaddyJohn said:
I had to come back because I knew you would try to pick apart what I wrote, I bolded the part about living with my son, I access the internet through them, and the computer is a 3 year old laptop bought when I was working in a warehouse. I also live in the midwest and this time of year it is tough to go for a walk when it is 20 degrees outside or colder and a windchill that can get into the negative teens, walking outdoors is not really advised. The knees kind of limit the running option but I see you missed that in my original post too. Pushups, not a problem but is that really going to eliminate a stomach problem? Last I knew it might......but that would build the arms first. Yes I can do situps and those will help, just so you know, I have exercise induced asthma I was diagnosed with that at the age of 4.

I guess I should concede the fact that no matter what I have proven you right, I guess by gaining weight I am a terrible person with NO redeeming values and just leave it at that since that is what you are stuck on......how a person looks.
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I think that, ultimately, life comes down to a choice betwen excuses and opportunities. And we are each free to choose which of those we will focus upon. I don't think you, or anyone, is a terrible person BECAUSE you are fat. But I do think its usually a clear indication, as your words certainly confirm, of a focus on the excuse end of that excuse=opportunity continuum.
 
CuteBrat said:
I think that, ultimately, life comes down to a choice betwen excuses and opportunities. And we are each free to choose which of those we will focus upon. I don't think you, or anyone, is a terrible person BECAUSE you are fat. But I do think its usually a clear indication, as your words certainly confirm, of a focus on the excuse end of that excuse=opportunity continuum.
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I am just going to reiterate,
Even if everything you think and feel about those
"disgusting" fat people is true.

Be very grateful that when others look at you
they cant immediately see your biggest flaw.
 
I'm saddened at the recent conversation and what I perceive to be negative and judgmental tone. We all have preferences and differences of opinion. Part of the reason behind this site, this board, this thread is to be able to express appreciation for our fetishes not to alienate our be alienated.

Maybe there can be an agreement to disagree?

I'm still lovin' the older gents!
 
I personally, like that younger women like older men like me... :)

Just sayin'... :D
 
TexasWife25 said:
I am just going to reiterate,
Even if everything you think and feel about those
"disgusting" fat people is true.

Be very grateful that when others look at you
they cant immediately see your biggest flaw.
Click to expand...

Nuff said.........simple.........honest.......and so true.......I love your posts........:heart:
 
CuteBrat, it's obvious you've touched quite a large nerve here.

I've been into diet and exercise for a long time, as has been my wife. I understand what it means to burn the fat and feed the muscle. I understand the relationship between calories in, calories out. I understand what it means to eat your food as if it were a prescription. I understand what it means to be so passionate about something, to believe in it so much, that it consumes you and takes over your life. When you see body-builders and models and six-pack abs... when you see really fit people, those of us who have been there know they didn't get there by accident; they had to completely change the way they interact with their friends and environmnet (including diet and exercise). No excuses! It takes commitment to the exclusion of whatever it is that you think will have a negative effect upon your goal and vision of who you want to be.

What I've also found out as I've gotten older is, that kind of lifestyle can be burn-out city. Believe me, at your age and until your reach 35-40, your metabolism is your friend. After that, you fight a constant uphill battle. This may be something you haven't experienced yet, and so consequently you have no personal knowledge base. As you get older, it takes more and more work to stay in the shape you once were. Most people do not have the time or energy to sustain the really fit lifestyle. Even people who really want too, find their bodies start breaking down so they need to modify their activities.

Your passion and commitment to stay on the fitness train are commendable characteristics. They work for you. I think where you derailed and began to irritate people is when they perceived you as proseletyzing and casting judgement upon their character. This is one of those teachable moments, as they say. This is one of those times you can learn to grow from what others are saying. Are they asking you for your opinion of their physical status? Listen to their sensitivities, their feelings, their commitment to who they are, just as you're committed to your goals.

You may say you aren't attracted to people who are overweight. Not exactly something you want to say if your desire is to make friends and influence people. Your opinion about others is usually based on what you believe others think and feel about you. Should you have the misfortune to have your body turn into something you perceive is not attractive, what would happen to your friend base? Would they still like you for who you are? Or, are you nothing more than a diet and exercise machine?

I think you are more, and you're finding your way in the world in terms of how to express the total you. Most of the people in the "older" thread have been where you are in terms of being passionate about things in their lives. We've all stumbled in trying to understand why people don't see things the way we see them.

What I've learned is no matter how excited I am about something, no matter how passionate I am, no matter how much I want others to understand me there are times when it is best just to shut up. And that's what I'm going to do now. (steps off soapbox).
 
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Well said.

JonnyD1 said:
CuteBrat, it's obvious you've touched quite a large nerve here.

I've been into diet and exercise for a long time, as has been my wife. I understand what it means to burn the fat and feed the muscle. I understand the relationship between calories in, calories out. I understand what it means to eat your food as if it were a prescription. I understand what it means to be so passionate about something, to believe in it so much, that it consumes you and takes over your life. When you see body-builders and models and six-pack abs... when you see really fit people, those of us who have been there know they didn't get there by accident; they had to completely change the way they interact with their friends and environmnet (including diet and exercise). No excuses! It takes commitment to the exclusion of whatever it is that you think will have a negative effect upon your goal and vision of who you want to be.

What I've also found out as I've gotten older is, that kind of lifestyle can be burn-out city. Believe me, at your age and until your reach 35-40, your metabolism is your friend. After that, you fight a constant uphill battle. This may be something you haven't experienced yet, and so consequently you have no personal knowledge base. As you get older, it takes more and more work to stay in the shape you once were. Most people do not have the time or energy to sustain the really fit lifestyle. Even people who really want too, find their bodies start breaking down so they need to modify their activities.

Your passion and commitment to stay on the fitness train are commendable characteristics. They work for you. I think where you derailed and began to irritate people is when they perceived you as proseletyzing and casting judgement upon their character. This is one of those teachable moments, as they say. This is one of those times you can learn to grow from what others are saying. Are they asking you for your opinion of their physical status? Listen to their sensitivities, their feelings, their commitment to who they are, just as you're committed to your goals.

You may say you aren't attracted to people who are overweight. Not exactly something you want to say if your desire is to make friends and influence people. Your opinion about others is usually based on what you believe others think and feel about you. Should you have the misfortune to have your body turn into something you perceive is not attractive, what would happen to your friend base? Would they still like you for who you are? Or, are you nothing more than a diet and exercise machine?

I think you are more, and you're finding your way in the world in terms of how to express the total you. Most of the people in the "older" thread have been where you are in terms of being passionate about things in their lives. We've all stumbled in trying to understand why people don't see things the way we see them.

What I've learned is no matter how excited I am about something, no matter how passionate I am, no matter how much I want others to understand me there are times when it is best just to shut up. And that's what I'm going to do now. (steps off soapbox).
Click to expand...
 
JonnyD1 said:
CuteBrat, it's obvious you've touched quite a large nerve here.

I've been into diet and exercise for a long time, as has been my wife. I understand what it means to burn the fat and feed the muscle. I understand the relationship between calories in, calories out. I understand what it means to eat your food as if it were a prescription. I understand what it means to be so passionate about something, to believe in it so much, that it consumes you and takes over your life. When you see body-builders and models and six-pack abs... when you see really fit people, those of us who have been there know they didn't get there by accident; they had to completely change the way they interact with their friends and environmnet (including diet and exercise). No excuses! It takes commitment to the exclusion of whatever it is that you think will have a negative effect upon your goal and vision of who you want to be.

What I've also found out as I've gotten older is, that kind of lifestyle can be burn-out city. Believe me, at your age and until your reach 35-40, your metabolism is your friend. After that, you fight a constant uphill battle. This may be something you haven't experienced yet, and so consequently you have no personal knowledge base. As you get older, it takes more and more work to stay in the shape you once were. Most people do not have the time or energy to sustain the really fit lifestyle. Even people who really want too, find their bodies start breaking down so they need to modify their activities.

Your passion and commitment to stay on the fitness train are commendable characteristics. They work for you. I think where you derailed and began to irritate people is when they perceived you as proseletyzing and casting judgement upon their character. This is one of those teachable moments, as they say. This is one of those times you can learn to grow from what others are saying. Are they asking you for your opinion of their physical status? Listen to their sensitivities, their feelings, their commitment to who they are, just as you're committed to your goals.

You may say you aren't attracted to people who are overweight. Not exactly something you want to say if your desire is to make friends and influence people. Your opinion about others is usually based on what you believe others think and feel about you. Should you have the misfortune to have your body turn into something you perceive is not attractive, what would happen to your friend base? Would they still like you for who you are? Or, are you nothing more than a diet and exercise machine?

I think you are more, and you're finding your way in the world in terms of how to express the total you. Most of the people in the "older" thread have been where you are in terms of being passionate about things in their lives. We've all stumbled in trying to understand why people don't see things the way we see them.

What I've learned is no matter how excited I am about something, no matter how passionate I am, no matter how much I want others to understand me there are times when it is best just to shut up. And that's what I'm going to do now. (steps off soapbox).
Click to expand...

I agree with thr previous post...this is very well written. But its entirely off the point.

I wasn't talking about being a bodybuilder or having a six-pack. Those things don't do much for me, possibly because I am into older men. I'm talking about taking the time to not let yourself get fat. These are very different concepts. And you won't convince me that becoming fat is a natural or inevitable consequence off aging. It simply isn't. Its a natural and inevitable consequence of bad CHOICES. And its finally time to call bullshit on people who say its anything else.

As for hurting people's feelings, or whatever...I'm just saying the truth. There is such a confederacy of dunces about fat in this country.....everyone saying "there, there....its not your fault". You know what? It IS your fault. Its the fault of everytime you log onto lit instead of taking a walk. Its the fault of everytime you go to McDonalds. Its the fault of every soda you drink instead of water. If that somehow hurts your feelings, then maybe the problem is with you.

But the good news is....you can CHANGE. So maybe instead of sitting on your ass at the computer thinking what a horrid person I am....you take a walk. Not a long walk....but a FIRST walk. Start changing your lifestyle. Your attitude may change along with your shape.
 
CuteBrat said:
I agree with thr previous post...this is very well written. But its entirely off the point.

I wasn't talking about being a bodybuilder or having a six-pack. Those things don't do much for me, possibly because I am into older men. I'm talking about taking the time to not let yourself get fat. These are very different concepts. And you won't convince me that becoming fat is a natural or inevitable consequence off aging. It simply isn't. Its a natural and inevitable consequence of bad CHOICES. And its finally time to call bullshit on people who say its anything else.

As for hurting people's feelings, or whatever...I'm just saying the truth. There is such a confederacy of dunces about fat in this country.....everyone saying "there, there....its not your fault". You know what? It IS your fault. Its the fault of everytime you log onto lit instead of taking a walk. Its the fault of everytime you go to McDonalds. Its the fault of every soda you drink instead of water. If that somehow hurts your feelings, then maybe the problem is with you.

But the good news is....you can CHANGE. So maybe instead of sitting on your ass at the computer thinking what a horrid person I am....you take a walk. Not a long walk....but a FIRST walk. Start changing your lifestyle. Your attitude may change along with your shape.
Click to expand...


She's absolutely right.

The crap that people put in their mouths just because they find it in a "grocery" store is disgusting. It is not food. It is a mix of highly refined (dead of all nutrients) former food items mixed with chemicals and delivered in fancy packaging. It is not food. Our bodies require real food to stay healthy. The explosion of obesity and diabetes and heart disease and cancer all traces back to the crap you put in your mouth.

Oh, and walking to the fridge at halftime for a diet coke does not count as exercise.
 
TheOlderGuy said:
She's absolutely right.

The crap that people put in their mouths just because they find it in a "grocery" store is disgusting. It is not food. It is a mix of highly refined (dead of all nutrients) former food items mixed with chemicals and delivered in fancy packaging. It is not food. Our bodies require real food to stay healthy. The explosion of obesity and diabetes and heart disease and cancer all traces back to the crap you put in your mouth.

Oh, and walking to the fridge at halftime for a diet coke does not count as exercise.
Click to expand...

I love you ! :)
 
CuteBrat said:
Remember....it is called your birthday SUIT...... :)
Click to expand...



This is very true. And it's the nicest fashion I own. So maybe we could hang out, and I could try straightening your ass out before it gets you in any trouble. :eek:
 
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